• Member Since 23rd Nov, 2017
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Uz Naimat


Aspiring author and artist from Africa. (Patreon!)

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The spell was lifted, her friends had been sent home, and her student had learned her lesson. 

In theory, everything should be fine. At least, that’s what Twilight kept telling herself. The Fiducia Compelus episode was nothing more than a mistake, and once apologies were handed out tomorrow, everypony would be able to put it behind them. Everything was absolutely fine

Why, then, were there sobs coming from Starlight’s room?


Featured: 04/26/2024 - 04/29/2024
Behind-the-page: Relapse
Proofread and edited by: JinxJTL

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 25 )

Thank you… just… thank you.

This is absolutely beautiful. It's something Starlight was sorely lacking in the canon version of "Every Little Thing She Does", reget.

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I mean I wouldn’t say she LACKED it per se, but yeah, adding this type of scene into the actual show could’ve worked. Oh but of course we had to make room for the “hilarious” gags.

Hundreds of memories flashed through Twilight’s mind in an instant - the parasprite incident, her brother's wedding, her first Winter Wrap-Up, the time loop episode. In fact, her career as Celestia’s student had begun with an uncontrollable burst of magic. But among all those incidents, one stood out.

I would like to point out that her brothers wedding shouldn't even be on that list of "disappointing Celestia". If anything, Celestia not only disappointed Twilight (or more accurately, should have disappointed Twilight) but nearly disappointed and destroyed all of Equestria if she only just gave Twilight a moment or her time, along with her friends and family.

I'm always gonna hold a grudge for that episode.



Anyways, great story.

Scyphi #5 · April 26th · · 1 ·

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I think it was more of a case the writers just didn't want the episode getting too emotionally heavy or serious. After all, the show was still being written for kids in mind, technically. Further G4 always did have this annoying trend of shying away from exploring these sort of scenarios with any meaningful depth.

That all said, I feel like Starlight shows more regret for her past actions than she's getting credit for here. Just because she doesn't wear that regret on the cuff of her sleeve perpetually after her reformation doesn't mean she didn't have any, much less a significant amount. :raritywink:

Comment posted by stixie deleted April 27th

I remember this episode and exploring it like this was good,

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You’re welcome and I’m glad you enjoyed it. Oh, as to why we don’t get these things in the show proper, Friendship is Magic remains a comedy-adventure show. That’s the primary genre and it cannot afford to stray too far by adding it heavy introspection scenes. But fear not, fanfiction exists to fill in the blanks!

11888944
Why, thank you for the very kind complement. Between this and Ladybugs Awake, I’ve developed a penchant for writing missing scenes in the show.

11888984
Glad you enjoyed the story.

As for why I included “A Canterlot Wedding” in Twilight’s list of blunders, it’s because Twilight herself thinks it’s a blunder. She was eventually vindicated, yes, but in the moment, Celestia was angry. Hence why I included it.

But I get it. The Season 2 finale did strike a chord in the fandom, and it’s okay if you don’t agree.

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Exactly! Starlight shows a lot of regret, even well into Season 9. Just because it’s not obvious doesn’t mean it’s not there. And yeah the show does tend to explore themes at surface-level only. It starts with the pilot; do you any idea how much potential the Celestia-Luna rift has?

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Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it.

came across this in self promotions.

I thought it was very well written. Flawlessly, in fact.

on a very superficial skim, I wanted a lil' more edge from your Starlight, and more direction to the story overall. Nothing made me stop and say 'omg', but then I am a Pinkie fave, so I need madness in my fics to pick up on any subtlety. I will bear you in mind, though, and t-up, as you can clearly write up a storm!

Great story and work with Twilight and Starlight's bond and relationship. It's quite something how a story I wrote used this premise and also played it for drama, yet your version still handed it quite differently. From the angles used to tackle Starlight's feelings and her reasons, as well as the emotional condition Starlight was in compared to my version.

“Once upon a time, there was a unicorn who loved magic more than anything in the world. Her raw power was unparalleled, but wild and uncontrolled.”

Looks like Twilight learned from Celestia even more than she could know, given how Celestia used a very similar opening to that story she told Twi in the season seven premiere.

On a side note:

As for why I included “A Canterlot Wedding” in Twilight’s list of blunders, it’s because Twilight herself thinks it’s a blunder. She was eventually vindicated, yes, but in the moment, Celestia was angry. Hence why I included it.

that's also how I thought Twilight would feel. One of the tougher parts of writing I feel is suspending how I think a character "should" feel due to my own bias and have them talk or act how that character(s) would feel. It's so easy to have characters say how you feel, so it takes considerable discipline and self-awareness (not just writing skill) to successfully keep your personal feelings and opinions out of the characters' mouths and/or actions if they would realistically feel otherwise, or not as strongly as the writer might.

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Thank you for the compliment. And I understand your qualm about Starlight, but I really needed her to be despondent this story.

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And thank you for the kind words. Iʼll confess that, when I read your story, I was a little worried that mine would be too similar. But thankfully, that wasnʼt the case.

As for your second point...

Youʼre right. Twilight thinks itʼs a fiasco, therefore it is. Itʼs also a the entire point of this story. Twilight doesnʼt think the episode was a big deal, but that hardly matters now, does it? Starlight, who went through the experience, thinks itʼs the end of the world.

I’ve seen a lot of Every Little Thing She Does rewrites, but out of all of them, I believe this is one of the best. The story actually explores Starlight’s anger and self-loathing, and literally shows her anger in a physical way (via cracking the floor with her hoof). I love seeing Starlight’s anger and self-hatred shown in-depth, and it shows that despite all of that, she can overcome it one day and be a stronger pony than before. Bonus points.

And Twilight can relate to Starlight in a way as to how she felt disappointing her mentor. That was kinda sweet.

Overall, this story is powerfully emotional and I love it. Take the upvote and I’m placing this in my favorites.

And thank you for the kind words. Iʼll confess that, when I read your story, I was a little worried that mine would be too similar. But thankfully, that wasnʼt the case.

You're welcome:twilightsmile:

Interesting enough, this story feels almost like something of a "what if?" to my version, since if either Spike didn't (literally) slap Starlight out of it when she was starting to fall apart, or if he never went to see her in my version, Starlight could have went on to reach the deeply depressed state she was in your version. Which might be part of the reason this feels similar yet very different at the same time.

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Thank you immensely for the kind words. I aim to please and I’m glad I did.

Oh, and don’t forget - she doesn’t just crack the floor, her horn also acts of its own accord. And yeah, it was always my intention to have Starlight being able to relate to her mentor be the thing that snaps her out of her funk.

Much Love, Great words. Nuff said

“You’re friends with the Spirit of Chaos?”

“I am now. I wasn’t always.” A sigh escaped Twilight as she recalled the days of Tirek’s attack. “Back in the early days of his reformation, he had a relapse so huge it nearly caused the end of Equestria as we knew it.”

Starlight remained silent and Twilight took it as a sign to continue.

“Are you familiar with Tirek’s attack on the ponies?”

A nod of confirmation.

“Did you also know that it was Discord, supposedly reformed, who betrayed Equestria and gave him the means to take over?”

“And you all forgave him for that?” Starlight asked, confusion evident in her voice.

Twilight shrugged. “To be fair, he was also the key to Tirek’s defeat. The event also triggered his redemption for real.”

“I see,” Starlight said.

I hope that Twilight was just as forgiving after the 'Grogar' debacle.

I do wonder if Starlight would have experienced this again after A Royal Problem. I know she did cry during the dream scene. What do you think?

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Thanks!

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I think she was. Discord did single-handedly launch Equestriaʼs counter attack, after all. And Twilight is the forgiving sort, so Iʼd say yes.

11890819
Perhaps, yes. “A Royal Problem” was really hard on her, so I definitely she would still have some issues, even the Sisters did help her.

Good gosh that's wholesome, very nice work.

Reminder to self: set up meeting between Starlight and Sunset.

MLP EG:Mirror Magic

Scroll #22 · May 1st · · ·

You do a good job portraying each character well and within the right time frame. Every example Twilight used to be relatable with her student/friend fit the context of the story. Not once did you use examples ahead of this timeline accidentally.

For my part, I'm glad Twilight was there to help. If it had been me there, I might have stood at the door and uncertain what to say or do that might help. I might care and perhaps can display that, but a lack of social experience would leave me empty of a plan which would make me feel unprepared.

Gosh darn it. Friendship School needs to be a real thing. How often do you think a subject matter like that would have been useful in real life? Functionality isn't the only issue of it too. It's also quality of life.

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Oh, I know. This story takes place before “Mirror Magic”. Also, it’s always been my headcanon that Twilight purposefully set up them up in that special.

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Thank you very much for the kind words.

And yeah, of course Twilight would go in. She’s Starlight’s mentor; this is her job. This is what Twilight meant when she said, “If you’re willing to learn, I’m willing to teach you what I know.” But more than that, she’s Starlight’s friend. I get your point, though; I would’ve frozen up in this situation, too.

Dunno if you’ve noticed, but the examples I chose were also listed in reverse chronological order. Kinda. And the entire story was based off this blog I wrote a while back.

Glad you enjoyed this.

A good addendum to the episode. At the time of watching, it did contribute to some negative feelings about Starlight: the recurring theme of her magically assaulting ponies over and over, never seeming to learn her lesson and sometimes even being encouraged by the results (the Celuna swap episode in particular). This serves doubly well as a fix-fic not only in highlighting her genuine remorse but in gently reminding the viewer she was hardly alone in such antics. Good work!

11900630
Thank you for the compliment.

I tried to best on hit on two points. A. Starlight is far from the only former villain whoʼs messed up post-reformation, and B. Her impulsiveness and over-reliance on magic is bad, yes, but those arenʼt habits that are going to disappear overnight. As heroes, Sunset still has a fiery temper, Discord is still a trickster, Trixie is still arrogant, boastful and reckless.

Iʼm glad enjoyed the story.

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