Missions and Bearer responsibilities can mean spending a lot of time away from loved ones, and that's one of the reasons Rainbow has brought Tank (the most awesome pet ever!) along with her to the Trottingham fair. Sure, she'll be stuck at the Meet A Wonderbolt booth for the whole weekend while the rest of the team actually does stuff, but at least she'll have company. And since being at the booth gives her the chance to sleep in, Tank can just use his rotor to go out and grab her some breakfast. Besides, even if something happens to go wrong along the way like, say, having the rotor leaking glow, it'll all work out. Ponyville's perfectly used to this sort of thing.
This isn't Ponyville.
And Trottingham's residents can be a little... off.
(Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.)
Gummy ain't bad at it
A small nitpick I sometimes have is that your narrative voice makes your characters sound weird. The Scrubs pair especially sound just-- off. But by Celestia their voices sound perfect.
Clearly the Triptych Continuum version of Trade Ya
Twilight was at that fair. Or is this a different fair?
So many references to British comedies! I was grinning like an idiot the entire time, but that 'Benny Hill' reference had me on the floor.
Too bad they got the Basil pony instead of the Sybil pony.
Amazing what Rainbow will do to get a quantum of solace. At least it didn't make the sky fall.
Do I perceive a Discworld reference? I think I do.
Edit: So many references. I take it Estee is a fan of british comedy?
There's a whole Ministry devoted to those silly trots, after all.
Heh! Delightful bit of Britain there. Although this being a crackfick, a distinct lack of cameos by characters who might actually be useful. (I understand that down on the marsh end of Trottignham, they have an Earth Pony who can not only walk with, but talk with the animals).
I have no words.
My first thought was: because of course there is.
My second thought was: but why not Faulty Towers? (Faulty Basil, proprietor)
My third thought was: this implies the existence of Pony Barcelona, Pony Spain, and possibly pony paella. And what war don't they talk about?
So many British references! Monty Python, Discworld, James Bond, Fawlty Towers, Scrubs, (not sure I got them all...)!
And a Goosed! reference! ... Now wondering about other cities' histories with Crystal Geese. And how the festival will change once it's discovered that they're extinct again!
Dear reader, if you're reading these comments and dunno what's referencing what, PM me or something.
----
Tank is so good! ... So, I guess Rainbow was at the festival by the time sparks were sent up... Not 100% sure on the timeline, but that's not important. What's important is Tank's Awesomeness!
Does Knobby had a nice little piece of paper he carries around, declaring that he really is a fully sapient pony?
That is just perfect...
Why do I suspect that the local Teleport Gatehouses look like this:
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Except for one that is never in the same place twice, and is bigger on the inside...
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With the device, did nopony suggest turning it off, and turning it back on again?
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Congratulations. And curse you fo so many funny British references .
Anyhow, he'd more or less promised to bring Rainbow some food. Given his word, as it were.
And his word was his bond.
Oh man, that was so British... perfect. Guessing who is doing a cameo is half the fun. Tank is a real trooper here, he deserves that prize.
It would be nice to see a Mane six, oh pardon, MI-6 doing a mission in Trottingham in their usual chaotic manner.
And the Protocean turtle should be featured again. With coconuts. In Ponyville.
Estee? I want you to know that I could actually feel the enormous, shit-eating grin on your face from every single reference, shout-out and joke you threw in here. And Gods help me, I felt the shame burning when I got them all.
This was a thing of terrible beauty. Thank you.
10305934
Yep.
She's one of the few writers on here that can get away with it.
A missed opportunity to title this "The Tortoise a'Fair".
Dash awakens to a martini (shaken, not stirred), an Aston Martin, and a gorgeous mare who
wants to kill herfinds herself incredibly attracted to her...This was a massive pile-up of puns, references, and general silliness... but it had a coherent story going on, with the Chekov's Tortoise Ability established early on, and used at the climax. Tank truly is the best pet!
🐢
So, is it just me, or Are the vets a reference to James Herriot? If So Kudos, That's a Comparatively obscure shout out to a Series of books I loved as a kid (And also a couple of movies I Haven't seen)
I'm surprised Trotter's independent traders didn't make an appearance. They seem to be named for this story.
I have a new favourite Estee story. This references ALL my favourite things. I can see you enjoyed writing this, it’s evident in every turn of phrase and each beautifully converted reference. Absolutely smashing stuff.
Well, from a native of the place: Very, very well done.
Well, let's see... On a first read:
I have this theory that every pony in Ponyville has been klonked on the head by Tank falling out of the sky, because Rainbow Dash keeps forgetting to charge his little propeller thingie. In my head canon, there’s been concussions, holes in roofs, and all kinds of destruction that’s been caused due to shelled animal dropping from a great height like a turtle shaped canon ball.
10306131
Nah, Rainbow Dash would never forget to care for Tank's wellbeing. Ponies passing underneath Rainbow Dash's house would be struck by falling cushions, takeout containers, unwanted dishwater, insufficiently engaging Thaumic Fiction novels, newspapers that posted non-flattering articles and/or photographs of Rainbow Dash, evidence of her losing a bet to any of the other Bearers, half-eaten and long-forgotten sandwiches, long-deceased potted plants, that makeup kit that she refuses to admit she bought and experimented with that one time, Hearth's Warming Gifts that she didn't remember to get enchanted to stay aloft on her cloud, and occasionally even Rainbow Dash herself. But never Tank.
10306159
Agreed. She even got up promptly when Tank needed fed. She likely wouldn't even do that for herself.
10306166
Now, there was that one time that insane militant Alicorn Cultist named Brother Vorbis was supposedly done in by a falling tortoise, but nopony can prove that was Tank. The fact that Celestia was the one who enchanted his rotor-harness shortly before this happened is probably just a coincidence.
10306159
"Occasionally."
Oh no...
I See Where This Is Going.
And I'm automatically assuming this is pony!BRIAN BLESSED.
...
...
!
...
If we don't get the line "CORDON, HE'S ALIVE!" or something, I'm going to be dreadfully disappointed.
...
DANG IT!
Speaking as A British Person, other than the shocking lack of old stallions going down hills in bathtubs, I can attest that this was a 100% accurate representation.
Especially the part about the saxophones.
I don't know what you were worried about, Estee...
Why I can't I favourite this twice?
(You have no idea how much I needed this much of a laugh right about now, Estee - in all seriousness, thank you.)
10306001
I would like to point out something that was observed years and years ago on my local ponythread.
Northern Spy is a sort of apple.
(Yes, i DID compile a thorough list of his adventures, and correctly interpolate what the chorus of seaponies that follow him around sing and no, I'm not afraid to go and dig it out.)
"there was a thing as a disadvantageous recessive"
"there was such a thing as a disadvantageous recessive"?
Oh, excellent. :D
Huzzah!
10305706
I wonder if he's ever bet on Flitter winning a race while trying to keep it a secret from his wife.
how Python-esque
Anyone's bound to pick up a few hobbies given a millennium, even when they have to look after a country whose population constantly teeters on the brink of falling into their own collective navels.
There's an intriguing question. Who's needed something like this in the past? Yes, a pet tortoise is a possibility, but far from the only one.
Oh! Dash got into the 'Bolts at this point! Awesome! I just hope her first show leaves her with a bit more dignity here than in the baseline.
Oh. I may not know the specifics, but I recognize that name.
Note to self: Do not mix Rainbow Dash and Alexa/Google Home/et al.
It will not end well.
No matter what havoc may come from this, this bit is lovely.
It's a lovely morning in the village. There is a horrible goose. But you, you will be worse. Rip and tear, until it is done.
... Hang on, I think I got my notes mixed up at some point.
To be fair, these two are closely associated with chelonian beings of great import.
I think you're drifting into another sketch, as the polearm salesman said to the fighter.
I have no idea where this is going, but I am immediately concerned.
... That is not where I was expecting that to go, but bravo. Especially how you turned him into a Flying Grayson for an extra layer to the pun.
Practically a law of physics there.
The drift from Pratchett to Tolkien was exquisite. The shift to Fleming was equal parts shameless and fantastic.
All told, fantastic hilarity from start to finish. A few of the references escaped me, but it was still great fun. And Rainbow did come out of this better than she did "Newbie Dash." Thank you for it.
About the only reference missing was to Last Of The Summer Wine.
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In my head cannon, Tank is just... used to it. At this point, it's just instinct to pull into his shell when he drops, and his shell is... pretty damn invulnerable. There have been crashes, riccochets that make a pinball machine look tame, klonks on heads... etc... Tank's little shell has been responsible for a lot of destruction because Rainbow just... gets wrapped up in crap, and forgets to recharge that propeller thing. Tank would never get hurt because that shell is so damn strong... but the town on the other hand..... There have been reinforcements made to construction, and walking around town without a helmet when Dash is out with Tank, is an "At your own risk" activity. This is absolutely my head cannon. Rainbow loves the hell out of Tank... BUT... is just forgetful when it comes to that damn magical device.
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/214857/triptych-continuum-rebooted
Put this in the Season 4 folder
10306832
This isn't marked as part of the Continuum.
10306891
It's not?
Then I will move it to the Non Canon Folder.
Thanks for pointing that out
That's rough
Sounds like my parents
10306101
In a sense, yes, though the more direct reference is most likely to the TV series All Creatures Great and Small, which I understand to have been based on his books.
In any case, wonderful bit of silliness. Though, given the name, I'm a little surprised the Trotters didn't put in an appearance, but that might have been a bit too obvious.
10306583
Wait, there was a Tolkien reference? Can you point it out?
Maybe Celestia had done something similar before? Her own pet tortoise (or a friend's), the records lost to time?
Rainbow would probably agree with Knobby on that point
Tank for the win.
10307462
Well, that was a delightful batch of references carried by an adorably determined tortoise on a mission! I especially enjoyed the history of his rotor (and implications of destiny), the gathering crowds, and the ending heroics (with accompanying fireworks.) Nicely done!
10306131
oh, brother, a saxophone player NAMED "Yakety"?!
10307579
Ah. Subtle — I thought that was more All Creatures Great and Small (and the rest of the series).
...There are 2 ways to read that. On the one hoof, she got the age right, but on the other, she didn't know that tortoises hybernate (technically torpor), nor did she realize a proper greenhouse environment can keep a tortoise from torporing.
Not sure if that's canonical but it's a rather accurate description of boot-strap science.
Really must see this sometime! Perhaps another fic.
Totally counts. Not your fault if the customers give inadequate specifications.
Actually had to look that one up.
I see we've transitioned from Pratchett to Adams here.
...This is Nobby Knobs and Sargent Colon from Discworld isn't it? Shoulda seen this coming. I have to say, except for the Python reference, this really SOUNDS like the Discworld characters, and that's most likely a compliment.
There are a lot of problems with getting old. One of the renumerations you receive in exchange is that you can get away with very nearly anything, at least so long as you LOOK old. This is why dying ones hair away from gray or silver is often counter-productive.
...And his name is Tryst. Of course. I assume these guys work at General Veterinary?
Must admit I was a bit confused by this at first and had to re-read it. Finally pieced together that HE was the third judge and was trying to get with various mothers. One assumes there are at least a few single parents, but it's quite possible they had no actual complaints.
...Ok wait, are these two ponies a particular reference to something, or is it just they both have names of types of leather?
I think this meant eating? I'm not prepared to immediately call it a typo, though, given the style of the rest of this. I may be missing a joke.
Oh there the mares are. Not sure who the stallion's supposed to be.
And there's Fawlty. Not sure why he's called Crease but nice to see him.
Not gonna quote for this next one but I had to look up what a Protocera was.
The view to a kill one feels forced but the others flow surprisingly naturally.
Now for questions I already found answers to in the comments but don't feel like re-writing things above!
10307236
Ah, still need to see that. 5th doctor Davidson was on that I understand, and his stories about it from conventions are amusing.
10306120
"Gamble". I see what you did there.
Anyway, most amusing.
Why is it that whenever I take the time to read one of Estee's stories, Rainbow always seems to be a major character? I mean, I'm certainly not complaining, I just can see the clear pattern here...
But at least they did it very comically.
So...this was, all in all, rather British. I love it.