• Member Since 14th May, 2013
  • offline last seen September 1st

Lightstruck


Name's Lightstruck. I write when I can but have focus issues. I do edits for those that that meet requirements. LOL

T

Willow and Shield led a rather normal life, nothing out of the ordinary. Until one night, strange sounds wake them out of their slumber. What are they to do with the young foal they have found?

Featured July 2019! (Found out recently)

Art by -
Ambris Art (Cover)
Pridark (Grieving Together)

Please forgive my inconsistency with the childrens vernacular. I feed on feedback so please leave comments, good or bad.

Violence and death tags are there to warn but violence does not play a major role in story nor do they have anything to do with one another. :fluttershysad:

Chapters (20)
Comments ( 262 )

I'll be keeping my eye on this

Pet the adorable little love bug. Pet it, hug it....

9702594
Let him, hug him, love him... How do we fed... Oh yea love him!

9703003
9703542
Oh don't worry I've got a few chapters stocked up that are going through editing and finalization. :pinkiehappy:

U know a story good is here when u want more:trollestia:

This reminds me of Napa on the Bug Planet for some reason.

I look forward to reading more of this! Please continue...

So cute.......

I once had a random stray kitten show up on my doorstep but I had no idea how to deal with cats. I gave it a plate of (cow) milk but it ignored the milk and kept meowing at me. A couple minutes later it walked off and I never saw it again.

9705047
Well that was not something I wanted to start my morning with. :pinkiesad2:

Achu, the little bug pony sneezed. Its eyelids starting to droop, their resistance to moving growing weaker, and a big yawn followed. The two little white nubs of fangs barely showing as the thin tongue stretched itself before quickly retreating. It was adorable to even the hardened ex-royal guard.

Adorable cuteness might be the natural defense weapon of young changelings.
Because ponies can never hurt something as cute as this, can they?

“I know, its not your fault. Just as a spider eats bugs.” She stiffens at that, “Maybe that’s not the greatest analogy I could have used, considering.”

Yeah, probably.


Good prologue!
I enjoyed reading it and look forwards to see where it goes.

But it needs more cute bug noises.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2016/8/23/1232156.gif
Source.

Humm wonder if Chitter after spending enough time with Willow and Shield will become a "reformed" changeling? If he does he better hope he becomes the type with "chest jewels" so his diamond implant will blend into his default form.

*reads AN and shrugs* Fine by me.

I'm willing to bet that the next chapter is when the adoption is official.

Well THIS was a hectic chapter.

For shame, Sun Butt! You should know by now that Trollestia must always be on a leash when on walkies!

9731367
In a good way... or does... does it need to be fixed?!

9731429
What was going on was what caused it to be hectic.

Dude, for a first story this is surprisingly thought out. Great work!

9742690
Here's the thing... my first story here bombed! I took it down because it didnt do so well and I had no direction.
This is my second story.

Question-What time in the series does this story take place?
Like relative to the show. Is it after the Canterlot invasion, , but before the changelings reformed?

9743352
:derpyderp1: = me

... *shrugs*
I'd have to say after reform. That's all I can say.

“Whatzit?” The pegasus muttered, mentally collecting all the gears she would need today.
A chirp entered her ears and the machine was built from the ground up in seconds; a new all time record! “Oh, hello!” [...]
Her freshly assembled machine produced a question.

Great Idea! That's an analogy I should remember.

“Hey Mr. Cake? Has Pinkie used the mirror pool again?”
“Shield, she had coffee this morning.”
“It was only four cups!” Pinkie protested.
“That'd do it.” Shield mumbled.

Imagine what would happen if Discord would replace the water of the mirror pool with coffee...
On second thought, better not.


I kinda aggree with Willow. Celestia makes very harsch conditions on an young, helpless colt.
Once Chitter grows old enough to understand everything he might get angry about that.

This gem is very, very special. It will passively gather positive emotion and store them.” Twilight sat down, lifted the gem, and gestured at it. “As you can see right now it's dull like something took some of its color. As it fills with energy it will steadily grow brighter. When full it'll be approximately the same brightness as a glowstick.”

Those gems could probably solve the feeding problems for all changelings, if implemented correctly.

He was trying to mimic Shield by babbling nonsense (not even in equish) and sitting as the older stallion was.

Babbling nonsense is the most reliable way to imitate stallions. An important lesson for every changeling.

“Willow, what are you talking about? Who in their right mind scrubs the ceiling?”

Someone who wants to adopt an child who is able to walk on the ceiling? Like a changeling?

“For my actions I will personally pay the medical cost for the gem implants. Consider it an apology and congratulatory gift.”

Wouldn't she have to pay them anyway since she is the one who requestet the implants in the first place?


9731379
:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

9742856
Well, this one is certainly good!
I enjoyed reading it so far and look forwards for the next part.

9749416

Wouldn't she have to pay them anyway since she is the one who requestet the implants in the first place?

I looked at it like adoption, in regards to you have to take care of medical.

Those gems could probably solve the feeding problems for all changelings, if implemented correctly.

I also never thought of that tbh...

I don't think you went too far I also don't think this warrants a raised rating, though I DO want a rather SEVERE punishment for the perpetrators.

Kidnapped, blinded with a indent in his face and a burn down home. Yes very much too far dude very much to fucking far

This is still within the T-rating. Now, if the violence was more detailed, then that would fall under Gore. Still want punishment for the sick bastard who would hit a hatchling.

9755490 Oh. In that case, bump it up to a T with a Violence tag.

Where is Thorax during all this? As king he should be helping the little guy.

9755659
Gonna be honest... I dont really have a place to put him with what I constructed. I didn't really think of him (not sure why) while writing this.
I'm sorry everyone!

9755332
No indent, just cracked chitin/carapace.

I'll let the crowd decide, should I raise the rating? Did I go too far?

I think the current rating is okay.
Maybe consider making a note that "Death" is no integral part of the story. Otherways some readers my be scared away.
The same can be done with "Violence". At least for now, since don't know what might happen in the future.

9755663
Don't think too much about this.
No one can possibly consider all things in an universe as big as MLP.

9756118
I cant explain why it's there. I can but cant...

There better?

9756329
Better. This prevent others to assume the tags may apply for the whole story.

Suggestion for an improvement:
Violence and death tags are set to warn for a few minor scenes, but don't apply to most of the story.

for a first story i am vary surprised and pleased, this is a vary good story.

i see no need to change your ratings.

For some reason I'm suddenly reminded of all the EP stories when I think of that vendor who the guard would probably arrest anyways.

a good chapter and i see a set up for a good story ark at some point.

9771054
I got the other half of ch going thru edit
9772360
Moar.

She lit her horn in fire (in reality was simply orange colored magic) summoning a weird curved "T" shaped tool and the mother grabbed her filly.

Is that an hammer? Or what is that "tool"?


Good chapter!
I enjoyed reading it.

Cuteness: minimal
Excitement: nonexistent
Amusement: nonexistent

9777144
Not every single chapter can be a rip roaring good time. It's a slice of life not action. But I will consider it in future chapters.

9777157
I know I just felt like doing that, up to you not me.

Login or register to comment