Granny Smith was a God Damn Sexual Tyrannosaurus in her day
If anyone bothered to ask, Adagio wouldn’t hesitate: yes, she vastly preferred time at her girlfriend’s house to her own and seized any excuse to head over. It had reached the point where none of the Apples thought much about her presence, even when Applejack herself was busy with the farm. Applebloom had made odd comments about Adagio helping out for her keep (namely, with Applebloom’s chores), but neither Mac nor Granny paid her any mind. No comment had even been raised on her habit of spending the night with Applejack.
Until today. What should have been a pleasant exchange over evening brandy (The Apples had loose alcohol rules) took on a new and unexpected life with a single revelation.
“Y’all haven’t snogged yet?” Granny looked up sharply from her glass, fixing the pair with a surprised look.
“Course not, Granny.” Applejack placated her with a gentle smile. “We’re saving til marriage.”
“Marriage, schmarriage,” Granny said, drawing a chuckle from the orange-haired traitor next to Applejack. “Y’all ain’t gonna be young forever, so get cracking!”
Applejack gazed wide-eyed at her grandmother, ignoring the laughter from their third. A sip of the bourbon at least gave her something to do while processing this new information.
“I thought...” she began slowly, and finished like a child. “I thought waiting was what we did?”
“Who’s we?” Granny asked.
“Us!” Another sip to steady herself, though Applejack knew bourbon didn’t really work like that. “Decent folk. Mom and dad, you and grandpa, Mac and Sugar Belle...”
“Mac and Sugar Belle?” Granny Smith arched an eyebrow. “Y’all know she spends nights here, right?”
Applejack pointed a thumb to the window. “Sure I do. And whenever that happens, they spend the night in the orchard stargazing.”
“Stargazing,” Adagio and Granny repeated together.
Applejack nodded. “Yeah. Mac told me when I asked him about it.”
Adagio gave a groaning, happy sigh. “You’re adorable.”
“Hoo-lordy, girl.” Granny cast her eyes to the ceiling. “We missed something with your education along the way.”
“Time for remedial lessons,” Adagio said, turning her voice to its phone-sex maximum. Applejack yipped as two manicured fingers pinched her on the side. “No worries, Miss Smith, your daughter is in good hands.”
She breathed and stretched the last word, drawing a wincing glare out of Applejack. That was one of her rules – no touchy-feely or innuendo in front of the family. In hindsight they wouldn’t have cared, but Granny gave immediate cause for regret.
“No thanks Dazzle, we gotta talk sex woman to woman! So get your patooty out of here unless you want to stick around and hear it.”
“I’ll stay,” Adagio said. Applejack looked to her with such shock and dawning horror she could not resist an evil sneer.
Granny shrugged, and turned to her apple-red granddaughter. “Fine. Now listen here, O Fruit of Mine. Yer a horny teenager and y’all got needs. At church and TV and whatnot they taught you sex was for married people, so you got to thinking it was shameful to have needs like you do. So you treated it as a big secret, like with that magazine under your bed.”
“Magazine?” Adagio’s sultry pout was the last thing Applejack saw before reaching up to pull her hat down. Realizing her head was bare, she made do with covering her eyes as Adagio finished. “Am I not enough for you, Sweetness?”
Granny – as she often did – answered for Applejack. “Of course you are, she just needs to ask. So AJ, don’t you be shy for our sake, and don’t you dare be shy for the sake of some priest or politician. If you got an itch you want scratched and she wants to scratch it, you let her scratch it all night long. Don’t have to worry about condoms or nothing with a lady, just check for warts first.”
Applejack’s voice rolled from around her hands, dribbling painfully to the air. “It’s a creaky old house, Granny. What if y’all hear?”
“Girl, this place was creaky when I was young,” Granny said. “I guarantee we’ll all hear. And we won’t say a word, and the next day we won’t do nothing except pour extra coffee and ask how your night was.”
“Joy,” Applejack croaked.
“Now, about fetishes...”
Applejack cut in sharply. “I don’t need to learn about that.”
The bonfire roared behind her face as Adagio’s voice took a halting, innocent tone. “But Miss Smith, I don’t know anything about fetishes. Won’t you please explain, in great detail?”
“You’re going to hell,” Applejack muttered.
Granny Smith’s eyes narrowed at Adagio. “You just want to embarrass my granddaughter.”
Applejack peeked over her hands to see the siren grin, unrepentant.
A second passed, and the bonfire exploded as Granny gave a grin to match. “Woman after my own heart. Let me tell you, when I was Applejack’s age they called me Whipsmack Apple. Took a while for me to meet a man who could keep up, but when we did, hoo boy. I don’t mind saying Bright Mac popped out seven months after the wedding, and I got no regrets.”
“I’m done!” Applejack shouted. She rocketed from her chair fast enough to send it flying backwards. Flame-red fingers seized her drink and she downed it in one gulp. “I’m going to milk the cows. Y’all don’t need me for this.”
“Think of me while you milk them,” Adagio teased.
“Don’t mind her, Dazzle,” Granny said. “I got photographs from my Whipsmack days if you want to see. Somewhere up with her grandpa’s old things, heh-heh.”
“Fine, fine, have fun with that!” Applejack waved, already halfway out the door.
“Appleseed, wait.”
The childhood nickname caught Applejack just before she left the room. She turned her head back to the table, not quite trusting the pair enough to fully rejoin.
Granny went on with a serious tone. “The crux of this is that you gotta do what’s right for you. If you ain’t comfortable with porking this fine heifer yet...”
At which Adagio growled “Hey,” though Granny Smith went on. “...Then you leave it be. Don’t let her cajole or guilt you into doing it. But don’t let any high and mighty types guilt you into not doing it. You make your own choices, girl.”
Applejack was still too flustered for rational response, but she did manage a nod. Her place resumed at a walk, which transformed to a sprint as Adagio’s response followed her through the door.
“Alright, Miss Smith, now let me tell you some of my stories. It was the Civil War, see? We were in a stable with all these bits and bridles and...”
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Rune Soldier Dan · 12k words · 141 4 · 2.3k views
- Kinni · 11k words · 60 13 · 3k views
- Fuzzyfurvert · 4.2k words · 51 2 · 1.6k views
- King_Again · 20k words · 150 8 · 4.1k views
- Hopeful_Ink_Hoof · 3.5k words · 55 3 · 1.3k views
- Cadiefly · 19k words · 41 3 · 1.7k views
- NaiadSagaIotaOar · 12k words · 111 9 · 3.8k views
- Webdog177 · 6k words · 151 9 · 3.7k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.117 seconds
Total duration
1,047 users online
1,455,420 hits today, 1,960,719 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
oh god it's up
help
This chapter title is very indicative of the content. I never pegged Granny Smith for being as, if not more, sexually blunt as Adagio.
Now that is a title I can get behind, and I can even hear it in Jesse Ventura’s voice.
I love this.
Grandma was a freak in her day, but I bet Adagio was freaker!
So what you're telling me is that Adagio rode the actual General Lee.
It's her whole bit.
I went to click next chapter but i was disappointed that their was no next chapter
Um...doesn't 'snog' mean kiss? I thought 'shag' meant sex. Also, both words are a bit too British for an American southern family if you ask me. But, hey, what do I know?
Anyway, love Granny in this chapter, she ain't pulling any punches when it comes to 'the talk'.
9007240
Snog is often misused as a slang for sex, so eh, why not.
I never realized how much I wanted these two to compare notes until now.
So, as to those latest chapters:
Pets and Reconciliation: Ok, so… Makoto reminds me so much of my own cat, I love this on principle. XD
Not really much to say about this one, though, other than that it’s nice to see Adagio trying to make amends with Applejack’s friends and, in her own way, be a better person. The overall chapter was pretty fun, and as a cat-lover myself, I love that these two got a cat for their own, shared pet. X3
Now…
Granny Smith was a God Damn Sexual Tyrannosaurus in her day: Man, that’s a long title…
This chapter kinda threw me off a loop for a moment and made wonder: Is this a sequel to Appledagio, or are you trying to keep it ambiguous irrelevant as much as possible? ‘cause unless Applejack was lying here about never having done it with Adagio, then there’s… kind of a plot-hole/inconsistence. Granted, this does seem like the type of thing a teen would lie to her grandparents about (and Applejack may be bad at lying but that doesn’t mean she can’t do it, especially around relatives), I’d just like a confirmation so I can quit scratching my head about it. ^^U
That aside, though, this was a downright hilarious chapter, and I loved the dynamic between Adagio and Granny. XD
I also loved that, humor aside, Granny told her granddaughter something of really good value that I can definitely agree with, so good on that, and overall, a really good chapter. ^^
Can’t wait for more. :D
9033747
To answer both sorta-questions, yes I'm feeling it's the same continuity as Appledagio, but the marked difference in tone and structure makes me want to minimize the former as "not necessary to enjoy this one." Near the end of Appledagio they made out (with a little boobie kissing), but stopped short of actual consummation. Hence, Granny's annoyance in this one and Adagio's pleasure as the old woman takes her side.
Thanks for the good vibes.
9035653
Uhm, I know what happened at the end of the fic, but I'm pretty sure it's made clear far more than that happened the night they shared together, considering Applejack addressed it as "her first time" the morning after. ^^UUUU
9036336
First time spending the night and making out with a girl. Still mind-blowing for dear AJ.
9036518
Huh, sure felt like it was more that, but alright.
Now I wonder if their first, first time will feature in a chapter... 👀
As silly as this, I think Granny is awesome for telling someone that sex and attraction, as long there is consent, is nothing to be ashamed off.
Ah, this is charming~
That moment when your smoking hot girlfriend can swap epoch stories with your grandmother
Oh boy those two taking kinks is sure to be a hoot. Thankfully granny is not one for prudishness, AJ is in good hands
Can we expect more of this any time soon or is it one of those "when it comes it comes" kind of stories?
9880419
Probably a better way of putting it is "when it came, it came," past tense. After writing the first Momlestia/Buffy Sunset story I made several half-starts with EQG slice-of-life projects, which either didn't get published or are what you see on my page, before I finally capitulated to my own desires and wrote the dang sequel.
If you enjoy this ship, I would point you to Appledagio for my most earnest crack at it.
If I still have the EQG bee in my burr after a few weeks, I'll probably do an episodic, suggestion-driven story in the undead-verse and let people ship to their heart's content.
9881224
Awesome
I'm on the field that would love more undead verse, so I'm all for it
I don't quite remember though, did Sunset, Adagio & AJ become a pseudo-herd or was it only extreme teasing on Adagio's part at the end?
9881662
It was extreme teasing. "Adagio being Adagio," as it were, though where it goes from there is left vague.