• Member Since 8th Sep, 2012
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

Lord Destrustor


I did things. Have a nice day.

Sequels1

T

How do you care for someone who can only try to harm you? How much do you let yourself change when all you want is for things to go back to the way they were? Where is the line between devotion and obsession? What do you do when your closest friend becomes a monster?

Spike doesn't know.
But he tries.


Now with a sequel.

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 62 )

Time for a completely serious review!
-A few characters are a bit OoC, in my opinion.
-Were the BOLD SCREAMS meant to have no punctuation at all or did you just not notice?
-The writing seems kind of awkward in places.
-maybe you should split this into smaller chapters; 18k words might be a bit intimidating.
-The "Fluttershy becomes a doctor" bit has been done a hundred times.
-Great job on kinda stealing a Stephen King concept.
-Here are a few of the grammatical errors I found that... Wait, I wrote that?!?
Oh... uhh... well then in that case THIS IS THE BESTEST STORY EVARRRR! LIKED, FAV'ED, UNFAV'ED, FAV'ED AGAIN, INB4 FEATURED! WHY IS THIS GUY NOT A BEST-SELLING PUBLISHED CELEBRITY YET!?!?!?

So I'm guessing this is based loosely off of the basic concept of the signal?

Sequel DAMN IT!
This was a great read and I DEMAND more :flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage:
Like and faved

1896051
I don't plan on writing any such thing, sorry.

1895772
I was thinking more about Stephen King's cell, actually.

1896736 Same difference

1896875
Yeah, if my quick google search showed me the one thing you were talking about, they are indeed very similar concepts. I had just never heard of it.

Well, that took awhile to read, I liked it, I really do, the only issue I have stems from my 'y-u-no-make-sequel' syndrome that I contracted after reading the comments. But if ya don't wanna make one that's fine. Either way it was really good, I'll even add it to my top 15.

Well came in here to say that the fic was an incredible read and that I couldn't wait to see where you went with it, so then came the obvious disappointment that it ended just as fast as it began. And Cell is a rather funny comparison considering that it had a really tantalizing end as well. There really aren't enough Spike fics that take themselves as serious as this one. :derpytongue2:

Still though, fascinating read

1897054
Wow, thanks for the top-list-ification.
The thing is, I do have an idea of how the conflict in the story would conclude, a reason and purpose for the signal. I could probably make a sequel and bring things to an end and some closure, but I just can't find myself wanting to do it. It would be an investment of time, talent and motivation in quantities such that I highly doubt I have.
Also it would probably turn into some huge adventure and be a somewhat radical departure from the current tone.
Also also, I'm actually not sure about the possible reveal; it just might be lame as heck. Unless someone heavily insists on taking the reins of this setting for an unofficial sequel, I'd rather leave it a mystery.

Fun fact: This was supposed to be set on the 83rd day, before I noticed that the number 83 looks like an emote of an astonishingly pleased kitten.
So I changed it at the last second.


83

I'll read this later, but for now: "How come I must know? Where obssesion needs to go?" You get a free Pinkie Pie if you know where that comes from.

1897122 Well, just do what you want to do I guess, I'm just glad it was written at all. Sides most stories would get a sequel after that ending, let's just say you're going against the tide and leave it at that.

Interesting read but why wasn't Rarity affected at all even though she's a unicorn?

Oh well. Even with no sequel it was still fantastic. Well done have a spike:moustache:

1899283
She lost her horn before it could affect her.
The signal can only get you if you have a horn, which is why only the unicorns were affected in the first place.

This needs a sequal. or at least an Epilouge. Great story. Very dark.

A good parody from "I'm the legend".

(SPOILERS IN THIS COMMENT)
This was a great fic, so much different emotions built up through it, ranging from interest, sadness, and hope, I guess.
And the level of darkness, whoa.

Too bad it ended that abruptly, now I'll be overthinking about what happens next, haha, do you have any plans on doing some followup to this, or do you want to leave it up to the reader?

Anyhow, lets do a structured praising here, heh:
Story
The story idea was really interesting. As a one-shot, it had the right amount of information given to the reader, and, the way you presented it (Spike´s "diary") added a really good touch to it all.
Eventhough, as it was just that, a one-shot, I wonder what everything was caused by, what happened to Canterlot, and if Twi and her (alive) friends will be able to pull through. Then again, with that ending, the last one doesn´t seem very probable.

You kept telling the story in such a way that it was easy to follow the characters, with all their reasons.
The moments with Spike trying to stay strong for Twilight, thinking back, were greatly written. And Twilight trying to ... well, be reassuring, or something, was really another greatly written piece. Then again, it all was. :twilightsmile:

Characters
Were the characters out of character as far as we know from the MLP:FIM universe? - Yes, I think, partly. But, with what they'd been through in this story, I´m not the one to blame them. I think you made the characters reactions 'realistic' assuming what had happened.
Applejacks turns in life, so dark, all because of the Unicorns, and they were doing it for some reason noone understood. Who can blame her for getting tired of it?
That's the only thing I really can say felt much out of character, all the others, Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie, Rainbow ... even Twilight and Spike were well written as themselves, heh. But again, with the events transpired here, hm :twilightoops:

Summary
Really interesting and wellwritten fic.


Liked, faved and watching you :twilightsmile:
M

1895337 Also, that comment :rainbowlaugh:
-----------
Oh, about that comment; I noticed some typos with stuff like uppercase/lowercase letters while reading, most found on the names "Twilight" and "Spike", would you like having them pointed out? :twilightblush: :facehoof:

----------
EDIT: Eh, I should have read the other comments before asking if you were going to continue, oh well, I'll let it be there ^^

2163405
Wow that was an awesome comment! Thank you!

Actually, about the sequel thing... I've been seriously considering it...

Unfortunately, my computer melted (Did you know there's a little 3 volt battery on the motherboard, and when it dies the entire hard drive is wiped clean? Operating system and all?:pinkiecrazy:) And any serious writing will have to wait until I don't have to share this one with my brother.

As for the typos; sure, why not? Shoot.

2165954 Heh, ehm, thanks, and you're welcome, or something alike :twilightblush:

Whoa, that kinda sucks with the computer-failure. The same battery almost died on my earlier computer, I kept getting warnings, but ignored them, until I was changing some hardware, then I changed that annoying battery too. Hm, I wonder if I spared myself some headache back then, oh well :twilightoops:

I did a quick search through and these are the typos with uppercase/lowercase letter on names I could find:
Lowercase 'twilight's:

“Uh… hello twilight…”
Spike, prompted by his own joy and twilight’s demand,

Lowercase 'spike's:

“Oh hi spike!”
With a final scream of terror, spike felt her head slam into his body, hard enough to send the unicorn’s mane flying in his face.
That one was much taller than spike,

Anyhow, good luck with solving the computer-problems :twilightsmile:
M

2166270
The punctuation should be fixed now, thanks.
And the computer thing isn't so bad. Aside from my stories (which I keep backed up on a flash drive), and a few hours of my ponymon save, there wasn't anything important in there.
I'll just go out and buy another one, hopefully something better than "a used dinosaur I bought for 75$"...

Oh, boy, here I go again.
2163405, 1901960, 1899602, 1897600
They say only fools never change their minds. They're wrong, and this is proof of that.

Wow thanks :rainbowwild:

Yes!

..Wait, that's not enough of a comment here. :facehoof:

It's really great seeing that you decided on giving this a continuation. I'll admit that I've come back here some times, and, even if not always rereading the entire fic, I've reread parts that I really like.

So, maybe, 'Yes!' feels like a fitting comment here. :twilightblush:

And, uh, I think I've broken FIMFiction. First I didn't get any notification about your reply. And second, well, every comment refresh adds more "replies" to your comment.

2585127
AAAAhhhh! That is one scary image.
Strangely, it doesn't do that on my end. In fact, my previous comment is displayed as having no replies at all. Maybe I'm the one who broke something?

This is the greatest day, of all time! Real happy right now. :pinkiehappy:

This totally reminds me of The Marker from the Dead Space series, which turn everyone into rampaging beasts, but in this case only Unicorns.

2590628
Soon, once I've whipped the writing elves to my satisfaction.
Their chubby little hands don't seem to pump out enough words when they aren't dripping with blood.

Oh look, I seem to be in a strange mood today.

I guess I'll edit a link somewhere when I decide to throw it out to you ravenous wolves.

Awesome story! I shall be following! :rainbowwild:

At first when you introduced Rarity into the story I was mildly confused, maybe you should have mentioned something about her horn in the beginning? Other than that, very well written. :D

2907813
Yeah I kinda tried to make it a somewhat mysterious plot point, but I may have strayed too far and into outright nebulous territory.
Hmm...

Comment posted by Butterwings deleted May 4th, 2014

2165954 Well my old computer, the fan heated up [Yeah.] and broke the processor thingy..


COMPUTERS, Y U SO EASY TO BREAK?!

although grains of wet sand still clung to their hooves and feet.

Doesn't dragons have paws?

4336543
I'd have to really research it, but I assume since he's clearly plantigrade (meaning he walks on the soles and heels of his feet (like us)), that those are indeed feet.

He really should've set Applejackass on fire.

I Can't Sleep.
Help me.

4479304 huh. Applejackass. Never heard that one before.
I like it.

4759138 okay!

*Knocks Clay out*

2163405

I haven't read the sequel to this yet, but I actually have a hunch as to the source of the Signal:

POSSIBLE SPOILERS











I'm think that it has to do with Sombra, partly due to the crystal shards that all of the unicorns make, much like Sombra did. And I could see the nearly unthinking rage being in line with him after his defeat earlier. Of course, he didn't display any ability to mentally affect others over a wide area, so that would need to be addressed. Though we have seen a prior instance of a mass psychological effect: the Crystal Heart, given it seemed to lift up the crystal ponies spirits. If he somehow was able to get his hooves on it, corrupt it, and augment its range, that could possibly do it.

All that could answer the Who and How of the situation, but I'd be a bit fuzzier on the Why (aside from just wanting to screw everyone over). :applejackunsure:

4850525 Thanks for the boop. Your reply made me read this fic again. It's still great.

As I've read the sequel up to the most current chapter, I won't say anything regarding your theories. I'm terrible at not spoiling stuff, sorry.
Let's just say that the sequel is good as well.
:twilightsheepish:


That said, the scenes in this fic are powerful. By now I've seen enough MLP-related "high-octane nightmare fuel" pictures to add even more depth and imagery to Spike's nightmare. The end result; Friggin' disturbing.

Something that amazes me is when the unicorns try to overpower The Signal by sheer will. I mean, the heartfelt moment where Twilight actually manages several lines of speech, trying to show her gratefulness towards Spike, is great. It's pretty much my favorite scene in this fic, because it shows how strong the bond between Twi' and Spike is.

While I'm at it, saw some capitalization-thingies,
Fluttershy had to go in the everfree
Why in tartarus would she do that?
And a word too much,
With so fewer mouths to feed,

Can't add more likes nor fav'es, so, have another comment!
:twilightsmile:
M

Holy hay, that was disturbing. And I loved every second of it! I hope the sequel is just as intense/emotional as this one.

CCC

...chilling.

Comment posted by Glowing Ember deleted Oct 24th, 2014

Delightfully dark!
T (FN)

Eh. I think Applejack's got some kind of problem beyond the things that have happened if she's fallen so low as to murder them. Her behavior makes her seem really out of character. Her actions with regard to Twilight are more understandable.

Also, your story is terribly depressing.

P.S.
That bit there with Spike, Applejack, and Trixie made me wish Spike would sedate Applejack or maybe off her just to be sure she won't go around killing anypony else.

Comment posted by Glowing Ember deleted Oct 24th, 2014
Comment posted by Moonreaper666 deleted Dec 26th, 2014
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