• Member Since 4th May, 2013
  • offline last seen 7 hours ago

Estee


On the Sliding Scale Of Cynicism Vs. Idealism, I like to think of myself as being idyllically cynical. (Patreon, Ko-Fi.)

T

Realistically, those whose parties wake a Princess from her slumber should expect consequences. But Celestia simply wants to get some sleep, and so her chosen solution is a simple one: deal with it through not dealing with it. It's quick, easy, and sends the problem down the road.

On an equally realistic note, a Princess who decides to make consequences into somepony else's problem should probably expect a few of her own.

Return To Sender. Address Extremely Known.



(Part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group: new members and trope edits welcome. Takes place after Triptych itself.)

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 108 )

traveling cloud party

The bane of my existence. . . .

because being a donkey adolescent was partially about soul-crushing rejection and so it was best to start early.

Sad but true.

Don't kill him, Pinkie," the white mare cautioned.

"I wasn't going to --"

"-- because I am calling dibs," the virtual corpse added. "Also, I will need that cloudwalking spell. First, if you would."

Always good to call dibs. That way there’s no confusion when the massacre starts.

"YEAH!" Turnbuckle happily shouted as the first billow of smoke ruffled his short fur. "NOW KISS!"

There are probably worse last words. . . .

“We notched words in tree bark. With our teeth. After marching two gallops to a message tree. Through the snow.”

Huh, that’s what school was like for me, too. In high school I was trusted with a knife, and that made carving in the message tree much easier.

There was a dancing yak, which was truly unusual because yaks generally didn't do that in public.

Not out of shame, mind you, just consideration for the imperfect and easily smashed.

"-- because I'm still trying to give you some level of normal life and you can't have one if you're just worrying about the past all the time --"

After the first few times, it doesn't mean they won't worry, Tia. It just means they don't know what to worry about, which is so much worse.

"Uphill. Both ways."

"Which happened fairly often when Discord was rearranging things on an hourly basis. Like the length of an hour."

Amazing, the kinds of innocuous events that can lead to something important. This took an unexpected turn, but a very welcome one. These two need this talk more than pretty much anything aside from a good night's sleep. Here's hoping it's the first of many. Thank you for a great read, Estee. See you next decade (or tomorrow. :derpytongue2:)

...along with a carefully-wrapped pattern of power-channeling silver wire.

Uh, oh. That won't last.

"So we're looking at the next generation," that silhouette said.

God save Equestria.

Hey, an Estee story!

Realistically, those whose parties wake a Princess from her slumber should expect consequences. But Celestia simply wants to get some sleep, and so her chosen solution is a simple one: deal with it through not dealing with it. It's quick, easy, and sends the problem down the road.

Oh no, it's going to be sad somehow.

10011372

God save Equestria.

{Berry}"What's a god?"{/Berry}

(The other option was "Said every single adult generation, eventually.")

"Look," the cyan reasonably proposed, "I'm not saying we should murder all of them. Just enough to set an example."

RAINBOW DASH IS BEST PONY.

Nice to know those two have started to get back on speaking terms. Even if they seem to be avoiding at least one issue.

"YEAH!" Turnbuckle happily shouted as the first billow of smoke ruffled his short fur. "NOW KISS!"

To quote another character, YEAH!!!

"Want to share the bed?" Celestia proposed, and kept every word encased within a completely false innocence.

Oh, you tease. I hope you choose to write that story.

I'm just happy they're actually talking again. I would absolutely read that story. Shipping in the 'verse is amazing, as AJ and Snowflake keep demonstrating.

Pinkie and Dash both being professionally critical was an excellent moment, but I anticipate that calling Pinkie fat may end poorly for anyone who ever wants pastry in their life again. She knows ponies.

"-- because somepony needs to make sure the cycle keeps going! It's why we have Bearers --" which was when the words finally sunk in. "One hit? One hit? Do you even know what taking a dive is? Making the enemy underestimate you, learning more of their plans, getting into position for --"

...That's a cheap retcon, but I'll accept it. I really don't see why she can't be bad at fighting though; it's not like any of our political leaders are expected to be and she had Luna. That's like, three Alicorns and at least one of them is of Death.

Actually, hold on; have there been more Bearers? I'd assumed no, because there wasn't any evidence of that and also that lack of evidence insinuates that Celestia is eliminating them from the record and I don't want to think that of her.

"-- because I'm still trying to give you some level of normal life and you can't have one if you're just worrying about the past all the time --"

This trope usually makes me angry because it generally feels like an excuse as opposed to a justification, and to a measure it is here; but it's at least justified because it's Twilight Sparkle. It could have backfired and made her worse, but she got lucky and here we are.

"You really want to go on missions with us?"

I mean, there's more wiggle room now. Sure, it'd be bad if they got hurt but it's automatically the apocalypse. And sweet Celestia I need them to do that. I don't know if its what the 'verse needs but I need this.

"Want to share the bed?" Celestia proposed, and kept every word encased within a completely false innocence.

As far as sounds went, "..." was the closest approximation of Twilight's breath locking down within her throat.

"It's a big bed. Since it fits me. There's a little room left over."

"...ggggg..."

Placidly, "I can also make my own torch."

Her former student kicked her.

IT'S NOT A HUG BUT I'LL TAKE IT:raritystarry:

Klishe......... is....? Is that a pun on cliché? *starts slow clap* Beautiful.

Nice title! Very accurate!

And wooo! Working feelings out!

...

Well, at least the makers of the device know it works, I guess.

It's good to see Celestia and Twilight getting back to good terms, and sure, I'll definitely ship it.

"I'm starting to feel a little irritated," declared a small purple possibly-phantom alicorn. "I get grouchy when I don't sleep." The corona around her horn surged to another level, then added two more layers of glowing spikes. "I wonder why."

You're old

Three rules of Rock & Roll
1) Play good & loud
2) You can't play good, play LOUDER!
3) It's too loud, you're too old
With the footnote "Some people were born too old

Celestia snorted as she dropped her pace. "You think we had scrolls ? Scrolls hadn't been invented yet! We notched words in tree bark. With our teeth. After marching two gallops to a message tree. Through the snow."

This was just too much fun to read!

It might of been over quicker if Twilight and company sent the cloud further West but then we wouldn't of had a story. Celestia of course didn't listen to her guards about where she was sending it SHE Just wanted it GONE

"Your pardon,"

My personal narrator got unidentifiably posh before I got to the words "white unicorn".

"Rainbow? Get the night weather team together. I want you all to blow this thing towards Canterlot.

This is where the laughter really kicked in.

"So this time," the police chief declared, "we're following them."

And that's where it stopped.

This isn't set at New Year's, but it's still got fireworks.

using silver wire to connect gramophones with huge hollow cones: she presumed they'd succeeded at the moment the semi-music got that much louder.

Gramophones? Gramophones?!

Real pegasi cloud raves use lightning the way Hurricane and Faust intended!

:derpytongue2:

<Deep Breath> FINALLY! THEY'RE TALKING! Keep it up, Twi and Celly

10011461
My personal headcanon as to what happened with Celestia vs. Chrysalis* is that like Superman or Spider-Man she not only tries to avoid killing her opponents but also tries to defeat them with minimum necessary harm. With over a thousand years of experience reading opponents, she's usually very good at judging exactly how much power she needs to win. But in that instance, she badly misjudged and used far too little power because Chrysalis herself didn't know how powerful she'd become from Shining Armor's love.

*Canon Celestia, Tryptich Continuum Celestia is far, far more ruthless.

:rainbowlaugh: there were several points where i was actually laughing too hard to see the screen.
amazing!!!

course then it got serious and even better.

wonderful work as always

10011607
ok... ive never seen that before but that is too damn cool. also that will now be my head cannon forever for pegasi raves. thank you for that

If it had to be described, it would have gone something like bum-dum-dum-scum-dum . It vibrated fur. It shook the borders of her semi-tangible tail. It was actually very easy to describe and after having done so, the typical pony brain would just keep going with it until one of two things was eliminated: the source or the pony.


Just about the only thing she could truly hear was the in-flight musical anti-entertainment, which occasionally used the pauses within the beat (because the beat always paused just long enough to make her think it might be stopping, and then it laughed at her) to talk about sex and sex and sex and sex and, just for the occasional change of topic, makeup sex. Two minutes in the air was enough to convince her that it had been the only way for the composers to locate any words which rhymed with each other and somehow, they'd still messed up the meter.

Hmmm. Sounds suspiciously like...

I wonder how many of these kids are going to like it when they find themselves blacklisted by a certain fashionista for this? I doubt they even had a clue when sober that they were antagonizing and why that would have been a bad idea.

10011461

One thing to keep in mind: this argument is taking place in front of witnesses. Celestia's a little better at automatically covering for herself than Twilight is. She's not going to necessarily say every detail of the full truth in public. It's not necessarily so much retcon as it might be 'the kids are right over there.'

In terms of how Celestia is treating the word, "Bearers" is being used as a substitute for "heroes."

Also, based on the smoothness of the other flight, you can pretty much assume that Twilight is running on full Rainbow mode right now. No filter.

10011461

Actually, hold on; have there been more Bearers? I'd assumed no, because there wasn't any evidence of that and also that lack of evidence insinuates that Celestia is eliminating them from the record and I don't want to think that of her.

This is a Continuum fic, so the answer is spoilery. Be very sure you want to know about the wider continuum before deactiving this spoiler-bloc.

Celestia and Luna didn't actually use the entire set of Elements of Harmony on their own; that's just a myth that Celestia has allowed to propagate for reasons that have yet to be cleared up in canon. In fact, they were part of their own original group of Element Bearers during the Age of Discord. During the battle, the two sisters accidentally turned themselves into Alicorns, whilst the other Bearers were left as they were. They all died, although we don't yet know if it was from natural causes or not, and now only the sisters remember that they ever existed. We don't know why they covered up the existence of the other Bearers; it might have been part and parcel of their efforts to conceal that "alicorn ascension" is a thing, but we just don't know.

"YEAH!" Turnbuckle happily shouted as the first billow of smoke ruffled his short fur. "NOW KISS !"

The scary thing is, Turnbuckle's interruption was probably one of the best things that could've happened at that moment for both neurotic alicorns.

The breakfast was a quiet affair. Most of the ponies lacked the strength to do more than basic speech, and many would have Given Up on Life were it not for a combination of Wake-Up Juice and sugar. Even Pinkie was mostly silent as she munched on her pancakes, which were slathered in maple syrup and-- not pleasant to watch be eaten.

Princess Luna emerged into the room and looked down the table with her usual imperious gaze. That gaze was severely shaken by Pinkie's eating habits, but she soldiered on until she found who she was looking for. "Spike Twinkle. I require your aid."

Spike looked up, an action mirrored by those whose brains were still allowing them to hear. "Uh, yeah?"

"This way."

Princess Luna turned and left, forcing Spike to get up and rush after her. "Wait-- what's the emergency? Your highness," he added a moment too late. The last time they'd talked Princess Luna had insisted on a certain level of informality, but he didn't know if the rules were different at the castle around her guards and staff. Celestia had always made sure they referred to her respectfully in front of others and the Solar Princess was-- easier going, felt safe to say. Spike wasn't afraid of Luna, but the way she carried herself made it feel like she was a little above most of the people he talked to. She felt older and more dramatic than her sister, some times. Especially more dramatic.

He definitely wasn't going to say that one out loud.

"You are Twilight Sparkle's younger brother, are you not?" The princess said. "There are certain... duties, you must fulfill."

Duties?

Spike thought back to the last time they'd spoken. He'd said that he was scared of Twilight slipping, of her growing more and consumed with her projects and books and barriers that she'd lose her self and--

And Luna had said it wouldn't happen. She'd said;

"She will not." And that had been a statement.

There was another who had made most of his speeches as statements, and Spike had learned to loathe the confidence which declared the world to be something it was not.

But this was Luna.

"How do you know?"

Simply, "Because she is protected."

And that had been enough. So he squared his shoulders and nodded. "What do you need me to do, your highness?"

Princess Luna looked down at the drake and softly snorted. "Our duties as the younger are to our older kin, to be there when they fall short of perfection."

They were arriving at the doors to the Solar Chambers. He hesitated, but Luna pressed forwards and forced him to catch up. He stood in the doorways and stared.

Twilight was sharing a bed with the older alicorn, and both of them were completely dead to the world. Celestia (and it was hard to think of her with a title right then) clung Twilight with all her forelegs and one wing, and Twilight had nestled under her kneck like a baby bird. Due to the size difference, it was impossible not to think of the little alicorn as some kind of stuffed animal that the older used for comfort. Off to the side was an empty plate and both of them had smudges on their mouths. Celestia was even drooling a little.

"Sometimes," Luna quietly said, "being the younger can be very rewarding."

Spike looked up at his fellow younger sibling, watched the predatory smile flow across her face-- and felt the same kind of draconic smile on his own. "Okay," he began, "the problem with photographing them is the lighting, but if you can fit sleeping masks over them without waking them up..."

10011607
Pegasi can't stream lightning continuously, thunderclouds would have to be limited to percussion. That said, I bet wind instruments are interesting...

I also bet most audiences aren't expected to survive a real Pegasi music concert.

Yeeeeess, excellent.

Ship-teasing or just friendshipping, I have an infinite appetite for Twilight and Celestia feeling out a more equal relationship.

Wow... just wow... This story is incredible in so many ways.

Five.
If we institute the draft to increase our military forces, Equestria can be involved in a five-front war and still have some chance of winning.
Also, if all else fails, I can simply threaten to never raise Sun again.
Sure, some sapients will just say that I'm killing everything on the planet out of pettiness, but they'd be missing the point. It would also let me get some sleep.

This is a mood and a half.

Angry Celestia is baller.

Excellent drama. The catharsis was needed. Very exciting to see these developments, for Twilight to get on a more even level with Celly. And the teasing was hilarious.

…which was when the words finally sunk in. "One hit? One hit? Do you even know what taking a dive is? Making the enemy underestimate you, learning more of their plans…

The semi-regular poker game the Bearers ran was not open to new players. Five invitations were made by the hostess in a purely verbal fashion, with only the sixth being sent a scroll. Due care was taken to ensure that who ever put themselves forward as host was not inconvenienced. The first two to bust (or on rare occasions, cash out), became the primary members of the clean-up crew. The first game in the cloud house managed to convince everypony that providing snacks was to be shared amongst them all. For the most part, the residents of Ponyville ignored it. Although Miranda Rights had been called that one time that the ice-storm and Royal Canterlot Voice had threatened the structural integrity of the buildings neighboring the Boutique.

Seven sat at the table, watching as the golden field of the eighth raked forth the pot from the final grouping of the night.

“To answer the question you are all trying to form,” Celestia said, “I spent the first hour losing to you so I could learn your tells.”

“Damnit! I spent the whole night, sitting. On a chair. On the GROUND. And I still lost!” Rainbow said.

“Indeed. Now, we did agree to raise the stakes, so the time has come to discuss your forfeits. Rainbow... You may keep your signed Wonderbolts program. If I ever decided to start a collection, I could simply order them to sign whatever I wanted. Up to, and including, my own flank. Instead, you can spend a week working for the Canterlot weather team. The updrafts over the carnivore restaurants need renewing.

“Rarity, the Gala is coming up again, and I haven’t a thing to wear. I’m sure you can find the time for my commission.

“Applejack, I’ll need to borrow your coltfriend…”

“Now wait just a darn minute!”

“Not for that! I wouldn’t dream...” She caught the smirk on Luna’s face out of the corner of her eye. “I only dream about it on very rare occasions. No, I had planned to have Snowflake look over the calisthenics program the guards use. I believe we need a more forward-thinking approach to training the guard.”

“...He’d probably really enjoy that,” she grumbled.

“Pinkie Pie, A’s your foster parents are the worlds foremost authority on the subject, I shall ask them to teach our pastry chefs how to make Princess Cake. Don’t worry, I’ll procure the Durian. But it might be wise for you to escort it from its homeland.”

“Awww... I’m gonna have to spend days smelling it. The mayor is going to kick me out of Ponyville again.”

“Fluttershy. After reclaiming some swamplands, a frontier town in the south has been overrun by ibises. They are wrecking havoc on their compost piles and trash cans. Would you go down and persuade them to move on?”

“...Ibis? ...Oh dear. ...stupid, smelly, grumpy, bin chickens...”

“I’ll take that as a yes. Luna...”

“If you recall correctly, I did not agree to your terms. I played with only my original stake, and lost on my own merit. That means I am not subject to your forfeit.”

“...I just wanted to say that you’re no fun. And this,” Celestia stuck out her tongue, “PPfffttbtbttbtbtbtbtbtbtbtbtbbbb.” And blew an impressive amount of air, and a not insignificant amount of saliva across it.

“Which just leaves Twilight.”

“I know. You want me to clean your en-suite. I’ll start now, shall I?”

“That would be ideal. But to properly clean it, you will need to unclog the toilet first.”

Twilight took the proffered plunger, and stoically trudged from the dining room. After a few moments the sound of galloping hooves on marble could be heard. “Three... Two... One...” Celestia counted down. Twilight crashed through the doors. “Ice-bucket,” she finished as Twilight stuck her muzzle in it and started dry-retching.

“By Discord’s talons,” Twilight shouted as she came up for air, “what have you been eating for the past moon to leave that?”

“Dashie, we are never starting a prank war with the sun goddess,” Pinkie whispered.

“I don’t know. There is something to be said for setting yourself a challenge,” Rainbow whispered back.

10011482

Is that a pun on cliché?

Better: it's the actual Russian translation.

(I wanted the local yaks to have a Russo-Slavic flavor. Still debating what their official language is going to be, but it'll be nice to use Cyrillic.)

When I saw the short description talking about a “traveling cloud party,” I immediately had the mental image of the FF7 crew casually running around Equestria barging into ponies’ homes and looting their materia and Phoenix downs.

Celestia snorted as she dropped her pace. "You think we had scrolls? Scrolls hadn't been invented yet! We notched words in tree bark. With our teeth. After marching two gallops to a message tree. Through the snow."

This "...really," was considerably more dubious.

"Uphill. Both ways."

Does Equestria even have shoeboxes? Or Motorways?

There is a grand ballroom in the castle, meant for the adolescent children (the really young ones have another one. It is popular.) and other hangers-on of visiting foreign dignitaries and their hosts, to amuse themselves in while the adults talk business. It was last booked (voluntarily) for its intended purpose somewhere around 350 years ago, by a distant relative of Mudbriar. Celestia keeps it stocked with the very latest in entertainment devices, and donates the devices (inevitably still in their sealed packages) to orphanages across the country once they fall out of fashion.

Down in the potato cellar, there is a suspiciously unrepaired hole in the wall to an older (but still structurally sound) section containing a decommissioned mead hall. For dozens of generations, no adult pony in the castle has known about it (and only a few youths have wondered how that is possible). It always contains a selection of filled kegs someone else must have managed to smuggle down from somewhere (with the alcohol content of raw grape juice). It is dusty, dark and cold, and sees heavy use.

Oh how appropriate for New Year's Eve and those night raving parties... :raritydespair:

A delightful bit of work, and it's great to see Celestia and Twilight starting to talk it out.

The business of Celestia taking a dive _is_ a bit of a weak retcon, but I'll buy it given that the Triptych-verse is sort of stuck with canon up through season three, none of the other occasions on which she ended up useless or a Damsel in Distress have happened yet, and probably won't happen.(If only because Estee is more interested in writing his own stories than in recycling canon: heck, the first Equestria Girls movie takes place chronologically right after season three, while it's been six and a half years since Estee started "Triptych" and Sunset Shimmer has only just made an appearance).


"It comes from a culture which, over the course of twelve centuries, has assembled what it feels to be a comprehensive musical catalog. Consisting of exactly four backbeats, one of which tradition only permits to be played at weddings. Music which is literally designed to be droned until wedded bliss is found or the bride and groom decide eloping is easier. Due to the number of couples who can't stay awake for sixty hours, this eventually created the original ground-based portion of Las Pegasus. Which, broken down by population, is twelve percent buffalo and one percent renegade ministers."

Had a bad time at the Gathering of Nations Pow-Wow, Estee? :twilightsmile:

Fudge, this ended adorably somehow. I liked the carrying a torch metaphorically and literally at the end :rainbowlaugh:

Also... as much of a nuisance as they were, they were technically legally in the right? It reminded me of Ron White's "I wasn't drunk in public, I was drunk in a bar and they threw me into public" (paraphrasing)

"Shove harder," the police chief ordered. "And shove east ."

oh, NOW i understand the title! :facehoof: :rainbowlaugh: :derpytongue2:

Celestia snorted as she dropped her pace. "You think we had scrolls? Scrolls hadn't been invented yet! We notched words in tree bark. With our teeth. After marching two gallops to a message tree. Through the snow."

This "...really," was considerably more dubious.

"Uphill. Both ways."

Two mares giggled.

classic!

and this old story comes to mind:
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/76799/1/a-goddesss-wake-up-call/a-goddesss-wake-up-call

10011785
Two words: PEGASI ORCHESTRA. Think of bell ringers, only with lightning bolts. Or a steel drum big band…

10011785

Pegasi can't stream lightning continuously, thunderclouds would have to be limited to percussion.

Pish posh. As any pegasus musician knows "singing bolts" can be dozens of thousands of volts, but the actual current is quite negligible. Hardly beyond the skills of a musician trained in circular discharging.
:rainbowdetermined2:

Something like this I would imagine:

I also bet most audiences aren't expected to survive a real Pegasi music concert.

10012415

Two words: PEGASI ORCHESTRA. Think of bell ringers, only with lightning bolts.

It has been often commented that pegasi and yaks share a kindred spirit when it comes to cutting loose and celebrating. A careful study in Pre-Unification Musical Theory and Equestrian/Yakistani Warfare will show that the difference between a pegasus cloud rave or a yak operatic ballet and outright warfare is that the war must be conducted according to the rules and limits ratified by the League of Sapients.
:derpytongue2:

Did not expect such a heartwarming ending. Excellent as always. Happy New Year, Estee.

10011778
That gaze was severely shaken by Pinkie's eating habits, but she soldiered on

:rainbowlaugh:

Am I the only one that imagines the music sounding like the Hu?

Login or register to comment