• Member Since 10th Jun, 2014
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

HapHazred


It's called garbage can, not garbage can't.

E

The Changeling Invasion of Canterlot left many scarred and traumatized, and Lyra is one of them. Her therapist advises her to make a new friend, since Bon-Bon is often busy.

Things aren't as simple as they seem.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 42 )

A nice little story about helping a friend.

5781838 I know, right? Thanks for reading!

Nice little one-shot here. There was one significant grammar mistake I felt the need to point out:

"I don't think so," the mare replied. "My name is Candy Cane." She extended her hoof over to Lyra, who briefly examined the offending appendage, before gingerly taking the pony's hoof. Gaining confidence, she shook it. "Lyra. Nice to meet you."

This paragraph has the dialogue of two characters in it. You need to split it up into two so that each has only one character speaking.

In addition, you don't need an apostrophe after "dunno".

5781930 Ooh, good catch. Cheers, thanks for reading.

Although in regards to the dunno, typically it depends. Apostrophes are used for abbreviations in slang and such, and since 'dunno' is most definitely slang-y, I'm pretty sure it's a solid use of the apostrophe.

5781933 Perhaps, but you're the only person I know of who does it.

5782331 Odd. I'll investigate, but throughout most of my reading, I've seen it done.

5782331 Yeah, I think I see what happened. A long time ago, when contractions like that weren't so commonplace, they required the apostrophe. So, in a lot of books I read as a kid, they were pretty rampant. These days, I guess nobody cares to put them in.

That's what I'm reading, anyhow. It may be completely wrong, and I'll never know.

5782356 You'd think English textbooks would be consistent about that sort of thing.

5782406
lol. Welcome to English. The living language. It's always changing.

This is an excellent seed for a good story. I recommend watering it.

5782624 Oh, I know all too well.

CANDY CANE!!! :trixieshiftright:
I'M ONTO YOU!!!!!!

This is a nice story, it was really well written.

I'm not one to demand a sequel (except by not-so-subtly stating that the world would be better with one), but I think that this is one of those one-shots that could smoothly segue into a larger story. Of course, like with many of those one-shots, it stands wonderfully on its own; although it provides an opening to continue the story, it also has a sense of closure that allows it to end here with a natural feel.

I love it, by the way. I think Bon Bon better make

The psychiatrist's gender jumps around a bit near the end of the story.

Well this would explain Bon Bon of the many voices. Then again I always did like the explanation her candy did it.

5782406 The english language is... Changeling, yes?

Oh, I am so witty!
5782624

5787345 Thanks a bunch! I'm glad you all liked it.

I have no idea in terms of continuation (since I'm pretty terrible with longs stuff) but I'll keep it in mind. This is the second time I've been asked for a sequel. I'm beginning to like it.

...

Go on.
5787523
5782840

5798514 What? The English are all changelings?! I knew it!

Wow I just finished this Hap, and I have to say that this was a excellent job to say the lead. I look forward to reviewing this ( shoudla did thia like a day ago :twilightsheepish:)

On to it then...

DF

Interesting... I like it.

5782356

It's probably the same trend that's...

1. ...relegated "to whom" to formal speech because "to who" reduces the grammatical complexity of the language without reducing its expressiveness.

2. ...slowly killing off the "fiance" (masculine) form of "fiancee" because, with neither the diacritic-bearing é from the original French spelling nor the distinctive "-ee" transcription of "-ée", it looks like it should rhyme with "finance" (fy-ance).

(I'm not sure why, but that tendency to borrow feminine forms seems to extend beyond the -ee ending. See, for example, the "-ive" ending. "naive" as opposed to "naïf"... I wish we could have borrowed the diaresis too though. If we wrote "naïve" instead of "naive", then we wouldn't need a weird spelling like "knive" when we really do want a gliding vowel.)

Using apostrophes as possessives and in place of omitted letters in contractions makes sense as a way to clarify meaning when the ease of inferring from context varies.

Using apostrophes to indicate slang is something I've never heard of (and English grammar is both a hobby interest of mine and something I have an intuitive knack for) and it's non-obvious. (Especially given that, for slang, you'd intuitively expect it to be more rooted in direct phonetic transcription which often doesn't merely omit letters from existing words.)

Comment posted by Random Order deleted Aug 8th, 2015

5994597 I use an iPad. I always use the diacritic marks. The words don't look right to me otherwise.

This was awesome, wonderful, fabulous, just great.
The changelings, I thought there'd be more, like eight.
Suddenly there seems to be one and she's quite late.
Telling her friend the truth is hard straight from the starting gate.
But this nice little story has a good ending, one that's not filled with strife.
For as the tag says, it is truly slice of life.

6298231 Changeling stories have plenty of fighting
So why put another battle to writing?
Besides, the best thing about them by far
Is you never know exactly who they are
So telling a story about one and her friend
Was entertaining for me from beginning to end.

Bon Bon is greatest secret agent spy!

Best friend extrordinaire!

I decided to check out one of your older stories today, Hap. This one was cute with a deliciously heart-warming twist that I honestly didn't see coming. The part that Bon Bon was a changeling was one thing, but that she was also Candy Cane to help Lyra cope was an excellent addition. Sorry I didn't see this one back when we were doing the EFNW contest!

6303946 No worries, mate. These days I hardly have time to read anything that's not either Goodfic Bin or under five thousand words. I'm glad you liked this one.

I was quite taken with the idea that her new friend would also be her old one. I liked the idea of screwing with the contest rules that way. Unfortunately, there's only two you can pick to enter, and I preferred the other two more.

6303952 Well then, I may have to submit my project to the Bin if I'm ever to have a hope of you reading it! :rainbowlaugh:

Still, I actually think this one might have done well in the contest. I think it really strikes a chord in a way that's unexpected, which not too many of the entries did.

6303972 Oh, I certainly like this one very much. I think the chord struck with me was with the other two, though.

I loved the idea of Celestia's arrival not being a big deal on planet Earth, and I desperately wanted to shove that idea in everyone's faces. But the Unlikely Teacher and Unwilling Student was pretty important to me, since I really enjoy education and the idea of being forced to learn something you don't want to was rather near and dear to my heart.

I tend to like all the stories I write, though. At least, at the time I hit the publish button.

...Oh, this is going to blow up really badly. :fluttershyouch:

Not sure why this is marked as completed because wow, is that ending a drama bomb in bad needing of diffusing.

6304742 Shhhhh. Bombs don't blow up if nobody finds out.

media.giphy.com/media/zSgWRDLwC1mJG/giphy.gif

6304742 I always find it funny when people mix up "defusing" a bomb with "diffusing". Dispersing it in a fine mist is probably bad...

6494982

I always find it funny when people mix up "defusing" a bomb with "diffusing". Dispersing it in a fine mist is probably bad...

:facehoof:

In my defense, I'm not a native English speaker and bomb disarmament jargon isn't exactly day-to-day conversation. :twilightsheepish:

Although to be fair, moving and blowing the bomb up under controlled circumstances is actually standard procedure. That can technically turn the whole thing into a mist! :pinkiehappy:

Really enjoyed this story. Just disappointed that there isn't more. It's an interesting premise and I'd like to have seen Bon Bon reveal herself to Lyra.

7573480 Originally this was for a contest with a really teeny 3000 word limit, so I was kinda struggling to get stories that fit. I wouldn't have minded writing more myself, but it's been a long time since I finished this one.

Glad you enjoyed it, though.

Nice little story, would definitely read the sequel, if there was one. :twilightsmile:

Definitely could use a sequel.

wow, nice fake-out there!

10300528 Cheers, thanks for the read! : )

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