• Published 20th May 2019
  • 5,676 Views, 477 Comments

A Pony Named Nope - Nyerguds

In an unremarkable city, in an unremarkable hospital, to two unremarkable ponies, a filly was born. A filly who was all too remarkable. A filly who radiated Destiny, and Adventure. Her parents did not approve.

  • ...

Nope 02: Nope and the Time Travellers

"It's too much!" Nope's mother yelled. "I can't take it anymore!"

Noble Pinion, generally known as 'Nope', was three years old, and, so far, all things considered, she'd had a rather normal and unremarkable foalhood.

"Now, dear..." her husband tried, futilely.

"Don't you 'now dear' me!" his wife said. "You're not the one who has to chase off the magical talking cats, prevent her from following the will-o-wisps into some magical well that wasn't there the day before, or clean up behind the scores of cute fluffy animals that turn up on a daily basis. In a fourth floor apartment, no less!"

"We discussed this, didn't we? You can't leave! She'll just have a tragic backstory, to boot!"

"No," Nope's mother said, resolutely. "I'm the one who's having a tragic story right now. I've had enough."

And thus, at the age of three, Nope tragically lost her mother, and it fell upon her father to keep away the pixies, brick up the spontaneously appearing gateways to alternate dimensions, and chase away the breezie godmothers that wanted to offer magical gifts to the foal.

As she grew up, she learned to deal with situations like that. Don't talk to strangers. Especially don't talk to mysterious strangers. Don't make any foalhood promises with best friends. Don't make time capsules.

"You have to make your own story," her dad told her. "Don't let destiny sweep you away. Adventure generally just gets you hurt."

And she replied, "Okay," and helped him clean up the shards of the magical mirror that had somehow appeared in her bedroom.

"Daad!" Nope's voice came from her bedroom.

Her dad got up from the couch and walked to her room. "What's wrong, Nope?" he asked as he opened the bedroom.

The filly, who was now six years old, sat upright in her bed and pointed at the pony in the metallic suit. "I think it's a time traveller."

The pony in the suit looked at Nope's father. "Sir, it is of the utmost importance that I—"

"So," Nope's dad interrupted him. "Time traveller, huh?"

"Uh. Yes."

"From the future, I assume?"

"Indeed. Twen—"

"So, then you surely know all about time, don't you?" Dad interrupted him.

"Oh. Well. I am intimately familiar with the inner workings of time, y—"

"Good. Then you should know it's her bed time," he said, his eyes narrowing. "Little fillies need their sleep. If you insist on visiting her at this hour of the night, young stallion, I suggest you come back in about ten years."

"Good sir, you don't understand! I have to gi—"

"I'm tired," the filly said. "Just lemme sleep."

Nope's dad tilted his head. "You heard the filly. Now leave, or I will call the Guard."

"This is a matter far beyond the Guard!" the time traveller said, slightly panicky.

"Well, why didn't you say so?" Nope's dad deadpanned. "I'll just get a kitchen knife, then, and stab you until you leave." His eyes narrowed. "And if you just come back right away after taking the time to heal in the future? I'll just stab you again until you get the message."

"But... you are dooming the future to—"

This time, the time traveller did not get interrupted by Nope's dad. A blue flash appeared next to him, and out of it came another pony in a metallic suit. Notably, this one had a long scar on his left cheek, and an eyepatch covering his right eye. For the rest, he was completely identical to the other one, except for maybe looking a few years older.

"Hey," he said, to his younger self. "He's serious. It's not worth it. Just abort the mission. Maybe we can get to Twilight Sparkle instead."

The younger time traveller gave him a sour look. "Twilight Sparkle? You know how she is with time travel in this period! One botched time-loop turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy, and she stops taking it all seriously! We're months before the Glimmer Incident; trying to get through to her will be a pain!"

"Trust me. This was more pain," the older one said, pointing to his eyepatch. His younger self grumbled, tapped a few keys on a device on his leg, and disappeared in a blue flash.

Nope's dad looked at the remaining silver-suited pony and cocked an eyebrow. "Did you just cause a time paradox?"

"Psh. Those things are overrated," the time traveller said. "Anyway, be grateful. It took me six times getting stabbed to finally get the message. You don't go for the eyes unless you get really mad. I just saved us both a lot of trouble."

The stallion tapped a few keys on the device on his leg, just like his younger self had done, and disappeared in a blue flash.

Nope looked at her dad. "Time travellers are weird," she said.

"Indeed, they are," her dad said, while tucking her in. He gave her a kiss on the forehead. "Goodnight, sweetie."

"Night, dad."