Chapter Four: Last Time?
Both Sunsets sat opposite one another in the empty classroom. Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Twilight were all present as well. Side-by side, it was difficult to mistake one Sunset for the other; Sunset One looked calmer, more mature, and confident. New Sunset was unmistakably hounded and on-edge.
“So, I suppose that answers the question of where your human counterpart is,” Twilight said. “This answers quite a few questions I’ve had, actually. Inconsistencies, mostly. Rumours and stories of you acting out of character, that sort of thing.”
“She hid her tracks well enough.” Rarity examined Sunset's doppelganger. “I didn’t even realise myself… but looking back, yes, there were times when I felt something was just a bit… off.”
“The memory stone won't have helped either,” Sunset One said. She kept her distance, as if befriending a wild cat. “Who knows what memories were getting caught in the crossfire whilst Wallflower was using it.”
“Yeah, yeah, blame the memory thing,” New Sunset growled. “But come on; you didn’t think everyone went along with your existence a little too easily? You were walking on four legs. You were only fitting in because I warmed your seat.”
“Once we met Twilight, who went to a different school, I guessed that you were in a similar situation; living in a faraway place or something. I'm sorry, If I’d have known you were in hiding, I’d have looked for you sooner…”
“You wouldn’t have found me. I got pretty good at hiding from you girls. Besides, it’d have been better for you if you didn’t find me. I’m only talking to you because Wallflower thought it’d be a good idea.” Sunset paused. “That and I... can't do this any more.”
Months of isolation were fully visible on New Sunset’s face without her cruel smirk hiding it. She was tired, and had reached the end of her ability to hide by herself in complete isolation. No wonder that she had begun risking her precious secrecy to interact with me. She had been desperate, and I couldn’t blame her.
“So, what now?” Rainbow asked, resting her hands on a table. “There’s two Sunset Shimmers! You can’t both go to school.”
“Why not?” Applejack asked.
“Well, it’s… I mean, there’s probably paperwork or something.” Rainbow frowned. “Actually, nevermind. I don't want to look like I care about paperwork.”
New Sunset tensed. I put my hand on her shoulder, so gently that I was afraid she couldn’t feel me at all.
“We’ll work something out together,” Sunset One said. “It’s good that we finally know you exist. Now, we can do something to fix this.” She breathed out. “Firstly, I’m not an alien. I’m actually a unicorn from another land beyond the portal. I’m sort of your pony counterpart, if that makes sense. I'm not an imposter; I really am you, just different.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s still an alien. I’ve been tracking the wavelengths your weird science has been giving off ever since you arrived.”
“Wavelengths? You mean the magic leaking from Equestria?” Twilight asked.
“Magic is fake and everyone knows it. It’s some sci-fi electromagnetic field. Otherwise how would I be able to detect it using wires and stuff?”
“Because you can tap into magical fields using advanced modern technology with the right approach,” Twilight explained. “It’s what I’ve been studying for years! The scientific analysis of magic.”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Oh no, it’s happening again…”
“That’s ridiculous. If you can detect it with scientific implements then it’s science. Magic doesn’t exist. It’s one of the things that defines magic! Look, here's what it is. There are two dimensions, that much I know, existing out of phase. The portal 'thing' isn’t a portal; it’s a device that alters the phase we resonate at in this dimension, which is what causes you to shift from one place to another.”
“You figured all that out from watching us?” Sunset One asked.
“I’m smart. Apparently the only smart one if you guys insist on believing in fairytales and magic!”
“I am literally a unicorn.”
“If it’s from a different planet then it’s still an alien! Ugh! Wallflower, get me a whiteboard. I need to explain this to these idiots.”
“I’m not sure it’s that important,” Twilight interjected. “What matters is that you know about the portal, the other dimension, all of it. Your, um, unique rationalisation is not critical.”
Sunset One approached me as Twilight and New Sunset began arguing. Applejack and Rainbow Dash began ignoring them and talked amongst themselves, and I noticed that the others were similarly disinterested in the discussion on the finer differences between magic and science.
“It’s like looking in a mirror from years ago,” Sunset told me. “Except the reflection is warped from the long time spent isolated, and also having been brought up in a magic-less world, among other things. I’m glad you decided to try to help her; I know from experience that it’s hard to be me without friends.”
“I didn’t have that much choice in the matter,” I admitted. “She sort of just… picked me.”
“Well, she could have picked a lot worse.” Sunset's smile faded. “She wouldn't have opened up to me. Ever. I wouldn't have. I'd have seen me as a rival."
"Will she come around?"
"I’m pretty confident that things will turn out all right. After all, I did. We might be messed up, but we're still the same person deep down.”
“If you say so. I get the feeling that this isn’t really resolved yet.”
Sunset leaned back. “Stuff like this rarely gets resolved in one go. You and I both know that. You can make a change and it feels like the biggest deal at the time, but the day after that and it’s just more challenges and effort to make it stick. This is why she needs a friend she can open up to. Right now, that isn't me. I know that I could be difficult, especially back before I found friends."
"I'd like to help," I said. "I... like her a lot."
Sunset softened and looked at her clone. "I'd appreciate it. If you need help, let me know… but she clearly likes you.”
I straightened. “I think that I’m okay with keeping her company for a time.” I smiled. “Especially once her rougher edges get a bit worn down.”
“Yes, well, I had a fair few of those. Like I said, let me or the others know if you need help.” Sunset patted me on the shoulder. “Thanks again.”
“Do you, um, feel better now you’ve actually met her?” I asked Sunset.
Sunset, my Sunset, leaned back on the bench in the garden, adjusting some switches and knobs on her mysterious beeping device. “I guess. On one hand I can’t just go on a rampage if I want to any more, but on the other it’s less stressful. Besides, I’m kind of over being mean for no reason anyway.”
Beep!
“I meant to ask… I saw you with that thing earlier.” I gestured at her modified microwave. “What is that… exactly?”
“It’s a microwave.”
“Well, I can see that...”
“I changed some stuff inside it to make it more susceptible to the dimensional wavelengths, which actually aren't that far off microwaves. At first I just used it as a detector. If there was dimensional energy radiating from something, it’d go beep.”
Beep!
“Speaking of, those plundervines have a fair bit of that energy in them. Pretty sure that’s what’s setting it off all the time.”
“They’re magical?” I asked, looking at my precious plants. “I guess that makes sense. They do grow extraordinarily fast! And are also very aggressive.” I tilted my head. "Kind of like you. Aggressive, dangerous, but you grew on me pretty fast."
“That's... cute? I've never been compared to a plant before. Anyway... I’ve since modified the device a bit more. I can even affect the energy fields now if I’m careful.”
“Like how Twilight did at the Friendship Games?”
“Hmm? Sorry, I wasn’t there. All I've seen is her lab.” Sunset sighed. “Give me a that much funding and I’ll make her 'magic' look like cheap tricks.”
“She opened a lot of portals and became a sort of demon.”
Sunset whistled. “I could easily turn myself into a demon thing. Not that I think it’s a competition. I’m just saying that I could.”
“I’d prefer it if you didn’t.”
“I wasn’t going to!” Sunset folded her arms and tilted her head. “She was pretty hot as a demon though... could be fu~un...”
“No!”
“Kidding, kidding.”
For a moment we sat in silence as Sunset adjusted her device some more. I began tending to my garden, too. Some of the students visiting noticed us together. Blood rushed to my cheeks. It felt strange, being romantically involved with anyone for the first time. It felt even stranger knowing that the person I was involved with was… complicated.
“Hey. I want to show you something,” Sunset said, and took me by the hand.
We went outside the school to the site of the portal. I remembered it well. It was here when the pony Sunset had confronted Twilight and turned into a demoness in front of everyone. It had been the start of the school’s complicated relationship with magic.
“What are we looking for?” I asked Sunset, glancing over at her anxiously. “This is a pretty magical place, you know.”
Sunset set her modified microwave on the ground. “Magic is fake, Wallflower. Watch this.”
Beep!
Boop!
“Moment of truth!”
Violet and orange light flickered inside the microwave, crackling and dancing inside its cheap plastic interior. With a buzz, lightning arced from its door, now sprung open.
Sunset’s hand wrapped around mine, eyes fixed on her device. “Now that’s what I call science!”
I clutched Sunset’s arm. I would have been frightened, were I not with her. There were few things I could think of that scared me any more. Magic, memory stones, even public speaking didn't seem so bad any more.
Like curtains being parted, the fabric of reality itself bent itself open. Electric strands like wires popped at the seams, and before my very eyes, a portal to Equestria opened up in front of us both.
It was a gaping hole in what I considered real and tangible, the size of a person. On the other side, I could see hills… forests. A fantasy land I had only glimpsed before at the Friendship games. This was the world the other Sunset came from.
Sunset laughed.
“Ha ha! I knew I could do it.” She stamped her foot. “Take that, alien me! Magic is conclusively worse than science!”
“You know you could have asked Sunset to activate it?”
"Where's the fun in that? No way I'm relying on her fancy 'magic'." Sunset spun around and clutched my arms, looking into my eyes. “What? I wasn’t kidding when I said I wasn’t lazying about at home instead of going to school. I was studying for this.” She faced the portal. “I needed to know what kind of world is on the other side that sends stuff like alien me over to our world. So I made it happen! Me! By myself!”
A kernel of anxiety grew inside me. “You’re not going to go through, are you?”
Sunset paused.
“Well, I mean, sure. Why wouldn’t I?” She turned to face me, looking into my eyes. “The other Sunset has already pretty much taken my life at this point. Meeting her confirmed it; there’s a me-shaped hole in that other world that is waiting to be filled. I’ve got to at least see what it’s like.”
“What about me, then?” I asked. “What was the point of me?”
Sunset bit her lip. “At first… I just wanted someone to remember me. Not the nice, kind me… but the me I am.” She held my hands. “I wanted someone to remember that Sunset Shimmer was me. Not her.” With her thumb, she stroked the outside of my hand. “I didn’t expect to find someone who… well. Liked me. Wanted me.”
Truth be told, I didn’t know if liked was the right word. I just knew what I felt in my body and heart when I was near her and I knew for certain that I didn’t want to let her go.
“You can’t leave,” I said. “That’s not fair.”
Sunset spluttered. “Well, I was going to come back. And I'm not leaving now! That would be crazy, and even I'm not that insane.”
Oh.
“I mean, the plan was originally to leave and never come back, but you changed that.”
I mellowed. I had imagined that this was some sort of goodbye. An ending.
“Sorry, I guess I didn’t read the room right. You’re coming back?”
“Yeah. I mean, probably. If I can. The energy field might work differently on the other side, so it might take some time to adjust my machine…”
I frowned. "No, no, I don't want to hear that. I don't want maybes! Your counterpart told me to look after you, so if you go and get stuck on the other side, she’ll never forgive me.”
“She probably will though…”
I felt frustration build inside me; I knew that Sunset wasn't going to ever stop wanting to see the other world, and honestly, I didn't want to stop her. However, I was just a bit tired of Sunset making these decisions without me at least biting back.
“No talking.” I lunged, taking Sunset by surprise for once by locking lips with her. The lessons I had learned from letting Sunset take control the evening before had been branded into my mind, and this time, I knew exactly how to handle her. Sunset was like a wild animal, but with confidence, I knew I had tamed her.
In fact, the way she melted in my mouth made me think that she enjoyed being tamed.
Sunset rocked back on her heels, off-balance. Her arms wrapped around my back to keep her from falling, and despite my small frame, I was steady enough to keep her close against me. When I pulled away, it was on my terms. It wasn’t me left lingering, hovering for more, but her.
“If you don’t come back I’ll never kiss you again,” I said.
Sunset’s fingers moved on their own towards her lips. She swallowed, catching her breath.
“Um… understood.”
I drifted my hand down her side, brushing against her waist, and softened. “I’m serious. I’ll have to come and get you otherwise.”
“Well, we can’t have that,” Sunset replied, trying to salvage some control over the conversation. “I’ll figure it out. If there’s magi—… I mean, the energy field on the other side it can’t be that hard.” She leaned down and picked up her microwave. Behind her the portal closed shut. "Questions for later."
"If I can get someone to take care of the garden, maybe I'll come with you."
"Whew. That's a lot of pressure on me to make it work, then." Sunset whistled. "I haven't got complaints."
We began walking back towards the school. Sunset snaked her hand into mine.
"Nicely kissed, by the way."
"Thanks."
Fin
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Hm, it's probably due to the word limit but the ending has problems.
Sunset meeting Pony Sunset didn't do a lot at the end of things, and the girl's actions were really questionable. This is the original Sunset, the one that Ponyset replaced without knowing or caring, yet they all treat her like she's the impostor. Worse is Ponyset herself, who not only doesn't apologize or show empathy for her counterpart but she simply pushes a responsability that by all reasons should be hers at Wallflower.
I feel like the whole Sunset meeting Ponyset could've been taken out and rather make it so Sunset decides to leave without meeting her counterpart.
Maybe I'm missing something.
On the other hand, the end was sweet and I found some moments pretty funny, especialy the "I'm literally a unicorn" bit.
Ponyset needs to tell Wallflower about the mirror, and send a message to Celestia so she doesn't freak out when she gets word of Sunset running around.
Seeing a Sunset like this and a lot of the plot points that you present are really interesting and maybe you could explore them further out of a word limit.
It's still getting a favorite and like from me, and ceirtanly a follow.
I wonder if there’s actually a problem with two sunsets in one world.
10757895 Well, there's a few days left, so I'm not above trying to find ways to address some feedback before the deadline. : ) It will be a bit tricky though. I am literally at the word limit. Also apparently at least one judge as checked this out early, ha ha.
To be truthful, were it up to me this'd be about twice as long and we'd also see Sunset go to the pony world and find that she doesn't really fit in much there either. There'd have been a classy moral about fitting in being about the people you're with instead of a place, etceterah etceterah, which'd strengthen the bond Sunset had with both Wallflower and her pony counterpart. Something along those lines, at least. That certainly won't happen for this contest, though, due to massive word and time restrictions, and probably won't happen as a post-contest expansion either since, whilst the reception was very positive, there doesn't seem to be that much interest in the story.
At the end of the day I'm fairly happy to keep this about an isolated, angry girl making her very first connection. Or something. I don't actually like telling readers what my intentions were during writing since I don't like telling people what to think about my stories.
Very glad you enjoyed it though! I hope you do well in the contest my dude. : )
10758412
I think most of the judges are holding back from reading anything till the contest ends
I think you can revisit this matter with just human Sunset and not Wallflower in a romantic relationship, as much as that would be considered blasphemy. There're many ways of playing with a topic, and this one is really interesting
10758690
Yeah I imagine they are. I did find one of them here though! 10754996 Look, there she is. : ) Golly, a lot of upvotes on her comment, too. I guess a lot of people agreed with her. Good. Chapter 3 is working as intended.
She thought I'd forget her being here. But I didn't! Hap always remembers. I'd remember if I forgot something.
Regarding expanding on the idea, honestly, I find Human Sunset to be a curious little blind spot that's fun to think about. I have projects to deal with in the meantime, though, so it'll be a while until I ever get around to approaching it. I'm sure it's something you could investigate, though, should the mood strike you!
10758690
We’d been holding off on reviewing, but a lot of us have been reading and keeping up with the stories, even as they were still coming in.
Anyway, I’m Posh.
Congrats on I-A-M’s judge award on the contest!
So like... what the fuck? That was one of the best short stories i think I’ve ever read on this site. And possibly ever. Seriously though, like what the fuck.
'Feral Native!Sunset, are you in danger of becoming a domesticated creature?'
'Never!'
'Good answer. Now no badgering the waiter tonight or I won't be I sucking your lips off later.'
'How about I--'
'No. Lips.'
'Fiiine.'
This was certainly a unique take. Thanks for writing.
10797698 I am quite fond of this one to be fair! It suffered a bit from word limits but I'm actually quite happy with the Wallflower/Sunset dynamic I went with. I very much didn't want to have a Wallflower that was just sort of sad and mopey, which I felt was the way she often gets interpreted.
I mean there's a bit of that in here, but I feel like she has a bit of fight in her regardless. : )
Glad you enjoyed reading!
10800557
Unique was the goal! : ) I hope it was interesting and somewhat fun.
Mmm, this very good, yes. :3
Neeeeerd! :V Also, I love how the line after this reminded me Wallflower's actually the narrator. I kind of forgot about her!
10964136 Forgetting about Wallflower is sort of a thing that happens in-universe so I don't blame you! She's sort of famous for it.
Alright, here we are. That... was really, really good. But I already said as much. Hm. Repetition helps memory? Something like that.
As others have mentioned already, your version of Wallflower is unique. (Duh.) And I like it a lot. I'm still a bit... let's call it 'worried' about Sunsets mental state. As someone who's not quite right in the head myself, I know that being social and interacting with others can be quite a challenge. And dragging that massive baggage into something as complex and tiresome as a relationship is... I don't know. My first instinct was to write 'dooming it to fail', but I actually don't want to go that far. It does make it loads more difficult, though. Me thinks.
It's their first relationship, too. Somehow that just dawned on me. Goodness gracious, they will face so many issues. I should probably stop reading too much into it. They'll be fine. They'll manage. It's how these things turn out. Here, anyway.
One thing this story made me curious about is... their upbringing, actually. It's something that was never mentioned in the show much, either. Or rather in the Equestria Girls-movies. I mean, sure, Twi had a brother. But people don't exist in a vacuum. This Sunset Shimmer probably was the way she was because of circumstances. A single child, I assume. I wonder... she said she went home to study magic. What was her home like? How were her parents? To do what she did, she had to be living alone, right? If not, how did that even work?
So much more to think about.
Also, what the heck did Discord do for these seeds to end up here.
A very entertaining ride.
Thank you for writing!
11452991 A lot of relationships don't work. That doesn't mean, I feel, that they're not worth having, and my feeling is that even if Wally and Sunny don't stay together, both of the versions of these characters will probably have benefitted from this early foray into romance. It's entirely possible they might outgrow one another, or even break up and get back together. Or they could be fine. Either way, my personal reading (bearing in mind Death of the Author) is that this has been a good experience for them, even if (and this was intentional) there were unhealthy undertones, or even somewhat toxic ones, to their relationship.
They're both fairly unusual characters, so I didn't think a usual romance would really suit them, and I don't know where it may end up going for them in the future.
11453165
I will certainly agree that there is a lot of potential there. And yes, a 'regular' romance would probably have ended up being somewhat... bland, I suppose.
Thank you.