• Member Since 23rd May, 2013
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

dirty little secret


I tried so far... and got so hard... but in the end, it didn't even matter at all. (Patreon)

Comments ( 134 )

She clenched my back with her forelegs as she laid there, staring into my eyes.

upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/85/Points_of_a_horse.jpg

Ponies don't have forelegs.

4129179
That is not universially agreed
th01.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2011/159/f/c/study__horse__outside_foreleg_by_journytorevenge-d3idnmq.png
And besides, I already overused 'hooves' in that section. I'm sure as hell not going to say 'arms', so what else would you have me do?

i realy look forward to this!:rainbowlaugh:

4129190 Replace their front limbs with tentacles.

4129207
Good. Because each chapter is better than the one before! :trollestia:

4129216
:duck:
I'll save that for my next clopfic.

4129311

*Squee* :rainbowkiss:

Outside of disliking the 'foreleg' thing, it was a nice chapter, I gotta say.

Sex and a slight amount of plot. I know it is supposed to be shameless sex, but I like the portrayal of a prudish Cadance. So many other stories have her as a wild, sexual deviant.

Honestly, I feel kinda bad for Shining. Sure, the two love each other, but... well, yeah. Though, you can't force that kind of thing on others, so fantasies simply remain fantasies, even in the openness of love.

Sad fact of life... but, love isn't all about sex.




4129658

Seems Chrysalis is gonna make up for this in bloody spades. And I think Shining'll be pretty hungry for it.

Prudish Cadance is prudish.

Consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation :pinkiesick:
My body is ready.

4129445
Good.
Because this is the worst of the three. :rainbowkiss:

4129658
I know, right?
I like the way I was able to build a little bit of plot and relationship issues into a simple clopfic. :twilightsheepish:

4129841
I see my message is coming across clearly. :twilightsmile:

4131585
Indeed.
She's the goddess of love, not the goddess of sex.
:rainbowkiss: The goddess of sex comes in chapters 2 & 3!

4131613
Good, because this is where it gets more interesting!

Well, she's certainly methodical about it...

Looks like Shining is going to get the screwing he always wanted.

YES! Something Chrysalis Shining and with no invasion or dark plot to ruin it I HOPE!
Anyway, Shining Armor finally gets the girl.

Do I trust chrysalis? Not just yet:applejackunsure:.
Is she regaining my trust? Slowly:pinkiesmile:.
Will I love more of this clop? YOU CAN BET MY (:trollestia:and his:trollestia:) SHINY WHITE ASS I WILL:yay:!

i bet you will see what I did there.

4132570
4132813
She's in a very risky situation, surrounded by her enemies. Caution is prudent.

4133380
:moustache:

4133486
Nope, no darkness or invasion in this one! ^.^
I like to keep my clop and my adventure separate, thank you very much.

4134237
Even after writing it, I'm not sure I trust her. :trixieshiftright:

I'll need you hard again.” She looked back up at me, and a predatory green gleam ran through her cum-plastered amethyst eyes. “And I know just what will do the trick.

Is she gonna turn into Twilight? Oh god please tell me she's gonna turn into Twilight.

4135458
Hooza!
End it with a threesome! Dom SA and QC.

4136372
Nope, I'm saving the threesomes until the sequel... when Cadance finds out. :raritywink:

I know you wrote just clop. But damn, that description of sex as physically pleasurable while spiritually unsatisfying, both simultaneously... wow. And that line about the well-behaved dog... ouch.

4136597
Good, good. :twilightsmile:

It's not just clop, it's art!

I like this MORE! MUCH MUCH MORE!

4138169
More than chapter 1?
That's the intention. :raritywink:

Well, that was pretty good. Though this sequel... hmmmm. Maybe Cadence is finally gonna break some of her own barriers?

Bet Shining'd be more than happy if things go right in that story!

And now I will rage about the Twilight thing. I would have agreed if he had a thing for Luna, Spitfire or even a batpony.

Anyway, will want to see where the drama goes now.

Comment posted by Burnasius deleted Mar 26th, 2014

4138236
Oh yes. ^.^
Hm... though I may need to throw in another complicating factor.

I think in the last chapter of that one, I may have Shining, Cadance, and Twi-form Crysalis be in the middle of a hawt three-way... and the the real Twilight walks in on them. :twilightoops:
Twilight will assume that's 'future Twilight' there with them and freak out... then Cryssy transforms back to her true self... and Twilight freaks out more.
Heh, and then a sequel to that one, where Twilight gets involved for real. ^.^

4138292
Meh, the Shining & Twilight thing is pretty deep in the fanon, and I find it pretty sexy in a naughty kind of way. (Maybe it's because I don't have a sister?)
At any rate, it's not real incest, because she's not really his sister, now is it?

This was pretty awesome!

4138372
Not bad for being written and edited all in one day. :twilightsmile:

4138380 That is extremly impressive!

4138361
Implied incest. Anyway, I shall agree with the ideas of you two sequels and may cause Shining to marry Chrysalis as wel.

4138361

Sounds like some good humor.

"AHH! FUTURE ME IS WITH MY BROTHER AND FOALSITTER?!"

*Chrysalis changes back.*

"AHH! QUEEN CHRYSALIS IS WITH MY BROTHER AND FOALSITTER!?!?"

*Twilight foams at the mouth as her brain snaps, collapses.*

4138461
Indeed. That's going to be a fun scene. :rainbowkiss:
I think I might get in the habit of ending clopfics with a little touch of humor.

4138488

I absolutely adore humor, believe me. It is nothing but good times all around.

All three of them gather around Twilight, trying to rouse her out of her unconscious state. Chrysalis suggests Shining do something 'special'. Cadence inquires. Awkward silence. Shining resorts to picking Twilight up and shaking her off, doesn't work.

Chrysalis turns into Shining with a devious grin. Shining knows. He knoooows.

Commence supreme awkward as Twilight wakes up to penis in face.

Then more awkward as she goes unconscious again. Cadence bats Chrysalis on the back of the head, saying she knew it wouldn't work.

Start on newer, stranger methods to wake the alicorn up, likely all of them being sexual in some manner or another.

Oh man this was awesome! Short but to the point and hot as hell of course, but it did left me wondering if SA could actually fuck Chrysalys in her real form, maybe something for the sequel?

Talking about the sequel, Could you please let us know about it via a new chapter? Much more easy to spot.

Cadance finds out about Shining Armor's activities with Chrysalis... and she wants in on it.

Well, I always said these two are sex freaks (under the right circumstances.):pinkiecrazy:

This was very well done, especially for a story that claims to be clop for clop's sake. While it's true that there's not much in the way of plot, you manage to make the sex feel like it's working for the story rather than the other way around. Each encounter feels like it's building the tale, from the unimaginative sex with Cadance at the beginning giving thoughts of how their marriage bed has been all this time, the thoughts and feelings of Shining as he tries to reconcile his deep love for her, with his lack of enjoyment during sex. This all moves the story along and fleshes it out without spending a single scene giving that exposition. It feels natural and works in a wonderful way.

The sensual scenes are well detailed and filled with emotion that comes directly across to the reader. The monotony of the first scene is just as powerful as the taboo and animalistic need of the last, which speaks very highly to your skill as an author.

I'll be looking forward to your sequel(s), and I endorse both ideas expressed here: 4138361 :twilightblush:

Nice^^ im looking forward to the sequells

Well.... I would have loved to see how Twilight would have reacted to this...

Can't wait to see what else she has in store for the stallion:pinkiehappy:

Have your 200'th like author! :yay:

4138584
Well, I don't think I'll do anything that extreme...

4138624
Well, non-story chapter updates are illegal by site rules. :applejackunsure:
We've got a fancy new sequel-marking system, though, and that should notify you. I'll make a story-tagged blog post as well.

4138863
Nah, I'll keep Cadance as much in the personality I created for her as I can.

4138998
I try. :twilightsmile:
It's good to see that being appreciated!

4140622
Me too, me too.
Don't hold your breath too much, though. I think I'll work on finishing my mane 6 series as the higher priority.

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