• Published 13th May 2012
  • 39,595 Views, 7,646 Comments

Austraeoh - Imploding Colon

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Solution

Rainbow Dash ducked, yanking Gold Petals down with her. The air rang with shrieks as the leathery monsters swooped down over the ponies' billowing manes. The two turned around to see the monsters dipping violently into the crowd, knocking ponies over onto their flanks and smashing buildingfaces with their spidery limbs.

“Well, this stinks,” Rainbow Dash grunted.

“Rainbow, what'll we do?!” Gold Petals exclaimed.

“Uhhh... running away sounds nice!”

Gold Petals frowned. “I'm serious!”

“Yeah, okay, fine.” Rainbow looked over. “Hey! Astral?!”

“Daaah!” Astral was smacked by a monster and tossed into Rainbow Dash's side. “Ooof!”

“Oooh! Hey there!” Rainbow grinned and ducked a flying spray of debris. “So, like, how can I make this situation 'un-screwed'?”

“The monsters will k-keep attacking...” Astral strained to speak, all the while creating energy force-fields to hold the diving abominations off. “...until the chaos energies being channeled through the strips is cut off!”

“Okay then!” Rainbow Dash shouted above the growingly horrendous scene. “So, like, how do I do that?!”

“Only the minotaurs knew the enchantment that activated the strips!” a voice exclaimed. Suddenly, Sladesteed was running over and kneeling beside the other three. “My job was just to hold the strip they forced into my possession! If I knew how to shut off the magic ages ago, I would have!”

“You expect us to believe that?!” Gold Petals frowned at him. “Haven't you done enough crap to this village?!”

“I never wanted ponies to die!” Sladesteed snarled. “I want this to end as much as you do! And what's with your voice all of the sudden?!”

“Yours is gonna be a higher pitch than mine once Fulltrot's stallions are through with you—”

“Look, can we harm each other's genitals later?!” Rainbow Dash's voice cracked. She waved her forelimbs as the group huddled under Astral's protective energy field. “If we can't turn the strips off, can we break them?”

“Not through any physical means that we have in our possession!” Astral exclaimed. “If I had the wizards of Southstone to lend their gifts, then maybe!”

Rainbow Dash ducked a ravenous monster and frowned. “I really don't want to go on a field trip right now! What else can we do?!”

“Let's toss them both off the side of the mountain!” Gold Petals exclaimed. “The further away they are, the better for Windthrow, right?!”

“That will only make for a bigger problem later!” Astral said, straining to keep his magical barrier alive. “The longer those strips remain active, the bigger a portal they'll make into the chaos dimensions! Soon, this entire mountain won't be safe!”

“That's not a good thing, right?!” Gold Petals remarked.

Rainbow Dash winced. Her eyes flashed a brief yellow as she weathered a dizzy spell. “No,” she grunted. “It's not.”

“I'll grab the strips!” Sladesteed said. “I'll run the length of Fulltrot's Caravan trail for as long as I can. You can get the Southstone wizards to come and clean things up—off my corpse if need be.” He stood up.

Rainbow Dash yanked him down. “Don't even pretend like you got what it takes to be a martyr.” She turned to Astral. “Are there any other options?”

“If there was a way to contain the strips, perhaps!” Astral shouted. He and the others winced as the huge face of a building smashed down a few yards away. Cracks began forming in the wooden platforms below. “But I don't have a spell strong enough to hold back the chaos energies!”

“Well, what do you need, then?!”

“Some sort of arcane capsule would be perfect in this situation!” Astral said. “But I don't know of a metal substance with enough power to disenchant the chaos portal!”

Rainbow Dash blinked. Her wings twitched. “Duh! Of course you do! We all do!”

“Huh?”

Rainbow Dash beamed, standing up. “The structure! The ancient interior! It'd be perfect!” She was smacked upside the head by a diving monster. “Owie!” She winced and shook her skull.

Astral winced. “How do you intend to get them in there?!”

“Silly unicorn! With my wings, of course!” She scurried over to the glowing strips. “All I need to do is—”

Astral gasped. “Miss Dash! Wait! Remember that—”

Rainbow touched the strips. Immediately, she collapsed in a dizzy spell. Her ruby pendant strobed and her eyes flickered yell. “Ughhhhhh—Buckin' a, I forgot...”

“Rainbow!” Gold Petals scurried over. “What's wrong?”

“I can't exactly carry these things,” Rainbow Dash sputtered, trying not to vomit. “I'm like—chaos-intolerant—or some crap.”

“Then how will get get these strips to that place you were talking about?!” she exclaimed. She looked over her shoulder and winced at the dozens of ponies fleeing from the attacking swarm. “I don't think this place is gonna last another minute! I can't even see Mom or Dad—”

The strips fell into Gold Petals' hooves.

She glanced down at the glowing artifacts. “Uhm...”

Rainbow Dash stood up. “I may not be able to carry these stupid things, but I definitely can carry you.”

Gold Petals blinked. “Carry m-me? Daaaah!” She was being hoisted off her hooves. She flinched and hugged the strips to her chest.

“You just got drafted, girlfriend!” Rainbow Dash grinned psychotically and sped the two of them towards the mines beyond the mist. “Hey!” She shouted over her and Gold Petals' shoulders. “Fart-faces! This way to freedom, you winged pieces of demon luggage!”

The monsters swirled in formation, collected in the air, and formed a solid line of banshee-screaming hunger. The ponies of Windthrow glanced up in shock as their sworn enemy left the violent scene and surged as one after the Equestrian and the shrieking blonde in her grasp.

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