Princess Flurry's dates are not up to Imperial standards.

With thanks to various Discords for brainstorming and Samey90 and RDT for pre-reading.

Since retiring and starting a family with Anon, everyday life for Celestia has been mostly peaceful. At least, it has been when compared to what a typical day was like as a princess. However, that doesn't mean her new family isn't really good at keeping her on her hooves anyway.

Just what are they doing now?!

It's been a year since her coronation as queen, and Twilight Sparkle has a lot on her mind. Most importantly, the actions of a certain draconequus and how they helped her along her journey.

If there's one thing the denizens of Equestria have always needed, it's to have somewhere to relax and knock back a few drinks. The tales that follow chronicle Haggis, a surly ex-adventurer, and her plucky human assistant, as they attempt to live their lives and please customers of all varieties.

Artwork by AnonTheAnon (Twitter @RealAnonTheAnon)

If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE

This story is a sequel to Bed Bug

It was two months ago that you and Chrysalis struck a deal. Now, the two of you live together in your Ponyville home, under the condition that you share your love with the ex-queen while she... doesn't do villain stuff. You've grown quite close in that time, but despite getting her to slowly come out of her shell around you, she still refuses to leave the house.

So when you wake up one day to discover that she has contracted some sort of illness, it comes as a bit of a shock. She has apparently never been sick before, and you don't know enough about changelings to help her yourself. It seems like the only solution is to find somecreature who does.

However, the past is not so easily forgotten. How can you get help when the Changeling Kingdom wants nothing to do with her? When the wounds that she caused run so deep that even children bear their scars? When Chrysalis herself is so stubborn, so prideful, that she is unwilling to admit her fault in any of it?

When is a crime too terrible to forgive?

For a human that ended up in an alien world full of talking ponies, you've been living a surprisingly boring life. Sure, you have friends and go on adventures and stuff, but you don't really have a "purpose" per se. At least, you didn't until about a month ago, when a "heinous villain" that had been turned to stone went missing from Canterlot. Now, there's a washed-up queen crashing in your basement and stealing your love.

If only you could get her to admit that she doesn't actually steal it from you.

What started as a normal friendly visit ends up taking two ponies on a trip down memory lane that leads them both to realize their friendship began even before Rainbow Dash's first sonic rainboom.

For a thousand years, Canterlot Castle has stood as a bastion of order, hope, and prosperity for all. In those thousand years, there have been some off days.

Today happens to be one of those days. Unfortunately.

This story is a sequel to Looking Glass

Page is stuck. He never wanted to be a Prince. But he can't just... stop. Ponies are depending on him now and he's feeling the pressure.

Being a Prince isn't all that it's cracked up to be. It's all work and so much responsibility. Ponies plot against you constantly. Luckily, sometimes it's for your own good.

Other times... not.

Big thanks to Arratra for betaing this one.

Cheesy pick-up lines? Really? They're so dumb!
Who comes up with this stuff?
There's no way that actually works.

...Does it?