Melody Heart writes a letter to her children, Snow Heart and Frost Heart, telling her daughters her story, her struggles, and how through it all, she found love.
Note for tag: Implied "psuedo" rape. There is no actual rape in this. Just a close call.
This story is my first "Oc" only story.
Melody Heart and Train Tracks are the parents of my main Oc Snow Heart, and I really wanted to write a story about them to show their bond, this story wouldn't have been possible if not for the help of these wonderful people.
LINKS
Milk: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/111082/Milk_Barcast
Xeno: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/334323/Xenophilius+Kunandra
Firefoxino-https://www.fimfiction.net/user/302881/Firefoxino
Cover art by: Little Tigress.https://www.fimfiction.net/user/228967/Little+Tigress
I love you all. <3
Go stalk these amazing people for without them you wouldn't have a story to read!
A good story, short but got the plot across well. I hope those assholes who tried that with Melody Heart there got a nice swift bash to the brains.
10240655
Oh? Do I smell RK getting out his murder bat? lolz.
Don't worry they will be punished.
A nice, sweet story. Uncomplicated, in all the best ways. I'm a sucker for love stories, and happy tears.
Reviewed!
You can just call that attempted rape or sexual assault.
You don't need quotes around this or to have this in your description. The author's note would be a better place for it.
This is also better for the author's note.
You can embed the links to have a neater, decluttered description. I would recommend doing this on all of your stories in the future, and going back and editing all the currently published ones.
Again, probably best for the author's note.
Her foals would know that she's a unicorn.
Remember, there should be a space after those dots.
The last few words are awkwardly phrased and missing a hyphen. Her description isn't relevant, since the cover art shows it and this is a letter to her foals. They know what she looks like. I would suggest getting Grammarly. It's easy to learn to work with for fixing mistakes like this. It also works in FIMFiction comments and PMs too.
She is shouting.
You're using 'swooned' wrong here.
Capitalize Golden Oaks Library.
Don't use dialogue here unless she's speaking. It's not consistent with the bulk of the letter or with the start of the story. Instead, opt for something like italics or the quotes function. Especially since there is a proper scene now.