• Member Since 29th Jan, 2012
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RainbowDoubleDash


I keep staring at that "Block RainbowDoubleDash" button, and I can't help but wonder what would happen if I clicked it...


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A town deep in the Mild West has been subject to repeated raids by the bandito bull King Longhorn and his gang of Cattle Rustlers. The only hope the desperate mares and stallions have is to journey to the border, and recruit ponies experienced with combat to help them fend off Longhorn and his marauders!

This is Pony Magnificent Seven, if you can't tell, it's just that "For a Few Bits More" sounds better. A Lunaverse story, part of the World Tour!

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 51 )

A lunaverse version of the Magnificant 7. I'm in :pinkiehappy:

Seeing Zecora take a more protagonist role is interesting, even if she isn't a member of the 7, and it should definitely help to further flesh out the character.

Also if I were to hazard a guess on the members of the 7 the character tags, I think it should be an interesting cast. I like the idea of you using the two least combat focused members of the L6. Yes Ditzy and Carrot Top will fight if they must but it's usually the likes of Cheerilee and Raindrops who steps up when the hooves start flying. I also like the idea of having members of the seven who themselves are also farmers. They understand why the town simply doesn't leave and honestly I think they would have a better chance of connecting with the villagers.

And yes, seeing the Big Mac character tag makes me happy :eeyup:. What can I say? Red Pony is best pony :derpytongue2:. Though I'm also looking forward to seeing BIg Mac and Ditzy share a fic again.

As to the chapter itself, I think it was good opening. It introduced the town and some of the characters that lived, showed the stakes and highlighted why the town simply can't afford to give in to the demands of the Longhorn and it introduced us to Longhorn. I do like this version better than the comics, here he appears to be everything a good western villain needs to be. He's ruthless, intimidating but intelligent enough that he puts on this mask of civility that does nothing to hide what a scumbag he is.

In short I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with this.

Ugh, I wanted to let this go, but as an amateur shipper, I need to get this out of my system.

Ñaco would have thought that Tamale would break off and head after his sister, since an older brother rarely missed an opportunity to torment a little sister, but Tamale kept after him instead, like he had the past few times. Some small, budding part of Ñaco didn’t really mind the attention that Tamale had been giving him lately, but most of him simply didn’t want to get caught, and so he kept galloping.

OOOOOoooooOOOOoooooOOOOOoooooo
...
...
Sorry. Finishing the rest of the chapter now.


Edit:

Most of them had a foal down there. All of them wanted to act – but with their foals so near…

Reminds me of Climbing the Mountain 2.

There was that, at least – Longhorn wasn’t the sort to hurt foals, at least not at the moment.

Honorable villain! Yay!

The saloon belonged to a pony named Chicha, yellow with a white mane with a cutie mark of a jug of juice. She was still behind the bar of the saloon, and probably would be ‘til the end of her days.

I already like her.

“If Longhorn steals one more harvest, we may as well cut our own throats and be done with it!”

Kinda dramatic, but accurate.

Caballerian wasn’t an especially hard language to learn, at least not its basics. Mazorca wondered if her sticking to Equestrian had anything to do with the fact that she had just rhymed both her sentences, the first that he had heard her say.

Ha... that sounds like Zecora.


I love how you're fleshing out your characters and setting the scene, and while I haven't seen Magnificent Seven (due to being a teen who isn't into westerns or bloody stuff) I can already tell that this'll be fun to read. Keep doing what you're doing! :heart: :pinkiehappy: :heart:

A good start. I'm really interested in a Western pony story, so I look forward to seeing how this goes.

Codsarnit! You have managed to get every spaghetti western song I know stuck in my head with only the summary! A thousand curses upon you! But still a great story.

What is the Pony Magnificent Seven?

7439200 Yes, I know pony Seven Samurai, but what is pony Magnificent Seven?
Gee... I wonder :trollestia:

Well, I'm not sure how well you will be able to do in comparison with the originals masterpieces, but why not?

It strikes me here especially with the Westernish setting...but why not have wanted posters of those on Celestias side? Seems like it'd fit in well here. And also give the townspeople a reason to maybe not trust her, or to possibly try to take her for bounty money or something. Just seems like something that should exist.

Beyond that couple typos throughout the piece, but your writing style remains very nicely strong. Can't say that I don't wish this was another main story mover piece though as it really does seem like this season has dragged on a bit long. Still, thanks very much for sharing and I look forward to reading more of this.

Interesting. They'll NEED to finally get inside Zecora's head to see WHY she serves Corona. Personally, I think it's the rather annoying reality that outsiders like her simply don't understand how messed up L!Celestia's going rogue made the Equestrians. She sees a baffling anomaly to correct, not a horrific betrayal to atone for.

¡You finally try inverted punctuation! ⸘Is it not the bestest thing evar‽ ¿What is your favorite inverted punctuation-mark? I like inverted interrobang best.


RDD is writing another story! And there's going to be :derpytongue2:/:eeyup:! Yay! :pinkiehappy:

But that means I need to get cracking on my own World Tour story. Eeek! :twilightoops:

I was expecting Zecora to propose that the town ask for aid from Corona, or her salamanders. Then again, they don't have that long, so reinforcements might not be able to get there in time. It's good to be reminded that Zecora is a good zebra, even if she's on the wrong side.

7440488
Actually I find it to be incredibly annoying, but since it's a quirk of Spanish and the ponies of the village up there speak Caballerian/Spanish, I'm using it for a more authentic feel.

7440643

In the SkypeChat, everypony loves your use of inverted punctuation and cannot wait for you to use inverted interrobangs.

This seems like it should be fun, in particular the closer look at Lunaverse Zecora.

7440081 I think Zecora knows EXACTLY how messed up Celestia is right now, but she also saw a future where Celestia was back on the throne, sane again, so she's there to make sure that future doesn't become impossible.

7442819 It's like she's Pinky in Cracked's interpretation of Pinky and the Brain: someone put there to keep the maniac from doing much damage and trying to make her not crazy.

Well I was going to take a look, until it turned out to be part of some alternate universe.

7448505
You could, of course, check out the AU anyway.

7448751

The group has over 100 fics. You think I have time for that?

7449098
Maybe? I don't know. You had time to go into a story you weren't going to read in order to tell the world that you weren't going to read it; I assumed that frivolity was in the cards.

You don't need to read all of them, anyway; our main page has a New Readers link that takes you to a page where the "important" stories are listed. Just read them in the order provided if you absolutely must catch up.

Although, heck, even that isn't needed; here are the necessaries:

- 1,000 years ago, Celestia went mad instead of Luna and became Corona, the Tyrant Sun; unlike the TV show, Corona is still at-large. Also, her goal is simply to rule Equestria, not cause eternal daylight (since that would kill everyone).
- Zecora the Zebra is working with Corona for vaguely-defined reasons; something about a prophecy and the knowledge that Corona must be free come this summer or bad things will happen.
- The Elements of Harmony are:
- - Magic: Trixie, who is the Luna's Representative of the Night Court to Ponyville (basically a glorified messenger);
- - Honesty: Raindrops, who is a weather mare in Ponyville (Rainbow Dash is her boss);
- - Laughter: Cheerilee, who is still a school teacher;
- - Loyalty: Lyra, who is a musician and in a relationship with Bon Bon;
- - Kindness: Ditzy (an old alternative name for Derpy that we've stuck with), who is a mail mare for Ponyville and the mother of Dinky Doo;
- - Generosity: Carrot Top, a carrot farmer in Ponyville who suffers from occasional bouts of jealousy concerning the success of the Apples
- Other nations outside Equestria notably exist and do things and are understandably concerned about six random ponies, all Equestrian, being the bearers of the most powerful magic in Ponydom
- So as of this fic the six of them have basically split into groups of two and are touring outside Equestria to build goodwill.

There we go, that should be enough.

Comment posted by Mugen Kagemaru deleted Aug 6th, 2016

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He lies. They all made fun of him. Not in the bullying way, but it was a jest all the same.

I was away doing other work not related to the L!verse or FiMFiction at all.

My only comment upon my return was that he still has much to learn before he grasps American English.

Yes! Zecora isn't an antagonist this time!

7456294

I and Malola Exeggutor had a ball with inverted punctuation, so the statement is true.

7439155

:rainbowlaugh:

Channel your inner Yule Brenner. It helps.

7471588
See, Yul Brenner got his start in Magnificent Seven, but every time I hear his name I'm instead compelled to think about what I first heard about him in:

(It's a reference to his role as King Mongkut of Siam in The King and I)

7472477

Every time I think of him, its either Magnificent Seven or Westworld
Not so sure I really trust tech anymore either. :pinkiehappy:

Just saw the remake starring Denzel Washington and Chris Pratt. Gotta say, I really enjoyed it!

(I've seen 7 Samurai, but haven't actually seen the original Magnificent 7... keep meaning to, though).

they’d have to be a mighty magnificent seven…”

I liked this chapter. A bit more action and chance to get introduced to potential members of our magnificent 7.

The scene Little Strongheart was great. It showed that Big Mac incredibly strong but not infallible and was good first introduction to what Braeburn would bring to the group. It also showed why the village would go to him for help, aside from his big size.

So not only is Carrot Top smitten with Braeburn but Ditzy too? Dang, that's what I call swag. Though I can't help but feel bad for Big Mac, he could have his pick of almost any mare he wants but the one mare his interested in eyeing his cousin. That must sting.

It was also nice seeing Carrot Top's jealousy of the Apple Family and particularly AJ cropping back up since that had originally been a pivotal part of her personality.

All in all, it's a good second chapter and I look forward to seeing what happens next.

That opening...:rainbowlaugh: I thought for a minute that you'd gone completely crazy, then I figured out what was going on.

The two were sitting at a thoroughly disreputable saloon, or the closest that this town could manage to such. Ditzy strongly suspected that the disreputable appearance was part of the appeal – the weapons on the walls looked like replicas, the “dirt” on the tables and floors was, on close inspection, simply a paint job, and the wait staff had been very friendly (and for that matter, Ditzy had never heard of a disreputable saloon with a wait staff, or menus).

:rainbowlaugh:BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Ditzy, stop making goo goo eyes at Braeburn! :twilightangry2:
You're supposed to be making goo goo eyes at Big Mac. :yay:

Buffalo, as a close cousin race to cattle, did not have the inborn connection to the land that earth ponies had and were not generally quite as strong at lifting or dragging things…but once they started moving, Mazorca had thought them impossible to stop except by putting solid stone in front of them.

I wonder if that's an entirely natural ability or if there is some sort of cattle / bison magic which makes them hard to stop once moving? The juggernauts of the Equestrian world?

Her voice broke when she saw one of the ponies Big Mac, and next to her Carrot Top was aware of Ditzy’s wings suddenly and instinctively spreading wide as she caught sight of him too. He was, in a word, gorgeous – his mane, a very similar color to Carrot Top’s own, was long and wavy about his head and neck, tucked beneath a somehow immaculate Stetson hat despite the perpetual dust that lingered on the edge of the Mild West. His fur all but shined, too, the muscles beneath it taught and tight but also supple and yielding when need be, most notably in his uncovered hindquarters, which looked immensely strong from what was probably many seasons of bucking apples from trees…

Bad Ditzy! You're supposed to be paired up with Big Mac, not his more handsome cousin!

A very nice chapter indeed!

I really liked seeing some of Carrot Top's jealousy coming back onto the table, since we kind of forgot about that for a while. I don't know why, but I also got a chuckle out of Applejack kind of just spelling out what the setup of the rest of the fic will be. Little Strongheart was, of course, adorable.

Looking forward to the next chapter, boss!

Well, Braeburn might be the Element of Man Candy but well, we'll be seeing the Return of the Mac by the end of things.

7610130 Don't worry, I bet Braeburn will be more interested in Little Strongheart :p

How was I not following this story?!

Braeburn and Zecora are two of my all-time favorite characters outside of the Mane Six, Big Macintosh is a gem, and Derpy and Carrot Top are my favorites of the Lunaverse Six. All of this portends awesomeness.

I have to salute you for giving the different cultures you have the characters encounter a distinct language and unique feel to them. (Griffon being German, Zaldian being Basque, etc.) It really helps emphasize things.

Can't wait to see this updated.

Well, I have never seen The Magnificent Seven. I have seen Seven Samurai though, so at least I'll have something similar to compare this to.

Finally got around to reading this, its really good. Thumbs up from me.

7449186

Actually there's a few episodes on DVD from S1 - S3 that call Derpy, Ditzy Doo (most memorable was Winter Wrap Up). And she was originally named Ditzy until a bunch of retards raised a stink forcing HUB to re-do the episode with the name change of Derpy. And I kind of like that our AU sticks with that name, it's a lot better than Derpy Hooves.

Y’all came in from that direction, an’ the bandits had some buffalo.

Ya
___________

Maybe he was referring to Applebloom! And that would make sense, Applebloom was only a filly.

She put extra emphasis on nice to make it clear how nice it would be, even if Applejack turned out to be there instead of Applebloom

Apple Bloom
________________

I look forward to the next chapter. This is a rather interesting story so far ^_^.

7639662

Seven Samurais was a great film ^_^.

I know it's shameful to comment having not read a word of it, but I simply have to know which version of 'seven samurai' inspired this one. There are more than a few different versions of the magnificent seven just as there are many versions of a fist full of dollars, and I've probably seen them all.

7977651
Well, I've seen the original Seven Samurai, the anime Samurai 7, and both versions of The Magnificent Seven...and A Bug's Life, and "The Magnificent Ferengi", so it's sort of a hybrid of all of those...with my own personal touches, of course, as well as references to other Westerns where I can fit them in. My grandfather is a huge fan of The Duke, for example, so I'm basing King Longhorn after John Wayne, albeit a villainous interpretation of him.

It'll probably draw most strongly from the original version of The Magnificent Seven, though. In particular the opening chapter has King Longhorn repeating almost word-for-word was Calvera said to the villagers, albeit, again, in a John Wayne-y fashion.

7977686
Really, you didn't see the TV series? I only watched six episodes before I got bored with it but it had Ron Perlman
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Magnificent_Seven_(TV_series)
Naturally, it wasn't as enjoyable as Brisco County Junior... which I still bought on DVD even though I probably only saw eight episodes of it anyway.

I'm really expecting Bloomberg to wind up being some manner of Deus Ex Machina in this story now with Applejack hauling it along with them. It just feels like the perfect setup! :pinkiehappy:

Great chapter though! I've eagerly been awaiting this one and it didn't disappoint!

Oh YES! Funny story, I was thinking JUST last night "Did I remember to track this so I'd know when it would update?" Then BOOM, update!

I flippin' love Braeburn and having him show up--and hopefully Zecora too--just makes me grin all over. Cannot wait to see more.

Kinda curious what your response to Trixie's portrayal in Season 6 was like.

Somehow I believe that bloom berg will make a rather impressive impact through out the story. :derpytongue2:

I am liking the turn out for the 7. It's a good variety of personality and ability. Though doesn't having Bloomberg make this the Magnificant 8? :derpytongue2:

:rainbowlaugh: AJ ships Big Mac and DItzy too? Oh that's brilliant.

I liked how this chapter addressed how CT still is jealous of the Apple family and how supportive Ditzy was. I'm also really looking forward to seeing a bit more of Alchemist CT. :pinkiehappy:

7977712 Bloomberg will be the hero who pins down King Longhorn, and the town will give the job of sheriff to the tree! And a medal!

and Tom the Boulder will be his deputy...

Carrot Top glanced away and hummed quietly to herself, suppressing a sudden desire for peaches.

Yeah! Peachie is ten times better than that hunk of Applewood, maybe even a hundred!

Ditzy stuck to a Surly Temple from the kid’s menu

I love how even a 'disreputable' saloon has a kid's menu, ponies just aren't that good at being bad.

Then she considered some possibilities and decided she didn’t really need to know if one of her ancestors had been some kind of bomb-throwing anarchist that eventually settled down or went into hiding.

So that's what happened to Carrot Guevara!

7979765

Sounds like we have ourselves a TV series pilot! :pinkiehappy:

Truthfully, I never saw Applejack as being "mishandled" in season 1; she always seemed fine to me, keen on following the rules and caring about everyone. The problem was that she clearly had a kind of Supermare Syndrome, fueled in part by untrue/exaggerated family lore: She really cared about everyone in Ponyville, and believed that she could help everyone in Ponyville, but because of that bad lore, believed that only she could help everyone in Ponyville.

She tried to pull all the other farmers under the Apple Trust umbrella because she believed that doing so would protect them from misfortune, and tried to get as much of the spoils from competitions as possible because she believed that she knew best how to use them, again because of bad family lore. When she got angry with and started lashing out at her neighbors, it was because she believed they were actively working against their own best interests and she was trying to save them, even if she was just tilting at windmills. She threatened Berry Punch, for example, because she believed both that Berry was making a mistake and that she knew best by virtue of all the good she'd done (she in fact believed that she held power and rulership, even if she did not recognize this fact), and genuinely believed that everyone had gone crazy when they refused to let her exert power over them.

Her fear of the Trust taking Sweet Apple Acres away from her was not really born out of losing her home, or her position or her salary, but out of the belief that if they took it away from her, it would be a declaration to all the world that she was weak, and that she couldn't help and protect everyone she always promised to, and that she was a bad pony because of it. Sure, that's hardly reasonable, but then again, neither is a mare faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

Far from being mishandled, I thought Applejack was one of the more complex and interesting supporting characters from season 1.

Singular for "Tamales" is "Tamal". "Tamale is an error in translation which has become standard in English.

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