After being dragged into a Pinkie Pie party, gathering the Elements of Harmony, and facing off against Nightmare Moon, Twilight Sparkle just wants a good nights sleep. Unfortunately for her, she lives in Ponyville, and somepony just crashed into her bedroom. Somepony that looks unusually like her... albeit more stallion-ish.
This stallion, Dusk Shine, claims to be an older version of Twilight, from an alternate universe. How come he's so different? Twilight never graduated from Princess Celestia's tutorage or learned to play the guitar, or... befriended her monstrous, demonic self?
Cover art by the wonderful Mix-Up!
Chapters (5)
Whelp, thanks for introducing me to Hamilton, my weekend is basically gone now. I also have a new item for my bucket list.
This better go on for a long while. This is quite interesting and entertaining.
Well I have seen plenty of humans being turned into Twilight Sparkle and living with her but not a Dusk Shine one how clams to her male alter ego form the future. I think he has a lot of balls or a lot lead between the ears if he think he can get away with his clam with out her magical adeptness or lime coordination to back it up. Still it is interesting to see that he is taking his situation in strides and try. What I wonder is the most is what happened between the time that he died and the time that he met Twilight? Did he strike a deal with the Fausticorn, or had time past long enough for him to have the chance to adjust a little to his new body or turns to his new situation, or he really is an happy go lucky clouts. Still this looks interesting to me and I hope to see more of this. What I hope this story won't be just the guy piggyback riding on the Mane Six's adventures and will actually have his own story to him in the back ground, I am hope for a Dusk/Luna shipping from this even as unlikely it is.
Absolutely going to read this after I finish the story I am currently reading.
Well this is interesting and I can't wait to see more
8012985 8013040 Thank you! I am planning on continuing this for a while. I've had this idea stewing for forever, and I want to get it realized.
8012900
I apologize XD
The same thing happened to me: someone I knew sang a song, and I was like: I need this in my life.
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*maniacal laugh*
8012989
Don't worry, I have great plans for him.
Well well well.
It's not everyday when you see a story that is heavily based on the first season(s). I miss those old times!
Well now. Let's see where this goes. But of course, don't forget to re-read the scenes and check for possible OP-ness. Just because you know what will happen, that doesn't mean interfering is the right way.
That and changing small events always have great effect on the future, so basically this event with meeting with NMM's change of flow already decided a different future.
Oh, how much I miss the wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff....
...
You need the Doctor.
-Zeph
Ok, I admit hit is interesting, just one thing, don't steal Twilight's protagonism too much, I know the story is about Evan, but Twilight too, they are like brother and sister now, so don't leave her in the background, or spike, or the rest, look for an equilibrium.
8014480 For sure. I hate it when ocs replace the m6 without good cause.
Very nice story. Keep it up.
It...wasn't bad, and I get at least some of what you wanna do here. But the MC just comes across as too calm. Like the "I have nothing left to lose so I'm going to attack a dragon with a small rock" kind of calm. The lack of emotions aside from amusement and haughtiness I feel from the MC is just too much. Also, Luna was from 1k years ago, its very possible insults on such a personal level were punishable by death. Dude was kinda seeking a smiting.
Rainbow didn't so much insult her as demand Celestia's location, and Pinkie, well, I'm pretty sure NMM realized just like everyone else that the pink mare was better ignored.
Correct!
Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go!
Found an small typo:
Should be "me".
'Dusk' does realize that they're going to get suspicious at some point... right? I mean, according to his story, he had friends, a family, and an entire life in another dimension. Which he does, technically, but they aren't the people he says they are. Ponies are gonna start asking questions if he doesn't freak out and start trying to find a way 'home'. Which, in reality, would be an absolutely terrible idea as it would either leave him stranded as a purple unicorn in our universe, or send him to the 63-verse. In either case the jig would most definitely be up.
As such he's kinda talked his way into a bit of a predicament, and he needs to start working on a better story quick.
8020549 Don't worry, I've got his return ticket handled
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The big thing I'm worried about is... okay, imagine you're in the Mane Six's place, actually, you know what? Make it worse, imagine you're in Spike's place. Twilight is the closest thing in the world you have to family. One day, a stallion version of Twilight comes along, talking about his own world with his very own assistant, Barb. Now try imagining how you would feel as day after day goes by and the stallion never actually seems to miss Barb. He's nice to you, if not a little quirky, but he has his own 'Spike' at home, whom doesn't even know if he's dead or alive, and doesn't seem all that interested in returning to her. Now, how would that revelation make you feel exactly?
I can't wait to see what will happen next, I hope Dusk will somehow make the time line go worst for the Mane Six that he won't be able to predict the out come anymore, of that the script isn't the same that he expected, that will teach him with messing you with history. Also, didn't the Mane Six hitched a ride on Steve castle in the pilot? I wonder if that will happen text. I am not sure sure that the lessons about showing the virtues of the element is really shown with Dusk's interference. I hope he doesn't get an Element to his name or gets something different form them.
8025515 correct. it does not change the facts that communism dont work irl.
8025515 True, but the memes are still funny.And yea, communism for sure does not work irl.
If I'm not mistaken, R63 Pinkie was most commonly called Bubble Berry.
Shining Armor -> Gleaming Shield, Princess Cadence -> Prince Bolero.
I'm not saying you have to change the names, these are always up to change whenever. But most commonly these are the ones used.
8030704 Fixed Pinkie. As for Cadence/Authentic, I'm keeping it because I'm not a huge fan of the name Bolero. I figure Evan either forgot or disliked the name too. Also, Authentic gets a cool Italian translation.
'My Love Authentic.'
8021568 There are some major events I'm planning on Evan rewriting. It will reach a point where it breaks entirely from the show.
Also, I am so freaking ready to get past the first two episodes. I have some fun things planned, but I've got to get to the SoL segments first.
8042569 that would be great. What would be nasty for him would that he is somehow becomes the Element of Magic instead of Twilight. But, Twilight still stray in Ponyville to help train Dusk in magic, and he is stuck to live with the webs of lies that he has spins to everyone around him. Still it would help to learn more about Dusk Shine's previous human life, to give him more substance to him.
8042562
Well, it's your call. I'm merely suggesting things.
Hopefully the fact that you fixed some names won't cause problems for the readers whom does not read comments.
8013407
Hmmm... the question is, how will be deal with the Butterfly Effect, menally speaking? Unless things are mostly "On-Rails"... also how is Dusk not flipping the fudge out? Or has he already done that?
any hope to see more of this story?
8155823 Yeah, for sure. I'm just working on figuring out wether or not I should fast forward kinda or just play stuff out.
Details here.
+1 on seeing more of this fun and entertaining story.
The Monk
Wow, I'm at the end already? That was quick.
Here's to hoping for more chapters soon!
Loved RWBY reference if it was intended.
8188343 Glad someone noticed it! Rwby is a fantastic show.
Such is the will of the general populace
making a heartsong out of Hamilton was absolutely genius! Thank you for this wonderful story!
8216066 Thanks! Seeing one of my favorite authors like my story is cool!
Sound better this time around, I wished I had the free time to do a cover art for this but I am busy at the moment. So does he start out with the same cutie mark? In what way do feel it's harder to write, is it the stress of attempting to do it perfect?
8623428 Hey, just the fact that you thought about doing cover art is awesome! Anyways, yes, Dusk has the same mark as Twilight. I'm not sure why it's harder to write, but it might be due to the fact that school keeps rearing it's ugly head so that's stressful. I'm also not that great at writing proper, peaceful slice of life.
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you've improved at lot sense you first stated, and it show, I wished that you had reworked the first original chapters, but I certainly understand necessary for you to not look back on other wise you will just be falling into an endless cycle of corrections and self doubt; so forging on and improving along the way is your best option. On another note, not getting the EoH out of the way is also probably a good choice as their would be left the uncertainty that they might have an influence on him later in the story plot, which could be interesting, or something else happens. Would be interesting to have the princess calling him out on his bullshit, and giving him in the attention of Celestia and Luna under different circumstances would make him look more suspicious about him. Would be fun to see him constantly confuse as Twilight's twin brother.
I might come back to you later on the cove art but if you would like to have a glimpse of what I can do you can look over there, enjoy.
https://amalgamzaku.deviantart.com
Did you just re-wrote everything? And this time it happened after the Nightmare Moon incident? You make me confuse! Worse, I have to re-read every chapters from now on.
Sweet new Reboot, thought with Dusk still as an Alicorn won't that be a little upsetting to Celestia then, after all if Twilight can figure out how her male counterpart ascent into an Alicorn she will know that it will happen to her and since she know's that Alicorns are Immortal she will be upset that she becomes one while she will have to watch her friends grow old and die then while she remains young unless she doesn't do what would ascend her into an Alicorn.
I remember seeing a story similar to this one, I am not sure from whom. It was a long time ago when saw it, so I don't remember that much.
To my Traking Folder, let's see how this goes.
Uh?
*Sees comedy tag*
You have my attention
So he is a alicorn. I knew from the synopsis he was from the "future", as to say, but the cover misled me.
Also, Herald of the Sky? How did he get that title? Maybe I'm too lost or its something that I'll see later on.
I remember this fic perfectly, dusk appeared before the nightmare moon stuff, not after, so you erased all again and start anew, why si that? anyway, as long as you continue I'm fine.
So.... is he an alicorn? He says "Prince", but you never actually describe what variety of pony he is.
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Dusk is not currently an alicorn. Reasons why will be given later.
You called this 'vanilla'? I would call it 'rocky road' or 'peanut butter cup'.
8632166 I did it for the song references! Vanilla is the best ice cream flavor don't hurt me.
8632182
Non-taken. I thought you were describing our protagonists. Also, vanilla is my absolute favorite flavor, so I kinda agree with you on that.