Skyrim guard travels the magical land of Equestria, making friends and foes, having adventures and lecturing about proper citizen behavior.

But how will our hero fare against the native ponies with such a short repertoire of phrases? Will he help the land or cause its downfall? Should we follow?

Of course we should!

***

Also, all comments saying anything about anything get a prize!

(In the process of being rewritten)

After his defeat in the Crystal Empire, Sombra is sent to Hell to suffer for his sins until the end of time. However, it turns out that his eternal punishment is not a lake of fire, but rather a combination of annoying neighbors, trivial work, and disgusting beer. Will Discord and Chrysalis be able to get the angry newcomer to loosen up and enjoy his eternity?

*AU: This story assumes that all major FiM villains, save for Nightmare Moon, died at the end of their respective episodes.

Cover image by Madmax (text added by DJ Indie Cred)

After the invention of radio, DJ-P0n3 (aka Vinyl Scratch) holds the first Equestrian talk show with her co-host Octavia. Octavia quickly finds out her superior is very eccentric, leading their broadcast to be constantly derailed, yet somehow remain popular. These episodes were recorded for historical significance and transcribed. These are the Vinyl Scratch Tapes.

[Update 1/25/13]: Fully updated to contain all of season 1 and 2, correcting a vast oversight on the part of the author. Sorry it took so long to update it fully on Fimfiction, guys.

Mort, also known as the Pale Pony (of Death), has been tasked to take time off from his rigorous duties of reaping souls. Seeking guidance, he is directed towards the town of Ponyville, to learn about the magic of friendship from Twilight Sparkle and her friends. All he needs to do is keep his true nature a secret. That shouldn't be too difficult...right?

Special thanks to Specter-Von-Baren and Pyrite Foolsgold for their help in proofreading and editing this story, as I really needed it. Additional thanks to Pilate, Chuckle5, Unimpressive Vagaries and Admiral Biscuit as well! Couldn't have done it without all their help!

Credit for the title card goes to Siansaar, AKA Carnifex.

For another excellent take on Mort, check out Sip's version!

Twilight doesn’t believe in curses but all that changes when her estranged uncle leaves in her possession the ancient slab of Akhal-Teke Ramses the Late. All seems normal until late that night when a ghostly figure demands the tablet’s return or suffer its curse.

Silver Spoon awoke one morning only to find that her parents had left without preparing her breakfast. Alone, with a strange voice lurking about and hungry, she must fend for herself. But in a world where an upper-middle class filly lacks sufficient cooking skills, there is only one food that can provide relief. Can Silver Spoon withstand the challenge of: Breakfast Cereal? Dig in to find out!

==Originally written Fall 2011== Equestria Daily Post==
After a long day of ruling Equestria, the Royal Sisters need a chance to unwind. Luna's solution is a few glasses of her once famous Moonshine, a drink distilled from moonlight. Celestia has been sober for a thousand years, but the temptation to have "just one" glass proves too great. Yet, when that one glass turns into several, it's Twilight who will have to deal with the princesses when they’re drunk off their flanks.

Pony Joe awakens before the dawn each morning, readies himself for his day, and then walks through Canterlot's cold and silent streets to his doughnut shop.

Life has become pretty mundane for Joe, but as he serves his customers and chats with his regulars he realizes that he has come to rely on that repetition...he relies on it to keep from remembering.

As a casual utterance by a new customer sends Joe into a spiral of haunting memories we learn about his life...and what he must give up if he wishes to move beyond his past.

The Lunar Rebellion sought to bring Nightmare Moon to power over Equestria, and for two long years, a war was fought for that very purpose. In the end, Nightmare Moon was defeated, but Celestia had become broken. She lost her faith in the ponies that once only knew love, and she walled herself inside her castle at Canterlot.

For five years, no pony had seen or heard from the goddess. In her absence, Equestria falls apart at the seams. Endless skirmishes are fought over petty land disputes. Love and tolerance are gone from the land. Ponies begin to revel in the art of war. When a dangerous threat emerges from the ashes of the Lunar Rebellion, all hope seems gone from the world. But some ponies aren't willing to let Equestria fall.

Four unlikely ponies step up to correct the mistakes of the past. In their quest to restore Equestria, they will learn that through the magic of friendship, all things are possible.

This story is presented as part of the Pony Fiction Writer's Month for September 2011. Enjoy.

In the many years after the Conversion Bureaus' shutdown, Twilight Sparkle is tasked by the Princesses with finding the last living human on Earth, Isaac Hamilton, and learning the story of his past. What she hears is a tale of loss, tragedy, joy, and the discovery of one's place in the world. But how much longer would that place last with what Twilight has to tell him?