• Member Since 31st May, 2012
  • offline last seen Nov 2nd, 2020

Snake Staff

A young man working his way through life and writing for fun.


This story is a sequel to The Dark Ones

Many years after the destruction of Equestria, Twilight Sparkle serves the Imperial Inquisition in its war against those responsible. Having thought her past safely buried, what will become of her when it returns with a vengeance?

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Chapters (18)
Comments ( 442 )

Done reading the Dark Ones
Now reading this one. Now I am waiting for Inquisitor Twilight. Though, I think TS can transform herself into a human even if it is temporarily. And I can't wait till Twilight get her revenges. :twilightsmile:

Hmm, interesting. I shall track it.

Though, I have a question...What about Starswirl's mirrors? Equestria literally had multiple gateways to several parallel worlds....I wonder if Sunset could return. She'd probably want to join in with Twilight to get revenge for her homeworld's destruction.

Goodness, so quick to pass judgement. Hopefully she gains some perspective regarding the nature of the universe at large along the way.

It's kind of hard to be unbiased when you've just found out your new "friends" would have killed your planet just as readily as ones who actually did so, followed by being given the choice of lifetime service or execution. Not a good day by any standard.

4663238 Not a good day at all, but you still have to have a bit of sympathy for the Imperium. Brutality is the only means of survival in their universe.

Given the situation and her prior moral groundings, her level of pragmatism is remarkable. Many ponies, and people as well, would have done something stupid or idealistic and gotten executed for it. But one's head and one's heart can take opposite stances, and at the time Twilight does not feel terribly sympathetic to the Imperium. She does, however, feel that their total lack of regard for alien lives is just what she needs to get some payback, because what else is there for her?

4663949 I just have a question, will she at least feel sorry for the citizenry of the Imperium? I feel like they're just along for the ride for the most part, and I'd hate see them get flak for what the hierarchy does along the way.

Now this is getting better and better. :rainbowkiss:

I definitely like this chapter.
But I hope there will be no turning Twilight into human.

Wow, way to introduce characters and then kill them off-

Oh wait, this is 40k.

Carry on then.

Man, when I saw the Necron get involved at the end of The Dark Ones, I knew this would be an instant favorite (Necron #1 Faction).

Now, I wonder as to where we can go in this W40k Universe using only the one character...

Typo, my good fellow. I shall fix it posthaste. As soon as I finish polishing my monocle.

I like to set the tone early on. Anyone can die, at any time, and it makes total sense in-universe!

Great work so far. I honestly can't wait to see what happens next.

4665442 Pfft, that's not how you spell Tau.

And this shows how much Twilight changed after the events in the previous fanfic. Though, it's not said how she gets to lead a squad and how she got that (Sister of Battle level?) armor. Will we find out more about this in the next chapters?
Thumbed-up and favourited.

So, I read this completely by chance the other night and I have yet to read the first story but so far I really like it. Too often you find 40k fics where the Imperium of Man shows up and gives the little ponies a helping hand against the big bad chaos or whatevers. Thing is, I really like this so far because you actually show the Imperium as it is. They aren't nice people, they're monsters and as Twilight herself pointed out they've killed entire alien races simply because they aren't human. Hell, realistically, if they had made contact with the whole Equestria their first move would be to wipe them all out. They're mistrusting of her, they hate her for existing and any one of them would gladly end her life in a heart beat. And that is exactly how it should be. I enjoy the fact that the Inquisition is going to use her as a resource to stop this new threat and would not be surprised if at the end of all this someone who's degraded themselves to pretend to be her friend puts a bolter round through her skull. Because that's the 40k universe, it's dark, gritty and everyone dies, regardless of who or what you are, everyone dies.

Anyways, my long rant aside, like the fic so far. Totally giving it a thumbs up and I'll be keeping an eye on it as it updates. Emperor guide you my brother.

Great chapter, though I'm fairly sure that Mindshackle scarabs are supposed to be really small, like microscopic small, its a minor gripe on the whole but still.

4666886 eh, this is close to pre-imperial/necron contact. you could argue that the mindshackle scarabs were reduced in size over time (i know the necrons arent exactly known for inovation but it's possible. i mean they started making pariahs ((who i will love to see ts deal with btw)) so it's not outside the suspencion of disbelief.

In this fic's Imperium, Equestrians command you.

Ha, the "Want it, need it" spell. Classic.^^b
I´m really intrigued how Twi got permission to wear such high quality gear. I thought all she would eventualy get would be a flak-vest (or maaaaaaaybe Imperial Guard level armor) and a laspistol at most but not one but two boltpistols and what appeared to be at last plate armor. Her first mission must have went pretty well then hn? Chance that we get a chance to see some of it? Flashbacks or dreams maybe?

4667130 The Mindshackles scarab needs to be pretty small to be used effectively, and while the Pariha was more of an adjustment from the previous conversion tech, the Mindshackle Scarabs are a completely different field of technology, so they would have had it for a long while, like before they went to sleep. The fact that any Necron Dynasty can take the Scarabs supports this, I highly doubt that they updated the Mindshackle scarab tech in their time of contact with the Imperium, they don't do that.

Check the time stamp handily affixed to each chapter. I put them there for a reason. Chapter 1 takes place around six Imperial years (which are considerably longer than ours, remember) after the Prologue. She's had time to rise in stature.

I'm eager to see what is her current stature...
Psyker Primaris? Interrogator? Lord-Inquisitor? Space Mare? :pinkiecrazy:

but yeah, between the prequel story, and these first chapters, weidert.com/Portals/65360/images/curiosity.jpg

I guessed that much. To be honest, the Imperial calendar confusses the fuck out of me.^^°
First stamp says ++3.794.873.M39++ but the second says ++3.631.879.M39++. To me it looks like the second chapter takes place waaaaay before the first. Like, time is counted backwards. How do you read this timeline again?^^°

EDIT: Scratch that, I noticed the difference.*derp*

Lexicanum explains it pretty well.

4667190 either way, might as well take it as another form (since there are many examples of the same base model with different minor alterations all throught 40k verse) of mindshackel scarab or one of Szeras's "augmentations" since we know he's involved in this story and he's one of the few necrons known to mess around with existing necron tech. either way, it's probably creative licence because a guys face exploding xenomorph style is more exciting and easy to understand than say all of his face orifices suddenly bleeding as the things self destruct inside his neural pathways all at once, or his whole head rapidly desintigrating semi-rapidly as they all use tiney gauss tech to tear him apart from the inside out or so on.

By the Emperor this is some good 40k.

People dying everywhere, new characters introduced in random scenes just to kill them off a moment later, almost utter disregard for the gruesome demise of loved ones, ect.


Great chapter. Only real error I saw was describing the necron's walk. Gait, not gate.

Keep up the good work.

Great chapter again.

They are monsters they sacrificed their humanity the moment they put their uniform on so that those on the ground don't have to.:fluttercry:

4668323 The microscopic scarabs can still make a head explode, but I do see your point, and besides, its still a minor gripe

Still, Snake Staff, can you tell us if we'll know more about Twilight's ascension and rank at this point of the story? There surely aren't many xenos leading Inquisition's squads in the Imperium (and without direct supervision from a superior), and it would be interesting to see how did the alicorn manage to go so far.

You will. I simply wanted to start this fic off with a bang, both to set the tone as contrasting it's predecessor and for other reasons that will become apparent in time.

I see Trazyn is at it again.
Is he looking for something on the planet?

Or looking to complete his Alicorn collection?

Oh, I so want Trazyn to 'lead' a small contingent that just so happens to run into Twilight.

Aisen is best warrior of the emperor. definetly needs to get recruited into an inquisitorial team. he killed a monolith for gods sake, people have gotten better rewards for less.

4679951 But then, becoming part of an inquisitorial kill team could easily be considered anything but a reward

That Aisen sure is good at it. This part was funny. Good idea to contrast with the darker prequel.
I wonder if Twilight is going to meet the Thunder Serpents.
So, she's an Acolyte now? Not bad for a xeno witch.

This is a really great start, well written and I like Twilight's mental transformation. It would be very interesting to see what happened in her mind to emerge from her coma that way.


I don't like how it looks like her face was sculpted out of a block of cheese.

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