- Member Since 8th Aug, 2018
- offline last seen April 22nd
Barley Citrus
I write about the countless coital encounters between humanoid horsies, anthropomorphous equines and at least passably bipedal pony people... Also, I really fuckin like Equestria Girls my dudes.
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While a little lacking a few times, I have to admit that I really liked this one. I can't stand futa-on-male, so reading a story where what little plot there is avoids it is a bonus for me.
9140950
I'm glad you enjoyed it
what kind of things did you find lacking?
future chapters are coming so I'd love to hear some feedback
Pretty nice, would love to see more. Twiriosa is way better than Twimber anyway
9141579
thanks
I have a few more chapters planned.
9140960
I'm not entirely sure. I mean, it's all there I suppose. It feels like it's the "show, not tell" issue, maybe. I haven't studied literature in any way other than what little was taught in primary school, so I can only say that I feel like it was a little lacking a few times.
I have read like, a lot of fan-fiction, and some books, and I used to write stories myself once upon a time, so really, I mostly have what experience has taught me.
9142813
ok, I feel you I'm about the same
and started writing these to experiment with different writing styles
so i'll try to continue changing the way I do things until something sticks
thanks for the feedback brother
Twilight's going to tease her until she caves into no-turning-back pleasure.
It would seem, she has starting to falling.
Pretty soon, she be begging.
media1.tenor.com/images/77028f69d32d69029eb6bb874aa9e39d/tenor.gif?itemid=10486354
It Got Posted On A Tuesday!
9221453
Yea, I just had more time to work on it than I projected
So I finished it early
Since the break up, Gloriosa doesn't have to hold anything back.
How about a bonus?
9265547
unlikely
but what'd you have in mind?
9265585
While Twilight's parents are away for a month, and Timber Spruce got secretly seduced by the Dazzlings, Twilight and Gloriosa will finally go all out non-stop.
9266392
Or I could just make that dazzlings x timber idea...
Nice. Normally I’m not into futa stories, but I gave this a chance since it features Gloriosa; very few eroticas featuring her, all of them lackluster.
This exceeded my expectations. Great job!
9276174
Thank you
Really appreciate it
If you enjoyed my writing I hope you stick around
I do occasionally write non futa stories too
This sounds like it could be a nice story, but.
Your dialogue is, like, super-annoying to read because of stuff like that part I underlined--if you have Gloriosa do a thing right after dialogue, my assumption is that she's the one who's speaking, which I don't think was the case here, and the context makes that kinda clear, but it's just so much more confusing than it needs to be. Dialogue tags are your very best friend/cuddlebuddy when you wanna do stuff like that.
9294813
shit, thanks for pointing that out, I'll go fix it.
I was still experimenting with how to block text when I wrote this chapter
9276199 How about a epilogue where Gloirosa discovers that she's pregnant?
9655941
I appreciate the interest
But canonically, Twilight is infertile
so that would just raise the question, who else is Glori fucking?
9655950 Her brother? I kid, I kid.
9655964
Oh shit
The entire time Twi was cheating on Timber with Glori
Timber was also secretly cheating on Twi with Glori
The plot thickens...