I Know You Saved Me
It felt like forever. Yes, forever, since the moment he passed.
Do you trust me?
It didn’t take the doctors more than an hour to tell me you were gone.
One day you think ‘Oh, everything is great!’ And then BAM! Life smacks you upside the face.
I’ve been waiting for two whole days for somepony to wake me up. Waiting for somepony to shake me, tell me that I needed to start my mail route. Waiting to get up and be excited to see you again.
...But I won’t have you back.
Twilight couldn’t wait longer than a couple days. She wanted to give you the proper rest, because that’s what a Princess would do, especially for a hero, one that even I will always consider to the hero of my life.
Twilight had stood before the crowd, the absolutely enormous crowd, and she spoke volumes. She told us about the best assistant in all of Equestria, and the best friend she ever had. And now that assistant and friend would never be replaced. I think she’s wrong though. She’ll probably find a new assistant some day, but I do agree that she’ll never have her number one assistant again. That’s what a Princess would do. And that’s what you would want.
Maybe I'm the stupid one here for thinking things could just be easy and happy like they’ve been. Yeah… that’s probably it.
No, Spike. You were never stupid.
You were the best. You visited Dinky when she was sick, and you did more than you ever knew to cheer me up when things were at their worst.
You made me fall in love. You made me fall in a love with an ‘obnoxious dragon’ that made me smile more than I ever thought I could. And then you showed me exactly how the world worked… and how amazing and fun it could be when you had somepony to share it with.
I mean, I’m not gonna force you to do anything. But, if you really wanna see the surprise, you’ll have to trust me. It’ll be worth it.
You said that to me all the time. You told me that I could trust you and that you could make me happy. I guess I am happy. I’m happy that I experienced life with you, even for a little bit.
Alright, on the count of three I’m gonna let go and you can look.
I trust you, Spike.
Okay. One…
I feel the flower in my mane, and you looking at me with your smile.
...two...
There’s a chimichanga on my plate, while I see you devouring a hayburger, and talking about root beer.
...three!
I’m in my favorite place, in your arms, and we’re on that giant building in Manehattan again. It was a place I’d never seen before.
It was the place that you kissed me for the first time.
Derpy opened her eyes.
It was nighttime now as she overlooked the city from her perch on that tall building. Ponies went about their lives down below, street lamps illuminating the soft haze that decorated the streets.
She looked off in the distance, waiting for Spike’s arms to wrap around her. Waiting to hear about his latest argument with Starlight or about some strange lesson he learned from Twilight.
But she didn’t feel his arms. She didn’t hear his voice.
All she could feel was the gusts of wind ruffling through her wings and mane. All she could hear were the distant shouts of ponies in the distance. But she could see something.
Through the lights and haze, she could make out a single star twinkling in the sky. It couldn’t have been easy for the light to make it through all the clouds and lights from below. But, it found a way.
She never really took time to notice the stars before. They were certainly beautiful.
...you don’t need me to see how awesome the world can be.
“You know what, Spike?”
It’s always been a beautiful place. We just helped each other to see it.
“You’re right.”
She reached into her mane and pulled out the small, yellow flower. It was dried out now, crinkled and broken. Being preserved in a book for a couple months will do that.
But she loved it all the same.
She planted a soft kiss on it before gently placing it back in her mane. A stray tear fell down her cheek as she gazed out at the horizon. At the far edge, she could see the sun barely peeking up in the distance.
“The world really is a beautiful place.”
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...Well, I Cried. Congratulations, Mate c: It's been a bloody cracking read and definitely something i'm gonna have friends take a look at. You broke my heart but i'm smiling all the same, Shame it's over...
On the one hand, good story. On the other, you're a monster. That tease was the worst. You got my hopes up and destroyed them. I understand the point you're trying to make, but was this the best place to do it? A hundred thousand words of a sweet love story and them BAM. It feels like I was lied to. Again, this isn't a bad story, but I feel that it's tonally inconsistent.
I'm all sad now.
Well, this is one I will think about for a long while. It has been a joy to read this story, thank you.
Edit: also. Ow! My hopes and dreams for them!
Holy crap...
Holy shit, that mood whiplash.
And now I am depressed
8917602
8917628
If you guys wanna know the reason for the story ending this way, check out the blog I posted in the A/N. It goes into a lot more detail than I could fit over here.
Long story short, though, a lot of times things happen that we can't control and they happen suddenly. If we can't control them, all we can do is grow from them.
...well that's a turnaround. Fantastic story, and a great journey. Rest in peace, Spike.
8917637
I read your blog. I'm not saying the ending was bad, I'm saying it didn't fit with the tone of the story.
8917599
Yeah, I'm actually sad it's over, too. It was a large part of my past year but I'm excited I was able to finish it, spread what I hope will be a positive message and move onto another project.
8917607
Same. But, they definitely learned a lot from each other.
8917640
Thank you so much.
8917647
I definitely appreciate your honesty and criticisms. I can always take something away to apply to future efforts.
Oh that was just mean
......I'm not crying! You're crying!!!
That was a great ending. The only thing I could say is I kinda wished there was a more developed reaction to Spike's passing. Like, how did Dinky react to it, how'd Rarity and Starlight react to it. I think Derpy's ending was beautiful, but she wasn't the only main character in this story.
8917665
I thought about having a longer, drawn-out scene for that, but there's a reason I didn't.
This entire story was told from Spike's perspective. The reader never knew anything he didn't know. So, when I bounced to Derpy's perspective, I wanted to keep it there and keep it as short and sweet as possible. That way, it kind of focused just on how she felt and what took away from it.
8917670
Alright. I can respect that, but maybe have a small scene where Derpy leaves her house to go to the place we find her in at the end of the story, and Dinky asks where she's going, and Derpy comforts her real quick. Spike essentially became Dinky's Dad, and I'm very intrigued as to how his passing affected her.
Congratulations, FLW. You've spun this tale, and I'm happy I came along for the ride. Yeah, my heart aches for Derpy after this ending, but that doesn't detract from my overall enjoyment of this fic. Thank you for putting your heart into this story. I look forward to seeing more from you.
...
...
SSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I'm still processing...
....I don't want to say anything mean to you.
8917686
You upset Spike died?
8917686
Don't worry, man. Feel free to let loose on me if you need. I anticipated this story making people hate me back in September of last year when I finalized the ending.
8917690
Any chance you could use the spoiler thing on this comment for me?
Very disappointed by the ending
8917720
I appreciate you being honest about it. Any particular reasoning so I can fix any flaws you found?
8917723
No it's just a really sad ending this was one of my favorite Spike stories and he dies at the end just makes me really sad
8917727
Oh yeah, I definitely understand that.
Like I mention in the blog I posted, it's based on some true experiences I've been dealing with and I wanted to send a message out to readers. Sometimes the ones we love leave us for whatever reason, but we can take the lessons they taught us with us wherever we go, and that keeps them around.
8917731
I understand I'm just not really into sad stories If I knew Spike was going to die at the end I never would of read it no offense
stuff like this actually makes me really depressed I don't do good with death especially since I lost my Grandpa almost two years ago.
8917735
I'm sorry to hear that. I totally respect your opinion. But I am grateful that you enjoyed the story up to this point and the support you gave me throughout.
And yeah, no offense taken. I've had people PM me and tell me to kill myself and that I should burn in hell because they didn't like my stories. I've heard it all.
8917731
I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings I really love your work. But the last two stories I really have gotten into this and Grief is the price we pay has had a main character die I'm almost afraid to get really into a story
8917739
Wow, those people need psychiatric help I would never ever tell anyone to kill themselves at the end of the day it's a story with fictional characters. I'm really sorry you had to deal with assholes like that
8917742
Oh no, you didn't hurt my feelings. No worries.
Not that I'm trying to promote myself here, but if you wanted a happier story that's kind of sweet and silly, you could try reading this one: Burn Out Our Innocence. It's very positive throughout and I use pretty much the same characterization of Spike.
Fuck. This went from one of my favourite happy go lucky, slice of life stories to a damn tragedy, the ending made me sad, but i guess that was to be expected, it was a great story nonetheless and your point is more than valid, I wish you all the best in life and hope that all your days are good ones
8917742
I read "Grief" as well. That story actually made me cry for real. Like, most times I'm just being a little dramatic to be funny ya know, but that story legit made me cry. Glad to see you've read it too.
8917748
Just to make sure This story is set in a alt verse correct?
8917759
In a way, yes. Like, I keep all the characters as show-accurate as possible, but it is set a few years in the future so outside of personalities I've developed and references to the show, it's not like current episode canon.
8917764
What I mean is in the future of that story Spike doesn't meet Derpy and die in the hospital it's a separate world from that story?
This is exactly the kind of ending I had hoped for, but it still hurts.
8917758
Grief is a story I've consistently thought about reading, but it's just so long and I'm a very busy guy out in the real world, so it's hard to commit to such a lengthy story. But, I might take the plunge since you guys seemed to enjoy it.
8917767
Oh yeah, it's totally a standalone story. No connection whatsoever.
8917768
I'm glad you liked it!
8917770
Oh yes. It's VERY worth it. I would consider it to be one of the best stories on this entire site. Not exaggerating. The emotion, the tension, the character development. It's a sight to behold.
8917772
Ok I'll check it out :)
8917215
Ehh, dragons would be fine, they can swim in lava. Everyone around the dragons, however...
Man. What a ride. Damn you for the ending though.
8917652
Okay, I hate to keep doing this but I really want to be clear about what my problems are. One of my biggest complaints is that after we've been subjected to all this sadness, it seems like things are looking up. Then he dies. If this hadn't been there, I don't think I would have been as upset. It's that rapid flip-flopping that's so jarring.
8917990
I respect that. I tried hinting at it a couple times by mentioning that it's not just the surgery, but the healing as well that's dangerous. But I probably could've done better with that. Once again, I thank you for your honest opinion.
Yeah...gonna need a pallet cleanser after that...but in the end he did spend the rest of his life with the one he loved. I think I am going to go hug my wife now.
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