• Member Since 5th Feb, 2012
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cleverpun


Defund the Police, Black Lives Matter | A teacher, student, writer, and opinionated reader. Responsible for the cleverpun's Critique Corner review series: http://tinyurl.com/h3ftsm3

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Twilight is practicing her latest spell; one that let's her read the minds of other ponies!

She asks Pinkie to help, since nothing could possibly go wrong. I mean, it's not like Twilight could mess up the spell, causing Pinkie's mental patterns and memories to infect Twilight's mind; that would just be silly! And even if that did happen, Pinkie would help her friend reverse the effects.

...Wouldn't she?


Image by the ever-amazing mysticalpha, used with permission.

Thanks to SonicBrony for proofreading.

Fanart! (:pinkiegasp:); Think Pink by applecream

Google Docs version.

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 115 )

OK, I know I promised I wouldn't do this anymore, but:
“Twilight, are super-duper sure this is a good idea?"
A missing word? In the first sentence? :derpytongue2:

This was ... strange. Funny and entertaining but strange.
Essentially Twilight mind-rapes herself.
(Is it mind-rape if you do it to yourself? Forced mind-fapping?)
Anyway, there is a whole strata of untapped DARK under that funny pink.
Pinkie Pie has years of experience with being herself, I wonder if Twinkie Pie Sparkle has any mental middle gears.
And if there is a Twinkamina Sparkle... Oh boy, let's not go there...

That's... dark. The "tragedy" tag is well-earned.

... Tracking.

just think of it, a world full of PINKIEs
it would be so AWESOME :rainbowkiss:

Oh, no! The Pink Assimilation Wave it's coming, Run for the hills! No wait, the Pinkies are probably already there, there is no place to hide in Equestria...
Maybe a way out of the planet, then again they already got Twilight and Pinkie probably has dozens of contraptions stashed for emergencies all over.
Quick! Everypony! Out of the Universe! But if the 4th wall isn't good enough of a barrier...
Well, horse****, everypony, it was a pleasure having free will, get ready for the pink eternal party because :pinkiecrazy: will assimilate all existence.

You know the concept of this story makes me think of one line of a game that i played recently: "Aren't you scared of just, being turned into someone else?"

This is totally gonna end up scaring me for life. But i don't care this interests me.
r21.imgfast.net/users/2116/33/57/24/avatars/8-44.jpg
Let the party begin! :pinkiehappy:

I'm kinda expecting whatevers left of Twilight's (If anything's left) mind to try and fight back Twinkie's dominance and something bad happens. Maybe explaining the Tragedy tag.

In my head when i read:

“Be… Pinkie…” She whispered softly to herself.
And when she opened her eyes that’s who she was; Twinkie Pie Sparkle. Who she’d always been.

I pictured her eyes changing to Pinkie color.

Oh, silly Pinkie Pie!
No, you didn't, you forked it up royally and now it'll turn ... say it!
:pinkiegasp: : ... into an enormously huge entire-town-in-total-chaos Princess-has-to-come-and-save-the-day problem.
That's right!
You better start writing to Celestia right now, because I can see Twinkie and Pinkity running off down the path to Fluttershy's cottage.:fluttershysad:

As much fun as this concept is, that Tragedy tag keeps scaring me off. Why can't we explore these concepts without it ending horribly?

1080218

I feel that way about dark tags.

I like to think that tragedy can apply to social and mental ruin, not just physical. Plus I'm enough of an optimist that I prefer even "bad" endings to have a reasonable level of positive interpretation available. The FIM universe runs on optimism, so hopefully the ending I have planned will be reasonable but not depressing

1080463 1080218

In the old greek sense the tragedy was a story of inevitable outcomes and the futile fight of the protagonists against the fates. Modern conceptions of tragedy have turned it into an "everyone dies horribly" sort of thing, but true tragedy can be as simple as two friends being permanently driven apart by a difference of opinion. The loss of the mind is a very basic human fear, and a story exploring that loss would qualify as tragic, even if the outcome is largely positive, because fate or the gods changed the world and the protagonists were powerless to stop it.

Interesting that you aren't just going to return to the status quo at the end. I like that. :pinkiehappy:

I'm just gonna take a guess here. Are they slowly turning into complete Pinkie's? Is the next chapter gonna have Twilight's cutie mark be replaced by Pinkie's balloons?

I think that's what's gonna happen later on and Pinkie's gonna feel real bad about it.

1080640

An apt summary! I think of tragedy in the "character is defeated by their own flaws" sense, and in that respect this story is definitely a tragedy; the main 6 have no shortage of flaws, even if canon sometimes treats that fact very lightly.

1080670

My original draft had Pinkie's cutie mark overlaying Twilight's after a certain point in the plot, but this seemed like overkill to me. Since getting a cutie mark is basically puberty, it doesn't seem logical that it would happen twice; puberty can't really be a psychosomatic condition, and once you've gone through it you can't really repeat it.

It's nice to see mind magic being explored for a change. It's odd that almost no one writes about it considering how common it is in Equestria (Want It Need It, Cutie Mark Pox, CMC's love potion, Discorded ponies, the Elements of Harmony).

As far as Pinkie goes, she's seems like one of those personalities that would be particularly effective, for better or for worse, with mind magic. In particular the episodes Briddle Gossip and Luna Eclipsed showed that she's good at inspiring fear in ponies. And the fact that she thinks it's fun had some potentially bad implications.

Anyway, I like what you've got so far, could use some more black comedy, but otherwise it's great.

1080463
1082050
Sounds like you know what you're doing.

1082050You've got a good point but still in like Rarity's case, if i'm thinking about this right wouldn't that make her special talent kinda mute? I don't know what other word to put it in but she wouldn't want to do her talent anymore but instead do Pinkie's. :unsuresweetie: It's kinda making me confused.

1082208

I like to think I know what I'm doing, but good to hear it from someone else :twilightsmile:

1082886

Their previous memories and abilities are still there even if it's been mixed with Pinkie's. Rarity can still sew and detect gems, so even if Pinkie's mental patterns make her want to do other things, she hasn't necessarily lost her other skills.

Further, a cutie mark doesn't define a pony- Rarity's special talent/cutie mark is finding gems, but her occupation is sewing, so gaining new skills wouldn't change your cutie mark anyway. You might argue losing your skills would cause something, like from amnesia, but that's beyond the scope of this story.

This is merely my interpretation, but hopefully that cleared things up a bit?

1083910
MLP: Friendship is PINK :twilightoops:

There's probably some slice of life, black comedy fun to be had in a world full of Pinkie-ponies (Rarity loses all her contracts because her dresses are based on carnivals, Fluttershy freaks out every animal she meets, Dash becomes even more reckless...) but a little too dark for me.

Thanks for the picture though, I lol'd :rainbowlaugh:

1083554 Thanks i don't quite understand it all but, i understand enough of it. :pinkiecrazy: Either way i think i know how this story is gonna play out.

With Pinkie regretting she did all of this then she asks Twilight to change them back to normal but Twilight won't do it and Pinkie breaks into tears. :unsuresweetie: I'm not really expecting a happy ending.

But i'll keep reading anyway because this story is keeping my interest. :yay:

...they got spike too? Awe man not Spike! Poor little thing...

At least Pinkie finally figured out that having more than one of you is a Bad thing. Hope it works out for all of them ...

Glad that Pinkie finally realized that forcing your will upon others is wrong. Also looks like Celestia may be resisting to some effect. Let's hope Pinkie and Luna can stop this.

I hope Pinkie and Luna remember the universal backup plan.

It's easy to remember, as it's only one word.

RUN!!

Comparing Pinkie to Discord? Low blow, Luna, low blow.:trixieshiftleft:

1108799 It might not be the nicest comparison but Discord did say that she was his favorite element... I can really picture a fic where they defeat Discord by giving his powers to Pinkie. If it works for Celestia ceding control of the sun and Equestria to Twilight why wouldn't it for Discord?

1111806 I meant the ending to the chapter. If he ended it here the amount of :flutterrage: would be so high, he'd have to make a sequel out of fear that he would be killed otherwise.

1111806
1111819

That's the end; I like endings that leave some room for interpretation, and I don't think there's much left that can be explored with this idea (though naturally I could be wrong).

1111819
1111881
:duck:

It's better than trying to return everything to the status quo, which would have been unsatisfying. I do wonder if it was a little... abrupt. Felt like at least another chapter could have been squeezed out of it in the meantime.

Oh well! A good story can't be criticised too harshly. The idea of Pinkie Pie taking over the world is just scary enough to be worth it. :pinkiehappy: Got to say, the best part of the entire thing was Rarity's little mental fight. She just... and it just... well. It was good. Freaky good.

For a moment I though the conversation with Pinkie would spark a reaction that would return Twilight to normal, then again its probably better this open ending then a returning everything to normal one.

This...cdn.chud.com/a/aa/aa669c35_reverse-1233928590_citizen20kane20clapping.gif ...was so damn beautiful...i1193.photobucket.com/albums/aa347/CieruHive/Tumblr%20GIFs/feels.gif ...and also a super cool ending....you get a full FIVE mustaches:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:...use them well, for they are a great source of mighty power...

Something about this ending just rubs me the wrong way. At least make an epilogue to see how everyone is adjusting to the new Twilight. I honestly want to see more of that personality. :trixieshiftright:

Still though it was a really good story.

1111915
Abrupt? Possibly. I didn't want a flood of details or exposition, but perhaps I went too far in the other direction? A chapter showing how twinkie and celestia took over the town might be an option for the rewrite.

And don't be silly! If I was perfect there'd be no need to read the comments :twilightsmile: But thanks, that was one of my favorite parts to write.

1112643
I intentionally left it open to interpretation; how different is twilight after all this? Does Pinkie ever win back the trust of her friends? Or the town? Does everypony accept the new twilight? Or does she only serve to remind them of Pinkie's instability?

I suppose I might have been too vague, but as a reader I value my own reaction to events, and my own interpretation of the aftermath, so I tried to include that quality in this story.

1112731 It just feels like it's the beginning of the story like you can do a little bit more with it, the ending just seems weird like Twilight died and came back with Blue eyes. :applejackunsure:
It's like how much of Pinkie does Twilight have in her.

I can see ways of going with this story but i sure as hell don't have the writing power to do it. :pinkiecrazy:

Ok, I see two major problems here:
Disabling all magic, including her innate earthpony abilities, will effectively destroy Pinkie Pie. The premise of the show is "friendship is magic", cutting her magic will take her out of the loop, as we see in the way her friends keep their distance from her. And that will not get better.
The missing element of laughter is merely an afterthought, compared to that.
The other one is responsability:
Twilight had Pinkie's way of thinking already in her mind, deep enough to be unable to control it, when Pinkie pushed her over the edge. But Pinkie had neither the knowledge about magic nor the time to think or realize the scope of this. And she confesses to feelings of anxiety and loneliness.
I wonder what kind of punishment her royal studentness got. Or did she get away with a stern talking to? Again?:twilightsmile:

1113268
If inspiration strikes it's not out of the question, but prolly unlikely

1113496
Losing her connection to the earth and animals may or may not hamper her other skills; depending on your interpretation of earth pony magic, a case could be made for either notion. It will definitely make her a bit of a black sheep in pony society, and that's why it's a punishment. It's also the surest way (from Celestia's view) to prevent a repeat of this whole incident.
As Celestia tells Pinkie, it's not a question of how much she is responsible; the fact she is responsible at all demands she be punished regardless of whether Twinkie or Pinkie had a bigger share of the responsibility. Also, Celestia actually remembers the events of the first three chapters from Pinkie's view since she received a copy of her memories- this could have affected her view of events.
It's left to the reader to decide whether Twilight received a similar punishment, a harsher one, none at all, or if having her mind irrevocably altered due to her own pride was punishment enough. Any of those options would be in character for Celestia.

I liked the twist there at the end, but my interpretation of the ending takes that twist a bit further:

Twilight hit Pinkie with magic when she converted Rarity back in chapter 3. Pinkie's thoughts had been unusually logical, lucid, and worry...y ever since then. And, not that Pinkie is incapable of being contrite, but she seemed to be uncharacteristically fearful of Luna and Celestia (that's more the domain of the lock-you-up-in-a-dungeon-in-the-magical-kindergarten-that-she-banished-you-to pony). In this last chapter, Twinkie is clearly acting significantly more Pinkiey than "Pinkie" is.

Also, we never did see Pinkie's eyes...

Twinkie and Pilight?

1121400
An intriguing interpretation! Certainly not what I had in mind, but considering how unstable Twinkie is, and given that she doesn't perform the spell perfectly the first time, it's definitely a valid idea.

I come from the land of TF2R. Time to read!

1113496>>1114312
Yeah, I figure that having to be Pinkie is Twilight's punishment here.

1248979
Discord is the spirit of chaos and disharmony, he has a negative influence on everything and enjoys it quite a bit.
Pinkie is a bearer of an element of harmony and IMO just as much a victim to circumstances as anyone else.
It's kind of like comparing Stalin and Alfred Nobel: "I don't care what you did with your money or power, you are both evil because your actions killed thousands!" Hardly a balanced judgement.

1254601 1248979
Luna's comment is meant to evoke her anger at the situation and her still-rusty social skills. How apt it is another matter, but Pinkie is hurt by it because deep down she realizes it's true.

Ohh...

Tatewaki2000 here. Now that I'm lookin' at your story, I think I see the problem.
The format is ugly. Like, really really ugly.

Just make it look more like your fanfiction dot net format, and all shall be goooooddddddd.
STILL I WUB YOUR STORY!~~!!!

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