• Member Since 10th Mar, 2017
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Chemtest


Writing’s pretty fun.

Sequels1

T

The year is 3001 in the land of Equestria, just a few months after Luna returned from the moon, and a wedding is happening in Canterlot, on a day that would go on to be known as the Canterlot Invasion. Queen Chrysalis has infiltrated Canterlot along with many other changelings, and are poised to strike

In another realm, far, far away, an ancient evil, a Necromancer known only as Death, would be finally struck down, with seemingly no hope for returning back to life.

———
It’s been a long while since I’ve written a new story, and I’m unsure if I’ll finish this story before I run out of motivation, but I’m going to try my best. This is a rewrite of one of my oldest and, I feel, worse stories, and I wish to show off the improved writing skills I have. Hope you all enjoy.

Chapters (14)
Comments ( 44 )

:pinkiecrazy:
I like this already creep them out, all of them~

I love this story you are a amazing Writer. You must have created a lot of books before this. Or did he go on to some kind of Writer. College.

11695659
I’ve made a lot of stories before, of a lower quality I’d say, but the main reason why I’ve improved so much is doing text based DND with friends for the past few years. It’s helped me refine my writing style and storytelling.

Keep it up, I love the way you're writing the dialog so far

Well I for one hope you don’t run out of motivation to finish this story. Because I’m loving this so far. Just this first chapter alone has peaked my curiosity something fierce.

An ancient Necromancer is kidnapped by Chrysalis,

Is she stupid!?

along with three other fillies

That is another huge mistake as well. :flutterrage:

Hmm yes interesting indeed. And also very confusing as well. I’m assuming these mysteries will be revealed as the story goes on? Or is there some lore we should know from some other source?

I am loving this! thank you for righting this:D

11696038
Most of it will serve a purpose (maybe), but some information included in opening readings will just be extra information that exists just to support other information. But most figures mentioned by name will have some importance, either to the story, or the characters within it. Most. Like the mention of Alaric is just to show to further tie this lore to real history.

The three fillies would go silent at his question, the three looking at each other, then passing out, each collapsing on top of each other on the ground.

So… They know he’s death now?

ooooh Buggy Raven this time~

Definitely enjoying it so far.

The hive mind, ok these changelings are like that

In another realm, far, far away, an ancient evil, a Necromancer known only as Death,

Why not go all the way and make Death a lich?

11697650
This is only my interpretation. But from what I gather he was some sort of Lich/undead. Then he was killed killed by a group of Paladins if I remember correctly. Or am I thinking of a different story I’ve read lately?

Would need to either reread story or wait for authors comment.

11697650

11697669
Yeah, he was a Lich/Necromancer and was slain by a group of paladins right before he ended up Equestria. I mostly called him a Necromancer because it’s the more broad title, and more accurate. Where in my lore, a Lich would be a form of immortal Necromancer who put their soul into a container. Raven never put his soul into a container, he was simply immortal due to his very nature, or, at least, ageless. That’s why I went with Necromancer and not Lich

11696213
Naw I think they passed out because Raven breathe did not know what is a cutie mark

He looks from the map to her, speaking in a passive, cool tone, “By this time next year, Chrysalis, Equestria shall be yours.”

What is one year of work to one such as Death? A fair return for a respect almost never given to him?

This will be fun to observe:D

He then moves to look at her, “Because I want you to watch and look impressed when I do something impressive. It has been a long time since I’ve had a captive audience… quite literally.” He breathes out in a small snort, “That was a joke. I wish to have laymen here, you always have the ability to ask questions which an expert would never even think to ask. Do not disparage yourself, Scootaloo, you are quite useful.”

“If nobody’s standing around looking impressed, whats the point in having you all?!”

-The Doctor from Doctor Who.

Sans Has Joined The Server

Death may make them stand in a corner

I’m a bit confused on why he had a change of heart so fast. But I probably missed something anyway.

11702163
More explaining will happen over time, but I’ll just say that thoughts about destiny, and seeing ancient creatures still happy and finding companionship, it was important to him.

Also he is not the most mentally stable creature so he can change his mind very quickly for reasons that might not make sense to the more mortally minded.

11702174
I think I get it.
I was assuming immoral really old= stubborn and unchanging. But he likes observing things if the PreviousChapters, were anything to go bye, and I imagine for someone who is very interested in the world around them. It would be the exact opposite. they have more experience so They’re more willing to change.

Is that right? Do correct me if I’m wrong.

11702177
For some immortal beings, they would remain stubborn and unchanging, much like Chrysalis is, unable to see anything except her own want for revenge. Raven has meanwhile always had more of a scientific mind, if he sees something, he’s willing to change his theories and views in order to fit it, so to say. To him, immortality was the shedding of care for the mortal and the embracing of the immortal, things like knowledge and science. But seeing the two Kings, who are older than him, being happy together, plus the Crusaders wearing him down, plus all the comments on his destiny, plus the experience of having his essence ripped apart in a dream, it all added up to a sudden shift in view on what immortality means. Most of this has currently remained unsaid in the story, but it will be fairly shortly, as the Crusaders would be very confused about his change.

I’m assuming death is a Lich so he’ll probably just re-materialize next to them.

Then, let’s see how many times he will die in this story :D

Current count: 1-(deaths by Celestia)

And here I am trying to figure out what the hell just happened between Celestia and Raven...

He grins a bit more, “Read your soul? I read a book, Celestia, written by an ancient Emperor. I’ve read quite a lot over the last few weeks, I’ve learned a lot that is useful. Those Crusaders, my… friends, they taught me, however, that life is worth more than learning. That’s why I will not care to learn what the outcome of this spat is, it doesn’t affect me. I came to return them to their sisters and their lives, and then I planned to leave for a distant land, that I might begin my life anew and now burden them with my destiny.”

I would like to say that this is 100% his fault. He did not only give Chrysalis an army in the promise. He's now abandoning it both to fuck off and do something else. Top 10 most irresponsible deities or mortors or gods?

11708322
All according to kaikeku. Everything will moved as the supreme being's desires.

Term "crusaders" here is ironic, once being a synonim of "paladins".

This necromancer got a ton of skeletons in his closet...

11707585
Blue oni - red oni.

:pinkiehappy: okay~ that was nice

Necromancer->Apple farmer

What a job change!
But he cannot complain about it, can he?
You’re lucky to get a job in this kind of zombie economy.

with piercing green eyes staring director at Lyra, especially her horn.

I make the same kind of mistake, but I make it more often.

11707585
They saw themselves in each other it both angered and frightened them

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