At the heart of the enemy's stronghold! Surrounded by the enemy host! Outnumbered by hundreds to one!
Negotiatons breakdown! Diplomacy fails!
War!
War is declared!

Come at me, breezie.

Anon finds a hole in the wall of his apartment. When he looks through, he finds a bone-white changeling sleeping in the next room. Instead of calling the guards, he decides to strike up a conversation.

I regret nothing.

Sunset Shimmer and Equestria’s own Princess of Friendship Twilight Sparkle have spent hours, literally hours, researching earth baby intelligence and have come to some startling conclusions regarding human Flurry Heart.

Cover art cropped from a piece by Calli-pi-zho.

Once upon a time, ponies didn't use money. They didn't have it. They weren't even aware of the concept. They just traded goods and services, helping each other out and owing each other favors. They built big houses because they felt like it, ate grass because they could, and slept under the stars almost every night. Those were better times, simpler times.

Whatever happened to those times?

Well, one young pegasus mare has just concluded the most extensive research project of her life so far, and she believes she has found the source of the economic evolution that Equestria has gone through.

The answer lies in the gold.

Written as a birthday present for Carapace

Straight from the Canterlot archives, this collection of documents retells the rise and fall of Princess Twilight Sparkle, Enlightened Despot of Equestria, Defender of the Peace, Lawgiver, and Commander of Fort Libris.

Twilight Sparkle is, of course, known to historians as the first usurper to seek to schedule a coup d'etat by appointment. But for other details- such as, "What is the longest recorded time a pony has gone without sleep?", "Is it true what they say about swans?", and, "Why is there an owlbear in the Equestrian Witness Protection Program?"- these documents provide the answers and much, much more.

This is ABSOLUTELY SERIOUS HISTORY from primary sources. If anything makes you think this is silly, ludicrous, or unbelievable, blame Discord.

Written for FanOfMostEverything's Imposing Sovereigns writing contest.

EDIT 3-15-17: Wow, almost instant featured! Was NOT expecting that!

EDIT 4-8-2017: Featured in the Royal Canterlot Library! Thanks!

Part of the Remember Fort Libris print anthology, thanks to our Kickstarter supporters!

Perhaps there's more to immortality than we first thought. Perhaps it's not about living forever, but merely escaping Death's icy cold hooves.

And by staying one step ahead of him at all times.

They came suddenly and without warning. They wanted us to boop them. We must resist.

The art is by neuro if anyone was wondering.

Twilight knows Starlight Glimmer has been reformed under her guidance. Er, mostly—she’s still a work in progress, but there is no doubt Starlight is improving in her eyes.

However, there’s just one bad habit Twilight noticed that’s been nagging at her ever since she first saw it. But how would she converse about it? Should it be handled delicately? And when would she bring it up?

Today. Today, she would talk about it.

Equestria sure can be strange. Even downright absurd sometimes. Want some examples of silly ponies doing silly things? If so, you've come to the right place.

When I write a ridiculous story that's too short to stand on its own (or too inane), it goes here. This will be an ongoing series until I stop coming up with stupid ideas (which may not actually happen). I can't promise laughs, but I can promise silliness. Character tags will reflect the most-seen characters in the series, and may be subject to change.

For Filthy Rich, at long, long last, the end is neigh. He's finally ready to cast off the shackles of confinement, remove the bridle of repression, and run as far away from his captor Spoiled Rich as fast as his four legs will carry him.

Well, almost.