Well, let me start by saying that I will mainly be writing love stories! Being that it is my favorite genre of literature, I find it much easier to write. Of course I will get out of the comfy zone!
Swift Breeze, a pegasus pony, has lived his whole life in ponyville. One day he decides to take a break and relax a while on his small vacation from work. that is when he meets a mare, Rainbow Dash, at a Wonderbolts performance. Will this just be a new friendship between the two? Or will its spark a relationship between them?
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This looks promising, and Rainbow is my favorite pony, so I will definitely track it, good work so far!
Burnin' For You - Blue Oyster Cult
Alas, my friend was right.
There's no original ideas any more, no matter how hard you try.
Hi. You may not know my stories, but I just happened to see your story and noticed a couple of things about it. Not calling you out on it, just mentioning it cause I thought it was quite coincidental to my first story, The Long Life of Breeze Rider that I posted here on May 31st.
Your character is Swift Breeze. Mine was Breeze Rider.
I also have a section about a "Breeze of Love", and my character too has a crush on a pegasus pony, though in my case it was less apparent and it was Fluttershy.
And, at the end, I also had a separate married member of the main six to a created character, though in my case it was Applejack.
Not calling you out or anything, just pointing out the odd coincidences. (Or are they? Nah I'm kidding. Or am I?)
Have a read of my story if you like and I will see to trying to remember to read yours as you update. In my opinion though, after having written a couple long fics and a medium length one, that your story path may be moving a bit too quick and introducing things too fast with too little detail.
Apologies if that makes you mad. I'm not trying to make anyone mad. I'm just saying what people have said to me. I don't like fics that move too fast with the introductions, but I don't enjoy fics that shove all the plot into the last little bit either with nothing beforehand. I prefer a moderately spaced amount of introduction and progression, and from what I see in my comments and such, a lot of other reader like that too.
I hope this helped. If it didn't, then see fit to ignore this comment and delete it if you truly wish. Farewell for now.
756453
I thank you alot for your feedback. I have waited for some comments from people who are actually taking this seriously. I salute you good sir. My sister came up with the name, and I made up the title. I would agree things are moving a tad too fast, so I'll try to slow things down a bit. I will give your story a read, and I apologize for the inconvineance of the names and titles.
756702
Thank you. My spellcheck didn't catch that.
756758
No prob, I like the concept of the story also
looks like rarity and Aerohead have some bigness to attend to *wink wink*
756755
No need to apologize. There's no inconvenience due to the names. I just noticed and wanted to bring it to both our attentions.
Nice chapter
Great Job! I'm defiantly going to add this to one of my favorites, I think this could turn out to be an interesting fanfiction!
765481
Haha damn, without ou, I would make myself look like a fool. Thanks again!
766522 No Problem! I'm looking forwad to how this story is going to turn out!
Daww, that's all.
D'aaww.
And shame on them for trying to break them apart.
Another D'aaww worthy moment. Well done!
Great job! No spelling or grammar errors that I could catch.
So beautifully written...
Great job! Just wondering, is some action going to be incorperated in this story?
776807
What sorta action?
776807
Yes, but i dont know who though. I may put it in the story, but do you think I would need to change the rating. Or could I just put sexual content warnings? Idk. I may just make a whole new story that is just the 'action' sceens from my fics. What do you think?
777423
Thanks. I dont really read over my stories, but i guess that must be something I should do from now.
778416 making a whole new story wouldn't really end that well. And warnings would prob be good.
oh my. Aerohead, and Rarity....... lol XD
...........Aerohead got busy didn't he?
Nice. This is good
and I feel sorry for Rarity and Aero.
Poor Rarity...
This is some good stuff. Please continue.
Once again Beautiful writing although still quite a few spelling mistakes, and some grammar ones , also. Sadly, due to time issues I can't note them at the moment, but I will gladly when I wake up.
783876 783680 783104
Sorry for the shitty writing again. A wedding will arrive shortly. And the whole baby thing came from a friend, so that's not on me... Again sorry everypony
AAARGE.... too much daaaw mixed with and undertone of sadness..... brain melting..... soul burning........ too much...... (dramatic exsplostion)
R.I.P shadowless_night a brave soul who atempted to read ''Breeze of Love''. may his sacrifise be remembered and the warning his death imparts on us all be remembered, that too much daaw can be leathal exspecaly when it is also partialy sad. lest we forget
nice, I'm likeing the side story between aero and rarity, but then again I would since he's my OC.
but serously nicely done with breez and RD cant wait to see the rest. also shoot me a text man I lost your number
785034
Your soul and story shall live on, friend. Thanks for the comment
an OC/Dash shipfic? tracked!
snow-balls in her hand
ROFL! Should be hoof.
787629
right! I'm on it!
787520
Please, read on, friend. thanks!
787743
thanks. I'm getting really bad at missing this crap...
Also, note that I'm a pretty decent editor and I'd be glad to edit it before you post it, in terms of grammar and spelling.
791492
I'm gettin pretty bad at errors...
791508
that'd be great. I need an editor. send me your e-mail in a PM so I can send the chapter to you
791527 Is Skype ok? Since Skype is a bit more, practical in these terms.
Also, great chapter! Best one yet. :3
791581
i guess skype can work
791707
eeyup. thanks
Your spitting this shit out so quickly!
792111
is that bad
LAWL Dash is pregnant I wonder what the foals would be like?
Also i can help edit if its ok with you?
794400
I just got an editor today. But when ever he is not free, can I contact you? If so, you can send me your email in a PM
794461
Yea sure!
Great Job,
Short? but sweet maybe elab more