- Member Since 18th Apr, 2012
- offline last seen 31 minutes ago
Jade Ring
The purpose of a story is that it's a story. It can be more, but it can never be less.
Jade Ring
Joined 18th Apr, 2012 ·
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Jade Ring · 1.9k words · 70 6 · 1.4k views
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Hmmm... I have the strong urge to go to burning man now....
Tell me this is based on the original movie and not the one with Nicolas Cage.
7677218 -Chapter title shared with song from original film
-Paraphrased dialogue from original film.
-Chapter ends with video of song from original film soundtrack.
So... yes.
7678381 Intriguing. Though Mayor Mare, bless her, is no Christopher Lee....
7681949 Whoever said she was? Perhaps, in this adaptation, the Mayor isn't the most powerful pony in town.
I'm not expecting to see much more of Shining Armor.
I'm so hype for the Applejack encounter. She barely ever gets to be the big bad and especially not of the shadowy, mastermind kind so I'm really looking forward to seeing how she gets handled.
I'm really digging the worldbuilding here. Celestia rewarding worship and punishing those who do not is about as malevolent as I can see her feasibly being.
7666303 KILLING ME WON'T BRING BACK YOUR GODDAMN HONEY!
Apparently Flash is a transgender now.
Your
Well, that's certainly a Pinkie Pie.
Well, I'm thoroughly intrigued, in more ways than one.
Oh, hell. This is a universe I would never want to be in, and yet, at the same time, I want to read more of this story.
I stand corrected.
I guess you're saving the poisoned crumb cake for later in the story?
7699086 Now whoever said the crumb cake was poisoned?
7699116
Overtly? Nobody, but this isn't the kind of story where you just casually say things like:
Come on, that's a clear sign of equicidal shenanigans!
7678381 aww, can we at least have someone dressed up like a bear run up punch and knock somebody wearing braveheart makeup the fuck out?
ask
now
Cheerilee is the embodiment of troll Obi-Wan. And honestly, even knowing how this story is going to end up, most of what she's saying is ideologically sound.
7699732 And why would we have that?
7699732
7700295 I hate the remake with a burning passion.
That being said, there was going to be ONE joke/reference. Twilight would be napping on the ride to Ponyville and Shining would see her having a nightmare. She'd start screaming "No, not the bees!" and Shining Armor would wake her up. She'd then explain that the 'bees' in her dream were of the letter grade variety.
Because she's a nerd, you see.
But no. Such an obvious joke would mess with the serious tone I'm going for here.
7700435 I am fully in support of your hatred for the remake.
7700439
7700435 I've never seen either, only reviews mocking the remake.
Sorry, mate.
This was the best chapter yet. Twi and AJ's conversation was riveting.
Sentence structure seems to suggest Big Mac is talking, so why is there a female pronoun?
As for Applejack... I know they're into child murder, but I cannot deny that her argument works as both a brilliant deconstruction of Twilight Sparkle's character, the idea of Celestia as a god, and the Judeo-Christian faith.
And also, I do have to ask, as someone who hasn't actually seen the original film, how much of the dialogue in this is just a thinly ponified version of the film dialogue? Because I just watched the original film's trailer, and recognized at least one line as being completely unchanged between film and fic ('contemptible little liars').
7754197 90% of the dialogue is original. 5% is thinly ponified. 5% is straight quoted dialogue from the original film.
Not a real fan of this chapter, but I still like the story.
I see three Possible endings to this. Either you emulate the movie, or you'll make Twilight stay in ponyville sort of canon to the show.
Or, of cource, you make NMM return to prove celestia right and every heathen will BURN! BURN I TELL YOU! BURN! Ehrm... sorry. I love you story. Excellent writing! You will have a fav once it’s finished.
*Insert victory dance*
Oh, now they've done it. Twilight is going to go full rage mode on them and tearing the town apart for this. They all just signed their death wishes. May their deaths be slow and painful.
Mother of god. If I wasn't already half-crazy I'd be traumatized right now. Great job.
...
Huh.
You know, I don't think I've ever seen Cheerilee and Rarity shipped before.
I still want to see them all burn. Burn this town to the ground.
...
Well, it has been said that a cliche is not intrinsically bad, especially if it's used well. Still, the little sister actually being a daughter is so overplayed in this fandom, I will admit to a bit of cringe.
8781566
(Quickly goes back over chapter in a blind panic)
Uh... Sweetie Belle isn't Rarity's daughter. Or are you referring to Applejack and Apple Bloom?
8782195
"You'll simply never understand the true nature of sacrifice." Also, mention of fiance. Took that to imply that Rarity has been using half-truths to dodge the investigation, in that she's actually sacrificing her daughter and never had a sister. Glad to see I was apparently mistaken, though.
Im thinking this twilight would love hanging out with fred phelps
Ponies die. Faith shatters. All for naught.
Moral of the story: religion does more harm than good, but fertilizer and fungicides are great.
Nice seeing this through to completion even if I already new the story.
Found this story via its sequel "Old Mare", spent some time tonight playing a short interactive novel game on STEAM tonight based on the work of HP Lovecraft...perfect for getting into the mood to read a story like this one.
9674508
And what's worse, Celestia wouldn't even care, in the intro she was quite plainly a capital G god, at least in her view of the universe, everyone and everything is at best a toy for her to manipulate at her whims, at worst, she views them as I might view the floaty dust particles that are seen on a sunny day.
As distasteful as I find the prospect...I find myself agreeing a little bit. Twilight is oft shown being a bit...devoted to Celestia and knowledge, but this version takes it to a horrifying extreme. If this wicked version of Celestia said "kill" Twilight would happily see the streets awash in blood
So...AJ's Great something grandfather uses some sort of alchemy or magic on the Everfree, the Everfree being under the Desmenese of Discord or some other ancient powers (perhaps Harmony?) doesn't take this well and fought back, which in turn caused the townsfolk to start practicing ancient rites of sacrifice, possibly doing absolutely nothing at all to fix their situation, and further sacrifices even if it was the Apple Family aren't likely to help either...This whole thing brings to mind the idea that some untold generations later (provided Celestia doesn't go completely ballistic) a little filly or colt will find Ponyville by accident deep inside the Everfree and outside of a few odd smiles think nothing of it until they find a worn down house on the very most outskirts of town, and discover a horrifying truth.
On completely separate note, there was one detail in this story that confused me. In one of the early chapters, Pinkie Pie participates in Rumble's "coming of age" ceremony, and reveals to him that she did the same for his brother who if we use canon ages is around a decade apart or more. That begs the question, is Pinkie TRULY the adopted daughter of Mr. Cake? Is she even a pony?
11580465
Thunderlane and Pinkie came of age around the same time. Pinkie found this particular aspect of worship so enjoyable, that she became the personification of the rite of passage herself.
11580650
okay, so a SPECIAL party pony. Not the first time Ive read a story where her skills are not so 1-D as in the show.