• Member Since 24th Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago

Goldfur


I'm a science-fiction and fantasy buff, creator of the Chakat Universe, and now dabbling in the MLP:FiM universe. I love a good story!

T
Source

This story is a sequel to Mark My Words


One moment, Caleb was strolling in the cool evening air of the Las Vegas desert, then a rogue portal dumped him into an Equestrian desert and left him stranded in an unfamiliar universe. When attempts to return fail, he has to start his life anew. Willow Branch, a sympathetic earth pony mare, offers to help him learn the ways of his new world.

The prologue to this story can be read in the "Mark My Words" chapter – "Unexpected Company".

Chapters (12)
Comments ( 259 )

Better human in Equestria, than Equestrian in earth...
Here they dont do shit to you...

O,o this is going to be a awesome story.
i love the art work as you have the size of the pony close to what i feel it should be.

Crazy that none of them spotted that can. I guess the sun was just not at right angle to glint off it.

10941337
It had fallen right into the middle where no direct light hit it. Believe me, as someone who has a large garden to care for, it's a lot easier than you think for stuff to disappear from sight.

10941347
and yet some how i have a feeling that this can will show up agene in the story.:twilightsmile:

10941372
That would be you knowing the principle of "Chekov's Gun"

I somehow doubt this hooman will get as interesting a life as Mark. For his continued happiness, I believe.

Sadly, none of them noticed the almost empty beer can lodged in the middle branches of a nearby bush where it had landed after Caleb had dropped it as he fell out of the portal.

This is either cocking the Chekhov's Gun or Red Herring'ing. I wonder which.

Are there two Allurias or was that misspelling?

Mmmmm, been looking forward to this. Another angle on the Mark-verse is welcome.

In vino veritas, but beer woulda worked too!

Caleb stared at her for a long moment before shaking his head and suppressing a chuckle. “Biased much?”

Just a tad :trollestia:

The mare poked him in the chest with her hoof. “Of course. I bet I could drink you under the table.”

Caleb smirked. “Now I know you’re military. Okay, you’re on.”

Isn't that how you got into this mess :trixieshiftright:

Sadly, none of them noticed the almost empty beer can lodged in the middle branches of a nearby bush where it had landed after Caleb had dropped it as he fell out of the portal.

All I could think about was this :trollestia:

10941347
But it should still have a faint magical signature from the portal, right? Unless it was just washed out by the larger signal from where the portal once was. I'm surprised none of the unicorns there thought to cast some kind of "locate non-desert stuff" spell, like a more general version of Rarity's gem-finding spell. That is a thing in this continuity, right?

10941767

But it should still have a faint magical signature from the portal, right?

No. It's a very non-magical item. The dimensional frequency is entirely different thing. As for a detection spell, most unicorns don't have anything more sophisticated than telekinesis and anything specifically related to their special talent. Everything else needs to be specially learned. Exact Point (and other unicorn searchers) was given the specific portal detection spell just for this job. Only mages like Twilight are versatile with spells.

10941513

Are there two Allurias or was that misspelling?

Oops. Wrote her name down twice. Fixed now.

I am curious will this involve extensively your other character's from your other story? (Ps...I know it's a sequel.)
Hoping it's a little more of a stand alone(personally, did not enjoy as much your later half of the last work, but! I love your writing and character work?) So...figured I would ask before I dipped my toes in as where.

Thank you!

Ppps. Inspite of what I said. Knowing that someone out there has built such a monolith of work's all about warm kind hearted folk's learning their way in the world is...well beautiful! :twilightsmile:

Another good story in the making...

Enjoyed the story so far. Looking forward to see more! :D

10941853
Ah, okay, that makes sense. I keep forgetting that most unicorns aren't actually OP.

10941287

Better human in Equestria, than Equestrian in earth...
Here they dont do shit to you...

Yep--they absolutely WON'T do shit to you...

They'll make YOU DO IT ALL TO YOURSELF!
camo.fimfiction.net/lv4ZwEdmpP_pafihOoKGSNyZW0UTgVjBFwhCMv12cvo?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2FMark-pole.png
camo.fimfiction.net/NrqHEWcshxJDzilf3dzai2i5EAytbmWbrsXquoQY99E?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Flanding.png
camo.fimfiction.net/vqa5O9Zcrge0IuMWvr5_ZDxCC3ixZM9pwg8dGow0MUw?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Ffountainfolly.png
camo.fimfiction.net/h1O0XYdlfpKREJ1_HOlGk7qburVmx08PfQAmXkFoZK0?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Ffeast.png
camo.fimfiction.net/AfIBlxl5CzinCZ6YbDqQ0gGKu3r7UkH6g3ltu71Dgec?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Faircrash.png
camo.fimfiction.net/S7-oJA_AKR2-KeeuRVlpCKElYPW8CbnEC5LUld2NUjs?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Fbowlblunder.png
camo.fimfiction.net/xKYO14UCXIj0uhTzATBsA2s5IPihqEx4yenlFoup8lg?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Fsplat.png camo.fimfiction.net/BypmPGemuQeY4-Rt9SuinoTQo2lzQbhlp7V3Mv3hDq0?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Ftreed.png
camo.fimfiction.net/S-FDfnjvKbv4i3DcO47cZfJEOPA0Z2FmQoTQF2hC8gU?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2FItsScience.png wait... how did that one get in there!? :twilightoops::facehoof:
OY! PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE COLINDAR!! :twilightangry2:
camo.fimfiction.net/pgEr3SHoZz9Duip9fsLVS9oxWZ-5FC8r9pX5Vvovw0I?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Flab_hug4.png



Although, there is just the remotest possibility that IF, beyond ALL probability and any and all expectations, you somehow inexplicably manage to survive doing something so utterly monumentally stupid.... :trollestia:
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Comment posted by Kevin Lee deleted August 18th

Dear god those prequels...

Screw it i didn't plan on sleeping anyway

Very nice. You should probably do a blog post for "Mark my Words" linking this story. I don't think I would have seen it if it weren't featured.

10941910
Once Caleb gets established, I will be taking him away from Canterlot and most of the main characters in the Mark-verse. That's why it's being written as a separate story rather than part of "Mark My Words". Caleb and Willow are the focus of the story.

Calling it now. He learns to live with it and gets offered to go home but declines.

Chekhov's gun is smoking! :pinkiehappy:

Another great chapter! Very nice of Mark and family to gently introduce Caleb to life in Equestria by the family having a conversation and dinner with him. Hope that Caleb and WIllow have an enjoyable evening going out to have some beers together!

Very nice chapter. It seems the distraction of magic is doing a fine job of keeping him from focusing too much on what he's lost.
I noticed a couple typos on my way through this one.

My wife continued like she . . .

Most of the rest of this chapter is in third person, this one paragraph slipped into Mark's POV.

VIPs as far as I’m concerned, Twilight replied cheerfully

Missing a closing quotation before Twilight.
I'm looking forward to the next chapter.

“May I see that?” Caleb asked. Allura levitated it over to the man and his eyebrows rose. “Iron Man? You know that this is science fiction armor, right?”

"Any sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from super high technology"--Hoofer C. Clarke

10948322
Fixed, thanks! Looks like it's going to be hard not to use first person while writing two different stories simultaneously.

Of course humans have a clothing fetish, bare skin (or the very light hairs that remain) don't provide any insulation to any weather ... then again, having (overworking?) sweat glans ...

Great chapter. Very unexpected end. Caleb will learn boner control when female antros start tunning around him.

Why can I picture Caleb being brought back to the castle across Willow's back? Beer, thy comfort leads to issues.

10948381
We exchanged fur for sweat glands to improve our endurance over long distances. That's a big part of how our hunter-gatherer ancestors were able to become apex predators.

Caleb thought that was a strange way of phrasing it. Perhaps she meant her castle staff?

No :trollestia:

“May I see that?” Caleb asked. Allura levitated it over to the man and his eyebrows rose. “Iron Man? You know that this is science fiction armor, right?”

Yeah, but it's not really fiction in this world anymore due to Grogar and his cohorts having stuff like that.
I'd imagine that some of it was salvaged so it's likely that some reverse-engineering is going on :moustache:

Caleb slumped back in his chair. “I’m going to need an aspirin or two to deal with all this.”

Juuuust roll with it, you'll save a lot of Bits on aspirin like that :moustache:

As he headed to the bathroom, the human wondered how a species could regard wearing normal clothes as a fetish. Several minutes later, the two left his new quarters and headed into town.

I'd imagine it's similar to how some clothes are designed to make one look more scandalous than if they were naked :moustache:

Caleb is going to have so much to get use to in the next few months. and at the same time he is going to do so much better then at his home.

the Iron Mare art work is awesome.

10942009

Yep--they absolutely WON'T do shit to you...

They'll make YOU DO IT ALL TO YOURSELF!
camo.fimfiction.net/86wvCnqnFaDeYCyHUo8IlHR--8a5ye9tgm4C3e2SSVo?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chakat.net%2FPony%2Faircrash.png

Kinky, didn't know mark swung that way. 😎

Monk
"Yes, I will eat the Fear Turkey." -Illua

“We are Iron Mare!”

Ever since that story with a Guard ending up getting a changeling for an armor set, I've been waiting for this to happen.

I mean, Twiggy's the only tamed timberwolf. Let's not confuse Caleb about what timberwolves are really like.

Great lore chapter. So they dont have Thestral traits?
Night vision? Silent flying? Teeth to suck juices out of fruits etc.?

Huh, a three-to-one sex ratio. That tells me that their Y chromosomes work a bit differently from ours, and XY individuals of their species still express primarily female traits. That also means that their Y chromosomes contain all the essential information that is absent in the human version. I wonder if XX and XY mares differ slightly in appearance or behavior? Dangit, now I need to go see if anyone's written a full research paper about the sexual genetics of magical equines.

Welcome to the Twilight Zone, Calab! :rainbowlaugh::twilightoops:

10949831

Oh, I remember that story. That drone was genius.


I think one of three comic giant had same idea long ago... and then there was shapeshifter from Sector General... and then was my Startrek universe changeling acting as emergency vaccsuit which idea rolled through fandom..

10953407

They have same XY mechanism in genes.
In case of earth horses, it's less DNA-based and more related to process of creation cells as studies show. the older is mare or stallion, the less viable cells which would give a male offspring. But horses aren't naturally evolved species, they spent 40k+ year being bred and selectioned by humans. Some species show opposite dynamics.

considering how many other species are around now I don't think they would be stressing everypony, kinda speciest.

and seems the Brew family expanded

Willow nudged him. “Everypony !” she said in a hoarse whisper.

Even now when there are more creatures than ponies around that word is still a thing? :trixieshiftright:

Willow shrugged. “Aside from a hoofful like the mare we met along the way, you won’t find a town full of ponies more accepting of strangers than Ponyville.

And yet you use "everypony" which can be seen as a minor insult... sorry if my focus on that one word annoy anyone.

It's just, in this modern day Equestria, even more so for Ponyville, there are far more non-ponies around than there used to be and you'd think words that only refers to ponies would be used less, or that at he very least no one would mind if you used words like "everyone" and "anyone".


Don't know why I am so focused on this one detail, but I am :applejackunsure:

10955522
Three reasons why Willow insists on "everypony" instead of "everyone":
1. The patrons were all ponies at that time (or if there was a griffon or other race there, she had not noticed).
2. "Everypony" was the polite form of the word for centuries and changes to common speech can be generational.
3. Willow is not perfect. I am not trying to write a character who always gets things right. She is as flawed as Caleb although in different ways. She will try to teach him to be more pony-like rather than give a broader viewpoint. Just because she can "love and tolerate" other species doesn't mean she wants to be like them.

10955142
considering how many other sexualities are around I don't think people would be stressing or dehumanising them for a act of nature.

10957237
Again everypony even though multiple races

Time travel! Send Caleb back to when the portal was still open, wait for past Caleb to arrive and move out of sight, then future Caleb leaves. No changes to history, and as a bonus, Caleb returns to Earth right after he left and doesn't have to explain being missing for several days.

Twilight: (stamps a hoof) "What have I told you all?"
Everycreature: "Time travel is a problem, not a solution."

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