Dreamscape
Joined 7th Oct, 2012 ·
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I got to say this before reading it. Vinyl Scratch looks like she is looking over at Fluttershy and Twilight thinking "I like where this is going."
4825286
Maybe she wants in on the action.
Anyways, great story so far.
I like where this is going.
An interesting start, and I sure do like TwiShy.
A quick question, will this be entirely in Fluttershy's point of view, or will it alternate between her and Twilight?
4826209
Good question. I think I'll be sticking with Fluttershy's perspective.
4826269 Good plan. I look forward to reading more.
Yup, this is gonna be good. Looking forward to more!
HURRAY!
More TwiShy
like what I'm reading so far. I just really hope this does not somehow lead to an "incomplete" pile of dead dreams for me.
Pacing is superb, and Fluttershy is in perfect character. I really like how you've made her seem eloquent in her mind, while showing that she is aware of her social difficulties. I rarely see that perfromed as admirably as it is done here (often people have her as shy and restrained "oh, dear" in her head [I'm Guilty of it as well, but I like this better])
Please accept this like, fav and follow.
Cheers.
-T
It's not terrible, and the premise is more sane than most. My two biggest problems with the story, however, make it hard to enjoy.
The first one is the fact that you have Fluttershy turn to the audience to say things like
Which is a completely flow breaker, not to mention telling the reader how they are probably feeling (if they aren't they'll feel like that afterwards) which is never good for the immersion in your story.
Secondly, your description, while pretty good in most places, suffers from a little bit too much attention to detail where it isn't needed. Everyone that reads the story will (hopefully) know that Fluttershy has a lot of feed for her animals which makes spending almost a paragraph on that a little tedious. Such things should only be brought up if something interesting happens to them.
Just my 2 cents.
4828707
I've always found that the personality of a character is much more important than the story itself. Since this is from Fluttershy's perspective, I don't want to completely destroy her personality just so it "flows" better. I just feel like she would say something like that. So I put it in. As for description, people either complain that there is too much or too little, so I do what I feel is best.
4828431
Thank you very much. It's comments like yours that keep me writing. I'm glad you're enjoying her personality. I myself am shy in person, so I know how different the mind of a shy person, or pony in this case, is then what they display to others.
4828807
Then I shall say no more. Good luck with the rest of the story.
Hmmm, when I read the words "not just clop" I wasn't expecting much more than "porn with a plot." What I found was an incredibly detailed description of Fluttershy's thoughts and feelings while tending to her animals and herself. I am impressed, keep up the good work.
Magus Neon
The way it's going, I think Twilight will find out eventually. That or Fluttershy will do cause a specific scenario to happen.
Loving it so far bro
.
It's a good thing that Twilight lacks understanding social clues, otherwise she would've figured out Fluttershy's reactions already. Speaking of, that could lead to some rather humorous, and adorable, interactions.
It seems that I can't upvote this again. Hmm, I wonder what I should do...
I know! I'll give you five "yays"
So cute.
Continue what you are doing good sir/madam
x1.fjcdn.com/comments/4943728+_8da028507ff880f7508a494929453167.jpg
4832365 it seems that someone has a predisposition for an interesting story such as this.
A clop fic, that doesn't focus on the clop entirely, and more on the characters, and their isn't even a sex scene yet, and It doesn't suck, fuck almost all those clop fics that get into the featured, THIS IS ONE OF THE FEW THAT ACTUALLY DESRVES TO BE ON THE FEATURED LIST!
I am really liking this so far. Keep it up!
Loving the story so far.
Quite lovely so far...
[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=l1YmS_VDvMY]
But no, seriously, fantastic dude. Keep it up.
That's why you're drinking, Twi.
Awww damn Flutters getting laid toniiiight!
WHY. HAS. THIS. NOT. BEEN. FEATURED. YET!
Uh oh... if she's second guessing this already, this is probably going to end awkwardly.
Oh man oh man things are going down! Good writing btw. It reads really nicely.
Mmmmm. I like this. I am proud to have such an author on my ship.
I did spot a few minor grammatical errors, though. As a Grammar Nazi, I'm a bit more tuned in to it, but it's not enough to damage the story. Well-written. I like.
<3 DarqFox
Hi dear :)
WHat ho, you made a the popular list!! Figures, you really are quite the fab writer. ^^
Thumbs up from me!! :)
Me
inb4 skipped the clop
im not sure what to think on this ship personally... but... FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODDESS!
MOAR!!!!!.... please? 
Also, please, i would REALLY love the hints to be true, that Twi and Fluttershy get together in a happy ending. I know you have your plans, im just here expressing my thoughts on my hopes of happy endings.
4900817
I did indeed; and thanks
Hrm... after two readings of what you have so far, I have decided to like this. However, it is the most recent chapter that has earned the fave from me!
Which is odd, as clop doesn't normally do that. 
Related sidenote: This was in my head as I was reading this chapter for some odd reason.
4906379
Poor flutteryshy
.
Um, wtf Twilight? You get her to go to a party she wouldn't have gone to, make a big deal about spending more time with her to Dash, get drunk and give her a close up of your butt, have sex with her, and then you need to think? Seems to me like Fluttershy was your test subject for "Experimenting."
38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m74jru1W471rohpxso1_500.jpg
Twilight left and took my few remaining feels with her.
And so it begins. Again.
i like it and Dreamscape can you write a sequel for this story
Wait! Gah! Complete? I was hoping to actually see this develop.
It was interesting while it lasted though, well written. I was just thinking it was going to get to the more interesting parts of them trying some dates and seeing where it ends up. Especially since we never see how she handles meeting her friends again, who, at least, to Fluttershy, seem to think she is a pony who is willing to have one night stands with her friends.
Ending seems comparatively rushed compared to other chapters, but this is a nice clopfic with a better storyline surrounding it. I enjoyed it.
If the previous chapter had some impressive leaps of faulty logic coming out of Twi, this one puts them to shame. I can not for the life of me figure out what's going on in Twilight's head to make her think any of what she's saying is going anywhere but disaster...
...though what bothers me is the fact that that doesn't.
Well done, brother. I very much appreciate your contribution to my *underappreciated* ship.
<3 DarqFox
Wow, this literally made me almost cry. Poor girl, I know how that feels