• Member Since 24th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen August 3rd

englishwitch


"If you write one story, it may be bad; if you write a hundred, you have the odds in your favor." - Edgar Rice Burroughs

E
Source

Filthy Rich lives up to his name. But he didn’t get rich and stay rich by wasting money on stuff he sees as unnecessary. So when his home accidentally burns down he doesn’t bother with a hotel, he simply asks a favour of the family his family have had a long standing business partnership with; the Apples.
So until the insurance is paid and the house rebuilt, Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom are sharing a bedroom.

Chapters (11)
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Comments ( 174 )

Oh dis gonna be good! :rainbowlaugh:

Interesting...

kinda reminds me of Farm Diamond.....

2241905 yeah but the thing is is that we're going to have to wait for more chapters to be able to figure out which is better. One may START out better but may suck by the end, though if EITHER of these sucks at the end I will be VERY surprised.
either way Im going to like the reads

2242147 never said it was a bad thing just an observation

Yay! Another DT and Applebloom fic. Lot of them coming in lately.

2242195 Diamond Tiara and Applebloom fics are currently the most popular. but for how long will they be?





applebloom's reaction to DT staying with her;:applecry:

2242298

Your basing this on what exactly?

Not even 2 hours I think and already a story pops up leaving me craving for more. Could use more southern, but it works great as is. Shame it stopped before their first day together ended.

Hi there.
I'm new to this site so I'm not sure what the etiquette is, but I enjoyed this chapter and would like to leave a note or two.
First of all, it's apparent that you have writing experience. I guess I can say this only as a reader--mainly because I didn't notice you as the author. This is a clean, transparent read, and I wasn't forced to stop at any point. So, as a reader, that works, yeah?

There were two things I noticed about your dialogue.
First, it's good. It's easy, it's appropriate, and it flows. So, once again, as a reader, I found myself not thinking about the dialogue but simply watching it as it unfolded. I was safely in the perspective.
But here's the other thing. You use a lot of beats between your spoken lines, and you tend to add description to your tags when, honestly, no description is needed. Things like "blurted out" and "muttered flatly" when you have already established the rhythm of the dialogue through appropriate beats ("she rolled her eyes") and preceding tension.
What I'm trying to say is that your dialogue is good--strong, even. It can stand on its own. If you remove or combine beats, and remove description from your tags, I think your dialogue would become even better. Snappy. Natural. Effective.

Take that with a grain of salt; I'm not much of a writer.

Misc stuff:
Some commas needed in dialogue.
...tone in her voice. "Saddle..."
...said slowly. "why..."
...first thing I asked." she muttered.
"...tootin." she piped to them all. "and..."
"...gone." Diamond Tiara muttered.

And finally, who in their right mind would trade an entire muffin for a bag of chips? Maybe if the chips side threw in some Warheads or a bit of their hot lunch, but anything less is highway robbery.

Ooh, I like this! I always love fics that explore the relationship between the Apple family and the Rich family. Noveau Rich as Stinkin' Rich's daughter is a lovely name. Can't wait to see how this goes!

“I gotta zap-apple muffin.” Apple Bloom held up a polychromatic baked good. “Still pretty fresh, only a day old.”
Scootaloo stuck her head into her bag. “Trade you for some potato chips.” She pulled out a large bag of haybacon flavoured chips.
“Done.” Apple Bloom tossed the muffin to Scootaloo and snatched the chips out of Scootaloo’s hoof.

Applebloom? Why would you trade your zap-apple muffin for plain old potato chips? That is like the worst deal you've ever made haha

Whelp, I'm hooked like a fish. I'll be kicking and screaming waiting patiently for more chapters.

Till then, Br0ny1Delta is out.

This is going to be fun.

I want to remind everyone again, there will be no romantic relationship developing between the two fillies.

I feel like this line was pointed directly at me, but I'm just as happy to see friendshipping as regular shipping. That is, if they ever become friends. If they just stop hating each other can we call it neutrashipping?

Somehow this is reminding me of the Tv Series "Common Law". Must be the friend-enemy relationship. Applebloom as Travis and DT as Wes.

Feels natural to me. Maybe they can learn to tolerate each other.

Is... is it wrong to have a sort of crush on Kicks O'Claire?

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I'd say the story is coming along nicely overall. It's understandable to think some parts have them bordering on hatred to each other, but that's only natural given the circumstances. They obviously don't want to have anything to do with each other and now they're thrust into a situation that forces them to spend the majority of their time together. So there's going to be a power struggle for some time before they manage to regain a semblance of normalcy in their lives.

Ponies argue and fight over weird things when they're tired and forced into a less than ideal situation, such as this one. So far, I'd say you're doing good, since at this point it's not clear if they will become friends, or just learn to tolerate each other long enough to survive the month.

The centrepiece was a large bowl of freshly steamed corn on the cob, dripping with butter, there was also corn-bread, carrot sticks, oat cakes and each place at the table had a bowl of fresh salad with lettuce, celery and tomatoes.

Dear God that sounds good. Now you made me hungry!

I think you are doing a good job. Apple Bloom normally has Scootaloo and Sweetie Bell as buffers for DT and SS's attitude and teasing, but with just the two of them forced to stay in close proximity I think the feelings of what they already think about each other are being brought to the front unfiltered and in their faces. I thought that after a while Apple bloom would border on hatred and DT would stay steadfast in her condescension to the point of disdain. I think you captured that fairly well; Apple Bloom does not want to put up with DT's "better than you" attitude and her putting down others worse off than herself and DT feels like the Apples are not worthy of herself or her family and wants to stay away from their more simplistic lifestyle and anypony that lives by it. Apple Bloom I feel would definitely take this situation much more personally and I could not see her and DT's relationship ever shifting paradigms to anything less antagonistic.

This is flowing nicely! The fight over the bed isn't hatred, it's fillies being fillies. I think their biggest problem is simply that they don't understand each other, and don't know why they value the things they value. And that goes both ways.

Sounds about perfect for dislike to me do not forget that Diamond is very spoiled and use to getting her way if her attitude in the show is anything to go by

Hatred would lead to violence not a slap fight over a bed like that

I love this story, please update soon! :twilightsmile:

looks like Rich ain't as snobish as canon and fanan has him being since it reads he can cook a old fashioned farm breakfast, not to metion getting up in time to do it. With this point I SO agree with DT, to early!! of course I'm one of those that thinks who ever thought up morning should have to deal with the blasted things and not be able to sleep in like you KNOW that they were able to

2308027

Agreed, anything before 8 am is too early for me.

2308027
I'm not sure about canon, we've seen so little of him.
The one time we saw the most of him, Family Appreciation Day (S02E12), he didn't bat an eyelid at Granny Smith's odd behaviour, even helped her slightly and made his daugther dress as a rabbit and sing to the water
Because of that alone my personal fandom puts him down as the kind of pony who enjoys the finer things in life but respects the Apple's and their ways, so he can enjoy being a part of their lifestyle.

2279684 all it needs is a slab of prime rib (medium rare) with au jus and creamy horseradish... Dangnammit, my gut's a gurglin now! and there's only one solution... TO THE FRIDGE!!!

I like the story, keep it up!

2308302>>2308027
when i had a job, i had to get up every morning at 0430. my shift started at 0700, and i had a 64 mile commute ahead of me.
I had about an hour to get dressed and gather my equipment (it was construction work, so a shower was pointless), and i was on the road by 0530. a quick stop for 2 cans of monster, a can of chew, and a donut if i was in the mood, and then it was onwards to hell on earth, disguised as a Hy-Vee getting remodeled.

HAHAHA! Ok, that ending reminded me so much of my sleep over at my cousin's house. only we'd refuse to go to bed and had a habit of always getting into arguments. Uncle was a stern and scary guy. When the man said BE QUIET, even the gecko's outside would shut up :rainbowlaugh:

Great follow-up!

I should end this story and read the next one tomorrow just because it ended so well :pinkiehappy:(also, I don't think they hate each other, AB and DT just have that whole alpha pride going :rainbowwild: and they just refuse to give in to the others' demand), but I just can't help myself! :twistnerd:

To new chapters and BEYOND! :scootangel:

moar!

Totally my favorite DT story. It really is shaping up marvelously. I really loved the way you did the Mopping Chore part and how DT ended up on the porch questioning all that happened, and the feeling of being treated like an clueless filly that can't pick up on how to mop a simple floor was touching. She really took pride in something she thought she actually had a grasp on. She was actually doing something new to her. To have that taken away so swiftly and feel looked down on, too untrustworthy, was really sweet.

Diamond Tiara being all sour mood because she wasn't given a chance to prove she could really get it done. Not that she wanted to work, but to be seen as unfit to do the work when it was only her first time ever seemed unfair to her, man I know that feeling...

This chapter actually topped the quality of the last one a fair bit. Love it!
And yes, people think that whole bed thing is cliche... but truthfully it is all too common an occurrence irl xD that scooting together thing during sleep is just natural. I would of loved to see DT's and AB's faces waking up to each other, both jumping back screaming top of their lungs while partially caught on their sheet and each fallen over the respective side of the bed lol

Anyways, good night/morning.

2308429 And acknowledges where his fortunes and heritage came from. I think he respects the relation his pappy and such had with the Apples, and he just grew up living by the examples set, while doing his best to further business and support those that's helped foster his business.

He's not perfect, and loves money, but I think he tries to set a good example for DT. When he can, and catches his cunning daughter when she misbehaves. S3 Babs really took her character a step back from that Foal Free Press episode in season two. But it was an anti-bully episode, so getting saddled as the stalker like bully (DT... going to a FARM willingly? That's stretching it. All other eps she just goes about her day, lest that episode they really did just do it to spy on their float. Possibly.)

We may be three chapters into the story, but I finally have a reason to use this picture

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Believable and not ooc so far I like it

Well them being friends wouldn't be realistic. Tolerating each other makes more sense as a end game.

This is a cute story. Very in character so far.

Im surprised they have never come to blows before, EVER

Diamond Tiara was tackled by a yellow and red blur.

MORTAL KOMBAT!!!:flutterrage:

To be fair, Apple Bloom is not a violent pony. If she physically assaults sompony then they probably deserve it. In this case I have to agree, the Apple family has been nothing but hospitable to DT and her father and she has all but spit it back in their faces when all they have asked in return is that she do a few chores that they would be doing themselves anyway under normal circumstances. While violence does not solve the problem, some people just need to get a good kick in the teeth.:raritywink:

What Cheerilee herself doesn't know: Diamond did try and help with something she thought she could do, and when it turned out she couldn't she was insulted for it (in her mind- let's not forget that it's not very likely Granny meant to insult her).

Having said that: How Diamond handled herself was still deplorable. I'm not yet sure how she should be dealt with, as I myself don't believe in most forms of punishment. It'll be interesting to see what Applejack thought up, and whether she's going to rise above her own bias concerning everything but rural culture...

Comment posted by BlackShadow94 deleted Mar 28th, 2013

Diamond tiara's cleaning lady huh? Was it this cleaning lady?

Just came to my mind. :pinkiecrazy:

Update soon! :twilightsmile:

As much as Diamond Tiara is being a massive brat in this chapter, she's also right. It was unreasonable of the Apples to expect Diamond Tiara to be able to keep up with the same sort of chores as Apple Bloom, or even to be awake and functional at the same time of the morning. Even if she'd gone into her chores with perfect optimism and cooperation, she still would have fallen asleep in class, and that's not her fault. I think the mistake Applejack made was in assigning Apple Bloom to shepherd Diamond Tiara about her chores - I think Big Macintosh or Applejack herself would have been more patient with her. I definitely think Apple Bloom should have been more sympathetic about Diamond Tiara losing her tiara, especially after her house has burned down.

... having said that, Apple Bloom is right about pretty much everything else, and Diamond Tiara definitely started that fight by insulting the Apple family.

I can see that the main conflict here revolves around AB and DT not being able to respect each other's lifestyles, so hopefully they'll be able to come to some kind of accord on that front. Very interested to see what happens next!

Sonya Bloom vs Johnny Tiara

FIGHT!

PONY KOMBAT!

Seriously though this was a great chapter. And OH MY AJ got *puts on glasses* SCHOOLED!
:yay:<yeeeeaaaahhhh!

No really, this chapter was short and full of great sparks. The adorableness and sponky little antics of Scoots, DT showing off her amazing drama skills, and AJ learning to think a bit more from the other perspective by putting her in a hypothetical situation was really well executed.

One filly gets a bloody nose, the other gets a blackeye. I really liked the chemistry between these two, the way DT non-chalantly continued to play on the swing while stabbing AB in the heart with those mean and unjust words only to end up getting tackled off the swing was lovely. And again, AJ's DOMINANCE goes unquestioned. I really like how you fit Cheerilee's very adaptive teaching methods.

Said it once before, but this is truly my favorite DT story and even AB story. Looking forward to what surprises AJ has in mind <3
Bravo!

2335168 I totally agree. Quite unreasonable. I guess the Apples just can't comprehend how somepony can go without basic knowledge like how to mop a floor. The rabbit chasing bit was a bit much for a morning chore before school. Let alone still having to be clean before going off to school. AJ needs to re-evaluate the chore lists imo.

On the other hoof though, as bratty as DT was, and yeah she started that fight, I don't think DT really meant half of what she said as much as she just wanted to make AB feel as bad for what she put her through that morning and being so mean about her tiara being lost in the mud. She clearly loved the breakfast, though she'd never admit that. Tsun~. But, I do think they are just too young and grown far too accustomed to one lifestyle that's hard for the other to really adapt, or see how a sudden change could affect the other.

AB seems to see DT as a burden that only messes things up. She sees her as mean and selfish. Nothing her and her family does for DT ever seems good enough for Diamond. I think AB does do her part to *try* and help out when she sees DT suffering... after the guilt sets in from watching her after a bit. But she just plum don't understand DT's way of life and how a filly can be so 'useless' at chore.

DT by comparison, and Cheerilee said it well, is too used to being given everything she wants. Pampered lifestyle and treated like a special little princess all the time. She could never have imagine that AB, or any sane filly, would be forced to wake up at the crack of dawn to slave away on a field doing chores while every other filly and colt, heck most adults too, still sleeping. DT feels even when she tries to learn and contribute that she is treated unfairly, not given a proper chance. Why would a filly want to help a family that looks down on her as a burden? Ain't no way she could be expected to know all that stuff on the first day.

Nice post. And I love that chemistry they have, they are the best not friends in ponyville! :rainbowwild:
DT really enjoys playing off AB since she knows she is so honest and easy to react to her teasing.

I like how DT can be sort of against the CMC yet if business is involved she is all boss. S2 Foal Free Press episode whatever it was called is still a great example of DT character growth. Shows she isn't all against blank flanks as long as they don't cross her ;P

2337922 They do have great chemistry here, yeah. And yes, I think DT was really just trying to provoke AB rather than actually having a huge problem with the Apples. She seems to accept Applejack as the "inevitable authority figure" that all adults are at this stage of life. Ultimately, it's hard to blame either of them for what's going on.

I especially loved Diamond Tiara's role in "Ponyville Confidential" too. I think she works really well as an effective, efficient leader who needs to learn some empathy and kindness, rather than just a petty bully out to cause conflict and misery for the sake of it. I also don't think she specifically dislikes blank-flanks - she just has a grudge against Apple Bloom, and it's the easiest way to get to her.

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