Lyra and Bon Bon love each other, but they have a ... somewhat unusual relationship. One of them is a secret agent. One of them is a changeling.

And the third one is a perfectly normal pony, about to have her life turned upside down.

This may result in some questionable relationship decisions.

Third-place winner of FamousLastWords' "A Two-Faced Charade" competition!
"This story [is] a ride … chaotic, crazy, wild, an emotional rollercoaster." –FamousLastWords

Thanks to Titanium Dragon and BlazzingInferno for prereading suggestions. Cover art by mostlyponyart (whose blog seems to have vanished).

There's a crime wave gripping the sleepy town of Apple-Morepone, and nopony on the City Watch seems to care. Corporal "Rainbow" M. Dash naps through her patrols, her partner Dobby is an infamous kleptomaniac, Captain Rhymes is a drunkard, and the entire Watch is a group of burnt-out misfits.

They're about to meet a batpony (adopted) by the name of Carrot, visiting town to return an overdue library book.

And none of their lives will ever be the same.

A crossover/homage to the "City Watch" books of Terry Pratchett's Discworld, written to be readable without any familiarity with the series (though they're excellent, and if you do read them you'll catch my Pratchett in-jokes).

Winner of Aragon's "Comedy Is Serious Business" Contest! "I was quoting this offline for days, forgetting where I was remembering the lines from. … This story made me legitimately jealous, both of its cleverness and of its funniness." –Contest judge MrNumbers

Rated ★★★★★ by Louder Yay! "The best comedy I've read in a long time."

"Highly Recommended" by Super Trampoline! (Video review here @ 09:17) "It's 13,000 words long, but it doesn't feel long, because so much fun stuff is happening."

Thank you to Themaskedferret and Caliaponia for prereading, and GaPJaxie for motivation/inspiration!

A delinquent young alicorn named Luna just transferred to the Royal Crystal Academy, and Drying Paint has fallen head-over-hooves in love. But she doesn't care about him — or seemingly anything, except for the dark, mysterious gathering place she disappears to on weekends.

Paint might just find a chance to win her heart there. But the shadows hold dangers he never would have expected, and everyone must walk into the darkness alone.

Highly Recommended by Present Perfect! "It's won one contest and taken second in another … because it's outlandish, ballsy, and utterly unique. Read it."

Winner of Cynewulf's Worldbuilding Contest! "Horizon manages to hit both the kind of reader who likes Infinite Jest and the kind who hasn't cracked a physical book since high school, and he does so simultaneously. This is one of his better stories."

Won second place in the 9/2017 "True Colors" Writeoff (as a first draft)! Then third place in the Lunbra group's "An Unexpected Meeting" contest! Also featured by Seattle's Angels!

Praise for the Writeoff version:
"Seriously though, Loveless is one of the coolest things I've yet seen in the fandom." —CoffeeMinion
"Dear god I love this so much. ... The story crashed into me with energy, style, and pizzazz." —MrExtra
"Literally the story of how gothic clubbing destroyed the Crystal Empire." —horizon

Cover art by Graypaint. My thanks to GaPJaxie and Haze for editing assistance!

Twilight Sparkle only wanted to go off-script in her Harvestfeast speech to talk about books — upending the Equestrian calendar wasn't the plan. But there's no stopping an idea whose time has come.

She and her friends just invented Black Friday.

Celestia help them all.

Written for the "Here at the End of All Things" Writeoff, and lightly edited for FIMFiction.

Cover art by karpet-shark.

This story is a sequel to The Last Dreams of Pony Island

If somehow you're reading this without having read The Last Dreams Of Pony Island, stop now and read that first. Otherwise, this will make no sense and thoroughly spoil that story!

The Last Dreams Of Pony Island told a tale of an Equestrian colony's last days and a hated merchant's disappearance by the docks. Back in 2015 I held a contest for entrants to piece together Myinnkyun's mysteries and provide the best explanation for what happened to Peridot (and the town). These are the collected submissions; I'm publishing it now because unpublished stories are no longer accessible.

Each chapter is a separate entry by a different author, narrating one proposed epilogue for Pony Island from the point of view of the individual who they decided was the one peering into the other residents' dreams. They were originally presented here anonymously and in a random order, for purposes of contest judging; after the competition was over I added each author's username to their chapter title.

A list of entrants, and more details, can be found at this blogpost here. The contest is long since over, though; this post has the winners.

Troubled. Disturbed. Stabbed. Entombed.

Sometimes, when you're playing a word game with a magical princess from another world, the words you choose aren't just words.

This is a brief "Humanized Pony Visits Earth" tale, based on a minific I wrote for (but was unable to submit to) the July 2017 "TBD" Writeoff.

Rated "Recommended" by Titanium Dragon! "While the Pony On Earth thing might put some people off, here I felt like it made excellent use of the idea … This is a short and punchy piece, and I think a lot of folks will find it worth their while."

Reviewed by Chris! "It's refreshing to read a story with a clear, explicit moral that nevertheless doesn't beat you over the head."

Thanks to Morning Sun for prereading/copy-editing changes, and to Titanium Dragon for the story description.

Principal Celestia always has wings in her dreams.

They got her into trouble, once. She let herself believe that they meant she was an angel. Then she grew up, and learned some hard lessons about what being an angel really required.

Now six magical girls have just fought a demon in front of her school. And her phantom wings are itching.

Her life is turning upside down ... and she hasn't even heard about Equestria yet.

Highly Recommended (Top 15 stories sitewide) by Present Perfect! "It's f**king flawless, you guys. … The first 300-word chapter by itself is a masterpiece."

"Literally the single best EqG story on the site." —Professor Plum

Rated ★★★★ by Louder Yay! "A lesser writer might have made a horrible, cliché-ridden mess of this story, but fortunately horizon is not a lesser writer. For a start, it's by some distance the best portrayal of the human world's Celestia I've read."

Third place in the "Under the Sun" June 2017 Writeoff!  (That first draft has been revised and expanded for FIMFiction.) Praise for the Writeoff version:

"Holy cow ... That's how you write an EqG fanfic! You captured the heart and SOUL of this/your version of Principal Celestia, wrapped it up in bi-universal consistency, and sold me on an idea of redemption I didn't even know I needed." —Xepher

"This is gorgeous. A thorough, exhaustive, incredibly moving portrait of a character who I don't think I've ever seen get quite this much development or attention." —Posh

"This is actually, after all these years, an original take on a story on Luna's banishment. If that's not something to be celebrated I don't know what is." —Quill Scratch, Radio Writeoff

MORE REVIEWER PRAISE: Rated "Definitely Read" by Super Trampoline! Reviewed by City of Doors! Reviewed by Titanium Dragon! Featured on Equestria Daily!

Rated T for brief cursing and alcohol use. Cover art by Seniloko, used under Creative Commons license.

When Spike starts exhibiting symptoms of drug use, it's time for Twilight Sparkle (and her M.A.R.E. pamphlets) to stage an intervention.

If only Spike's drug use was Twilight's biggest problem.

A silly little stoner-holiday dramedy. Happy 420, yo.

Written for the "Rising From The Ashes" Writeoff based on this picture. (dude spoilers lol) "Praise" from fellow participants:

"competently executed" - Posh
"kind of funny" - Titanium Dragon [reviewed here]
"Mid-tier" - Fenton

Recommended by Present Perfect! "Trust horizon to turn a drug comedy into something that connected with me in an unexpected way. ... well written and has a great running gag." no pp what r u doin ur sposed to hate it D:

Dobbin's been sneaking bites from the National Strategic Wheatgrass Reserve again ... and it finally occurs to his parole officer to wonder why Equestria has one. She asks Princess Celestia for the story.

It turns out there are some things ponies weren't meant to know.

A bunch of Writeoff Association authors got bored while waiting for the October 2015 prompt, and did a silly collaborative story jam on the Writeoff thread. This was the result. This story was co-written by myself, Georg, Not_A_Hat, CoffeeMinion, and Morning Sun, based on an unintentional prompt by Monokeras. (You can see who wrote what at the source thread.)

* * *

Reviewed by City of Doors! (but y tho)

There's a lot of things about Cadance and Shining Armor that never quite made sense: their sudden appearance before the Royal Wedding; their suspiciously convenient suitability as rulers of the Crystal Empire; their oddly abbreviated pregnancy; and even their quick change of heart after Spike asked them to forgive Thorax.

Twilight Sparkle knows exactly how deep that conspiracy goes — she was there in the beginning, when her hive's queen created Shining. And she wasn't happy about it.

Finalist in the "Things Left Unsaid" December 2015 Writeoff! Rewritten and greatly expanded to fill in more backstory and to account for Season 6 canon.

Rated 'Worth Reading' by Titanium Dragon! "If [you like] the idea of a story which hints at a greater conspiracy behind the scenes which explains some of the plot holes we see in the series, you’ll likely enjoy this."
Reviewed by Matthewl419!

Cover art by Lo-23, using Twilight from "Deception is Magic" by Heilos.