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Elijah was a normal boy, until he decided to eat rat poison. Then, he became a normal dead boy. Since Elijah didn't exactly lead the best life, he had a one way ticket to Hell. However, he is given a chance to redeem himself by being the Guardian Angel of nine lucky (or rather, unlucky) ponies.
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A very silly Self-Insert Idea I had. Man, this is going to be fun.
This won't end well.
Guardian Angel of Derpy? Man, he's gonna be busy...
Using your nammmmme? Hmmm, I'll save this for read laterrr!
Who the hell keeps planting all of these bombs? And how exactly does one dispose of two of them and still not decide to investigate who planted them?
Hahaha funny story nonetheless; I look forward to more chapters. 
i like where this is going .... eating ratpoison and paint? ..... how has the world population of stupid people not diminished yet?
1170405 Exactly what I was thinking.
MOOOOOOOAOR
You magnificent dumbass you!!
1170414
Wait wut?
*clears throat*
Anyway I believe one of these is in place for recivieing
*reclears fer good mesuare*
hua mgh!
"YOU BEAUTIFUL MAGNIFICENT DUMBASS BASTURD YOU!"
MOAR AWESOUME!
1170465 Aw, thank you for those endearing words, you sound just like my mother.
Where is that bomb-planter? I'll get him for trying to hurt ponies!
This is a great story, very funny! Can't wait to see what troubles he has to go through to protect Fluttershy... And I just can't believe that he got away with all of those stupid things he did... 
But reincarnated as a flower? Really? 
Looking forward to more :)
1171373 Huh? Where does it say that? I'll fix it right away if you can tell me.
1171499 Oh, ok. Let me fix that...
This is some of the funniest stuff i've read in awhile.
1171649 Aw, thanks!
baaaad LUCK YAY
Nah, I think he's doing a super duper job.
1188528 I'm doing a fantastic job! So far, no pony died yet! So far.
heheheheheh
ooooo Rarity.....
lol super hell
1189428 It's some serious shit.
Godddd, are you actually like this in real life? Just eating rat poison and setting cottages on fire
1194527 ... Maybe.
1194536
Funnnn! My weekend activities include sitting around my house and calling wolves to attack people, I'M A FUN PERSON!
1170405
hes the person who ate the poison ant paint.
1205797 I'm special that way.
1170519
1205878 bro, as MY mother always told me, you put the Q in qspecial... its a silent q... everyone always says i spell it wrong though...
1209220 Aw, thanks! teeshirtuniversity.com/content/images/my.png
*Reads chapter title*
You are a terrible person.
1248632 Why might you say that?
BASED ON A TRUE STORY
i agree i like this here story
-wargod
Based on a true story huh? Ruining allll the moments by throwing up, and you like Nickelback... Oh dear lord... ANYWAYS! Another great chapter, good job in sewing your hand together, and home economics was terrible for me as well! (things set on fire... So much fire) Great job!
dafuq
1289266 Aw, thanks! What for, may I ask?
1289289 For being such a handsome devil.
i1089.photobucket.com/albums/i341/Urbn47/th_Freaky_Fred-1319344001.jpg
1289318 static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Oh+stop+it+you_4b4fff_3819442.jpg
The funny thing is, that's actually how I look. How's you find my seventh grade school picture?
1289333 It's a long story. A story I haven't thought up yet.
1289333
Funny that's how I imagine the character.
Cept my version has the hair a bit shorter
I don't know about your definition of normal.....But a person who reads a box that says "Rat Poison" and think 'Huh, what a weird name for a cereal, oh well down the hatch.' That person is not normal.
1297592 It was an honest mistake to make!
That was just beautiful. I can't wait to read more
1304937i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/117/014/GsE3k.jpg
i'd suggest checking out my other fics while you wait. They're worth it, if i do say so myself.
dafuq
1332434Is so beauteous, no?
yes let there be no logics fuck yeah fuck you logic