Have you ever woken up as a vegetarian cartoon pony? I have, and she won’t shut up about it. I’m stuck in her body as our minds swap control and our memories blur. I can’t seem to do anything right, and it’s even worse when she’s in charge.

Now, we’re in a back and forth war for control of her body. I just want to eat meat again, and have a little personal space. She’s convinced I’m hitting on her friends and trying to score. I’m not sure I can survive the rest of the day, let alone until we fix this.

Edits by: Selbi, Abcron, Breath of Plagues, Refro, Jaestring, The Parasprite, Starbound Gurren
Pre-read by: SkeeterTL, Solidfire, Penjacker, TypewriterError, Pearple Prose
(It took all of them to corral my insanity.)
Cover art by Tsitra360
V1.1-Rated teen sex for strong innuendo.
V1.2-Pinkie Pie now enforcing RIAA guidelines.

When Rainbow Dash receives a package from her grandfather, she discovers an artifact of immense power and potential. An artifact that holds dominion over the very destiny of each and every pony's threads of fate. In the wrong hooves, it could be dangerous, catastrophic even.

Naturally, she abuses it.

Edited by Garnot, Between Lines, Cooopercrisp, Seether00, Don't Look At My Name Bro, and MerlosTheMad.

Preread by Skeeter The Lurker.

This story is a sequel to Dash of Humanity

I'm stuck in Equestria, which reminds me of the dark ages. Instead of internet and fast-food, I have Rainbow Dash. She's been asked to help me learn to fit in... I'd like a refund.

I suppose we got off to a good start, aside from being told that after all I'd done I'd never see Earth again. So long as I can look on the bright side of life, and not get arrested for running pranks on everypony with Dash, I might just survive long enough to find my purpose in Equestria. So help me, however, if I get any vegetable related cutie marks I will choke a Princess.

Cover Art by JinZahn
Sequel to Dash of Humanity
Edited by: Selbi, Abcron, Cassius Litner, Seven Fates,
Refro, BronyWriter