• Member Since 5th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Last Monday

Nom_deCheval


Does this look infected to you?

T

A bad day and a rainy night. It’s enough to drive a mare to drink. Winding up in a dark bar on the streets of Canterlot, Rainbow Dash finds herself meeting up with a mare who is elegant, graceful, and totally gorgeous. All the qualities that Dash thinks she completely lacks. What the heck could they have in common?

On this particular night, far more than she might realize.

A collaborative effort between myself and TheLandgrave, told from two perspectives.

To see Fleur's side, click here.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 58 )

A Fleur shipfic? Insta-watch, and will read as soon as possible! :D

5193434
I absolutely despise that name.

5193477

Don't dis Lee...

**snerk** :rainbowlaugh:

I'm so sorry... :heart:

5193495
Well... if you're going to start brining puns into it, I'm gonna have to Dash.:trixieshiftleft:

5193515

Well, make a 'bow and take your exit.

The puns rain supreme. :rainbowhuh:

Great to see more from you. Very nice opening, here. You got Dash down well.

not bad, not what I was expecting, but not bad at all *claps*

This was better than I though! Upvote!

An interesting Ship, one that I haven't seen before. Crosses my OTP, but who cares? Up voted.

Thanks everyone for the kind words!

And I am confused. Everyone go read the other version! It's the same story, but very different. It's well worth your time, IMHO.

Curious, though.... 5195420 5195420 5195027

You guys basically all had the "not what I expected" response. What was it you were expecting? Just curious. VERY glad you guys liked it.

:pinkiehappy:

5198680 I was expecting for it to go more along the lines of Flur showing Rainbow that she was indeed beautiful and attractive despite what she thought. Also I was not expecting them to end up having sex.

You know , this was , pardon the pun , beautiful.
I don't know how or why , but this pairing works. And it works well.
Truth be told , I would kind of like to see it explored further , even if Fleur thinks that it can't work. Rainbow is stunborn after all.
I think a tale about their struggle with both worlds while they try to have a relationship would make a rather fine story in it's own right.

Oh well... the bottom line of my rambling is that I enjoyed this a lot. :twilightblush:

I don't know, maybe it was just because I wasn't really expecting a FleurDash shipping here, but I just felt it detracted from what I felt was going to be the story. Don't get me wrong: what you have is beautiful in its own right, but I went into the story expecting something different to what you intended, and I'm kind of disappointed as a result.

It's a cool ship, but this story didn't do it for me, I guess. I was more interested in seeing how Rainbow Dash compared herself to Fleur, and the story took a turn I was not aniticipating.

Regardless, have an upvote for excellent characterization. :twilightsmile:

Good opening. Interested to see where you take this.

Helpful note: White mares you run across on stormy nights are almost certainly kelpies trying to eat you! :pinkiegasp:

STAB THEM IN THE FACE BEFORE THEY GIT YA!! :pinkiecrazy:

5199274 Good to know...

*whisper* Guards! Guards! Over here!

:pinkiehappy:

I haven't even read the description just looked at tags and photo and name and then freaked because strangest ship I have ever thought possibil

jz1

Am I the only one who thinks that there should be more to this?

Kind of a sad ending. Very tragic for Fleur in any case.

Great little short. Maybe someone will continue the tale and lead it to a happy ending.

5202116 Read the Fleur POV. It's not as sad as you think. (A little, yes, but not as bad as it seems in this version.)

:pinkiehappy:

5198680 I wasn't expecting the sex, even implicit as it was. just like... more like...they talk and compare each other concepts of beauty... kind of... I wasn't mean to be disrespecfull or something.

5202129

OOOO. Didn't see the link at the bottom. CLICKITY!

5202207 Oh, I didn't take it as disrespectful at all! I apologize if I gave that impression. It takes a HECK of a lot more than that to offend me. :twilightsmile:

I will say that the story is tagged with the Sex tag as a warning, but I'm sorry if that part bothered you. I assure you we tried to keep it as subdued and subtle as possible.

:pinkiehappy:

5202387 I didn't bother me, not at all. It was a good surprise!:twilightblush: Usually I only check if the story is completed or not, the tags... well... I tend to ignore them (most of the time),:twilightoops: if the summary get my attention, then I read it!:rainbowkiss: that gets me in a lot o trouble from time to time... :twilightsheepish:

Brilliant. Simply brilliant. I enjoyed this story so much - the 1940s vibe of Canterlot and the way you characterized Rainbow Dash with a perfect balance of bombast and kindness. Thank you for writing it and sharing it with all of us!

Either that or happy ending sequel

...Wow... Just...Damn, man. I really don't know what else to say.

aCB

I really enjoyed this. Dash's narration was spot on for her personality, and the whole story progressed really well and had an interesting ending. Not to mention it was a ship I've never seen before, so tons of bonus points for that. I was kind of concerned that the tone would change between the two authors, but that was unwarranted. Great story!

Oh wow.

Haven't read something like this in awhile! This is amazing!

~Skeeter The Lurker

Astonishing. Absolutely astonishing.

I'd honestly love to see what you two do with this ship beyond this.

~Skeeter The Lurker

5204539
Hotels that don't require credit cards:raritywink:

5204584

You have my interest.

~Skeeter The Lurker

You guys absolutely nailed this on every count. Both RD and Fleur felt spot-on to their characters; especially so of Fleur, who barely got any screen time to begin with.

Truly, this begs for a sequel of some kind. It's that well-done! Perhaps RD manages to get Fleur to Ponyville for a weekend, and we see how it goes from their unique POVs.

Thank you, everyone, for such kind words.

It is rather humbling.

:pinkiehappy:

Is there a story behind Rarity trying to set Rainbow up on a date with a noble?

5216162 Nothing beyond her generously trying to get her friend a date. It's also the impetus as to why Rainbow is on a date in Canterlot.

:pinkiehappy:

5216509 I can sorta see Rarity simply trying to be generous without thinking through the whole scenario. I guess I have simply read too many stories where Rarity is a better matchmaker than trying to pair the super athletic Rainbow with any noble.

I am not trying to criticize the story, I just thought that there was potential for a story exploring why no stallions in Ponyville would be available. Is there some sort of quasi-conspiracy in Ponyville that makes all the stallions avoid her?

From the way the stories are written, it sounds like none of the stallions in Ponyville are even remotely interested in her, which could be explored in another story. Keep in mind that I may be seeing things that are not there.

This has Just the right amount of sweet and sad, and the dual-perspective really came off well. :twilightsmile:

Side note: I had a good laugh noticing your individual bio lines:
TheLandgrave: To Infect and Corrupt
Nom_deCheval: Does this look infected to you?

Better get that looked at! :rainbowlaugh:

I liked this story. Made it seem as if Rainbow wasn't really interested in mares to begin with, but I guess she did come around. Makes me feel that Rarity didn't do her job as a friend for Dash though. She should have done better research on the stallion she was setting Rainbow up with.

In other news, Fancy is royally screwed if Rarity finds out about his cheating ways. She cares are friends and has the knowledge to probably do some heavy character assassination.

5202477
I have read a lot of crap because the description and premise looked good.

New ship accepted! :D that was a fun read.

5222516 I know, happened to me too, many times...:ajsleepy:

5227974
Did you try to advise the author on how to make it better? Or at least what to improve if they come up with another story idea?

Not bad, I'm interested.

5231431 I don't think so, I didn't find anything I can help with; I like the story and the ship was unexpected but not bad. Also I don't mind to read sex stories, even implicit ones. So I don't know what to say to him for improve this story... I'm not an expert!
Or you were talking about the others stories??

5234121
I was talking about other stories. I personally enjoyed this one but felt there is more to be told.

5234905 Sometimes, when I can find the right words.
About this one: you think so?

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