Just a person that reads, writes, and reviews stuff. Oh, and draws.
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When Scootaloo was filly, she was told by Twilight that Rainbow Dash had died in an accident while doing performing a stunt in the Wonderbolt Academy. Scootaloo vowed to repay her by becoming a Wonderbolt. She has to now win this race to be a Wonderbolt and for a Rainbow Dash.
Inspired by Repercussions and To be like her written by Gary Oak
I just want to give big thanks to Safire Ink for editing this story :3
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An interesting story. The concept has been done before, and done a lot better, however this was a pretty interesting story and whilst there were quite a few fairly glaring errors, those errors didn't stop me from reading to the end of the story. Your writing also made it easier to empathise with the characters involved, and I thought the bit about Rumble's Brother was an interesting subplot that could perhaps be explored a little more thoroughly. Would you like a more in-depth critique?
With regards, CC
Aww, this is so sweet!
This story did carry along errors that could be easily edited, but the story you conveyed is very heartwarming indeed~ This is the first time I've read a Scootaloo next to my own, and It's like a whole 360 in the direction I took it, haha. Makes mine look like pure evil.
Use the Force, Luke
I have a feeling that it all went, well, too fast. There were also some mistakes, like missing commas and periods. The most jarring, however, were characters' names' misspellings, like Apple Jack instead of Applejack and Spit Fire instead of Spitfire.
And also, there were some changes in the story tense, for example:
This one is in past tense, but few lines later we have present:
There are some nice ideas here. Dashie being with Scoots in a spiritual sense (in more ways than one) is pretty cool. You do need to work on punctuation, proper word use (Rarity carrying a sad tune? You meant tone, right?) Past and present tense confusion. That sort of thing.
Chill. I'm not really ragging on you.)
One other thing; Who's Madden? (Not John Madden. Please oh please.
Overall, it's good for what it intended to be. Just keep working on the points that I and others in this comments column have pointed out and you'll be a better writer.
3564196 Sure, I definitely would.
3564395 Thank you for the help :) 3564249>>3564216 Thank you both for the help. Thank you.
Concept overused. Execution poorly eggxecuted. Grammar errors/typos everywhere. Way too quick pacing. Unused plot devices.
4/10
Wait, thats what i was gonna say if i was a heartless meanie cheater cheater cheater bitch face.
But im not!
Even with all these errors, i still love this!
....The score is still the same though.
3566783 Eeyup, I'm gonna need a top editor for this one.
Everything Wrong With I Did it All for You Rainbow Dash
(Spoilers)
(duh)
That isn't being a fan, that's obsession. +1
Also, sometimes you need to put a dot at the end of the sentence, i know commas and all that, but im not gonna go there. +1
+1
OH COME ON! +1
OH COME ON!² +1
Just a question, why did the other CMCs do absolutely NOTHING, while Twilight told Scootaloo and she ran away? Like, did they stop existing? Because we never heard from them again.+1
How did he guess she was in the Everfree Forest? You didn't made it clear how he found her there, so he just...guessed? +1
No you're not, you had a typo in your sentence. +1
Let me understand this, isn't the Wonderbolts like the Navi Blue Angels or somethin'? They're supossed to be some kind of aerial military, and if you win a FAWKING RACE THAT MEANS YOU'RE IN!? +1
That's what she said. +1
Let me see if i understand this, there's no rules, you can literally cheat to enter the military? Wow, the Wonderbolts are more incompetent than i thought. +1
TORTOISE. +1
T on tank is capitalized. +1
+1
Intresting but unused plot device. +1
Are they allowed to eat mustard at the race? +1
"Wins by an inch" cliché. +1
Im surprised too that no one trying to CHEAT since there are NO RULES. +1
This ending is too emotional for me..Yeah, thats a sin now. +1
Sin Tally: 19
Sentence: Rainbow Dash wins by a landslide. (Literally)
3568299
So hilarious!
I should give it the random tag for this, lol.
3568349
Next time you're gonna write Tank, remember.
T-O-R-T-O-I-S-E
3568358 k
im leaving the fandom
Not bad. But it needs an editor.
So, I read this story. It wasn't bad. I think there is some potential in the story. I felt that there could have been more depth into Scootaloo's training. I felt that you could have gone into more detail with that show us the work and time and effort she put into being the best Wonderbolt. I would have like to see that. How she turned from a kid to an adult so quickly and so suddenly. You could do an entire story just on her trying to follow in Rainbow Dash's hoofsteps.
I felt that Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom could have been more involved and again, that goes into expanding the Scootaloo training. They could be like her support and they she the changes with her and they sympathize with her and want to help her.
The race bothered me a bit. The whole no rules thing was a little odd to me and I would have liked more detail in the race. In a race like that with no rules, I was expecting something a little dastardly, but it worked out. I would have like to see more into Rumble's brother. I thought that would have been interesting.
The ending was a sweet one and the whole Rainbow Dash being spiritually there for her was nice. It gave us a nice ending that touched us.
The premise was good, but I think with a little more detail it would have turned out pretty good.
Hope this review helps and I hope to see more from you in the future.
Take care.
Decent.
This is story could use some tweaking though. 
THIS IS SO GOOD!!!
p.s. i was gonna show a rainbow-dash, but
x2
3577278
No. Just...no.
Don't you DARE pick a quote from the brony community series.
Just no.
I had the same thing happen to me during my senior year in high school, my step-dad passed away two days before my birthday. I heard about it after getting home after school, he had died due to a heart attack, I wanted to drop everything and leave everything that I had fought so hard for behind me, but I knew that doing so would displease him even in death, so I kept going and I still keep going, I do it to honor his memory, and for as long as I live, I will stand in his place to support the family, I decided to take his responsibilities upon my shoulders, helping to pay bills, paying rent, getting food in the house and everything that he had to do.
3568349 You get extra points for taking that review with a healthy dose of humility. That will get you very far in life.
Dude this was really good I loved it first fic to really makes cry since MLD at least cry like this good job bro good job
4150528 I've been thinking of adding more depth to the story.
4154255 do it man I loved it and I'm sure adding more would be great
4154696 Okay :3
Geesh! What did zippy and that other dude say? Must've been preeety offensive.
4650427 Oh no, they were just have a random convo in my comments so I deleted it. <:)
5120378 Ha, thanks. I really have to make this story a little better. There are some elements missing that I would like to implement when I have them together. But thanks for the fav and enjoying the story thus far.
I would advise that you go more in depth in this story but I do like it. Your story is the first one ever that made my eyes water. Great ending, you get a fave, and upvote and a watch.
5251601 Oh yes, I'm going to do that. Hopefully soon. I'm glad that you still enjoyed it regardless. :D
Wow great story. The Scootaloo's reaction does seem a bit clichéd but realistic and not half bad, full good. Rainbow Dash coming back as some guardian angel did work good for the emotional level and was a bit interesting. But if this is your first story then dam! That fact alone makes you a great writer. I'll look forward to reading more of you.
5998931 You really think so? Well I thank you very much for your comment although I don't think I'm a great writer and I think I really only have gotten worst. But I still thank you for this comment and appreciate your follow. ^^
7631112 Thanks so much for reading this. ^^ Yeah, it is sad.
No rules? Pushing each other off the tracks? That would have made Lightning Dust's day.