• Member Since 13th Feb, 2012

Themaskedferret


I'm many former things.

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Total Words: 21,471,680
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T
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Running across Equestria, a vast network of pipes transfers soup from the mines out West to hungry ponies on the East Coast. Few ponies sitting down to a bowl of fresh cazuela ever think about the soup pipeline.

For Langy, it’s her job. It’s her life.

The soup must flow.


Now with an audio reading by Wonder Gala (on Soundcloud)

Chapters (1)
E
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In an unremarkable city, in an unremarkable hospital, to two unremarkable ponies, a filly was born. A filly who was all too remarkable. A filly who radiated Destiny, and Adventure.

Her parents, however, liked their unremarkable life, in their unremarkable city, and wanted nothing more for their little filly than to have a nice, normal, unremarkable youth. So whenever Destiny or Adventure reared their heads, they made sure to nip it in the bud. Magical portals, foreign princes, time travellers and mysterious salesponies of magical musical instruments all got the same answer:

Nope.


Based on the Nope: The Anime joke (original posts) that went around on Tumblr some years ago. Expect silliness.

Covert art based on a picture by greyscale / Theponysketchguy, edited by me to change her hair and eye colour and make her look younger.


Spanish version:
Un poni llamado Nop on DeviantArt, translated by SPANIARD KIWI.

Chapters (12)
T

Spike has always, maybe, sorta KINDA had a crush on Fluttershy. Only, he doesn't believe he's dragon enough to deserve her. When Twilight (accidentally) transforms him into a ferret, he's left in Fluttershy's care.

Can he become more than a pet?


A Gift to the Greatest and Kindest Big Sis in the World, The Masked Ferret!

(And rated MOSTLY Safe for Ferret!)

Chapters (1)
T

This story is a sequel to Sniffles


Having recovered from the lowly sabotage that had seen her briefly bedridden, The Queen and her thoroughly useless human servant can now proceed with vengeance, domination, victory and all other things that come naturally to her.

Events conspire to make this difficult.

Chapters (17)
E

Each of the Bearers of Harmony came to that first Grand Galloping Gala with a dream in her heart and dreadfully few relevant facts in her mind. Rarity dreamt of finding her Prince Charming. She knew his name, appearance, and not much else.

But in this timeline, one of her friends has her back.

Chapters (1)
E

Celestia ruled Equestria for centuries through wisdom, gentle guidance, and an eye on those who rule through less kind means. But above all, she had faith in the power of friendship and harmony.

Right now, she still has the wisdom and the faith. That may just be enough to find a way back to Equestria. Or find love.

Or, at the absolute least, get her new roommate to stop speaking in broken Neighponese.

An entry in the Monthly Contest Club's Crackships for Christmas contest.

Chapters (1)
T

It seems that no amount of stalling, negotiation, or bargaining will stop the council.

Since Princess Twilight's coronation, the Royal Council have insisted that she be tied to a Canterlot noble, so as not to lose their hold over the lands south of Canterlot.

Tied in marriage, that is, and they've got just the pony in mind, whether he's got a say in it or not.

A commission for Dusk Raven. Cover art here.

Chapters (3)
E

This story is a sequel to My Domestic Equestria


Applejack doesn’t get the chance to speak that often, to say what she really wants. That’s okay. I’d like to have a conversation with her anyway.


Reading “My Domestic Equestria” first will help get into the mindset of this one, but it isn’t necessary to understand it.

Chapters (1)
T

Flash Sentry: hero, heart breaker ... and self-admitted coward. For the first time, he details his own undeserved rise to heroism (as well as the trouble such a reputation brings him) in his own words.

Chapters (8)
T
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Miss Cheerilee has always looked out for her former pupil, Pinkamena Diane Pie ("Pinkie" to her friends).

Hooves must always (always) look after his current employer, Roland Bertram Aethelnoth Whickers the Third, Viscount Astley ("Bertie" to his friends).

But when Bertie met Pinkie, something happened that neither the schoolteacher nor the butler had looked for.

Art: Giorgio de Chirico, "Oriental Horses"

Chapters (1)