The average pony would be delighted to wake up and find an adorable little bundle of joy on their doorstep—even more so after having learned it's been delivered by Princess Celestia herself! Now, imagine that this new foal has been chosen by fate to save Equestria's future, and you have a scenario beyond any would-be parent's wildest dreams. How absolutely wonderful would that be?
On a related note, Twilight Sparkle is now a mother. She isn't happy about it.
Written for F*** This Prompt, because no way would I write something like this otherwise. Probably. I think.
Many thanks to Kamikakushi and Dubs Rewatcher for pre-reading.
Chapters (1)
You know, I always did wonder how Sunset Shimmer ended up in the castle, only to be tossed out when she hit puberty. I think I now have my answer.
What even
I'm surprised Twilight didn't ask to be put in a separate cell.
This was certainly something, different,
Magnificent
*Wants to compete in contest*
*Reads the amazing first entry*
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She got pawned off to Principal Celestia by Princess Celestia, who lied and said Sunset was a really, really, really big hamster? I like where this is going.
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How odd
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Equestria doesn't have any laws against sex in prison, so... there's that.
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Hi, Biased. Nice to meet you.
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They do say that variety is the spice of life!
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Thank ya, sah.
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Don't worry—there's always second place, you know!
Edit: Ugh, this joke feels really mean, but I'm leaving it in. Sorry, Link.
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But how else are you going to tell if it's full of angry Greeks?
Oh wait, not that relevant to this story. Still silly.
This was the song I imagined playing from the radio.
Excellent way to end a hilarious little story; this had me on the floor laughing.
Sweet baby Jesus...
Now, I could ask why the flip Celestia steals babies and tried to give one to Twilight...but that would be missing the point. In other words, this is funny.
I... I don't even...
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I don't give a damn, I want answers.
I have So many questions I don't even know how to start
10/10 would bang
What
what
why are the Princesses kidnapping foals
why did they blame Twilight and Rarity
why did purity go to prison with them
why the seventh element
so many questions unanswered
so little time
6594173 you stole the words right out of my mouth.
…wtf did i just read?
This feels like an arrow of snark aimed directly at the author of the Winningverse. I think I love you.
Luna was running out of "children of the night" again wasn't she?
What. The. Fuck.
I... I just... I don't even...
I just can't. No. Everything about this is wrong. Rarity and Twilight? Just what? What were Celestia and Luna even doing. I just...
Fuck. I can't even... Just fuck.
6592069 get yourself a dragonite?
Sorry I had to
omg yes 10/10 it would have gotten a 8 but the ending gave it the extra 2
no, No, NOOOO!!!!!
No more Raritwi shipping, no more!!!!
I need pictures of Raridash IMEDIATELY!!!!!
Soz
Well done, Mesa.
The only foals that pop out of thin air are Draconequus ones. So where the hay did Celly and Lulu....
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....Aw, fudge.
Is this suppose to be funny because I see what you're trying to do,but most characters in this are OOC. If this was a dream it would be funny.but jeez Im not seeing the punchline
I like it, everything make perfect sense
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Almost thought Celestia was trying to pawn off her own foal after a bit of fun with some guards.
What did i just read, and wait, is fluttertshy in jail also?
6592069 Yes, that is the human equivalent of what Celestia tried to pass her off as.
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Blazu! I put words in the computer and good things happened. It's a miracle!
I feel like the resons that they were taking babies was a wasted opportunity for a very good punchline
amusing. xD nice work.
OK who let the princesses get in to evidence room this time? Wait what do you mean they was last seen fleeing a maturity ward with how many. ........oh blo.........you know what I quit!
So, because I had a few hours to burn, I finally read it.
Now, some part of me is still going nuts, screaming for answers.
Yet some other part of me isn't even vaguely suprised. Maybe because I primed my brain first with another fic.
Great writing, though the plot was nonsensical, it was consistant. You still entirely blow me out of the water in the writing department.
The story in the end made far too little sense to me, though.
I have no idea what just happened, so I'm going to pretend none of it happened.
Hmm, you seem like a complete jackass from most of the forum discussions I spot you in. So I'm like, "Let's check said jackass out." Now after reading a little one shot I must digress, your a complete jackass that can write some decent horse words at least.
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*you're
What? I've apparently got a reputation to maintain, right?
But seriously, thanks for the compliment. Oh, and thanks for saying I write decently, too.
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I'd expect no less.
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This was bucking nonsense.
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Sequel, please
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I can't promise anything, but if I write a sequel, it would probably be about Purity taking control of the prison gang before trading Twilight and Rarity to Fluttershy in exchange for a pack of contraband pacifiers.
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Add in Sunbutt as tge leader of a rival gang for more shenanigans
I wish I could tell you that Fluttershy fought the good fight, and the Sisters let her be. I wish I could tell you that, but Ponyville is no fairy-tale world. She never said who gave her all those cute little homeless, deformed kitties. But we all knew.
This was fantastic 😻 Yet again Twilight is left to clean up Celestia's messes like it was nothing.