• Member Since 17th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

DannyJ


I'm just here to write.


Comments ( 27 )

This ties in to the comic book, doesn't it?

Very interesting. I like all the hints dropped about other stories.

5209910

Indeed it does! I've always loved the idea that Discord was not an entirely Earth-bound creature, and that he did have adventures in time or in outer space or in alternative universes. It's been my personal headcanon for a while, and it's also one of my favourite things about the backstory of Discord in your Last Draconequus series as well. To see it confirmed by the comics put me in such a good mood, and I started writing this almost the day after.

The setting you've generated is too interesting to remain only a single one-shot chapter! :pinkiegasp:
Please tell me you'll use it again at some point :fluttershysad:

5210041

As a matter of fact, this is the third story of mine set in this particular universe, as this is the same Discord from House of Chaos and End of Empires. We'll be revisiting it again soon for my next story, Just Dodge!, which will be out as soon as the artist I commissioned gets the cover art for it done.

Hmm... I would like to see this evolve into a larger story.

As it stands, it is rather interesting. The dialouge was done well, with just enough hints to allow us at least a minimal image of what was going on. It seemed like Discord was kinda off to me, though, but I think that's simply because there are no descriptions of his doing anything. I kinda just imagined him floating around doing nothing without the description to accompany, and so it leaves a weird image of him.

Still, very nice.

5210088
I'll go read them then

5210093

It probably is an ill-fit to try to use this format with a character such as Discord. That was one of my major worries about the fic, and why I know it's not my best. My rationalisation was that an encounter with an outer god would be one of the few things that would make Discord hold still and have a serious conversation without his usual level of movement. However, without narration, I can't really portray that. And if I were to have had narration, I'd have rather just had him still being his usual self rather than attempt to justify OOC behaviour. But then I wouldn't get to experiment with the format.

There was another story I once read called Ice, which was one of those fics I mentioned in the author's notes that used this format, and which also contained Discord. That story actually worked his general lack of animated movement into its premise, as in that story he was slowly freezing to death. It kind of compensated for the issue and made it less distracting. I'd recommend reading that story as a point of comparison, because I think it highlights the criticism you raised and shows how one would address it if their story premise allowed such a thing.

Pleasant conversation. 1221

5210142

Apologies for the long wait between responses. I don't often have enough free time to get on the site nearly as often as I would like.

I'll definitely take a look at that fic for a good comparison. Still, I do believe your concerns are valid in this case, mostly because I don't know the context that surrounds an outer god (mostly because this seems to take place in a universe I am unfamiliar with). Discord's apparent frustration with Orsim Desmenee would still, I believe, play out into his actions. Generally with pouting and or frustration/disdain based on the conversation they were having. Even when upset he seems to be very expressive, at least from my interpretation of him.

Still, again, the fic was overall entertaining, if a mite confusing for lack of context. It almost seems to be a spin-off of something larger. (And if it is, then my apologies for not recognizing it). Am I sensing a larger universe in the making or a universe that I might be able to read somewhere? If it is already in one of your existing fictions, then my excuse (and a poor one at that) is that I haven't really gotten around to reading a lot of the rest of your stuff yet. ::twilightblush:

5210142

Having finished reading Ice, I can say that I think that story had another advantage in that it had more room to display the characters' actions through their dialogue than yours did. It's a little harder to do the same with yours, since I get the impression that neither of the two deities were interacting in any physical way. And with space allowing 3D movement, it'd be a little more difficult to describe the movements relative to anything other than each other even if you were using narrative.

Besides his story, however, I can't think of any other story in which it could be done effectively without some really contrived circumstances that would definitely feel forced. Even with Ice, there wasn't a whole lot in the way of explanation, so the story definitely felt more like an experiment than a true story, even if just barely.

Apologies if any of the above seems oddly worded/explained. It's late at night here, so I may not be fully functioning. I'll try to get to reading your other stories (starting with The Winter sometime tomorrow or so). Can't wait to see more from you!

5221193
5221264

I certainly would've much preferred to have portrayed Discord with his usual expressiveness. The "outer gods are srs bsns" explanation isn't one I'd have ever wanted to actually use, because you're completely right that Discord would still be Discord, even in a situation where he's frustrated like this. And I think you're right that the 3D movement thing may have also contributed. It may have been to my advantage to have this story set somewhere other than just empty space. Perhaps on a passing asteroid, or near some other kind of cosmic debris?

As to the larger universe question, you would be correct! Currently, the project I refer to as "the Borderworld" encompasses Discord: House of Chaos, Discord: End of Empires, this fic, The Winter, and I've got another fic complete and waiting to be published called Just Dodge! which also shares this setting. However, these are still the beginning stages of the project, and at the moment don't have much relation to each other, so they won't lend much context to this encounter yet. If the Borderworld is the Marvel Cinematic Universe, then these are all the phase one movies, and I haven't yet written my Avengers. When I'm done, though, it'll be much larger, and we'll have a much more complete picture.

For now, I'll just say that this world's Discord has a long history, and that the beings like Orsim with whom he shares that history are many.

5209952 can you send me a link to the orgins story (also i think you tied a bit of mythology into it) if there is one, i'm interested.

5343546

The origin story for this version of Discord has not yet been written, but if you want more backstory on him in general, I'd direct you to this group.

" "Ever since that whole business squabbling over the Key to Time, me and my counterpart decided it was pointless to try to throw reality into total chaos or order. Neither of us could ever be allowed to permanently win anyway, because if we did tip the scales of our cosmic balancing act, Harmony would just tip it back. "

Discord was the Black Guardian?!

Hmmm...

He better stay away from Dr. Whooves then because the Doc will not be pleased with Discord.

5351976

Yes, Discord is this universe's Black Guardian of Time. Among other things.

5351976 What's the Black Guardian?

Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.

5619379

The Black Guardian of Time was the villain of a season long arc in the Tom Baker era of classic Doctor Who. An extremely powerful being capable of minor reality-warping, he represented the forces of evil and chaos in the universe and sought the Key to Time for his own nefarious ends, and was opposed by the benevolent White Guardian of Time, his opposite counterpart representing order, who recruited the Fourth Doctor to gather the pieces of the Key before the Black Guardian could. You can basically think of him as the Discord of the Doctor Who universe, only without the sense of humour and the "chaos" part being less important than the "evil". Hence the reference in this story.

5619382

Not an option until I get my other story out of the queue, I'm afraid, as per EqD's current policy on new submissions.

I... I somehow didn't even notice this was entirely dialogue while reading. You made it seamless. Or maybe I am just too tired right now... Either or.

Really good worldbuilding, I like the glimpse you give us into a much greater universe.

"Ever since that whole business squabbling over the Key to Time, me and my counterpart decided it was pointless to try to throw reality into total chaos or order.

I see what you did there.

This is great.

And the voices are distinct enough that it was no problem figuring out who said who, so that went just fine. I like the hinting approach, sometimes those are simply enough. Fun.

Key of time referance. Where's my scarf...

Certainly interesting, especially since it gives a good sense of the relative power levels of Outer Gods, Discord, the Elements, and Celestia. I'm going to have to look into this Borderworld thing...

I just got back from one planet where I dropped a frozen sandwich from orbit on a primitive tribal culture, and then I watched as they created a religion around it! Eventually, they formed into a more rational and enlightened society and started questioning the divine nature of the sandwich, rather than burning each other for heresy. And that's when I animated the sandwich to make it come alive and give a prophesy of great doom and the evils of technology! You should've seen it! Eight hundred years of social progress rolled back in a single night! Hahaha!"

I just about died laughing when I read that.:rainbowlaugh:

Interesting stuff; I like me some world-building, and this has gallons of the stuff. Maybe a bit too much for a short one-shot, really. I think I appreciated this the more for having read the CMC/Discord IDW comic.

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