• Member Since 2nd Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

OneLonelyPickle


Sometimes I write stories.

E

Dear Miss Princess Celestia,

I hope you get this letter okay. Not really sure how you get yer mail, but I'm gonna wrap it nice and fancy so they know it's for royalty. Wouldn't want it to get lost.

Ma and Pa said to send you this letter because it's Family Appreciation Day. They said you like to get letters from fillies and colts across Equestria so you can see how happy everypony is. I think that's mighty sweet of you, Princess.

Now, how do I start this thing?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 13 )

That ending went brrr- :rainbowderp: :raritydespair:

10869985
Sorry, I had to have a little bit of feels in there :(

10869996

The feels were so sudden and well done tho :heart:

10869999
Weird, didn't get a notification for this comment :derpyderp1:

Thank you. I really appreciate the feedback!

Don't want to sound rude, but the ending doesn't do it for me. The reader knows what's going to happen and the story doesn't do anything to subvert it, so you end up with over 3000 words of bracing yourself for what you know is going to happen. Then when it does happen, you're like "Yeah ok."

Either shorten the story, or subvert the expectation.

10870080
That's not rude, that's just feedback (though I understand why you would be worried about stepping on toes as apparently 90% of the writers on this website take everything as a personal insult, from my experience!).

I appreciate your comment. My non-clop fics tend to have divisive opinions, with one side liking what I have done and the other thinking it could have been executed better. It's not up to me as the writer to decide if the story is "good" or "bad"; that's up to the readers. All I can do is write a story that I like, and I like this one (or I would not have published it).

This is a letter written by a kid, so I was not about to make it 60k words long, for what I was going for. I am sorry that it fell flat for you, though. Hopefully the next time you read one of my stories, you will enjoy yourself! Or at the very least, you will feel compelled to provide more useful feedback!

Again, thanks for the input. Take care.

Applejack is such a sweetheart, and I enjoyed reading her letter. The bits of lore you added such as extended family and different characters for an earlier time period were a very nice touch. The ending got to me though because I really dislike thinking about what happened to her parents.

10870264
Thanks person I definitely don't know from an offsite chat program!

By the by, your pfp is cute. CUTE!

For eight years now, I've been trying to write a story where Applejack writes a letter to Celestia to wish her a Happy Mother's Day, because she's basically a mother figure to many ponies, and her own mother obviously isn't in the picture. Eight years, and I've never been able to get it right, or have it done in time to upload in time for Mother's Day.

This reminds me so much of that.

An excellent story: funny, homespun, bright, and bittersweet.

Thank you for writing it.

10870549
Sorry to hear that! I used to be bad for not finishing anything because of really bad perfectionism (quite the oxymoron, huh?). Now I have learned to ignore the nagging OCD and just let my stories have imperfections. As long as people find them entertaining, that's all that matters.

10870652
I appreciate the kind words. Cheers, friend.

10870655
Cool! Thanks!

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