Private Steven Clint is a man with nothing. A 35-year old soldier who had the rare experience of losing both his wife and daughter while he was overseas in Afghanistan. The armband on his right bicep with Scootaloo's face on it serves as a reminder of the daughter he lost, for in Scootaloo's face he saw her own.
While patrolling a small Afghan town after a bombing, Steve ventures into the alley to find a sight he never thought he would. The same small, orange filly that was on his arm. The same on that reminded him of his daughter.
Now he must protect her from the surrounding war until she finds a way to get home.
A special thanks to "RainbowdashEpicness" for helping me edit this story.
Also, if anyone is interested in making an image that I can use as a cover picture (besides this one which I got off google images), let me know.
I hope you enjoy :)
I'll read it later but......
..... Why the hell is Scootaloo in Afghanistan?
Sounds vaguely like My Little Dashie... I'll try it.
Excellent. There are a few scuffs here and there, mainly typos and a few grammar mistakes, but besides that, really good. It's rare that I read something outside of the featured box, but I'm glad I read this. I'm going to recommend this to my friend. He is not a brony.
moar plox
Pretty good, I find this interesting. My one question is why does he have an MP5? Those are normally only issued to pilots and special forces. Normally the more common weapon is the M4 Carbine, or the M16A3/A4 Rifle.
Other than that small bit (And sorry for my mini-rant), I approve!
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra.png
You have made Lyra happy.
871875
Thanks for the heads up. I'm not big on military knowledge so I appreciate the help.
I'll edit the gun name so it's more accurate. Thanks again
871531 Could you please show me examples? As, I'm editing this, er well helping him edit it, as he put it, and I plan to take up a profession in editing. So, likewise any help would be appreciated so I could improve my editing skills. Thanks!
dahm i didnt get first post o well this is good i really like it
872162
Those mistakes are probably my fault. Remember I changed a few things up.
You managed to create some strong emotions inside me, so much that I got goosebumps at one point. I like it.
I love this fucking story. Keep the good stuff coming bro
872203 Is there gonna be any sniping? If so, might I recommend an M40A1 Bolt Action rifle loaded with 7.62×51mm NATO rounds.
this is good keep up the great work
873407 no the m24 is the standard army sniper my friend.
873484 I honestly prefer the M40A1. It's the first rifle I ever used. I used it at a shooting range, and I liked it.
873490i was saying the M24 cause it's the standard issue for the army, but the M40A1 is a very nice gun.
:C no plz tell me when the next chapter comes cuz i cant stand cliffhangers
Hehw, I know what happens in the 3rd chapter, er well most of what happens.
Fantastic! I've found another of your stories that I plan to read until the end!
Good job.I definitely want to see more chapters.
This is what you were doing after the other story?
Holy fuck do I ever like this. Track'd and fav'd. Let's see where this one goes.
871438
It's magic. I ain't gotta explain shit.
871531
Cool. Glad you liked it enough to send it to a non-brony.
873407>>873484
Thanks for the advice regarding sniper rifles. I actually will think about working in a sniping scene now that you suggested it (perhaps a bit like "The Hurt Locker", but I'm not sure)
874361
Awesome, always happy to have you follow my stories man
874865
This story was actually an idea I've had for a while (like when I was still writing my "Human Elements" story, but I only decided to go through with writing it recently. Glad to hear that you're liking it.
879348 Yes, now I have to decide exactly how I want to proceed for my own story. Chapter Two was quite interesting and all, but there is STILL so much left unsaid. I also need to figure out which of the Elements of Harmony is/are gonna turn traitor. Not to mention the internal struggles, the power plays, and the realization that true friends wont abandon you... and I've still gotta find a way to bring in Pinkie Pie's other side, Pinkamina, into all of this
Not to mention the Marines and Spetsnaz. I swear I'm getting too far in over my head for this story. So many ideas tumbling around in my mind and I have zero idea what to do with them all, so they all make sense once typed up.
....
....
....
And I totally just gave away too much info, didn't I? I think its time for me to go to sleep.
This story has some serious potential. I dig.
His comment about it being an MP5 is correct.
This reminds me of a hero of war
Sad, but great story. Look forward to the rest.
879348 To say about snipers... Well I'd suggest just a standard Barrett 50.cal Since that tends to be a standard equipped sniper.
902207 According to the Geneva Convention, you aren't allowed to use .50 caliber rounds on people. They are used for covering fire (suppressing fire) and as anti-armor rounds. Something tells me you play too much CoD...
913641 No, I'm basing it off of when it was majorly used during wwii
914373 My bad mate. I was in kinda a bad mood earlier, so sorry about that. Anyway, I find it ridiculous that the military spends $40 for a single bullet that they can't even use on people.
914580 Hey, don't sweat being mad. xD. Everypony gets pissed sometime! Sides, I do infact play CoD a lot so, you were right about that!
914596 Alright, let's not blow the author's notifications up with a conversation. So, bye for now.
914860 I'm on good terms with him, so I don't think he'll rage but, BYEZ! As you can see I quote "A special thanks to "RainbowdashEpicness" for helping me edit this story." Proves our, somewhat, good terms.
914873 Did not see that. If you ever need help editing this story (Or, author-man-lady-being, since you're reading this, if YOU ever need help editing) I'd be happy to help to the best of my abilities. And they go beyond just 'spell-check' ( the application).
I noticed two errors.
'I haven’t laughed in months, and wasn’t going to start here, in a small down that had been bombed only a little while before.'
Is that 'down' meant to be 'town'?
"“Let’s check out the alley.” Charlie suggested, pointing to a small alley in-between the two buildings that were right near the site of the explosion.
“No man, it’s too risky.” Charlie answered, “Besides, if there’s a bomb, it’s more likely to be in the street than an alley.”'
Charlie having a conversation with himself?
Other than that, fantastic first chapter.
915967 Now your making me look bad....
Ah, very nice ending. Cant wait for your own intake on Scoot's parents. And I feel an encompassing urge to buck Butch in the face.
Awwww... You're going make Scootaloo break my heart about her parents aren't you?
Yay you updated! also great chapter.
You know, being stuck in an active battlefield like this'll give Scoots a lot of trauma.
Keep going.
Yay, I've been recognized :D
Here.
This is perfect for sad backstories.
You updated!
This was a really sad chapter. Very well written. Keep up the fantastic work!
937517
Gotta have one arrogant SOB lol.
937658
...Maybe.
938102
Thanks!
938171
I shall
966156:
>tfw your comment just made the story darker
Daaaaaaaaah shit.
i will personally go to tom braddys house and steal that nigga's fridge