The red maned, black coated alicorn Mary Sue is having trouble making friends in Canterlot. Princess Celestia sends her to Ponyville, to learn about the magic of friendship from Twilight Sparkle and her friends. With any luck, they can show her just where she's going wrong.
I hope to make this a believable story about an unbelievable character. Inspired by "The Red Maned, Black Coated Alicorn Mary Sue Has a Birthday Party", but not in continuity with it.
Image is most generously provided by IzanagiSinX. Check him out here or on deviantART!
Chapters (1)
Hello, everypony! This is a little different from my usual stories - I don't usually write metafiction, and I don't plan to make a habit of it, but the idea behind this story moved me sufficiently that I really wanted to get it out there. So, apologies in advance if this story simply doesn't work out. I'll do my best, though. I'm also not quite sure where this story belongs on the line between comedic and serious, so that might be a bit awkward too.
This story is, of course, inspired by The Red Maned, Black Coated Alicorn Mary Sue Has a Birthday Party. It's not in the same continuity, though - my Mary Sue has a different family background, and will have very different experiences in Ponyville.
As I said in the summary, I'm trying to write a believable story about an unbelievable character. I believe that, no matter how overpowered or cliché a character is, he or she only becomes a Mary Sue when the story and the setting twist to make everything about her. She encounters no meaningful obstacles in her life, the only ponies who dislike her or disagree with her are later shown to be selfish and wrong, the very rules of the universe change to accommodate her, and so on. My hope with this story is to hit plenty of character triggers for being a Mary Sue, but not the story triggers. We'll see how that goes.
If you like, you can list the Mary Sue tropes that you find in the story. I'll even give out ten points for each one! Everypony loves points, right?
Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story!
Oh, her cutie mark is an infinity symbol. That kinda makes sense.
Oh look, more brain-clogging meta humor that I thought was banned from the site. Thanks moderators.
I take it you wrote this to hop on the featured story train because what'sisfaces stories have been so successful.
Ugh. You write well, but I think this was a bad idea, a really bad idea.
I have absolutely no objections to this whatsoever. But, why red and black always?
Violet and blue, heck, Violet and white is a nice combo, too.
...I kinda like them?
wow, all the negativity... well this is on my list to read and now its closer to the top :3
I don't understand why people are suddenly pissed off about mary's fics getting featured.
In my opinion they were good and either hit me in the feels or made me giggle.
This is just the third of hopefully many fics to include Mary.
and future reference, Mary isn't an "OC" she is supposed to be the embodiment of what a Mary Sue actually is and expresses that they have feelings too. lol
I don't care what they say fox, go ahead and continue this!
Alright, I'll treat this like a "Where's Waldo". Except instead of a red and white sweatered man, I'm looking for tropes!
- Mary Sue is able to do even difficult tasks with skill in a short amount of time
- Mary Sue is an alicorn, giving her above average powers in all categories.
- Mary Sue is distinctively colored in a way no other ponies are.
That's all I'm going to bother with for now, will track by way of Read Later. Grammar is legible at least.
1559682 YOU
YOU ARE A TERRIBLE PERSON(currently)
DO NOT ENCOURAGE THESE FICS
THEY ARE A PISS STAIN ON THIS SITE
PLEASE, JOIN US IN PURGING THIS SITE OF TERRORS SUCH AS THESES
Or don't. I can't make you do anything. But seriously, these fics are shit.
I actually enjoy these stories. So yeah.
Yes I thumbs upped this story, I did. I like this story only because it has the chance to turn the super special amazing god-modded powers of a Mary Sue from a badly written strength into a potentially well thought out weakness. I mean imagine it, Everyone and there brother is jealous of you because you can do things better than they can, you go someplace else and the same thing happens, and as you see the trend, you start trying your best to be second best at things that you want to do. To the author I say, you have done a great job in giving me as a reader a chance to understand what makes Mary Sue an actual Mary Sue now make with the magicks of telling me how she's gonna change. And as for all of the haters who hate this kind of fic I say unto you, if you don't like it don't read it. It's that easy.
1559702 Shit... take it easy.
1559637 Hey the feature box works by number of views primarily, and sometimes you've gotta stir s**t up in order to convince people to read an author they've never heard of before.
1559639 You again? I think we both know that thinking this person is going to forever write these kinds of fics in the future is laughable. Sometimes a person's just gotta write something to get it out of their head. Other times one takes a drastic shift in what genre they write to see what the other ideas are like.
To HopeFox though, IF this does get featured, don't take it as a sign that you should write nothing but these kinds of fics, go on to explore your own original ideas, give your take on some of the other tropes and trends. Your grammar is decent enough, and it is always nice to see what an author produces when they exert themselves in different ways.
1559702
ugh, truthfully people like this should be removed from the site.
you spaz out over a story for all I know, you didn't even read.
it's meta, therefore it's bad.
i DO encourage Mary fics because I like the basis and in fact do the art for KoS
1559732 CANNOT EVEN, BLOOD PRESSURE- *head explodes*
Nah, I'll just vent this into a blog or something.
1559747 True. But these fics are just... ugh.
1559752 For your information, I did read it. I always read before opinions. And the story still sucked ass. The grammar was fine, but the trope is just THE WORST THING YOU CAN WRITE ABOUT. And the story itself was a "meh", even if I didn't hate the trope. Nearly as bad as the "Ponyearthverse" trope.
All of this is just my opinion, however.
Ahh god why did I click on regs link?!
Again?
1559732 I'm with you. This was OBVIOUSLY written in the hopes of
earningcheating your way into the feature box.1559774 Sorry I exposed you to this.
1559787 It's sad, isn't it?
1559805 UNDERSTATEMENT!!!
It's down right pathetic!
1559820 As previosuly stated:
And then people go ahead and try to defend this
I'm so writing a torture fic in which I get to do all SORTS of things to Mary Stu here...
1559827
Somewhere along the lines of Patient X?
I'm all for it!
1559848 More like "I take a shitload of drugs and use every single thing in my demented imagination to put pain into the Alicorn" type of this.
But I'll link you once it's up
1559787 We just seem to keep running across one another.
Hrm, not in line with continuity? Still worth a read. Alright, story was not that bad, people have been unnecessarily down voting you.
1559867 You ARE in a lot of areas in this site... mabe it's destiny.
1559637 Isn't it a bannable offense to point out that a story shouldn't have passed moderation?
1559880 Maybe.... the only reason I'm not following you is because you already have a lot of followers and I hate hopping on the bandwagon train.
hmmmmm
1559888 ......
No, it's not.
1559890 Never stopped me. Watch!
1559895
I thought I saw it in the news box not that long ago, but when I checked I didn't find anything.
We need to go to space...
To get away from these horrible fics! Also because space.
1559637 I don't think this is the kind of meta that's against the rules. It's making fun of a trope, not of the site or its users.
...it is kind of cheating to pretend to be the next entry in somebody's else's series though when you're not. Yeah, the description clears that up but by that point you've already got peoples' attention.
1559963 I love you. Please, have my children.
1559880 Destiny? Oooooh, sounds saucy... Sorry, its late at night and my head is in the gutter.1559890
1559963>>1560011>>1559769 The irony of this situation makes me need a lemon, in the good kind of way though.
1559859 You know, after having seen how passionate you are for authors to never write unoriginal ideas, I would love to see you write a fic like that, its originality, inspired by the unoriginality of Meta-Mary-Sue and of Cupcakes.
1560104 Ah yes. I don't hate the authors, just the fiction. People can change you know.
Also... the idea in there being that it MAKES FUN OF the tropes I'll be exploring. That is the idea of a trollfic, dear sir.
Overall, you seem like a cool dude. Even though our opinions differ, and that I've come off as a callous asshole, we can still be friends.
1559908 Not in the news box, but they did post it on their Facebook page. Consider it official.
I DONTKNOW WHO'S SIDE TO BE ON!!!
I liked the story by the way
don't drop the story, and don't listen to haters
1559702 & 1559639
So... I take it you don't like these kinds of stories then? You could at least be more civil in your comments. And if you really don't like them that much, there is always the simple choice of not reading them.
This site really could do with a revamped search/tag system that can be used on a finer level, because as it currently stands it is hard to get around the stories you really don't like (at least for Mary Sue Alicorn haters).
Adding to read later, i am packing right now
Thus far the story is coming along well, despite many's hate for the character and/or story. How many chapters are likely, do you think?
A Mary Sue modeled after Twilight? Interesting.
Wow, apparently you really can get a lot of hate for writing about a red and black alicorn OC. And here I thought that ridiculous trollfic was exaggerating.
The test of good writing is the quality of the story and characters, and that's the basis on which it should be judged. Not on whether it resembles an idea you've seen done before.
1559827
Sooooo...
You are going to write a torture fic where you torture a (meta)character you don't like?
Sounds like a Gary Stu (assuming from your pic that you are male) self insert to me.
Oh yes, and as it is about said character, and you have said you despise said fics...
I think you are missing the point of what you yourself said. Congrats.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ComicallyMissingThePoint
Well I read it and I despise Mary Sues. I think it will be interesting to see if you can pull off a good story with a bad main character.
I disagree with your primary point though. I don't think what makes a Mary Sue a chore to read is that the story is bland and uninteresting with the world bending around them, but rather that there is a disjoint between what they are and how they act. We're seeing it already in your story, where her life is GOOD but she thinks it sucks. THAT is my primary problem with most Mary Sues, that there is a disconnect between what they are and how they act. The enjoyable aspect of a story is the conflict, and Mary Sues can't have it so when people try to put it in, it doesn't work for me.
I'll read the next chapter or two to see if this story is able to circumvent that by writting intentionally to the subject matter.
I laughed out loud a few times. And then more at the trolls' comments, of course.
This was supposed to be a so-bad-it's-funny kind of story. I mean - there's "Mary Sue" in the title. Everyone's complaining because it's bad? You mean to tell me all these guys took this seriously?
