Rainbow Dash flew sideways across a platform, bounced off a building front, and skidded to a stop in the middle of a vacant market bazaar.
“Unnngh...” She winced, stirred, then got up to her hooves with a smirk. “Well, that wasn't so bad.”
Two creatures dove down and whalloped her upside the head.
“Ow!” Rainbow Dash seethed. “Alright, ya melon fudges! Have it your way!” She jumped behind a stack of barrels, pivoted, and bucked them hard into the air.
As three more creatures came down to strike at Rainbow Dash, they were pummeled in midair by her improvised projectiles. They fell onto the wooden platforms, twitching and thrashing, until a group of Wintergaters galloped over and opportunistically stabbed them to death with polearms.
“That's how you do it!” Rainbow Dash shouted with a smile. “You can all thank me for dinner later!”
“Rainbow!” Gold Petals shouted from a distance.
“What?” Rainbow Dash turned around. “It's you guys who like eating meat, not—WHOAH!”
A rather large monster was flying straight into her. It plowed into her chest and shoved her through the lengths of Windthrow, whizzing past several ponies in a heated battle with the attacking swarm. Rainbow Dash gnashed her teeth and wrestled with the thing's spidery legs. Its thin slit of a mouth drooled and snapped at her, ultimately clamping onto the edge of her golden pendant. Rainbow Dash let loose a pained growl as her eyes swam dizzily. With a snarl, she headbutted the monster off her pendant, flung her neck to the side, and bit hard onto its wing. The creature let out a banshee cry and spun from the weight of Rainbow Dash's jaws. Soon, the two conjoined combatants smashed into the body of a wooden shed in the residential section of the village.
Dust and debris settled over the scene. The distant shouts of various earth ponies echoed through the mists. After several seconds of nothing...
The creature burst back out, then floundered on the ground. Its wing was bleeding and it struggled in futility to stand upright. One of its legs was missing. Just as it lurched towards the edge of the town...
Rainbow Dash dove out of the shed with a dismembered leg in her grasp. She swung the thick, branch-like thing across the abomination's skull several times before gripping the creature's body with her front hooves and stabbing down. Rainbow shoved the spindle-like leg down the creature's throat like a hot pin through butter. With a sickening sound of gurgling breath, the monster choked on its own limb and fell to the floor.
“Ptooie!” Rainbow Dash spat and rubbed her lips. “Tastes like a a deflated balloon. I dunno how Fulltrot and the others do it.” She paused, sniffing, making a face. “The heck smells so bad?”
Just a few feet away from her, Ironhoof marched out of an apartment flat with a nightcap on. “I'm telling you, honey,” he shouted into the house while trotting out. “I've no idea what all the noise is! And I think it's a really stupid excuse for us to have stopped—” He paused, wide-eyed, upon seeing Rainbow Dash and the mutilated creature. “Well then, there it goes.”
“Watch it!” Rainbow Dash shoved him—grunting—to the floor as several more creatures dove down. They knocked over a glowing crystal, spun back, and formed a circle around Rainbow Dash and Ironhoof.
The first of them made a lunge for the stallion, shrieking. Ironhoof curled up into a ball and cried. Rainbow Dash skidded in the way, absorbed the full dive of the creature, latched onto its wing with her teeth, spun all the way around, and flung the monster like a club into its partners.
The creatures flew everywhere like dying fish. As soon as they started thrashing about, another thick group of monsters flew down to take their place. Suddenly, a polearm was being thrust into the spine of one of them. Gold Petals was rushing in, gripping the spear in her teeth and shoving it into the flesh of the invader. No sooner was she impaling the thing when its siblings viciously knocked her aside with their wings.
“Unngh!” Gold Petals flew back, only to be caught in Rainbow Dash's hooves.
“Welcome to the dance-off,” Rainbow Dash mused.
“Not sure I wanted an invite,” Gold Petals stood on four hooves, then sniffed. “What smells so bad?”
“Destiny.”
“You're really full of it.”
“Hahahaha...”
Gold Petals gulped as she and Rainbow Dash and Ironhoof were being surrounded by winged cretins. “We're... We're all gonna die, aren't we?”
“Yeah. Isn't it cool?” She looked over. “Lemme borrow that.” She grabbed Gold Petal's polearm. With the use of her teeth and forelimb, she snapped the thing in half. “Here...” She tossed the barbed tip Gold's way. “You get the easy one.”
“Jee, thanks.”
“If for some reason you live through this and I don't,” Rainbow Dash's eyes briefly flickered red-on-yellow as her pendant glowed a little dimly from within. “Have somepony put my ashes into a bunch of fireworks. I heard that a famous stallion once had that done for him. Ever read Fillies and Loathing in Las Pegasus?”
“I've got bigger things to worry about than obscure books.”
“Obscure? Do you know who you're talking to? Even I know this book.”
The creatures produced a collective shriek as they closed in.
“Oh right. These things.” Rainbow Dash gripped her shattered half of the polearm and scraped her hooves against the ground. “You ready to do this?”
“No.”
“Good. Just stay behind me and try not to look more awesome. By the way, I like your mane.”
Gold Petals blinked. “What?”
“Raaaaugh!” Rainbow Dash gave a warcry and leapt violently into the phalanx of leathery bodies.
Awesome chapter! Rainbow would definitely be this witty in battle
Rainbow has developed a wit and no issue with killing things? What is that pendant doing?!
She's not witty! She's gay! This pony is a technicolor fruit! She's a chutney ferret! She's batting for the home team! She's homosexual! Her barn door swings the other way! She's an honorary resident of the isle of Lesbos! She bites pillows! She goes to bars, buys rounds of drinks, comforts heartbroken mares, and has sexual intercourse with them! THIS IS AN EXPATRIATE!!
708329
Hehe, Monty Python Parrot Sketch, right?
IIIIIt's Dashie's Marathon Evaluation Time!
Here, we get more fight scenes with a nearly perfectly in character Rainbow Dash. As Mithrandir said, Dash would definitely be this witty in battle. But there is still something amiss...I like...your mane...?...I LIKE...YOUR MANE...?!...I LIKE YOUR MANE??!! What is that, author? What IS that?! I didn't want this kind of a romantic sub-plot! Ugh...it's kind of dissapointing. Anyways, now that my rage is out of the way, I also just wanted to say that this chapter was rather gory. It just doesn't seem natural for this kind of mysterious fanfic, you know? I wonder how many chapters the battle will span across...These are my thoughts so far.
-MASH
P.S. My eyelids are getting heavy...n-no...only 4 left...must always evaluate...
Haha! OP Dash is best dash Also, listening to Jump by Two Steps from Hell http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gkhneh9JNnE while reading the action sequences and it makes everything at least 20% cooler (ugh, yes I went there ) Onward!
Alright, I'm starting to get irritated with a few things.
708329 i know im really late to the party but this is a awesome comment
Very cool actiosn scene! Rainbow in combat is the best! :D
Rainbow sure took a level in badass
The melon fudges line...
My poor sides...
What smells so bad?
...Ironhoof walks out.
What smells so bad?
Destiny.
Silver out!
1448507
AHAHAHAHAH.
Late to the party? There's always someone later.
Melon fudges... that is just the best insult ever, I'm going to have to steal it for whenever I need to insult someone. They will cry at the might of the melon fudge Also, Rainbow Dash beat up a creature with his own limb? Celestia, that sure is a bad way to go.
Yes! Bring on the romantic sub-plot that so many people hate!
I have made a promise that I will get to chapter 100 by the time midnight strikes tomorrow. I'm going to be very disappointed when I fail. Anyhow, to help my noble cause, these comments are probably going to end up even shorter than they usually are now. With that said, happy reading to you all!
~FierceRainbow (I really like this fancy sign-off, and I'm going to be doing it after every comment now. So I guess my comments still have to be kind of long so it doesn't look stupid. I can do short and long at the same time, easy )
I do admit, Gold Petals has quite the mane.
Critics in the past few weeks.
5012740
Ooh, ouch.
Meanwhile, the shipping continues.
50/1 they kiss at chapter 150, +- 3 chapters.
OMC, Rainbow just beat a creature to death with its own leg AND made it eat it?
You go, girl!
Hmmm, so she can call upon the 'discordant' magic in her Element....interesting
So many people hostile to harmless flirting in these comments. It's as if the characters can't have feelings that extend beyond friendship. It's kind of disappointing.
3179219 Eeyup
Ladies and gentlemen. rainbow dash in a nutshell. This story is brilliant on so many levels.
1359529 Your username fits you so well.
What was that about not being awesome last chapter? She just ripped one's leg off, beat it over the head with it and then shoved the leg down its throat. If that isn't totally awesome, I don't know what is!
sigh... there went the parasprite idea too.
3717084 I use insults from this story all the time
How on earth did I miss this the first time?
Congratulations! At this point, you are 1% of the way to the end of Utaan from Austraeoh...
Want me to get ya something? You're gonna be here a while.
yay! just a 1700 or so more chapters sooo closseee
5079152
asshole you don't even put a spoiler warning on it?
Good reaction to compliments.
Good Lord, Dash! I know you're trying to look cool, but that execution was a bit much, don't you think?
Also, her death wish seems off the charts. I know she's supposedly got "nothing to lose" but she is on some kind of important mission, right?
Readers: Due to some unthinking comments, these comments may contain unhidden spoilers.
*glares at a comment*
Please consider this as you proceed through the story.
Did not catch this my first time through. He might not be super tough or all that capable, but at least the guy was getting some.
9748828
Yeah, I've been glancing at comments cuz I wanna know other first reader's thoughts, but so many people are hinting at things in their 2nd read through. Implying this or that is foreshadowing or otherwise shouldn't be taken for face value. Things first readers shouldn't *know* aren't as they seem.
I can't believe Ironhoof didn't shower or take a bath before doing anything else, especially given the implication of what he was doing instead here.
Action Star Rainbow Dash is on the scene. Violence, destruction, quips, wheeeeeee!
Go forth Rainbow Dash, and Be Awesome.
Oh, and Gold Petals can maybe help out some too I guess.
I'm sorry, but did Dash just rip that creature's arm off and beat it to death with it?! Because that's hardcore and I love it!