Rainbro dash always has your back!

5744380 Aye! Well said.
Funny coincidence: I was considering putting in a reference to QWOP in this latest chapter. I thought it might be too obscure.

Clever Rainbow Dash is clever... And surprisingly tactfull and gentle ... then again , she know Fluttershy like no one.
Glad to see someone not writting Dash as an idiot.
Then again , this whole story is written cleverly so I am not surprised.

Yay, one more pony joins the pro-Flutterbelle party Figures Dash would already know, with her photographic flight recorder of a brain. I kind of wish Fluttershy had made her listen to more of the personal details though, because Dash would probably find it pretty hilarious that Fluttershy got molested by a child

"we're not trying to kiss the whole time, like last time" Way to spill the beans, Sweetie. And then the sad face. Poor Rarity just doesn't have any choice but to go along with whatever Sweetie and Fluttershy want.

Overall, this chapter feels pretty slow paced, but it is kind of nice just to have some calm conversations instead of any big drama. I wonder if Discord knows everything yet... Good thing Fluttershy is his best friend, so even if he does, it's more likely he'll be helpful than troublesome.

What ever happened to Rarity wanting to talk to Twilight about Spike? It's been a long time, and no further mention of it. Did it already happen, and just isn't included because it's not relevant enough to the main plot line?

5744456 Clever, gentle Dash felt good to write!
5744473 but I do miss seeing something like that that molestation joke. I have to remember that if ever Dash does find out.

Rarity hasn't been forsaken just yet, nor has Spike, even if this isn't their story. It may be a while yet before we see them together again, though.

Wait... do AJ and Pinkie... have they figured out that it's Sweetie and Flutters together? Also, I'm wondering about Rarity and Spike. You have dropped hints and clues that there may be something there, that maybe, deep inside Rarity, she may have some feelings towards Spike.

While I'm not that big into Sparity, I have full confidence that you would write it masterfully.

(Ok, I should have refreshed before posting... did not see this comment 5745162

wait,....this is the first time Fluttershy said, that they had really sex, not almost.
I am okay with Rainbows reaction, but i can´t help myself, but i think i might would have like her, to give Fluttershy a little speak, about her being carefull, or that they would talk about her craving for sex.

Wonderful chapter. I loved the Sweetie Belle and Rarity part simply hilarious!

5745226 Short answer, no. AJ and Pinkie still don't know the specifics, unless I retcon that in weirdly, maybe.

No worries about missing a post.

5745281 I suppose Rainbow has some reason for not wanting to know those details.

5747529 Thanks for reading, brony!

5747738 I think Pinkie probably already knows... she just has not said anything... cause Pinkie. As for AJ, I cannot imagine what her reaction will be. At least you're not writing a MacBloom fic... that stallion wouls split her in two on the first thrust!

5747762 Hopefully I would manage to pull off the Pinkie-already-knows cliche, if that's the case. Time will tell. I imagine, being a good big brother, if Apple Bloom wanted it, Big McIntosh would respect her pain tolerance, however that might happen. I can't get a good enough read on his personality from the show, though, to tell what kind of ponies he's into.

5747779 goin by the show, I would guess he'd want to wear Fluttershy like a condom. You saw his reaction when she shook her plot at him through the window lol

Maybe he prefers to carpet munch... one of those who prefer to use their tongue for everything. (Considering he's big enough to wreck a hydra, I suspect that only Celestia could handle all of him )

5747809 HydraMac OTP

5748109 that would be almost as bad as the pic of a guy fucking a T-Rex I posted on Facebook!

5748109 I'm surprised it has not yet been done...

5748443 It's got your pen name written on it, just waiting to be authored.

5748526 only way a HydraMac fic could be done would be as a trollfic... not my cup-o-coffee. (cause FUCK TEA) I could do the MacBloom one.

5749352 I can imagine every one of Mac's lines being said for him by Apple Bloom. It would be pretty funny to see her instruct herself during sex, actually.

5749492 lol Mac is able to say more than "eeyup" and "eenope" in my headcanon... actually, he seems pretty smart according to canon even.

I should start outlining a fic... I'm thinking this deserves to be more than a oneshot

5749509 I see no reason Apple Bloom couldn't use a little more literature detailing how she gets stuffed.

5749535 I don't think Cloudkicker would survive Big Mac plowing her...
Can he be gentle enough, or will he push her spine out her ear when he sticks it in?

5749509
Yeah, and especially when alone with a sibling like at the start of Applebuck Season, his shyness doesn't seem to be an issue. So with Apple Bloom, he should be able to talk plenty, unless she's seducing him and he's nervous.

5813508 She used "littler" because she likes the sound of it more. It holds more appeal to her than "younger" precisely because she prefers the childishness of it despite her skill with language, especially in Sweetie's company. Good note, in any case. I imagine I could divert some attention from their dialogue to explain that if you think it might help immersion. Thanks for the comment.

5820958 My shamelessness knows no bounds. I consider the Jesus of their religion to be as close as possible to the real world's, according to my understanding.

"And other sheep I have, which are not of this fold: them also I must bring, and they shall hear my voice; and there shall be one fold, and one shepherd." Kind Light 10:16

He'd be otherwordly to them, maybe from a place on the other side of some sort of portal similar to the EqG universe.

5837683 nedoblog.ru/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/yes-yes-good-good.jpg

5839603 I'm sorry to hear that. At least you're in good company, I think. Though I can't say I was ever severely abused as a kid, I find it helps me to remember as much when I'm down about that sort of thing.
5841991 Glad you're enjoying it. You've just reached the second hurdle for most readers at chapter 8 (the first being chapter 4). If you can still love and tolerate this story afterward, then I think you'll have made it past the most commonly controverted chapters.

I guess my affinity for romance knows no bounds.... Keep up the good work.

5843306 Thanks! I'm giving it my all, if only there weren't so much wonderful internet distraction in my way.

5902891 Thank you!

5964567 I think you're in for some feels here. Best of luck to you, good reader!

6021761 C.M. stands for Celestial Monarchy. It's closer to "A.D." but 21 C.M. more exactly equals 980-981 years prior to when this chapter takes place.

only one pony in that room fits this description

Are you calling Fluttershy a wannabe hoe or just making a jab at Rarity?

6020011 I understand it's not for every reader. Take what you will of it or not. I've yet to figure out whether there's a way to reconcile between Fluttershy's open Christianity here and fans' preconceptions about pony culture from the show.

I find it funny that there are fewer complaints about this story being about pedophilia than about it including Christianity. Arguably, Fluttershy in canon shows no sign of being into little fillies. She doesn't show any romantic attachment at all, really. The same is true of religion. Due to its absence, we can assume anything we want to, making Christianity part of their daily lives, or making Christianity completely foreign to Equestria.

6021775 Oh thanks. BTW I finally finished reading the story after like 12 hours. This is by far the longest story I have read on this site to date and it still incomplete. What are you doing? Writing a novel? But man my head was swimming when I read those two chapters about twilight teaching them stuff with the blackboard near the end there. I felt like I was in school again.

No. I'm saying that, just like you wrote, Fluttershy was like Plaithoof

One last thing. When can we expect the next chapter? Ballpark figure.

6022748 Probably about 3 weeks from the end of my slump.

6025699 I never saw any evidence that Christianity wasn't possible in show canon. There are earth-dwelling immortals in both Christianity and Equestria. John the Beloved was rumored to never have died but to have continued living among us to this day. I've heard some say that Cain is also immortal. In Isaiah, the earth and sun were even moved relative to each other by the word of a prophet. There's plenty of room to believe that the Christian world has influenced Equestria. Equestria's physical laws differ from our own, but that only creates less certainty about our worlds' similarities rather than prove we're not alike in religion. Maybe the issue is less what fans conceive as possible within the show and more what they conceive as possible in Christian canon. It's probably a combination of both.

Because of multiple issues I had whilst reading the story which I have detailed here, I am rejecting your story from submissions.

6040425 Thanks for the notice!

6211104 Oh, Merryweather, why?!

6241105 Frankly, reactions against the story despite the author's note at the beginning of the new chapter 8 and the good that Christianity does when practiced lovingly is exactly why good conscience won't allow me to remove it or de-Christ-ify the religion of this story's protagonist. I ought to, and will soon make a blog post about this, since it's been a vocal concern among readers ever since it was published.

6241834
I preface this comment with an acknowledgement that the comment section of a foalcon story really isn't the best platform for arguing the merits of religion. Also, this is very much an aside to the impact I feel it has on the story.

I expected you would stick to your guns in this, but your reasoning for why 'good conscience' doesn't allow you to do it makes no sense to me. Why does an objection despite a warning compel your conscience? Why does the actions of some of the religions practitioners irl compel it? For make no mistake, the religion is at its core almost entirely abhorrent. It is the people who do the good, and it is mostly in spite of some of its tenants as opposed to because of them. We can thank the goodness in people for the positive teachings that are presented and in focus in many modern congregations.

6244617 Your questions are well-stated and reasonable. I can't omit Christianity unless I want to deny my roots and the faith that has made me who I am, and which, I believe, can bring others the same peace and strength I feel. If I were to hide or deny what I believe can make others happy, I wouldn't deserve to be happy myself.

Because Christianity is generalized and hated unfairly by many, just like pedophilia, I can't be satisfied to leave them to be represented by somebody else. It has to be me, whether by my stories or other ways. Even if the negative stereotypes persist or even if my influence is negligible, only by doing my part can I be certain that they're represented the way I feel they ought to be.

I'm no holy person, mind. I do and write things that hurt what I consider my more noble causes, even, but, for work that I actually care about, I choose to be genuine or do no work at all. In most stories, things so personal to an author are left out, but that isn't the case in Fallen Angels. I'm presently convinced that I've not been misguided in making it such a personal work. I'd have never continued it this far if I hadn't been true to all of my passions.

I've almost regretted that I didn't decide to write the new chapter 8 long ago when I first thought of doing something similar, but, over all, I'm satisfied and glad that it was inserted later.

6246606
That makes more sense, thank you for bothering to elaborate. I still disagree mind, but your reasons and the background you describe makes me understand why you feel it must be included. I also respect an author who can explain why they stick to their guns on issues that are close to their heart.

Just be aware that, despite your convictions, bringing it in does color the rest of the story for new readers, and potentially muddy or distract from the main message of the story. Perhaps especially people like me whom actually know the religion yet do not hold the same opinion of it as you do, will be put off by the somewhat preachy and out of place chapter 8.

6246850 I'd be remiss if I didn't understand and weren't willing to explain my convictions. The warning note especially applies to the sermon given. Yes, it preaches, but I've tired hard to avoid any tone of condemnation outside of Fluttershy's own inner voice. I continue to be open to any suggestions that might help my effort while not changing the essential, underlying doctrinal information. Chapter 8 is much like the scenes in which Twilight explains the historic, anecdotal and empirical reality surrounding their situation, except that chapter 8 deals instead with the spiritual and religious facets (relatively briefly).

It serves more than just to polarize my readers, to annoy the irreligious and give food for thought to the unconvinced. It's a small part of an exposition on why pedophilia, faith, science, and friendship all might harmonize.

Thanks for your thoughtful comments!

Well Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie was really easy and AppleJack should be too. But what about the citizens of Ponyville? And you are just leaving the Sparity element hanging?

6255615 Sparity will likely be left hanging unless I do a spin-off. Nothing is set in stone yet, though. What Ponyville might think has yet to be seen, assuming they get that far.

6260650 Okay. Looking forward to reading next chapter.

6268571 I'm so close to continuing the story. I'm torn about whether to finish a side project first or not.

6268882 But I thought you have the side project "Flutterbelle's Beast" as completed? Oh You mean writing a Sparity side project. Whichever one is easier to finish, do it first. Then you can brainstorm for the other. I really hope you continue this one though. And i wish Spike could get out of the friendzone. It's sad in there.

Okay... I read through the entirety of this fic up to where you have left off. And I have to say... I don't think I've ever seen a ship fic quite like this one before. Like... I don't think I've seen a ship fic address issues of romance this thoroughly before. If anything it actually felt a little too heavily worded at some points. And I'm saying that when I'm a person who usually loves detailed and descriptive writing.

Don't get me wrong though. Even with me saying that it feels too heavily worded some times, it also seems justified in being that way. I can tell you have gone through a lot of work to address just how serious of a subject foal(child)-adult sexual relationships are.

I'm not sure I want to write a more in-depth critique right now. But for the moment, I want to say that I really like this fic, and please gimme more!

6279947 I'm really glad you've enjoyed it thus far. I'm looking forward to restarting work on it. It has been heavily worded at parts, though I think I don't have the confidence quite yet to trim it down. I might be able to during a final draft.