• Member Since 23rd Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen Last Friday


All my stories end with the word "gullible." No really, check them out!


Pinkie Pie devises a new plan to drum up money for Sugarcube Corner and spread cheer to all of the ponies of Equestria.

It doesn't exactly turn out the way she hoped.

Pre-read by the amazing LadyCobraa.
Cover done by BlackStealth08.
Dramatic Youtube Reading by EnderBlaze.

Featured on 2/3/2014. Whoa. That's pretty tight.
Also 100% Approved by Twilight's Library!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 122 )

I fucking love you for this. Just... Fav and like.


Thanks a bunch!

I love this!
OP promised and OP delivered.


Glad to see my first actual legit attempt at comedy was entertaining! Means a lot!

Made me laugh the whole way through. Well done.

I liked this a lot, just two things though. One, I don't think a police officer would ever use the term 'criminal scum' seriously. Two, if they didn't have cars until now, why would the police have an impound? Might be better to say they confiscated it or something. Just a couple of thoughts there, very funny stuff though.:twilightsmile:

If this doesn't make the Featured Box, then you people have no taste.

I keep thinking of that Robbie Williams song "Candy". Pinkie really was "a little too high" to notice what sort of trouble she was getting herself into.:pinkiehappy:
Anyhoo, this gets an upvote and a watch. Well done.

I laughed so hard I almost sh*t my pants. Instant fave.

Pinkie is suh a gem. :heart:

Holy.. I... just wow.... I like and fav this! Great work!

Also, sent celestia in to convince people some ones not a 'predator' ha ha ha


I've basically just come to accept that I'm never going to be featured. *shrug*

It's just not something that's ever really going to happen to me.

3891128 Don't ever think that! It took me thirteen stories before I got featured - you've only got eight! Your time will come when it does, don't lose hope.


Well, I thought him saying "criminal scum" would be pretty over the top, but that was my intent with the line. I just thought it would be exaggerated enough to be comical in some way.

And funnily enough, I was also debating between the word "confiscate" and "impound," and I actually went with the latter because it sounded a little more ridiculous. After all, there really shouldn't be "police-impounded vehicles" in this world, as you've already said, but I thought the effect would be more comical if it kinda sorta didn't make sense. I guess the intent on my part wasn't clear enough, but oh well. :twilightsheepish:

Thanks a lot for your comment!


Thanks a lot! I really appreciate it!


Glad you guys enjoyed it!


Considering that I've never written Pinkie before until this story, that means a lot. And again, thanks a million for pre-reading for me!

I knew from the title of the story that this would be THE story to read. I do always love those innocent tales that can be twisted into sick proportions, thus invoking an element of comedy. After all, who would trust a pink pony in a windowless, metal van that has 'Free Candy' painted on there? I would.


I just got to the bottom of the non-mature feature box! YAHOOVER! :pinkiehappy::yay:

No my saneness, baby come back, you can blame it all on me


It's some pretty crazy stuff.

3892666 You know what would be a good idea?



*is waiting anxiously*

3892678 Giving Pinkie a pickup truck with a large radio in the back, complete with large speakers. And Adderall.

Prepare for the deafening of Equestria.


Possible Sequel? :raritywink:

Feel like I've read this somewhere before...


Where? :rainbowhuh: Did some other author do something similar? God, I hope not!

3892737 It's probably nothing. Just had a weird sense of deja vu while reading this. Pay it no mind.
With that being said, I love this story. Made me giggle like an idiot. Nicely done. :twilightsmile:



No problem! Glad you liked it!

No words, only love.:moustache:

As someone who was actually on adderall in the past, this is great.


I'd imagine that probably wasn't the greatest experience to have to be on that drug. Glad you liked the story, though!




And I was allergic to it too! The doctors didn't figure that one out till two years after they put me on it!


Oh, dang. If you don't mind me asking, what tipped them off to the fact? (If you don't want to, that's fine!) That sounds pretty gnarly to be allergic to it when it already has some bad effects on some people...

I know Ritalin is a different drug and all, but I had a friend that took it for his ADHD, and it completely screwed him up, so I guess I'm just naturally curious.

This fic makes me want to have my main character build a combustion engine. Perhaps to the dismay of Celestia?
"Can't you just... become one? With that glove?"

"Well I could, but then I wouldn't be able to stick a dick in it, could I? Well, i guess I could..."
Celestia's eyes widen.
"...but it would have to be someone else's. I'm making it so I can stick mine in it."
Celestia closes her eyes, inhales deeply, and let's it out.
That is definitely going in.


I was like eight at the time, so I don't really recall, I think they did some bloodwork or something and that tipped them off.


Well, it's a good thing that they figured it out before something serious happened.

Nice talking to you!

Awesome! And I could totally see her doing something like this, with her strange combo of naivete and hidden genius. Another reason why Pinkie Pie is best pony. :pinkiehappy:
Also, Pinkie being grilled by a cop. This was my immediate expectation--

This was hilarious!
Also, I have a potential idea for the beginning of a sequel, unfortunately based on experience. Pinkie + Aderall + 5-hour Energy. I'm lucky, in the 8 years I've been on Aderall, I've never had any side effects... until last semester. I was cramming the night before a test and was tired, so I drank an extra strength 5-hr energy... I wasn't able to sleep for 2 and a half days, then slept for a day and a half.
Strangely, I don't have problems with the regular ones, so apparently whatever makes it 'extra strength' is the problem.

I... I take Adderall...
Well, I hope not all people who do are seen like this... heh...
Pinkie = Short-term Memory? Since when? o.O

This is exactly why I am EXTREMELY careful about what meds I take. If I take the wrong meds even once...:pinkiecrazy:

Goddamnit, heavy stimulants :rainbowlaugh:.

Nice story! but the Twilight tag is a bit redundant.


Jeez Louise, that was hilarious. His crying had me on the floor. Thanks for sharing that!

What's that colt's problem? Free candy, that doesn't just come along every day.

Free candy is free candy. :moustache:

3895875 Anytime! Thanks for the story!

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