- Member Since 11th Feb, 2014
- offline last seen 10 hours ago
CrimsonWolf360
My passions consume me https://ko-fi.com/crimsonwolf360 or https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4398966 if you wish to help them consume me further. Also I have a discord now https://discord.gg/BvKqTMEnjN
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love this!!
I squeed so hard when I read this! Tempy is such a cute nickname.
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She deserves all thr cute nicknames, cuddles, and kisses she an handle!
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:D
nice.
Crimson you sly dog I should’ve known it was you
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Nice.
If he broke Moondancer's heart that way in this AU, I won't forgive him. It's bad enough Prime-Universe Twilight broke her kohai's heart.
Good story. I'd love to see Dusk be with his other two favorite mares as well.
The story gave me the giggles.
And the fact that you listed each of Dusk's three waifus I had planned in my version of Dusk Shine just proves that very important idea: that he was into bad but recently reformed mares. Rather typical for a good guy, don't you think?
Hell yes! Happy Tempy is always nice to see.
Add Chrysalis and Nightmare Moon to that list and I am right there with you Dusk.
This was a fun read, I always love reading clop fics with Dusk Shine in it. Keep it up.
You should write a sequel with BDSM elements they would make such a good couple.
Part 2 please
Hmm… Seems awfully by-the-numbers and mechanical. Definitely feels more like they’re puppets following a script than real characters. And there’s no twist, nothing particularly unexpected or interesting about it.
That’s not to say the story is poorly written. The actual mechanics of the prose were perfectly fine. It’s just that this story seems a little under-inspired and generic. Bland, even.
Really needs something extra to spice it up. Maybe an extra fetish, maybe at least one of them struggling to resist their urges, maybe a love triangle situation where Dusk already has a marefriend and being with Tempest would be cheating, maybe Tempest having some weird hangups about sex that she learned growing up in her weird situation, or maybe several sexual encounters, each one going a little further than the last, but each cut short as they suddenly realize it’s not a good idea … until they finally lose control and go all the way.
I guess, ultimately, what this story is missing is: conflict. Neither character has any substantial conflict, neither internal nor external.
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Well, it was a pretty quick one shot I did in less than 2 hours. Not to mention, infidelity simply isn't my fetish so I refuse to write about it. You have some good points, but I don't know if I even could fit in a decent amount of conflict in just 2k words.
What a cute little story!
Any chance we could see a similar one featuring any of the other mares he'd listed as his 'favorites'? Most especially Sunset Shimmer? I love Sunset and she seriously needs more love on this site. Still, a fic on Starlight or his Main 6 friends or even Trixie wouldn't be a problem either.