Around And Around

by TCC56

Chapter 1

Starswirled, Day 1, Take 174.

Sunset groaned at the sound of PostCrush on her phone. She gave in to her frustrations and hurled it across the camper hard enough to replace the alarm with the sound of shattering electronics. On any other day, that would have resulted in a cry of dismay and panic. But after months of the same day, Sunset didn't care. The phone would be back in time to ring that same alarm the next morning.

Without the alarm, things were mostly silent. Outside, there was the distant enthusiasm of Rainbow Dash declaring (for the one hundred and seventy-fourth time) "Starswirled day one, come and get it!"

Pavlovian response kicked in and Sunset rubbed her butt.

Minutes ticked by, and Sunset didn't move. She didn't want to. She didn't care enough to. After all in fourteen hours, twenty-eight minutes it would all reset again. Nothing she did would matter any more than it had the last one hundred and seventy-three times she'd done them. Why even bother getting up?

Reason #1 came through the door carrying a stack of pancakes. "Sunset?" Twilight Sparkle's voice gently pried at Sunset's malaise. "Sunset, are you awake? I'm pancake? I, um, mean I've got pancakes."

Sunset didn't move. She continued to not move even as Twilight came to the bed and loomed over her. "Sunset? Are you okay?"

She wasn't going to go away, Sunset realized. Her very essence grunted with annoyance. "Time loop."

Twilight blinked in confusion. "What?"

"Time loop," Sunset repeated. It was better to get this out of the way now. "I'm caught in a time loop of today and have been for months. Yes, we've talked about this before. You told me to tell you 'Edge Of Tomorrow' to confirm this is real, and then you started ranting about how the novel was better. Yes, it's fascinating and you want to ask me questions to try and figure out how it works because it opens up so many research possibilities. Yes, I've been trying to get out of the loop. And no, not this time."

The egghead froze up, mind attempting to parse it all and overcome Sunset's obviously well-experienced responses. "...Not this time what?," was the best she could come up with on short notice.

"I'm not doing it this time, Twilight. Any of it. I'm done." Sunset grabbed a pillow and smashed it into her face with a quiet whumph. But she knew it wouldn't stop the purple girl. She could feel those eyes boring into her, behind the glasses and behind the pillow. "I've been doing this over and over and-- ARGH!" Sunset hearkened back to her days under Celestia's tutelage and unleashed a flurry of futile kicks in the air as she devolved into a tantrum. "I'm done done done DONE. No more Rainbow Dash hitting me with that stupid paddle! No more waiting in the slowest security line! No more getting covered in paint, no more getting lost in the hedge maze, no more ANYTHING! I can't do it anymore!"

Through the muffled shouting, Twilight simply... stood there after setting the pancakes aside. She let Sunset get it out. She waited. Waited until the time-twisted girl devolved into frustrated sobs. And only then did she set a soft hand on her friend's arm. "It sounds like everything's been pretty hard on you, Sunset. You're right, maybe you should take a little time off. Maybe get some sleep?"

The pillow that had been on Sunset's face was hurled across the room to join her phone. "Sleep won't help, Twilight. I'm not that kind of tired. I just-- I can't do this anymore, alright? The last few loops I've barely done anything. I thought maybe it was because I was out of ideas, but it's not. It's because I'm done." She stared at the ceiling, looking right past Twilight's concerned face. "I'm not sure I even want to get to tomorrow anymore. I mean, honestly! What's even the point? I get to tomorrow and there's just going to be another stupid Equestrian magic crisis that's going to nearly kill all of us."

Twilight gently ran her hand along Sunset's arm. Back and forth. Back and forth. Slowly. Fingertips stroking. Sunset squirmed a little under the almost-tickling touch. "The point is that we've done the right thing, Sunset. We've helped people. You've helped me. Saved me."

"I wouldn't have needed to if I didn't bring magic here in the first place." Sunset glowered ineffectually - then flipped over to bury her face in the mattress.

"I didn't mean Midnight Sparkle." Twilight stopped her stroking, switching up to gently pet Sunset's hair. The Equestrian exile groaned slightly but didn't try to escape further. "I meant from myself. From being alone for my entire life. From having nothing but scientific obsessions, coffee and Spike. Even without the magic, I was on a pretty dark path. You saved me from that."

Sunset's voice was muffled. She should have sat up and confronted Twilight directly. She didn't. She just couldn't muster anything up to try. "You're smart. You would've fixed it eventually. And the girls would've done it without me anyway."

"You don't know that, Sunset."

Finally, she had enough. Sunset rolled off of the mattress and thumped down to the camper's floor. Twilight yelped at the thump, but Sunset was on her feet before Twilight could check on her. And a moment later, she was staring out the window with a horrible mess of bed-head.

"This world would've been better without me, Twilight. And I would've been better without this world. If I hadn't come here, I wouldn't have ruined the girls' lives for three years before they found each other again. Magic wouldn't have nearly destroyed the world several times. I would've eventually made up with Princess Celestia and maybe done something decent with my life." Outside, Fluttershy saw Sunset and waved. Sunset pulled the blinds down on the window. "So I gotta ask myself - was this all worth it? How much I hurt everyone just to make the world worse? And now I've got my punishment, because I'm stuck in this same damn day and it's my whole life in a couple of hours. I fight and I struggle and I sacrifice and nothing changes. I've run myself ragged and I'm no better off than I started and neither is anybody else."

For a good minute, Sunset was pretty sure she'd won. Twilight didn't say anything more. The camper was painfully quiet.

Cloth shifted against cloth when she finally stood up. Sensible boots grazed the thin carpet as she walked across it and picked Sunset's broken phone up. "Was it worth it? That's the wrong question, Sunset. Can you really look at any of us and say it wasn't?" Her hands glowed purple for a few moments, manipulating tiny leads and connections in the phone. While the screen stayed cracked, the phone itself sprang back to life. Perfect.

Twilight grabbed Sunset by the shoulder and spun her around. Before the amber girl could protest, Twilight shoved the cracked phone in her face - one that showed a group photo full of smiles. "Would you tell Fluttershy to her face that she wasn't worth it? Pinkie Pie? Applejack?" With each name, Twilight pushed the phone slightly closer to Sunset. In turn, Sunset leaned further and further back to escape. "How about Wallflower? Was she worth it? Or Juniper?"

The blinds crushed as Sunset flinched away into them.

There was no letting up. "You're obviously comfortable telling me I wasn't worth it, so why not them?" Twilight's face twisted with anger and hurt - and then it was gone. Shoved back down again. "But I know that's not what you mean, Sunset. You're hurting right now, too." She pulled the phone back, turning it so she could look at the screen. "That's why I think you're asking the wrong question. You're asking yourself if this was worth it. You should be asking yourself how you help the next person."

"...The next person?" Sunset mentally clawed at the statement. "Twilight, I'm trapped. I can't get out of today, and I can't help anyone like this!"

"Then you've got your answer," came the gentle reply. "Because as long as you're stuck here, you can't help the next Wallflower or Twilight Sparkle. And..."

Sunset took a deep breath. "And you're right." She closed her eyes tightly.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

In.

Out.

"This loop can't go on forever. Sooner or later I'll get out of it and there will be a tomorrow." Sunset's resolve wavered even as it tried to steady itself. "I could just... let it go. Float with the flow until I'm free."

Two soft hands set onto Sunset's shoulders. "Your body might make it, Sunset, but it wouldn't be you anymore. I want to have my friend tomorrow, not a broken wreck that looks like her." Twilight hesitated again - then the touch became a hug. "Just like my double said once. Sunset Shimmer, we need you."

Eyes opened.

Sunset's arms wrapped around Twilight in return, and she released a shuddering breath that had been held for more than a dozen loops.

Author's Note:

I probably should have just let this story die, but I got halfway through back during the contest and I could never bring myself to throw that work away. I'm honestly not particularly happy with it - it came out as too trite and forced. But it was gonna bother me if I didn't finish it. (Plus some story had to be unlucky #13 and it might as well be one I don't like.)

The story itself is inspired by/tribute to the exchange in Amazing Spider-Man #500 between Spidey and Dr. Strange (which can be found here.)

Comments

[Captain Rackham]

I enjoyed it, rather weird but fun
Thank you

[Neece]

I hope she get's fine in the end

[Proper Prose]

Sometimes we just need to breakdown. Sunset is fortunate she has someone there willing to help pick up the pieces.

[Ninjadeadbeard]

That was a very nice story. Sorry it never made it to the competition, but I think it would have done marvelously!

While the screen stayed cracked, the phone itself sprang back to life. Perfect.

Also, I don't know why, but this feels like the best metaphor for Sunset's life as I can imagine.

[redandready45]

Man, this was really, really good. This is something that could've been in the movie. More people ought to read this.

[ScisetShimmerEvan]

This sure was great nad I'm glad twilight made sunset feel happy that all she's done wasn't just on purpose but to happen and I really like the ending since I just love sciset moments epically fan made ones

[FanOfMostEverything]

You told me to tell you 'Edge Of Tomorrow' to confirm this is real, and then you started ranting about how the novel was better.

Well, yes, Twilight really sees herself in the protagonist. Especially when she starts cracking alien skulls with a baseball bat.

Thank you for seeing this through. I admit, I find it hard to take off the shipping goggles with these two, but even from a Platonic perspective, this was some fantastic friendshipping.

[Vaguely Demented]

Impressed she managed 174 times before an existential crisis.

[The Red Parade]

Hey there. This was reviewed here. Thanks for submitting! Deuces!

[hawthornbunny]

A great little read and another one for the group. It's a shame more people haven't explored this part of the canon.

[Theresa]

After living part of a year in a loop I would go a little nuts too. And this doesn't really sound like they really tried to help. Truthfully I can't remember them even trying to find what causing the problem. They know that sunset is the only one to remember that time is on a loop but instead of stopping this so that they can actually grow up and get adult jobs sunset had to do it all.