• Member Since 10th Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen Dec 24th, 2018

Krass McWriter


And thou camith down Krass who holdth the commandments, he pointed out thou sinners who had broketh thy rule and he broughth down his ban hammer to bare. and all was good. -ArchangelDoom

Sequels1

E

John Norris is another broken man in the last days of humanity. It has been years since he last left his apartment for something outside of restocking his food and water supply. Enter Azure Wind, a young pegasus colt, bearing a letter that explains he is his son. The two bond and much is learned by both in this light hearted comedic tale.

A conversion bureau fic.

Now with 27.6% More Sequel!

Find it Here!

Chapters (19)
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Comments ( 281 )
#1 · Jul 23rd, 2011 · · · Part 1 ·

I can see it! ALL OF IT!

Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.

Don't really even need to read it on here, considering I've read everything on the Google Docs version. :twilightsheepish:

Anywho, 5-Star, Fav, great fic. Yaaaaaaaaaay.

she was running hers, i started raining i believe you mean it

Awesome Story, I really like it. Feels like something I would want to write ;). I hope to see many more updates in this charming little series :D.

Great story so far. If there is more, i will gladly read it.

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66028
There is PLENTY more acutually.

I think I have about 15 pages out, but not here as of yet.

Thing is, this is a compiliation. Not a bit by bit. Expect an update soon as I finish pt 12. Pt 13 is already 3 parts squished into one and will be posted alone. Epiloue will have its own post as well.

Your'e back

106668
>implying I left and this isn't just a compiliation

I am so loving this, and so desperate to see it continue. This really is a fascinating work, and the current twist quite surprised me. I look so very much forward to seeing where this story goes.

Love this story. I'm always happy to see it update.:pinkiesmile:

#11 · Jan 4th, 2012 · · · Part 3 ·

come grab your friends and go to very distant lands jake the dog and finn the human. yeah i got the joke.

"mister bad got it good but this an't his naborhood he's takeing over." is what i have to say about per

"human remnants" ? laying it on a bit thick aren't we, princess?

Also damn you, now I have to go re-read it again to remember who "gray" is.

107632
That speech took longer for me to get it to a point where I don't hate it than it did for me me to et EVERYOTHER PART COMBINED to a point I like.

(I wrote this between about Five days of actual writing. Three of these days was that sppech.)

I am not very good at speeches.

If you can fix it, please. Help a brother out.

106985
I have looked at this seven times at the time of this post, just to make sure it actually happened. Why? That takes some explaination.

As you may or may not know, I am a US Infantry soldier. I fight the fight. I go out there with my friends and make the sacrifices that keep my country free . I stand ready to make the ultimate sacrifice. I do this so that not only my country, but the whole human race may reach a new glourious heights in peace. I believe in us as a species and as individuals.

Now, I love your style. I love your works. I hate your future. It shits on everything I and my friends fight to protect. In some cases died fighting. Now I'm no thin skinned ass hat, I'm ok with the world being shit. Its just that every chapter of everything ever given your stamp of approval never shuts up about how shitty humans are. Wether it be a character trying to get away from their human past, or a human being an asshole or what have you. It was in tolerable levels in 'The Big Respawn' but its nigh unbearable in all your other works.

That being said, I am deeply flattered that you think so highly of my quaint little fic. As I have put out earlier, the remaining updates will be here soon after they are on ponychan.

107950
That's a bit harsh, and is as overly praising of the country you love easily as much as you say Chatoyance's stories shit all over humanity. You're the descendant of immigrants that has caused what would be called mass genocide if it was taught more, you galavant about the place as an invader of other foreign countries that your government claims to be "liberating" in the name of peace when the real obvious cause is money, wealth, power and oil. You're a privileged white male in one of the most well-developed countries on the planet, which has amongst the highest teen pregnancy and suicide rates in the world, which has spent the last fifty years trying to ignore that it segregated half the population according to skin colour and still segregates the other half based on reproductive ability, in some cases treating them like cattle, and has within its own borders what amounts to a third world country and quite possibly one of the worst levels of public health care and education around.

Excuse me, get off my lawn.

I know I am privaliged. I know America is one the best places to row up, hell majority of us have cars, a roof and money in our pocket! That's the top 8% of wealth! Suicide rates? Yep. I walked in on friend who did just that when I was younger.

Now was I really being unfair? All I said was I had a problem withjust a small detail in her stories. I even explained why. If I was to be offensive, I would have said choicer words.

Chatoyance, I do not mean to offend and apologize if I did. I merely intended to clarify some thins. I think your stories are some of the best amon the TCB fics. I can't wait to see what you cook up next.

Sometimes wisdom can come from the silliest of places. I think of the first 'Men In Black' movie, the line "A person can be smart, but people are stupid." That fairly sums up my attitude toward humanity.

I think an individual has the potential to be more than just a murderous naked ape, and I revere personal devotion to honor, justice, loyalty, and above all, compassion. Humanity has some marvelous ideals, just wonderful ideals.

But I honestly don't think we, as a species, can live up to those ideals, at least not for long. I think history so utterly bears out my premise that it just makes me sad to even delve into it. We're hunter-gatherers, no different from anyone 50,000 years ago, only our evolved tendencies and biological directives are no longer useful, and indeed work to destroy us, now that we have technology.

If we controlled our reproduction, shared resources equally, dropped all cultural and religious affiliation and strove only with pure reason and pure compassion, Earth could be a stable, self-sustaining paradise. We've had 10,000 years of agricultural bounty to accomplish this, and all we have done is built empires out of blood and misery so that an elite few can enjoy living like gods while the majority of humanity barely scrapes by.

I think that 10,000 years is long enough to make a true judgement of the soul of a species. This is why my stories depict our world as it currently is, only hypertrophied; the horror made larger, more visible, and more obvious. But I have changed nothing; my future is our present, just with more people. I write about our world now, 'twenty minutes into the future' as Max Headroom put it. The favelas are now, in most nations. They are starting to form in the US, as our economy finishes dying off, as our empire falls.

I may despise the human animal but I do not hate the individual. Humans cannot help what they are; they are products of their biology; it drives them to excess, domination, violence, selfishness, greed, and acquisition. These are all traits that would be a positive good on the veldt, 50,000 years ago; a tribe led by a sociopath would eat well and have many offspring - they would be successful. But that success would come at the cost of the misery and death of any other tribe they met. This is our operating system as a species. This is why the world sucks so badly; why we do not live in a Star Trek wonderland right this minute. This is why the streets of my home, Olympia, are covered with starving, homeless families clutching their ragged children on rainy, cold street corners.

I am not offended; I applaud any person who tries to do what they think is right and good as best they can. I once thought that something could be done to save this silly world; I know what that feels like. I remember how fiercely I once defended the virtue of Mankind myself, long ago. I bear no ill will to any soul who still thinks Man has some redeeming value as a species; I just respectfully disagree - I think the animal is hopelessly broken.

Maybe, one day, we can fix that broken nature; perhaps through genegineering, singularity, or some as yet unknown intervention to change the essential human essence. My own hope is represented through my love of Conversion Bureau stories; the ponies of Equestria are a symbol for me of some potential total change that might save humanity from itself. I'll never see that world; all I will get in my lifespan is a world of increasing poverty, the loss of my country to fascism, and most likely total economic collapse. All against a backdrop of perpetual, global war. This is now. I see it every day.

How could I not write about the impossible hope of getting to become a creature better-than-man and going to live in a fantasy land. It embarrasses me to say it but it is basically the same thing as imagining that heaven is real. I write heaven porn.

And, ultimately, so does anyone who writes transformation stories. What is the point of being turned into a pony, except that the idea is exciting - and it excites because it is functionally identical to being turned into an angel; suddenly one is innately kind, part of a group that accepts almost unconditionally, governed by an incorruptible eternal authority. It's childhood really: mommy Celestia will kiss the boo-boo that is the Earth and make it all better.

Every Conversion Story is really about wanting the worldview we had as children to somehow actually come true; the world suddenly really is truly good, people are truly good, and authority is truly good and magic is real. That is not reality at all. Not in the least. I think every Conversion Bureau author, deep down, is a person angry that the world they believed in as a child turned out to be a lie. I think that is our common, basic motivation with this subgenre. Ponies let us imagine that good world once more.

Every Conversion Bureau story depicts humanity as nasty and the Earth as awful. Some just depict it more starkly than others. I'm in the starkly obvious camp; Krass Mc Writer puts a little more lipstick on the pig than I do. But, let's face it, the only real difference between our visions is that I am more 'in your face' about it. I'm rude about it; Krass is kindly towards humanity; but the world presented is still far less desirable than Equestria - it cannot help but be. If Equestria was worse, there would be no story; humans would universally fight it because there would be no temptation to go pony.

And Equestria can be described as better because -whether we believe in humanity or not- the fact is that Earthly life is pretty sad. This is not a new realization. We've pretty much been inventing pretty fantasy worlds since the first shaman stood up and proclaimed an afterlife.

Krass and I really write the same, exact thing. I'm just angrier, so I depict the dichotomy between Equestria and Earth in sharper, more black and white terms. I can see how that anger in my works could piss some folks off.

And for that, I am sorry, Krass. I do write dark, angry visions of the humanity; visions magnified so all the warts show clearly. I know that isn't kind; though I do think it also isn't false, either. Still, I am sorry if my work pisses you off at all. That isn't my intent, if that means anything.

Of course I like your work, Krass: you write well, your characters are fun, and I adore the relationship between a pony and his father. I like your world, and I like your vision of humanity too. Why wouldn't I?

It's delightful!

108522
Heh. You know I've been to legitmate 3rd world shitfests. I've seen war. I still believe. But I know opinions and the like are best when exxplained and not pushed, and any further would be pushing it. You see the world in a way I just don't. I think this should be left simply as that.

And I am surprised that anyone likes this. I always am surprised anytime someone tells me I do l somethin good. I very rarely like anything I write. I can only think of maybe three works across the entirety of about five years of attempting to write that I am satified with. Two are poems, the other isn't AAF. Don't get me wrong, I am quite fond of writing it and the story as a whole, I know it can be better and that is why I'm shocked people like it. I'm a little bit of a perfectionist when it comes to writing, and people liking it in its imperfection is just odd to me as its writer. I'm sure my story is actually quite a good read, I've been told it is enough times at least. Its just isn't as good as it can be is all. That fact is undeniable. Now imagine how surprised I am when some actually good at writing says they like it. When I first saw it, I stared at it for a good while out of disbelief.

Oh, and before I forget, who does your cover art? Its quite lovely, and I would like to get some done for AAF. I have what I want in mind, I just suck at drawing.

109001

I do my cover art myself. I never feel like I am very good, so I really appreciate the kind words! Tell me what you need - what sort of image you want to convey, what mood, or what scene - and I'll try to do art for you. Let me know if you want text in the image, like I do for my own stories or not, and what kind of style you wish; realistic or more MLP cartoon, that sort of thing. I'll give it a go, anyway!

I do want to reiterate that you really do have a good story going here. I'm not saying there aren't things that struck me wrong a bit (Chapter 8 was a little bumpy for me), but then I feel even more strongly about my own works. I always feel like I am a total failure when I publish a chapter; all I can see are the things I think I failed at, or the things I feel I should have done better - or worst of all, like 'how can I even think I have the right to dare to stick my crap out there at all?'. I have lots of self doubt.

I think you are a very good writer, and that your story has power to it. Please feel more confident; one thing must stand as true no matter what - you have people following your story and clearly enjoying it! That is a reality that kind of denies a lot of self doubt, right?

I have read that there is only one crime for a writer; to be boring. You are never that. Quite the opposite. So be proud of your work!

109232
http://bit.ly/iwMxoA This is a link to the Improved part 1. Its quite simple really, Azure on John's 'doorstep' (Though it being a condo penthouse, its more of a hallway) holding a letter in his mouth. A full description of this is in said link.

As for part 8, I'm actually rewritin this as we speak. I have CQ tomorrow. Stuck in a room with nothing to do but write. I should Get it finished by late Friday as latest.

A saying that I find to be quite true in regards to writing: We are our own worst critics, for only we know what could've been.

I like the new cover image/art you got for this fic.:twilightsmile:

109486
Stop making up! I'm trying to be mad at you!

...okay, I think I came off as a huge arse. I think I'm going to continue to come off as a huge arse, but what the fuck. I flew off the handle because I mistook you for a jarheaded oo-rah type who thinks his rifle is bigger than his gun, and because you were raging against the realistic, if unpleasant, characters in Chatoyance's stories rather than other, shoddier ones. I personally think you're angry at them because you have seen people just like them. I know I have.

As I have said elsewhere, I do not believe that is all there is to her world, and I actually think her first story was the worst, but I also feel that without those faults in humanity being played to absurdity, and without those apparent boons of ponification being played up to similarly silly levels, the impact of the story would have been far less. I think it went too far, but I also think it was somewhat necessary. I think your dismissal of her and her stories rankled, because it is like burying your head in cotton candy and pretending the earth isn't a shithole for a large percentage of the population and barely tolerable for most of the rest.

I should not let my high distaste for the military overrule how much I look up to the soldier. The former is a tool wielded by governments whilst the latter is a person with ideals to protect the rest of humanity, hopefully for the better. The military you belong to, however, is a very heavy and blunt instrument wielded by the most vicious and angry of naked apes. I am sorry, I do not wish to give you a backhanded compliment, so I had better just state outright that I do not believe any war this century has been justified, and not a single one of them has been handled correctly - that does not mean I despise the soldier who wishes to truly liberate, even whilst invading, I just think they are misled. This is why I could not be a soldier, I think too highly of my own ideas and ideals. Shockingly ego-inflated of me, I know. I think, in fact, that the monumental clusterfuck of wars we actually really have would be hard to top as a reason for going pony, and the disgusting behaviour of firms like blackwater are a disgrace to the human race.

Alongside those real reports, Chatoyance's worst characters seem almost saintly.

I should say I believe in humanity, very strongly, but I also know that humanity is a vicious animal with a thin veneer of civilisation. I fully agree that removing the monkey and replacing it with pony would solve most issues we have - that is, however, fantasy. We can, I truly believe, manage to create a utopia without that, but it will entail becoming something other and better than human. I'm trying to explain that I fully embrace what I am, which is why Chatoyance's stories ring true for me, but that I also aim to rise above it... which entails becoming something other than a naked ape.

There, you may now feel free to despise, pity, ignore or flame me.

ok excuse me but i am here to give my own two cents

I agree with midnight on the "whole the world is screwed" thing I strongly believe that all things come to an end it is an inevitability
but after a fall and the dark age a new civilization will come that will be better, cause if you look at history for instance Rome was very powerful they even developed a type of steam engine now they just used it as a toy but they made it one of the main problems with Rome was slavery but lets look at it at that time every civilization had slaves it wasn't tell recently that the west did away with slavery now when i say recently i mean in the last couple of hundred years this is a improvement a small one but an improvement non of the less so
yes this age is coming to an end every nation is doomed that also means china because they are economically dependent on the US
and well when we fall they fall slowly but they will we are their primary consumer so we are all screwed the world is doomed
the only way we will ever learn is if we learn from the past which most people choice to ignore.

That includes the US if you don't know I hate no group of people i just am looking at this from the sidelines do i want this to happen no
but is it probably that is why I like these story's they ask a very personal question are we worth saving or are we doomed to self destruct

OK GEEZ FUCK GUYS!

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE STORY NOW?!

CAN THIS BE OVER?!

ok ok ok for sum reason your comment amuses me :pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:
111900

#26 · Jan 6th, 2012 · · · Part 4 ·

108522
John Solomon was right.
You are a complete loon.
Video related: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hfYJsQAhl0&feature=related

Saaaaack!

I enjoyed the lost chapter- I was nearly rolling from laughter after I read it. any plans for more lost chapter stuff, also loved the new part WHAT A :twistnerd:

#28 · Jan 6th, 2012 · · · Part 4 ·

Dat guy should be, like arrested by like, F.B.I. People, because, he is like a terrist, and he deserves it.

I like your revised chapter Krass :). Will you be revising the others too?

i normally hate conversion bearues stories, but this is an exception

My OC is called Sunny Smiles Shit and he has the same cutie mark I CLAIM RIGHTS naw i'm kidding but i made him first :)

114768
This fic has been around since may.

I doubt your claim very much.

Wow. That punches me like a fist in the face. Nice!

(meanwhile in the break room....) a small portal pops open and a creature comes out...
.

115084

I wanted to show that just because John is nice as is his area, the world isn't all cookies and gumdrops and sugar. The HLF is serious shit, and not to be ttaken lightly. I personally think of a majority of their operatives as SS. People that are mo of monsters than humans.

Personally, if you had to ask, my world isn't too different from yours. Unemployment is up (no thanks to John), People are starving, The world is just beging to die from pollution. Unfortantly, its a world that will be hardly explored. DUe to John's OBSCENE wealth, and the fact that the ponies have been about ffor 10 years, so humans are scarce and most of the pollution is now gone. There are less then 100,000 humans before pt 12. So the likely hood of other humans beingg invovled are minimal.

The world was shit when the ponies came and I hope to explore this in John's BG story lost chapter. If I ever get to write it. So I jumped at the oppertunity to through some of it in.

Also, exactly what punched you in the face?

I was not expecting the end of chapter 7. When I read Isaac Hamilton I nearly cried from the memories. Flawless integration good sir.

116549

Funny you mention that.

You see, An Azure Future was inpired by Last Man Standing, and I just HAD to throw Isaac in. It was not til the ReWrite that LMS had the same scene. Infact, PER was not in LMS either before the rewrite.

I actually posted a link to a .pdf formatted for ebook readers on LMS.

114771 My character has been in development since january i doubt your claim very much but anyway you didn't use the sunny smiles character in a huge role so it cool
P.S The first person to patent it owns it

119666

Hey! Another brony who's been around since Jan! Nice!

Besides, there are only so many names. I actually think Anonsi wrote that character in YtS 3. I just kept it.

119693 Yeah man i fell in love with the show following it since season 1

Will candy or Persephone be in future chapters as a love interest for John?

133159

I've THOUGHT about it.

Thing is AAF revolves around John getting ponified for Azure. Only reason Azure has a LI is for plot advancement. I could throw a teeny hint at John oin steady with one or the other (if one its Persephone). But AAF ends with the epilouge. If I write anything after I finish the epilouge, it will be in the time that was in between the various parts.

Sorry, but I doubt I myself am going to write John hooking up with anyone new.

Now I feel bad for not finishing More.

Goddammit, Krass, now I might have to go back and actually write the damned thing.

Yay, one of my favourite TCB stories is drawing to a close... oh wait Nooooo, it's finally over :raritydespair:.

Great chapter Krass, I always liked to think Gray was ok, not perfect but an ok kind of guy when he's not riled up about Humies. Also I love Lamb of God and that Look a Distraction joke made me chuckle. Though I'm sure I've heard it before somewhere :trixieshiftleft:. So I see John has made his deal with the Devil out of love n all that other good stuff. Good on him, shame the Bureaus closed and forced him to do it this way but it was also a clever way to get him and Gray together nice one :raritywink:.

Please sir, may I have some more.:applecry:

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