I write pony words. Millions of them. Some people actually think they might be worth reading. I am very thankful for that. Also, I have a Patreon now?
It all went wrong. She was supposed to take over the world and rule as the Empress of Friendship. Instead, she was trapped in stone with her conspirators. However, Princess Twilight loves giving people more chances...
Maybe she shouldn't have.
Written for the Cozy Glow contest.
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This is the prompt you used?: -And that was when she realized it had all gone wrong.
11705204
Yes.
Discord is an absolute monster here, which is honestly not too different from his show depiction.
Am I supposed to feel bad for her?
11705221
I feel bad for her
Yes i know all the things she did
But a part of me thinks...no KNOWS that she can be reformed
Interesting that Discord's personal Tsukuyomi variant doesn't include Pinkie Pie, Rarity, or Fluttershy, but does include Applejack. I wonder if that means something.
11705232
There are consequences for ones actions, like it or not. She's lucky, in this scenario, the ponies had surrounded the whole Canterlot baying for blood the second the announcement of release hit the air waves. She is being merely shunned, not even treated badly, just ponies simply wanting nothing to do with her, and you, and those who down voted, are getting all misty eyed because she's getting a slap on the fetlocks.
Yes, it was the a dream, and a decidedly exaggerated one at that because we know the Mane 6, AT THE LEAST, would not act like this save for actual death, although they should. Cozy should have to earn her forgiveness, same as anyone. And the fact she is a foal is the only reasons ponies should be as merciful as they are.
Damn, I wonder what happened when Twi found out Discord like to keep a "living toy" with him every time, he's too obssessed with her that I think he might even turn Zephyr to stone too LOL
But to be fair, I rather stuck inside of a time loop than staying in stone. Both are eternal but Atleast I can feel something
This guy's comic talk about it
https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/vuz9e3/dont_be_afraid_to_catch_feels/
11705309
It's not actually Fluttershy. He's at her gravesite.
11705307
I agree
11705313
Ah, i misunderstood on the “never aged”
11705307
Its literally torture. She is a child who deserved a second chance just like Starlight and Discord. They also left her starving.
Well... It seems Discord is dishing out eternal punishment to soothe his own guilty conscience. He is unable to forgive himself, so he needs to drown the feeling by taking revenge on others. I would feel sorry for him, if I weren't too busy feeling sorry for Cozy Glow, the pony he has been mentally and physically torturing again and again for centuries. Torture isn't justice.
11705397
That would be the idea.
11705220
Sometimes it sucks needing to use canon events and behaviors.
11705387
technically they left her in a state of stasis. We don't really know what state she was in. No pulse to quicken, no heart to race in terror. We can't say to what her feeling was because she was a literal rock. She couldn't feel because there was nothing to feel with.
So she was in terror... until not. Full stop. Then she was back in terror. Start fear again. And shes a child, so her first thoughts are towards herself as such. But no ones torturing her after(we can agree on that it being torture in the first place, maybe.) They're merely waiting for her to actually make the attempt towards being a good pony, to stop feeling sorry for herself and making dewy eyes and boo hooing and say two little words.
But no, right off the bat, its what will you do for me. She didn't see Twilight and beg forgiveness, it was who was going to be saddled with her. She dared to beg food from a stranger who she and her cohorts caused God knows what agony towards instead of hanging her head in shame. Instead of coming to her parents as the prodigal prostrate, knowing her failure, she came expecting forgiveness because they'd love her even if she's a monster. And when faced with the bare truth of her much deserved sentence, she sought an out.
It ends when she decides. No more, no less.
11705429
Stasis that she's conscious throughout. She literally cannot breathe. Yes, she's in constant terror, which combined with the lack of being able to breathe, feeling of abandonment and starvation is basically torture. Discord is literally making her go through this constantly over and over.
No, Discord is lying to Twilight about her condition. He's actively tormenting her out of some sick sense of revenge.
Why should she? It's not like anyone is actively trying to reform her.
Starving filly. No food. No money. Even if she did, no one would sell to her. What exactly was she supposed to do?
Her sentence was completely undeserved, especially considering who it came from. The fact of the matter is that they weren't trying to help her. Discord was actively making her suffer by being made to feel unloved, starving and struggling to breathe.
Interesting execution of a tired concept. Still, I enjoyed this one. I think you followed a good balancing act of different personalities and concepts and presented an interesting premise in-so-far as everyone is characterized. I must admit that I like your depiction of Discord as this, at best, morally questionable entity. It would have been very easy to play him up as a sadistic monster but you added some nuance that make this scenario more intriguing, rather than another soapbox.
I also like that line you added coming from Cozy's dad, that she's only seeking avoiding her punishment rather than actually reforming. It reflects poorly on both Discord and Cozy, because on the one hand it shows how utterly useless Discord's cruelty is here and how it is simply revenge with no further purpose, which is, well, just evil. On the other hand, it does show a lack of self awareness in Cozy. The way the story is written, I don't get the impression that she understands that she did evil things, just that she doesn't want to do them anymore because because she's afraid of being punished for it. It's not an authentic internal change. Basically what A Clockwork Orange was trying to say about how reconditioning and redemption are not interchangeable on a moral plane. I don't know if you intended this or if this is just my interpretation, but I think it adds another layer of profundity to the story.
Finally, I really like the tragedy Discord has put himself into. His inability to let go and forgive has fucked him over completely, because, as he says, if he ever let Cozy go she'd tell what she experienced and then he'd be held accountable. So he continues on with the punishment rather hypocritically at it, even if he admits himself unworthy of handling it. I like this idea that Discord admits to himself that he's a bad person and does it so solemnly rather than delighting himself in it. It adds to the character.
Overall, I think you've presented a very tragic, horrifying situation in which there is no real innocence, save for Twilight, who is unaware of what is going on. As you've probably already guessed, I really like Discord in general, and even if this fic portrays him very unflatteringly, I think it's nuanced enough to be intriguing. I'm not someone who seeks out fanfics that reconsiders the series finale because it's a subject I've thought about on my own and one whose commentaries are trite and repeated (in my opinion), but I liked this story and I'm glad I decided to pick it up. I think you did a good presentation of the drama, presented its characters interestingly, made a good use of the first person narration to add subtext to what is being explicitly stated, and overall, gave proper form to a concept that had more going against it than for it, at least, in my eyes. Great job.
11705468
She's a horse! She can eat grass and for a treat fight the pigs for scraps in their sty now and again.
And why would they? They owe her nothing.
First one, bullshit. It fits about right and shes lucky nopony was killed,
No one has to help her. Forgiveness isn't reserved for the deserved, but they has to be some midway point. As a dog to their sick so to a fool to folly
And thats all he did. And shes not actually struggling, she thinks she is, and even in that case, its for, what, a few moments? He could have filled her days in misery and woe, shattering and tearing her psyche again and again, but doesn't. She has a way out, but its been two hundred years, and she's learned dick diddly
11705645
She a horse? Why she not eat grass
Actually no, ponies in Equestria cannot eat grass. Its like saying Human can eat raw meat just because an Ape can eat it
And why would they? They owe her nothing
Dunno dude, The Main6 own nothing and need nothing from the “Reformed” villians (with the exception of Discord, Celestia say they can use his power) but they still do it
11705721
Actually she can. Says so in this story she just doesn't like it.
Also not my point
What a weird ass torture fic.
11705817
I tried to not make it torture for the sake of it. Discord's torturing her, but at this point it's only because he's gotten himself in too deep, and he never let what the trio go, nor his guilt about it. He knows that Fluttershy would want to give Cozy another chance, but if he does that, Twilight finds out what he's been doing.
So yes, Cozy is going through hell, but I didn't want it to be torture for the sake of a torture fic.
I've always felt that in case of trio there are only a few moral options on what to do after their stoning:
1. Genuinely try to reform them. None of this eternal torture Groundhog Loop with memory erasure after each loop, as this doesn't seem to work in this story despite uncountable loops over centuries. To paraphrase a movie quote, if teacher uses the same method for a hundred times and still the villain does not reform, then they should come to the conclusion that perhaps there's something wrong, either with the method or with the teacher.
2. Unstone them and keep them locked somewhere where they would be guarded and live in decent conditions until they die of old age. That would at least work for Cozy Glow who is mortal pony and maybe Tirek too? I'm not sure whether MLP centaurs are mortal, but long-lived, or are they actually immortal. For Chrysalis we would need another option.
3. Kill them. If they are too dangerous to be unstoned without reforming them and it's not possible to reform them (or you run out of methods to reform them you can think of), then there is no point in further imprisoning or punishing them. Kill them and let them have peace in Equestria's afterlife. I'm usually against death penalty, but if the only alternatives for the trio are fate worse than death (what Discord is doing to them in this story) or being suspended in state between life and death, then I find death for the villains to be right choice.
11705735
Uh no?
This more like she want to eat grass to fill her stomach. These grasses are not real food.
I don't think someone just because they don't like something they rather starve, so more like grass don't help anymore
Even after devouring all these grasses, she doesn't feel any better, she even getting skinnier so grass cannot sustain a pony.
Ok. Part of me wants to like this more, or at least feels like I should be obligated to appreciate stories that take risks like this and aren't afraid to go to some dark places. If that makes sense. But I just can't.
Credit where credit is do, showing Discord's internal conflict about what he's done, does make it a bit more interesting and the ending does give me some hope that he'll undo it, which together would have him more redeemable in my eyes. But after two hundred years of this, it's too little too late for me not see him as just as much of monster as those he's torturing.
And I think it also reflects bad on Twilight. That despite everything Discord did, she blindly trusts his council on this. And not in two centuries, tried to do anything more than sense the statue.
All and all, I was really hoping to enjoy this one, but I found it a pretty unpleasant read. Maybe it's just me, I absolutely hated how the show handled the villainous trip in the first place and I'm not usually one to go for "Dark Fics" anyway. So I might just be letting my personal bias get in the way of appreciating this one.
11706002
Well, Discord is her friend. The only friend she has from that time in her life, except Spike. It might not be the smartest move, especially since it's Discord, but she's always completely trusted her friends. So when he, who is the one who put them in stone in the first place, tells her that all he can feel is rage, and that if they let them out, it would only lead to more pain, she trusts him.
Also, he knows he's being a monster, but he's in too deep. It's selfish, but if he lets her go, he'll probably lose the only friend from that time that HE has left. He has two painful choices in front of him, but they're choices he made because he couldn't let go.
11706001
You know... it's odd.
Usually by this time I make a joke or bow out to avoid ruffling feathers. I normally don't do this internet thing... fuck it, I'm sticking to my guns.
How many? I've seen this absolutist argument before, so lets have it out. How many? You can argue about Discord and Starlight, but they actually realized their mistakes and reformed (with various degrees of success, granted)
So how many? How much damage has to occur, how many lives ruined before her being a foal doesn't matter? It's just stuff man, things! Fine.
How many lives then? How many would have to die because of her direct actions? Maybe a few nobles or Loco weed addicts, the leeches, would they have been fine to be rid of? Where is your tipping point, pray tell?
But ponies shunning beings that torment them, now that's crossing the line!
At this point no doubt think just a story bro. To which I ask then why are you and others so Adamant in your position?
Apologies Brony Writer. This is something of a button issue for me.
11706001
11706152
Yeah, can you please take this somewhere else? I like healthy debate in my comments section when I have something in my story that can be seen multiple ways, not shouting.
11706173
I'm pretty much done. Thank you for putting up with my nonsense
11706173
sure man
11706137
Except Twilight should know better than to blindly trust Discord. Taking away all the times that almost ended in Equestria's destruction, there's all the times he's used that to screw with her for the LOLs.
No way that's stopped in all this time. None of this ruins the story. Just saying.
11706301
I think she trusts him enough to take his word on this, especially since it doesn't fall under either category.
Oh, so that's what that means!
Dark, sinister, and deeply hypocritical, but I would expect no less from Discord.
I find it ironic that parallels can be drawn between Cozy Glow's state and what is quite possibly Discord's own perception of his reformation.
Like Cozy he is left to his own devices while being "starved" of something that is essential to his being. With Fluttershy being the only person who seemingly gives a damn. And of course, so many of the elements are absentee because they were themselves absentee in his reformation.
The analogy isn't flawless, and of course there are plenty of in cannon reasons why this could be taken as a wildly skewed perspective of events, but I could easily see Discord thinking of things in these terms.
Well done with the story. I usually wind up appreciating your work on this site in some capacity and this is no different.
I hope you keep doing what you do and have an enjoyable time doing it. Take care!
she is not forgiving you for this one
So cozy is stuck in some kind of death loop in her mind caused by discord ?