• Member Since 2nd Jul, 2014
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CrackedInkWell


"Inspiration does not come to the lazy. It only comes to those who call it." - P. I. Tchaikovsky

E

Warning: the following story is currently unedited.


Silver Tray was certain that he was going to be fired for sure. In all the years he had been as a waiter for the meals of the Royals, he had made a mistake that got him yelled at by Prince Blueblood. He was certain that his years of stability were over. But as he was preparing to leave the palace, Celestia comes to see if everything is alright.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 9 )

That was very, very excellent. It's nice to see the staff getting some love.

It is rare to see castle staff being portrayed this vividly in fics, so kudos on that front.

Lets get the good parts out of the way. First, the rant felt real, as if an actual person was pouring their soul out in front of a person they fully expect to be ignored by. It painted a good picture of the waiter's life and his struggle before comparing it to the luxury he sees before him. All in all, the POV character feels like a person telling a short story and does so pretty convincingly imo.

now for the bad. only one thing really, massive text walls. At the beginning and a little past the half way mark you had a series of large paragraphs that can make wanting to read through everything a little harder. Breaking it up with an extra action or maybe a response from Celestia may have helped.

all in all, great story, I hope to see more like it soon.

That is something only offered up to people. I’m not people, Your Majesty.

This line, I think, is the heart of the entire story. And the fucked up part is how many people still feel this way.

Especially from the employer side.

11661400
As bad as it is from the employer side, it's also bad from the employee side of the equation. Folks going into a line of work and believing that they're a disposable commodity who'll never amount to anything else.

11661412
Oh, absolutely. But as this shows, when it's the employee who feels this way, there's a chance to break the cycle, or at least mitigate it.

When it's the employer, you get a whole other raft of abuses, intentional and otherwise, all quietly justified by "it's not like they're real people anyways." Things that make Blueblood look like Boss of the Year material.

And that's the end that not only perpetuates the cycle, but ensures that the employees never forget their place.

Very very good. If the "currently unedited" sign wasn't there, I wouldn't have noticed.

My only critique is that there should be some padding between the moment Silver Tray gets to his room and when Celestia arrives. As is, it feels too sudden

Fun read, I always love stories where the protagonist is a butler of a member of the rich family staff. For what I understand of the servant system in history that the employer doesn't EVER concern themselves with their staff save occasionally their majordomo and it's that person job to keep the employer and employees words as separate as possible. Fun read I hope you do more of those.

This is what makes Celestia a good ruler, she knows she doesn't know everything and ino s things need to change and have a shakeup every so often to avoid things getting complacent and bad habits need to be rooted out, such as servants fearing her and nobles forgetting they who they work for. How many political problems stem politicians forgetting they work for the people? From people not saying what needs to be said? They are historical issues that always repete and will always need to be addressed.

A little rough in places, as you mentioned at the start of the story

but you DEFINITELY have a good premise here, truth be told, there's only a few stories I can actively think of that don't involve "MANE CAST", oh there are those that are about Bon Bon or Lyra or any number of secondary/tertiary characters or any number of OCs, but those that deal with the absolute back-of-the-back background characters like this are definitely very few and far between so kudos for that.

I work foodservice IRL so there are days where I can understand Silver Tray's POV, sure I don't serve self-important putzes or Karens, but it can be tiring to do rote tasks, and it can be hectic during lunch rush, and if I showed up to work after (as hypothetical examples) losing my dog or my parents, I have a distinct feeling that while my immediate coworkers or supervisor might care a bit, the HR folks and system at large would be "quit your bellyaching and do your job".

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