• Member Since 4th May, 2013
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Estee


On the Sliding Scale Of Cynicism Vs. Idealism, I like to think of myself as being idyllically cynical. (Patreon, Ko-Fi.)

Comments ( 165 )

For everypony else, there was Sex Court.

Dun dun!

This has been added to
The Triptych Continuum Rebooted group
Unassigned folder

This may change when (if) it is completed

:trollestia:

Ponies experimented.... Experiments went wrong.

Just ask Dr Frankenstein

:pinkiehappy:

Class action suit brought by the parents of Ponyville that have been forced to give their children the talk after witnessing Rainbow’s courtships? Or bored afternoon?

"....The bakery just wants its sugar back!"

Uhm....considering where it's been I would NOT want it back. Not now, not ever, NEVER! I would ask to be paid for it.

:twilightoops:

:rainbowlaugh: Oh I am going to love that series! :rainbowlaugh:
And it's off to a great start.

This complement the Triptych-verse so well.

Tickets and season pass! :rainbowlaugh:

This series is great because you can bring so many side characters here for one-shots and not just the mane six.

Rainbow being a regular make a lot of sense.

Every single terrible sex pun hidden amongst the normal prose was like a hidden gem. I hated every one of them and eagerly, gleefully sought out the next. It’s glorious.

I await the inevitable Princess Chapter with delight.

I wondered how you were going to bring Twilight into this and you delivered.

:rainbowlaugh:Hate fuck break. :rainbowlaugh:

Judge Impassi Hearstoppper reviewed her notes. The steely gaze (rendered by steel-hued irises) went over the summations, line by merciless line. Both plaintiff and defendant attempted to evaluate her expression, trying to figure out how the judgment was about to go.

Hearstoppper? Well, better than Cadance/Cadence. Speaking of our alicorn of love, is she the final authority, or is it still the diarchy?

And this was just too easy to visualize! Yeah, Rainbow and her athletic gyrations. Just too humorous! :rainbowlaugh: :trollestia:

Da! DA! Ye olde Twi-Trix cat fight! I love it! :heart: :heart: :heart:

I'm fuckin' dying :rainbowlaugh: I hope you're ready to explain my COD to my grandmother :rainbowlaugh:

At this rate, the student Dragons amongst others are going to have some extensive court time. Between near indestructible, normal, expected and possibly excessively abused size differences and changes and absolutely nothing to do in the dragonlands but the geography and each other, it might be considered theyd have the greatest count of experiments? Which results so often in losses in non dragon, partners, especially if abilities swerve towards certain comic story abilities.

A dragon can quite literally state they have their eye on you? :trixieshiftright: Or get over a broken heart?:moustache:

"There's this stunt I've been working on," Rainbow promptly said. "If you bring in the blackboard this time, I can draw up some diagrams --"

Somewhere in the back there's a list of phrases Rainbow likes to say. If you guess which ones she'll use this time, you get a prize!

So is this not cannon to Tryptych because Trixie and Twilight generally don't like each other? Or are they just fighting because they had bad sex?

Well this could get interesting. I wonder how kinky Pinkie’s is going to get.

There will be a rise, alright.

Wait is this based off of that Playboy show? Even has basically the same name.

There is a fic around here called Judge Luna.

....let’s just keep Judge Heartstopper presiding this courtroom, yes?

This is amazing on more levels than I'm comfortable recounting. Thank you for it. I can only imagine how the rest of the Bearers might get involved.

I cannot articulate through text how much I love this.

I love how creative this is in its horniness. Keep it up! :twilightsheepish:

"Hate Fuck Break", huh? :trixieshiftright::twilightangry2: Sounds awfully plausible!

And yeah, this is some clever and creative stuff. I hope you've got more coming soon!

New headcanon accepted.

Especially "hate fuck break."

BTW, and I'm sure you knew this, the existence of Hinny of the Hills (and the insult 'mule') certainly implies that ponies and donkeys have been getting it on for a while.
(Spoilered because I could)

"I saw the sacks collapse, just before the screaming started and the world went white and sticky and full of lumps which took three days to wash out! The bakery just wants its sugar back!"

It sounds like the bakery already got its sugar back, if not in the form it would have preferred.

11619479
Uhm ....Google Why do reptiles have 2 penises. Yes, you CAN break it.

:pinkiegasp:

This... This certainly is a thing. A thing indeed...

I do not know if this would be the sort of thing that would end up in a small(?) claims civil court like this, but I wonder if a pony with a flexible physique and even more flexible morals (Cloudkicker?) could end up before Judge Heartstopper as part of a class action lawsuit by food-poisoned changedlings for "operating an unlicensed catering service" and "failing food safety inspections"

11619368
At this point, Rainbow's Wonderbolts salary is probably 50% garnished just to pay off the fines. And it's only at 50% because it legally can't go any higher, because she's racking them up faster than they're paid off.

You wrote this just to get all the lewd puns out of your system, didn't you?

...not that I'm complaining, being too busy laughing :rainbowlaugh:

This fic exceeded my expectations is every way possible :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

This whole thing has been hilarious

This, this right here, is how you do comedy.

It was almost impossible to keep a courthouse from radiating pure intimidation. That quality seemed to be embedded into the mere concept of such a structure, lurking until it found a way to express itself through cold marble and harsh lines. The architects tried to moderate the effects, for some were innocent and needed to be reassured accordingly... but it always came out in the end. The vast majority of those who approached the central courthouse in Canterlot would find themselves shivering slightly when they first grazed its aura, for something within them recognized the emanation of You Done Fucked Up.
Or, for a number of those whose knock-kneed approach was reluctantly advancing on Sex Court, You Done Fucked Something.

Estee. Don't ever let anyone tell you you're a bad writer1. THIS is what keeps me coming back. I can't puts words to it beyond "your words (Horse or otherwise) are a balm to my weary soul".

1:Not even yourself.

"They bought their tickets. They knew what they were getting into. I say, let 'em crash!"
-- Airplane! :derpytongue2:

P.S. It's actually "ungulate" rather than "ungluate", but that's the only error I've spotted.

Only in Estee's Equestria. And we're gonna need a pic of that judge.

Typo: Heartstoppper should be Heartstopper

A useful spell, just formulated a little incorrectly.

Fifty? That is a rather high estimate...

The near-exact opposite of Fifty Shades: Not only did you do the research, it's a healthy relationship.

Ponies dreamed about sleeping on a Cumulus. Having sex while atop one was an equally common vision. Princess Luna claimed that the total for both nightscape scenes had been eclipsed by those who simply saw themselves falling into the required pile of bits, but she was considered to be something of a biased source.

"I wish I had enough money for the world's most powerful computer."
"Why? What would you do with it?"
"I don't want the computer; I just want that much money."

In any case, I imagine pegasi have an easier time than most in falling on the mercy of the court. Especially when there's such a soft landing pad available. Let's just hope the mattress company doesn't find out; I'm pretty sure this doesn't play nice with that NDA.

Funny coincidence that this was posted the same day as this post crossed my feed elsewhere.

The defendant said nothing. He didn't move. He didn't twitch.

Or perhaps he had. Nopony could really tell.

Is it bad my first thought was 'full body cast'? I guess that might be the result of one of Rainbow's escapades...

To the happy couple! If their relationship survived this, it'll survive anything.

For the frequency of their appearances alone, there were a few of the expert witnesses who effectively qualified as regulars. Attorneys tended to pass around lists of those who would be willing to speak on a client's behalf and in any case, there were only so many ponies who truly knew about certain subjects. Those who would step into the witness stall to explain, in careful, common terms, exactly what had gone wrong. And some were simply authorities in established categories of sexual interest. Because things happened when ponies came up with the entirely new and chose to experiment -- but civil cases also arose when somepony viewed a known path for the first time and decided to get experiment al .

Late 1940s, the Kinsey reports on human sexuality was ground breaking.

A BIG criticism is that "The subjects were not chosen randomly.". (Mostly male prostitutes & jailed sex offendors.)

Oh & according to Kinsey the LGBTGQ+ was only about 1&1/2% of the population.

:twilightoops:

Two cases in one chapter! And the first case sets up the theme!

The pegasus at the plaintiff's station was rather pretty. Her coat was the streaked grey-white of a cloud which was moving towards storm

I was worried she was gonna be angry, but no, she's sad and desperate!

The situation slightly reminds me of https://www.fimfiction.net/story/51991/flash-fog, given the heavy cloud.

Awww! They're still together! And Impassi's giving them some privacy!

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