• Published 25th Nov 2017
  • 2,073 Views, 37 Comments

How to Ponynap Bookhorse - SC_Orion



It's a warm, sunny summer day. Everything is perfect. No distractions, no major world-ending threats, just a lazy summer day to relax. Starlight, Trixie, and Pinkie feel like ponynapping Twilight.

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Ponynapping Alicorns is Easy

"I'm so bored..." Starlight groaned, pressing her head against the table. "It's a nice day, so I thought going outside would be more enjoyable than staying inside and relaxing... I guess it is, but... ugh, there's nothing to do..." she sighed.


Trixie rubbed Starlight's withers with her hoof in an attempt to cheer her up. "The grrrreat and powerful Trixie! thinks you need to relax. Maybe let loose and have some fun. Trixie knows she would if she were in your place," she replied.


Starlight nodded and took a deep breath, then lifted her head back up. "But... I don't know what to do! I guess... being Twilight's student isn't always as fun as it sounds."


"Well, we could always do something like a prank," Trixie suggested.


Starlight stared at the blue unicorn blankly.


Trixie blinked. "What? You look like Trixie is incapable of doing pranks! I thought you should know by now that I love a good prank!" she said in a cheerful tone. "So long as Trixie is not the recipient of one," she said matter-of-factly.


Starlight snorted and cracked a smile. "Yeah, I guess you have a point there..." she trailed off and looked over the table, then back up at Trixie. "What kind of a prank did you have in mind?"


Trixie shrugged. "You act like Trixie knows what to do, when in fact, Trixie has no idea."


Starlight squinted at Trixie and tilted her head to the side. "But you're the one who suggested a prank..." she said at length.


Trixie looked at Starlight flatly. "That doesn't mean Trixie has any ideas," she said quickly.


"Hi Starlight, hi Trixie!"


"Gah!" Trixie shot up out of her chair, and her hair stood up on end like a cat, with her back arching up slightly. A second later, she landed on all fours and glared at Pinkie Pie.


Pinkie Pie giggled from beside Trixie. "Trixie, I didn't know being a cat was a part of your act!"


"It isn't!" Trixie retorted.


Pinkie stopped giggling and stared at Trixie blankly, then she tilted her head to the side. "Then why were you acting like a cat?"


"I was not acting like a cat!" Trixie stated defensively. She let her glare go and closed her eyes, raising her hoof and waving it dismissively, "Besides, that would be foalish, and Trixie is no foal."


"Okay," Pinkie replied cheerfully. She started bouncing in place happily, making a 'boinging' sound. "So what are you two doing?"


Starlight looked at Trixie. "Well... I guess we're trying to decide on a prank?" she asked.


Pinkie squeed and her eyes lit up with joy. "Oh oh-oh! Pranks! I love pranks! Can I help? I have a great idea for a prank that I've wanted to try out for ev-er!"


Starlight shifted her weight uncomfortably and looked at Trixie, who looked back at her warily in return. After a few seconds, Starlight reluctantly nodded her head. "Sure, Pinkie... what was your idea?"


"Yay!" Pinkie exclaimed, jumping up in the air to a height that a pegasus would fly. She landed gracefully and smiled giddily as she ran in place from excitement. "Oh, it's just amazing! We had a shipment of goods arrive at the bakery a while ago, but we ordered them from a new place unlike normal, cause it was supposed to be cheaper, which meant we could sell our yummy-ummy-ummy goods even cheaper! But then the shipment arrived on time, which well, we thought it was good at first, but then we realized that the shipment was chloroform instead of vanilla like we ordered, so now we just have a bunch of chloroform lying around in the bakery that we have no idea to do with, so I was thinking, 'wouldn't it be great to prank somepony with it?'" Pinkie smiled wildly at Starlight after she finished, never once taking a breath and not the slightest bit winded.


"You have chloroform lying around in the bakery," Trixie said in an even voice, her expression unreadable.


After a few seconds, Starlight blinked a few times. "Uh... chloroform..?" she asked. "Isn't that something that can knock ponies unconscious?"


"Yep!" Pinkie said, jumping with excitement.


"How exactly did this order get mixed up?" Trixie asked, glancing back and forth at Starlight and Pinkie.


"What exactly are we supposed to do with the chloroform..?" Starlight asked, slowly tilting her head to the left towards Trixie and away from Pinkie.


Pinkie closed her eyes and giggled, snorting once. "Isn't it obvious, silly? We use it to knock out Twilight and then we ponynap her!"


"Ponynapping Twilight..?" Trixie asked, a smug smile slowly growing on her lips. "Well, I think that could be fun." The smile faded. "Except for the fact that she's an alicorn princess," she stated evenly.


"Oh, I can disable her magic so she couldn't fight back," Starlight commented casually. "I have one of those magic inhibitor rings. It's high quality, too. It was a gift from Sunburst." She tilted her head to the side and looked at the sky in thought. "I'm not really sure why he gave it to me though." She blinked then shook her head.


"Okay... so let me get this straight," Trixie started flatly. "The baker just happens to have chloroform lying around from a mixed up order, and you have a magic inhibitor ring which could disable Twilight's magic?"


"Yep!" Pinkie replied.


"Yes," Starlight answered. "And I remember I put it on my dresser, so I should be able to find it easily."


Trixie sighed. "Great," she said dryly. "We have chloroform and a magic inhibitor ring. What's next?"


Starlight hopped out of her chair. "Hey, Trixie? Don't you have some rope and a muzzle?"


Trixie stared blankly at Starlight. "Trixie has a rope and a muzzle for her acts."


"Oooh! We could tie up Twilight and muzzle her!" Pinkie exclaimed, giggling with joy. "Just imagine how she'll react when she wakes up! It'll be great! Oh! Oh! What if we blindfold her too? That way she won't know who we are when she wakes up!"


"This idea keeps getting worse and worse," Trixie deadpanned.


"Don't you have a blindfold?" Starlight asked.


"I have a mask I wear over my eyes when sleeping," Trixie answered. "Trixie does not like the morning sunlight hurting her eyes and forcing her to wake up so early."


"Alright, so we're going to use chloroform to ponynap Twilight, then we're going to disable her magic, tie her up and blindfold her. What should we do after that? Where should we take her?" Starlight asked idly.


Pinkie sat down on her haunches and looked aside in thought. "Maybe the ruins of the castle of the two sisters?" she suggested. She looked back at Starlight, then her expression exploded with happiness. "Oooh! Idea! We could take her there and it would be perfect for making her think we were trying to get revenge on her for something!"


"I thought we didn't want her to know it was us until we finished?" Starlight asked.


"Oh, right," Pinkie replied calmly. "Hmmm.... what if we acted like we were some baddy bad guy or a supervillain or something? And we wanted her out of the way?"


"That could work," Starlight commented. "And since she's dealt with so many of them before, maybe she'll enjoy the prank too."


"There is no possible way this can go wrong," Trixie sighed.


Starlight looked over at Trixie. "Wasn't pranking Twilight your idea?"


"Trixie suggested pranking, not ponynapping," Trixie replied evenly.


Starlight watched Trixie's dull, dry expression for several seconds. "...You'll be able to say that you managed to ponynap Twilight."


"Count Trixie in," Trixie answered.


Starlight smiled. "Now, I think I know how to play the role of the villain..." she said lightly. "Who's going to knock her out?" For several seconds, there was silence. Starlight looked back and forth at Trixie and Pinkie. "Rock paper scissors?"


"Rock paper scissors doesn't work with three. I've tried before," Pinkie replied casually.


"Oh, right," Starlight winced.


"Trixie votes Pinkie do it. She seems like the best candidate to succeed at this. If she acts strange, Twilight will just think it's Pinkie being Pinkie," Trixie stated.


"I'm good at being me!" Pinkie giggled.


"Okay, I'm good with that," Starlight said. "So... we'll do this tonight? Around... eight? That way it'll be dark?" she asked. Trixie and Pinkie nodded. "Okay... I... guess we should go get ready then?"


"Yepperoni!" Pinkie replied.


"Trixie will get the rope, muzzle, and blindfold," Trixie acknowledged. "Do you need anything else? Trixie thinks she still has a gag if you need one," she said sarcastically.


"I don't think we'll need a gag," Pinkie replied.


"I'll head back and get the inhibitor ring..." Starlight said. "Although I don't know what to do until tonight."


"Maybe you could set up the castle for tonight?" Pinkie asked. "Since you can teleport, you can get there and back super duper fast, just like Twilight. Although she still walks there, and I'm not really sure why she does that..."


"Right," Starlight answered. "I guess I'll go do some renovations..." she mused. She tilted her head to the side and watched a cloud float by. "I wonder if I can still decorate as well as I could when I ruled that town..."


"You mean the town where the only decorations were equal signs?" Pinkie asked curiously.


Starlight nodded. "Yes. I'm not much of an interior designer, but I like to think I can do some decoration," she affirmed.


"I thought it was great!" Pinkie exclaimed.


Starlight smiled at Pinkie. "Thanks, it wasn't easy deciding which style to use for the equal signs." She took a deep breath, then glanced at Trixie. "Well. I'll see you guys tonight!" She lit her horn, then teleported away.


Twilight hummed to herself as she idly walked through her castle. In her magic just ahead of her, she carried a large, thick book, filled with hundreds of pages of information on magic theory. It was all theoretical and had no practical application whatsoever, and she read it ravenously, taking it in like a newborn foal hungry for milk.


While she read, she still managed to stay aware of her surroundings and avoided running into the walls of her castle. The sounds of hooves clopping on the cold crystal floor, the sound of her magic, and the sound of pages turning were her only companions as she strode through the hallways.


A faint knocking sound gave her pause. She blinked, lowered her book, and looked up. Her ears swiveled around in search of the source of the sound, attempting to locate it. After a few seconds, the sound repeated. She squinted and hummed, then teleported herself and her literary companion to the lobby. As she arrived, a sharp crack of magic broke the stillness of the air, followed immediately by more knocking, coming from the main door to her castle. She smiled and happily trotted over to the door. 'Ponies don't normally visit this late, I wonder who it is...' she thought.


After a couple of seconds, she crossed the distance to the door, then pulled it open with her magic. Pinkie popped up right in front of the doorway. "Oh! Hello, Pinkie! What brings you by this late?"


"Hi, Twilight!" Pinkie greeted cheerfully. She stood up on her hind legs, then reached into her mane with a forehoof and pulled out a white handkerchief, then thrust it against Twilight's nose and held it there. "Does this smell like chloroform to you?"


Twilight frowned and inhaled deeply, sniffing the handkerchief. "Yes, Pinkie, tha-" her eyes went wide and her legs gave out from under her. In less than a second, she fell limply to the floor, with her legs splaying out beneath her.


Pinkie giggled at the unconscious alicorn and shoved the handkerchief back into her mane. "Twilight's out!" she called.


After a few seconds, Starlight and Trixie walked in. Trixie stared blankly at the unconscious alicorn splayed out on the floor. "I cannot believe that worked," she stated flatly.


Starlight slowly looked at Trixie and shrugged. "It's Twilight..?" she offered.


"Come on, guys! Help me get her ready!" Pinkie said.


Trixie and Starlight walked over to Twilight. Starlight levitated the magic inhibitor ring out from her saddlebag and slid it onto Twilight's horn. The ring fit perfectly, despite Twilight's abnormal alicorn horn. Trixie stood there, watching Twilight. She lifted a forehoof up and touched Twilight's body, then shook her once. Twilight's body limply rocked with the shake. Trixie smirked and shook her again. "Trixie has finally bested you, Twilight!"


"Hurry up and tie her up, Trixie," Starlight replied.


Trixie gave an indignant "Humpf," and tilted her head away from Starlight. "Let Trixie enjoy the moment."


"Okay," Starlight replied. She waited a moment before speaking, "The moment's over. Now can you please tie her up?"


Trixie relented and levitated a rope, a loose strap muzzle, and blindfold out of her saddlebags. She secured the blindfold over Twilight's eyes, then put the muzzle around Twilight's muzzle and secured it in the back around her head. "Trixie never thought she would end up ponynapping and tying up a princess," she commented casually. She used her magic to hold Twilight's forelegs to her body and then she tied the rope around Twilight's wings and legs to secure them to her body, preventing her from flying away or moving.


"Okay, I think we're ready to go," Starlight said. "Are we forgetting anything?"


Pinkie bounced over to the door, then closed it, and grabbed Twilight's book. "Don't forget about the book and the door! If you just left them, ponies would figure out she got ponynapped because she would never leave a book just lying around, or by the door which was left open."


"Oh, right. Good idea," Starlight commented. She used her magic and teleported the book to Twilight's room, then looked around, making sure nothing else looked out of place.


"Trixie believes we are ready to go and see your work, Starlight," Trixie stated. "You can teleport all of us there, right?"


Starlight smiled and nodded. "Of course. I am Twilight's student, after all. And I didn't just enslave a whole town through words," she said with a chuckle. She ended the chuckle with a lengthy inhale. "That took magic."


"And don't forget about that one time when you brainwashed all of us!" Pinkie interjected.


Trixie raised an eyebrow.


Starlight ignored them and teleported all four of them to the Castle of the Two Sisters. No sooner than they arrived than was there a crack of lightning from overhead, serving as a foreboding, ominous warning to all of those who sought to challenge and or inhabit the Everfree forest at night.


Trixie groaned and shook her head, reeling from the spell, while Pinkie just giggled playfully. "Again! Again!" she cheered.


Starlight picked Twilight up with her magic and walked towards one of the nearby doors. The one in particular that she headed to, unlike most of the other doors, was in good condition- it was a sturdy, solid oak door, reinforced with metal bands holding it together. She casually opened the door and ducked into the cold, dark, stone hallways of the castle. As soon as she stepped into the hallway, torches exploded to life, casting an eerie orange glow throughout the length of the hallway.


"Ooooh, fancy!" Pinkie giggled. "You did a good job with renovations, Starlight!" she complimented, giggling happily as she bounced on in passed Starlight and headed down the hallway.


Starlight smiled. "Well, I was bored, so I thought I might as well put in the extra effort to make everything look like an evil villain's lair."


"Trixie does not know whether to be impressed or concerned," Trixie acknowledged casually, trotting on in after them.


"Oh relax, it's all for fun," Starlight said dismissively, smirking back at Trixie. "Besides, it's been a while since I've gotten to enjoy this sort of thing. I've kind of missed it," she admitted, bobbing her head to the left. After a moment, she blinked and stopped. "Not that I want to do this sort of thing all the time. Enslaving a village was hard work."


"Oh, please," Trixie said in a high-voice, casually sauntering passed Starlight. She dragged her tail across Starlight's body, neck, and muzzle. "The Great and Powerful Trixie enslaved Ponyville a hundred times better than you enslaved your town!"


Starlight snorted. "Yeah, sure," she said playfully. "But you were using a magic amulet to help you. I was only using my own magic and my charisma." She shook her head and resumed walking, carrying the limp alicorn in her magic beside her.


"Trixie is charismatic too!" Trixie retorted. She huffed indignantly and increased her stride towards the door at the end of the hallway. "Where are we going, anyway? Dungeons?"


"Yes," Starlight answered. "I refurbished them. They should work out quite nicely for what we're doing."


The conscious trio continued along the long hallway until they reached the door. Pinkie threw the door open and ducked her head inside, then looked down and up. "Oooh, a spiral staircase! I have one of these in the bakery!"


"Spiral staircases are space efficient," Starlight commented, taking the lead and going down. "Especially in castles. There's a tower above this, too. It's still in pretty good shape, but I didn't work on it. Just the dungeons."


The trio continued down and down, walking around in circles, gradually making their way down to the dungeon. "Trixie does not like spiral staircases."


"Is it because it's like a wheel since it's circular..?" Pinkie asked curiously.


Trixie blinked and stared at Pinkie. A few more seconds passed in silence. "Trixie does not want to talk about it."


Eventually, they arrived at the bottom of the staircase. The dungeon was cold, poorly lit, and recently refurbished. There was new carpet on the floor going down the central hallway, and there were a few chairs and tables with vases decorating the hall. A few of the walls had kites decorating them. The metal bars making the side of each cell facing the hallway had been recently cleaned of rust. Despite the cleaning, the dungeon smelled damp and mildewy, although the air had the added scent of cleaning supplies and an artificial pine scent. "Brr! It's kind of chilly down here!" Pinkie acknowledged. She plopped down on her haunches and held herself with her forehooves, shivering exaggeratedly.


Trixie and Starlight walked passed Pinkie, who casually stood back up and hopped along with them. "So where are we gonna put her?" Pinkie asked.


Starlight paused and looked around. "Well, any cell should do," she acknowledged. She turned to the nearest cell, opened the door, and walked inside with Twilight. She hummed to herself and looked at the cold, gray stone walls. "How should we put her?" she asked.


"Trixie suggests chaining her to the wall so that she can't escape," Trixie stated.


"Oooh! That sounds great!" Pinkie agreed.


Starlight nodded, then levitated Twilight over to the wall and pulled the chains out. She secured the hoofcuffs to Twilight's hooves and let her hang against the wall. She tilted her head and hummed as she watched Twilight's limp form hanging from her bound, chained hooves. Twilight continued to breathe shallowly, still unconscious from the chloroform.


Pinkie plopped down on her haunches and tilted her head. "I kinda wish we had brought some cool whip so I could make a little mustache on her," she commented in a longing voice.


Trixie stared at Pinkie and raised an eyebrow. "You are more devious than Trixie realized."


Pinkie giggled playfully.


"So, how long before she wakes up?" Trixie inquired, looking at Twilight's body.


Starlight shrugged. "I'm not sure. It depends on how much chloroform she inhaled, and how quickly her alicorn physiology can deal with it."


"So what do we do now?" Trixie asked.


Starlight looked back at Trixie and Pinkie. "I brought cards?" she suggested.


Trixie nodded. "Trixie could go for that," she acknowledged.


Starlight smiled, then walked back out of the cell, closing the well-oiled door behind her, then locking it. She levitated a table over and set it down in the middle of the hallway, then she grabbed three chairs and positioned them equidistant around the table. She levitated out a deck of cards and set it in the center of the table. "We should probably decide on how we're going to play the role of the villain. What our goals are, why we ponynapped her... that sort of thing," she stated. She shuffled the deck of cards and started distributing them while Trixie and Pinkie sat down.


Twilight groaned softly, her head throbbing and aching with pain as she started to awaken. She rolled her head a bit and let it hang limply, not wanting to make the effort to hold her head up. She reluctantly blinked open her eyes, only to find a wall of darkness enveloping her. She inhaled and frowned. 'A... dungeon..?' She sniffed the air again. 'The Castle of the Two Sisters... and I'm in the dungeon...' she noted. 'Recently cleaned, too,' she thought. 'Is that pine? Huh.'


After a few seconds, she shifted her weight, only to find herself securely bound, tied up, and chained up against the wall. She blinked several times. She pointed her head to the right, then to the left, looking around without being able to see. She experimentally channeled magic into her horn, only to feel a creeping cold sensation informing her of the magic inhibitor ring secured around her horn.


"Trixie calls your bluff!" a voice stated matter-of-factly.


Another pony inhaled at length. "I don't think I'd do that if I were you, Trixie... Pinkie's beaten us both consistently."


There was a cheerful giggle and a snort. "Yep!"


A few seconds passed, and Twilight heard the sound of a card being turned over. There was a disgruntled sigh, then a groan and something heavy smacked into a table. "Trixie will never play cards with Pinkie again."


Twilight took a deep breath and shifted her weight again. 'Okay... then...' "Um..." she said aloud, trailing off as she noticed the muzzle's straps around her own muzzle. Her muzzle scrunched up in disgust, and her tail flicked once in agitation.


"She's awake!" a jubilant voice exclaimed.


"It's about time," a disgruntled voice muttered.


"I didn't expect her to be out so long," a calm, calculated voice said.


"Well, I did soak the cloth in chloroform for the whole day," the highest-pitched voice commented.


Twilight pursed her lips, going over her last memories before... nothing. She blinked as she recalled Pinkie stopping by, then asking her, '...if that cloth smelled like chloroform...' She blinked once, closing her eyes for several seconds before opening them again, and she slowly took a deep breath. "Right... that... I..." she trailed off and groaned. 'Did that really just happen..? Did I seriously do that..?' she thought in distress, not entirely sure how to react to it.


"That might explain it."


Twilight slowly shook her head. She heard three ponies landing on their hooves on the stone floor, then she listened to hear their approach as their hooves clopped against the stone, drawing closer. After a few seconds, they stopped.


"Hello, Princess Twilight Sparkle," Trixie greeted, sounding as self-righteous as ever.


"Hi, Trixie," Twilight greeted. For several seconds after her greeting, there was silence. "Hey, Starlight? Can you let me down? This really isn't that comfortable. Also, if you have some painkillers, that'd be great. This headache is terrible."


"Now, why would we do that..?" Starlight asked in a sensual, almost seductive tone. "Mmm... Princess, once you're out of our way, all of Equestria... will be mine..." she cooed. "And... why do you insist that you think you know us? You've never met us before, Princess... but we know all about you... Heroine of Equestria... Champion of Harmony... Bearer of the Element of Magic... Princess of Friendship..."


Twilight shuddered a bit as Starlight casually slid a forehoof across her body, and her tail twitched. "Now... with you out of our way, nothing will stop us from taking Equestria, and then the world!" Trixie exclaimed. "We will take our revenge on you for every slight you have inflicted upon us, and you will know our wrath!"


"Starlight, seriously. Let me down," Twilight replied.


"I'm not Starlight. Why do you keep insisting that? Your precious student will be dealt with soon enough... or... perhaps she will join us..." Starlight cooed.


"I recognize your voice," Twilight replied with disinterest. "How're you doing, Trixie?" she asked. "Also, Pinkie, was that really necessary? It's kind of embarrassing that actually worked..." she trailed off.


"Yep!" Pinkie exclaimed. "How else were we supposed to ponynap you?"


Twilight pursed her lips and tilted her head to the side in thought. "I suppose I can think of a few other ways," she commented.


"...they involve baiting you with books, don't they?" Trixie asked in an even voice.


Twilight blushed and shifted her weight. "N-no..." she squeaked defensively.


Starlight sort of just stood there, blinking and looking around aimlessly. "So, I should have disguised our voices," she acknowledged.


"Yeah, it really gave it away," Twilight replied. "Is Rainbow in on this too?" she asked curiously. "I'm sure she would have loved to see Pinkie doing that..." she muttered.


Trixie snorted. "Trixie cannot believe that you actually..." she trailed off and frowned. "Wait, Trixie wants to know how you know what chloroform smells like."


Twilight turned towards where Trixie's voice was. "...no reason," she replied.


"But Twilight, you did kind of say that it did smell like chloroform... when and where have you smelled that before?" Pinkie asked.


Twilight shifted her weight again."Boy, being tied up like this really is uncomfortable!" she said loudly, "It'd be great if you'd untie me and let me down from here!"


"Trixie wants to point out that you did not answer the question," Trixie stated flatly.


Twilight forced a laugh, "Ha. Ha. Ha..." She groaned and shifted her weight again.


Starlight, ignoring them, lit her horn, then cast a spell on herself to alter her voice. "Hello, Princess Twilight Sparkle," she roared, her voice rumbling as if the very dungeon itself was speaking, yet rough and coarse.


"Eep!" Trixie squeaked, jumping up into the air and turning around in one swift motion, her fur standing on end as she landed.


Pinkie giggled at Trixie. "See Trixie! You are a cat!"


"Starlight, you really should work on that spell. Your voice is kind of hard to understand like that. Maybe less boomy, and more... well, add a masculine touch to it," Twilight commented.


"...I'm not Starlight! I am Grave Buster!" Starlight growled.


"Starlight, I know you cast a spell to alter your voice. Really, this isn't funny..." Twilight muttered. "I could be at home reading right now!" she said in a desperate voice.


Starlight snorted, which came out as a horrific huff, then she dispelled the spell. "Fine," she groaned.


"Trixie thinks Twilight reads too much," Trixie stated.


Twilight shifted her weight and squinted at Trixie. "I do not!" she retorted. "Reading is good for you."


"Too much of a good thing can be bad for you," Pinkie commented.


"Can you just untie me, already?" Twilight asked in exasperation.


"Sure," Starlight replied. She walked over to Twilight, then used her magic to uncuff Twilight. The alicorn squeaked as she unceremoniously fell off the wall and landed on the floor.


Twilight groaned and shifted her weight, struggling to move a forehoof to nurse her chin. "...why not untie the rope first, then unchain me..?" she asked, slight ire at the edge of her voice.


Starlight smiled nervously. "S-sorry, I didn't think about that..." she said hastily. She used her magic to untie the rope around Twilight and threw it aside, then she unmuzzled the alicorn. Trixie picked the rope up and rolled it up, then held it beside her, along with the muzzle.


Twilight groaned softly as she rubbed her forelegs together where the rope had tied her and fluffed her wings. After a few seconds, she brushed the blindfold off with a forehoof and blinked a few times. Trixie levitated the blindfold off of Twilight's head and held it beside her. "You renovated the dungeon..?" Twilight asked.


Starlight shrugged. "I was bored," she stated, "Besides, I have some experience with decorating."


Twilight blinked, then looked at Starlight. "...the town you oppressed? All of the equal signs..?"


"Yes," Starlight answered with a nod. "I like to think I'm okay with decorating."


Twilight groaned and then stood up. After a moment, she looked up at her horn.


"Oh, let me get that," Starlight said. She reached over with a forehoof and slid the ring up and flicked it off her horn. She grabbed the ring as it flew through the air, then teleported it back to her dresser.


"...I'm not going to ask why you have a magic inhibitor ring powerful enough to subdue an alicorn," Twilight commented. She took a deep breath and ruffled her wings, glancing between her three abductors. "Right. I'm going to go now."


"Okay, Twilight! Bye, Twilight!" Pinkie said. She gave Twilight a hug, then hopped back.


Twilight lit her horn. "Oh, but first, one little thing..." she trailed off and smiled. "Starlight?"


"Yeah?" Starlight asked.


"We're going to have a nice, long talk when we get back to the castle..." Twilight replied. With a flash of magic, a magic inhibitor ring teleported directly onto Starlight's horn. Starlight blinked and her muzzle scrunched up as she glanced up at the metal ring. Twilight smiled enthusiastically and looked at Trixie. "Hey, Trixie? I'm going to borrow your rope and muzzle," she stated. "Oh, and don't you have a gag? I'll be borrowing that too."


"Why would-"


Before Trixie could finish, Twilight teleported Starlight, the rope and muzzle, and herself all back to her castle, leaving Trixie and Pinkie alone in the dungeon.


Trixie grimaced. "We're going to have to walk back now aren't we."

Author's Note:

I don't normally write comedy (and I'm not sure if I succeeded here), but I enjoyed writing this. I hope you've enjoyed reading it. If I made you smile, chuckle, or laugh, then I have succeeded.

Comments ( 37 )

Oh dear Lord.

"We're going to have a nice, long talk when we get back to the castle..." Twilight replied. With a flash of magic, a magic inhibitor ring teleported directly onto Starlight's horn. Starlight blinked and her muzzle scrunched up as she glanced up at the metal ring. Twilight smiled enthusiastically and looked at Trixie. "Hey, Trixie? I'm going to borrow your rope and muzzle," she stated. "Oh, and don't you have a gag? I'll be borrowing that too."

Wait, what?

8572152
Yes.

It's open ended.

I SO want to see what happens next! Somepony has some 'splaining to do!

Wait ... why would TWILIGHT have a magic inhibitor ring? And how did she know Trixie has a gag? ... Oh Twilight, you devious filly. :rainbowwild:

Please tell me that there is a sequel on the way

8573118
I have to second that

8573118
Well, it wasn't planned, but I might be able to come up with something...

Starlight picked Twilight up Twilight with her magic

then she twilighted her right in the twilight with her twilight behind her back:derpytongue2:

Teasing aside, this story was hilarious!

8573586
i feel like you icon would make for good cover art for the story

8575327
I could see that...


8574971
I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Also, fixed. Thank you for pointing that out.

I recommend you to do a sequel but kinaping rainbow, this didnt end well, so take it a first exercise un kinaping, and now the girls will do a better job with rainbow, or rarity, or applejack, perhaps you could do other sequels for the girls or princesess, and ir shining armor, etc, that could be fun :D

Also, shouldn't the title say "How to Ponynap a Bookhorse"?.

8576196
That sounds kind of like a fun idea...

And I'm using Bookhorse as a substitute Twilight's name, rather than a description of her... I think it is correct this way. ("How to Ponynap Twilight Bookhorse" sounds better than "How to Ponynap a Twilight Bookhorse." Or at least I think so.)

8576196
A sequel could be fun.

Well, you succeeded in making me laugh, so congratulations. If there are any Leverage fans here, there's a great 'does this rag smell like chloroform' joke in that show too. And, not to be that guy, but first paragraph should have 'enjoyable' rather than 'enjoying.' Fun read.

8580549
Fixed, thanks! :twilightblush:

I'm glad you enjoyed it and got a laugh out of it!

8572152

8572186

Well. That escalated quickly.

If you're going to ponynap Twilight, at least try to make it look like changelings did it.

"There is no possible way this can go wrong," Trixie sighed.

It's official now: It will go wrong in every way possible.
And since Pinkie Pie is involved, even in some impossible pays.

"Rock paper scissors?"
"Rock paper scissors doesn't work with three. I've tried before," Pinkie replied casually.

Ponies always seem to choose "rock" for some reason...

"Not that I want to do this sort of thing all the time. Enslaving a village was hard work."
"Oh, please," Trixie said in a high-voice, "The Great and Powerful Trixie enslaved Ponyville a hundred times better than you enslaved your town!"

:pinkiehappy:: "You should make that a contest! Each of you get one week to enslave Ponyville, and whoever did it better wins!"

I don't normally write comedy (and I'm not sure if I succeeded here), but I enjoyed writing this.

And I enjoyed reading this.
Good work!

8614174

:pinkiehappy:: "You should make that a contest! Each of you get one week to enslave Ponyville, and whoever did it better wins!"

This is brilliant! But who will be the judge to see who enslaved Ponyvilel better..? Celestia? Luna? No... neither of them have that kind of experience... Tirek? No, he'd destroy everything... Chrysalis? No... she was a terrible ruler. Wait, I know! Sombra can be the judge since he enslaved the Crystal Empire!

8614210
That could work!
As long as they offer him enough Crystals...

This song describes how I feel about practical jokes
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=pmv+weird+al+lyrics+larry&&view=detail&mid=C9742D985690E60D3982C9742D985690E60D3982&&FORM=VDRVRV

"Rock paper scissors doesn't work with three. I've tried before," Pinkie replied casually.

For humans, with 3 everyone puts out either 2 or 3 fingers. Odd one out is it. Wouldn't work with Ponies, though.

8614210
Let's be Evil had a similar but not same concept around the mane six playing at being villains. Could be interesting to make a current season version of a "which hero is the better villain concept" focusing on taking over a town like Trixie or Starlight did.

8685439
That was a pretty good story. I read it a while ago, but I kind of forgot about it until you reminded me of it.

8685635
To be honest I did too. I had to Google "fimfiction mane six try to be villains" to remember the name.

Why do I get the feeling that what Twilight did to Starlight would require this story to be rated M?

So, awkward...

Maybe I'm twisted but I imagined Twilight waking up and wondering why the kidnapping happened ahead of time this week, and where's the fuzzy handcuffs she usually gets

This...this is disturbing on sooooo many levels, and I ought to be really appalled by it...


....so why was I in the floor laughing like a hyena??? No, scratch that...a pack of hyenas.

Also:

"Hi, Twilight!" Pinkie greeted cheerfully. She stood up on her hind legs, then reached into her mane with a forehoof and pulled out a white handkerchief, then thrust it against Twilight's nose and held it there. "Does this smell like chloroform to you?"

Twilight frowned and inhaled deeply, sniffing the handkerchief. "Yes, Pinkie, tha-" her eyes went wide and her legs gave out from under her. In less than a second, she fell limply to the floor, with her legs splaying out beneath her.

...How the hell was that even successful???! Honestly, Twilight...don't you have any sense?!


Great story!

9206481
:rainbowlaugh:

I really should write a sequel to this. I've hard the start of an idea in mind since about two weeks after I published this, but I've just never gotten around to it.

But the real question is how does Twilight know what chloroform smells like? :duck:

9206536
:rainbowlaugh:Absolutely! I would love to see a sequel!!!

And yes...how does Twilight know what it smells like?:rainbowhuh::twilightsmile:

Trixie rubbed Starlight's withers with her hoof in an attempt to cheer her up. "The grrrreat and powerful Trixie! thinks you need to relax. Maybe let loose and have some fun. Trixie knows she would if she were in your place," she replied.

Cap. (Part of her stage name)
____________

Pinkie sat down on her haunches and looked aside in thought. "Maybe the ruins of the castle of the two sisters?" she suggested.

Cap (Proper name of the building).
_____________

Starlight ignored them and teleported all four of them to the Castle of the Two Sisters. No sooner than they arrived than was there a crack of lightning from overhead, serving as a foreboding, ominous warning to all of those who sought to challenge and or inhabit the Everfree forest at night.

Cap (name of forest)
________


9206605
That is something that would be fun to know.

Fascinating bit of trivia: we have been lied to about the effects of chloroform. It apparently takes roughly 5 min to knock someone out with it, similar to the various gasses we use for general anesthesia. So if someone does ask if something smells like chloroform you could actually offer your opinion on the scent, the wisdom of doing so is questionable.

9371760
That is fascinating! But now I have questions. First, how would one know what chloroform smells like? Second, I'm presuming that it can take so long because the chemical has to enter the bloodstream and travel to the brain in sufficient quantities to result in a knockout. Do you know if this is correct?

9371858
Unless you’ve worked with the stuff or were curious enough to go through the advanced chemistry to make a batch it’s unlikely many people would actually know what it smells like. As for the bloodstream, I assume so but am not sure. The article I read mostly focused on the historical uses in anesthesia and why it isn’t used for such any more. Evidently unlike ether it had a great deal of side effects. Drinking any amount is lethal and it can cause respiratory problems if you don’t get enough oxygen with it. Fascinatingly enough it also has a place in the Darwin Awards, as one winner used a rag soaked in the stuff to help his insomnia, he relied on his wife to take the rag away after he had fallen asleep, after a major argument (he had cheated on her if I recall correctly) he went to take a nap and she didn’t remove the rag, claiming she wasn’t aware he was napping.

"Trixie does not know whether to be impressed or concerned," Trixie acknowledged casually, trotting on in after them.

:rainbowlaugh:

"Hi, Twilight!" Pinkie greeted cheerfully. She stood up on her hind legs, then reached into her mane with a forehoof and pulled out a white handkerchief, then thrust it against Twilight's nose and held it there. "Does this smell like chloroform to you?"

Twilight frowned and inhaled deeply, sniffing the handkerchief. "Yes, Pinkie, tha-" her eyes went wide and her legs gave out from under her. In less than a second, she fell limply to the floor, with her legs splaying out beneath her.

Wait for just a second, if her answer before she was going to be cut off was "Yes, Pinkie, that smells like chloroform" Then that opens a can of worms as to how she knew what chloroform smelt like.

Twilight pursed her lips, going over her last memories before... nothing. She blinked as she recalled Pinkie stopping by, then asking her, '...if that cloth smelled like chloroform...' She blinked once, closing her eyes for several seconds before opening them again, and she slowly took a deep breath. "Right... that... I..." she trailed off and groaned. 'Did that really just happen..? Did I seriously do that..?' she thought in distress, not entirely sure how to react to it.

Lol, that moment was hilarious, though

Trixie snorted. "Trixie cannot believe that you actually..." she trailed off and frowned. "Wait, Trixie wants to know how you know what chloroform smells like."

Twilight turned towards where Trixie's voice was. "...no reason," she replied.

Now I really want to know how you know what it smells like... what did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO, TWILIGHT?!

Oh ho no ho...

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