• Member Since 24th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Sunday

Sorren


I write like once a year.

T
Source

Daring Do has always had a knack for exploration. Usually, one should listen to locals when they promise to you on their life's blood that your next destination may be the end of you... But she was Daring Do, no way were a bunch of old stories going to turn her away.

Chapters (5)
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Comments ( 60 )

Wow.
Can't wait to read what comes next!

So this is really why Rainbow Dash loves the Daring Do stories.

Purty good.
Never ending caverns, half-dead explorers, and a mysterious "them"
hunting everypony down. Why am I reminded of Half-Life?

I need more immediately. Like, I legitimately got creeped out while reading this. Reminds me a bit of Silent Hill. If Silent Hill were underground.

Keep writing this, you magnificent bastard! :yay:

Why is it always sacrificial rites?
I enjoyed it. I like Rivers' character. She's not completely crazy. I'm thinking she'll be very important later.
Daring is very calm. It's a pretty good contrast.

So far this place reminds me of a combination of Amnesia: The Dark Descent and the House of Leaves.
I like it.

431759 Because generally that passes as the most creepy. And it was very common in most temples then too. put 1 and 1 together and you have convincing creepy.

Damn I'm good at math.

Well well well... that was interesting, slightly creeping and had an air of mystery about it. Excellent work, I will be watching for another chapter! Also, on another note about the previously mentioned correction regarding scones... scones are a type of pasty, sconces are metal light fixtures...

Oh yeah and thanks for the link, rockin to some of their tracks now!

...and the severe lack of pony carcasses could only means two thing, either it never been used or there's something that eats very neatly :twilightoops:

is rivers in any way similar to that completely out of it guy from crystal skull?
sure feels like it anyways.

436045
*gags* Oh sorry. The Crystal Skull just gives me that reaction... Aliens... WHY aliens!?! This is Indiana Jones. Damn you, Stephen.

436055
i was more talking about that crazy (or not?) other archeologist that got there first. answer pretty please?

383258

For I quote this man with the cigar "Brilliant!" Cause that is what it is. Its the best fic I have read in a while. Keep me amused! :ajsmug:

Well, as the first comment on ch. 4, I gotta say that your "not doing your best" is still quite good! This chapter certainly cemented the element of insanity that this place holds. I await more... keep on writing :twilightsmile:

I knew it! She is a ghost! or something... Freaking chills bro...

537638 Hey, thanks for reading. Imma submit this to EqD when I get this finished.

537662 No chance in hell they are gonna turn it down. Really good story, first story to actualy really creep me out...

537671 It always bothered me that I could write creepy better than happy. This is the first story in a while I really let it out on.

537678 I completely agree, 'in the sense of I do the same thing' but it is a good talent to have regardless.

It's good. Very good. Has the same eerie feeling to it that another one of my favorites has.

Ha! You were nuts the entire time, Daring!
Silly pony. :rainbowwild:

Now THAT is closure.

A fine ending to a fine story.

Oh goodness :pinkiesad2:

Now that's what I call a heart-warming ending :yay:

Great story :pinkiehappy: I haven't read too many Daring Do fics, but this one just capitvated me from the start. I thought it would just be a particularly dark adventure story, but then it suddenly went all psychological horror on me. Really well excecuted psychological horror at that.

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Hey, Thanks for all the positive feedback. I never expected this to be liked by almost everypony who read it. EqD actually approved it to be sent to the pre-readers. This is great.

I literarily shat my pants.
"the walls ate my tail."
*shudder*:fluttershyouch:

618511 I'm glad you like it so far.

Oh. My. Bucking. Gawd! :pinkiegasp:
This is my literal reaction to this story ( in order of occurance):
:raritycry: omygod! She's gone
:pinkiesad2: sniff such a good letter
:rainbowderp: wait wat her ghost is...wat?
:fluttercry: Waaaaaaaah!
:rainbowlaugh: lol dynamite
Seriously amazing job. :rainbowkiss:

618730 Thanks for reading. This was one of my favorite fics to write, even if it didn't get that much recognition.

618761
Why this fic has so little, well...popularity, is completely beyond me.

ha never finished this fic been sitting here for a while

Absolutely a wonderful story! I was kept on the edge of my seat pleading that Daring would 'Never Back Down' and give in to the insanity of the place! Keep up the good work! I will definitely read any of your future tales! Thanks again!

This fic was absolutely astounding. Really, it was. So scary and equally heartwarming. :fluttercry:

I weep for poor Rivers. She seems like she was such a nice mare, probably went into that temple figuring 'huh, I can check this place out and make lots of money, my foal can be set for life!', only to wind up leaving her alone and without any parents....truly a very sad fate. :fluttershbad::fluttershyouch:

The ending definitely has tons of closure, however. Knowing the ghosts found a way out, Daring Do can get herself as many explosives as possible and LEVEL that bucking temple! No more doomed souls for any of those evil spirits!

FIRE IT UP! FIRE IT UP! FIRE IT UP!!! :rainbowdetermined2:

1234226 You read this :twilightblush: It's been a long time since anypony has read this. Thank you for that comment.

1234271
It's a damn good fic, what can I say? I read damn good fics. :raritywink:

Ezn

Seattle's Angels pointed me here. It was an interesting read. I do enjoy a bit of surreal mindscrewy horror, and this managed to deliver on that and even have a happy ending that worked well with the rest.

I definitely feel that it was way overwritten though, especially the first half. Most paragraphs had at least one sentence that could have been struck completely and another that should have been compressed and integrated into the rest of the paragraph. I found myself skimming at points because of all the redundancies and explanations of obvious things.

I suppose it's a bit silly to offer critique on such an old story, though. I'm sure your newer writing's much better.

Anyway, thanks for writing this. It was an interesting read.

1829799 Than you very much for the review. And as you stated, this is a very old story, I wrote it about nine months ago, and since then, yes, I have gotten a lot better.

Thanks again.

It is criminal that this doesn't have more views, really well done horror, have a watch and a read of you're back catalogue.
For the record I like the slower build up and the pacing of the story

Her wing was what one could call, broken.

Pretty sure that comma is not supposed to be there.

“I’m coming River’s,” she whispered. “Hang in there.”

No apostrophe.

It's probably because I believe Rivers is a figment of Daring's imagination, but pretty much all of the creepy vibe I was getting in earlier chapters is gone now that she decided to go back in. I also found her talking to herself to be more comical than creepy.

Rivers screamed as fell to her belly and was dragged away, towards the golden sarcophagus and the glowing crystal stone.

Missing a word

Well, I can't say I'm surprised with how the events turned out.
The pacing was well done for this chapter.

I would have liked to see more development for Rivers. I suppose her ending would have had a greater impact on me emotionally if she weren't so cryptic and mystical. Nonetheless, the story was good.

2809957 Thanks for the commentary. And yeah, thanks for pointing those errors out. I wrote this story quite some time ago, so there's bound to be all sorts of writing issues.

That was great. not the best but it certainly was great.

3194936 I know it's not the best :rainbowwild:

And thank you!

3195500 I actually wrote a comment? I thought that was a hallucination from the story.

At the request of your blog I took the time to read this and I can say this is underrated. Despite how short it is, this story was written with the same passion as your other works. I hope one day you will write another one of these.

3258621 Wow, thanks.

As for another fic like this. I should probably get some motivation for something of the sorts. I mean, I kinda wore out the tunnel aspects with this one, and I really do love tunnels. So I'm not quite sure.

3259374 I know about tunnels from my D&D days. As for your motivation I can only pray to Celestia that it happens. Good night :twilightsmile:

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