Kyuubi325
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Very good chapter. Are we gonna be able to see Twilight break away from Celestia and perhaps try to find a new solution, or is she gonna stay a follower to the end?
ooooooooooof.
I’m liking this very much! The political and economic fallout resulting from Luna releasing the contents of Nightlight’s journal in the previous story provides an interesting scenario. I’m very interested to see how this story progresses.
ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, i wanna read more
Dis ll be fun.
Wow. Excellent job capturing the essence of the first story, and refining it into something that can make more. I love all of this, tensions rising and the drums of war can be heard on the horizon, and if he isn't freed soon, the dogs will come fast and hard, to get back their best friend.
There were a few grammar and spacing mistakes here and there, but other than that well done. I'm looking forward to more!
Damn that's good writing. More please
Man, how fcked up is this version of Equestria.
Essentially they had to have contact with humans
Maybe magic influenced, mutated dogs from earth?
Maybe when they got transported to this world ,some humans got with them too or some pictures, drawings of humans and dogs together?
And he should keep giving answers like that ,that don't involve helping them with their repopulation problem.
Him giving her an advise to release scholars to minotaurs was acceptable because it's didn't gave them anything.
Maybe even speeding things up.
If Ironbark will get to kill the scientists faster then he will pressure them more to get more even faster
Hyped for future chapters, and a great start! I was hoping this would be continued, hehe.
while this is very interesting, and I love the story and can't wait to see where it goes, you use a lot of ellipses. and it's honestly... kinda distracting. every time a character talks, their sentence ends with one. maybe cut down on them a bit?
I hope the ponies are saved, for their *sake. Pinkie did the right thing, in my opinion. Very good chapter. Also, there were a few spelling and grammatical errors that distracted from the chapter
Several spelling issues, but the idea came across fine. I can't remember, why are ponies having fertility issues again?
10652486
Nobody knows
10652486
Not revealed. My guess maybe too much big-magic-rads used at some point?
Very good start for a story. One of the very few stories that actually forces readers to think.
I really don't hate the Celestia of this story very much. Agreed what she has done is repugnant, and she should be punished. But she is like a mother to the ponies, and what crazy lengths would a mother go through in order to save her dying children? Rare for me to feel sympathy for the bad guy.
Aaron, however, feels like a disapointment. I get that he hates Celestia, and he is more than justified in hating her. But delighting in her torment is kinda messed up because such torment comes at the suffering of millions innocent ponies, the extinction of a species, and the potential for war that will get many innocent people killed - both ponies and non-ponies. What kind of person is happy to get what they want at such a price? Also, when Celestia finally does snap and becomes Daybreaker, the whole planet could be destroyed as she uses the sun to vent her rage and sorrow. I get Aaron is a victim of Celestia's experiments, but he seems to be praying for the situation to go from terrible to a downright genocidal disaster. Very rare, but a part of me dislikes this 'good guy.'
Looking forward to future chapters.
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Well it's simple, he's not a good guy, not even close. This story doesn't really have good guys, just people in a horrible position making thigs worse with the best of intentions. Anon really isn't in a position to make things any better, and he really hasn't done anything to make things worse.
That's all on Celestia.
So, as an alternative to suicide, or going mad with hate/spite/despair, he's supping from the bitter cup of schadenfreude. It's all burning down anyway, he may as well appreciate the fireglow...
Congrats on creating such a popular story.
10652648
to point out he actually tried to commit suicide and why it didn't work is part of why he hates Celestia and her administration.
That phrase "swinging from the ceiling" tends to be the most common description of someone who's committed suicide via hanging, as no one likes to address suicide out in the open, either the person doing so (either because they're doing so out of fear of death or to avoid people reading too much into their intentions and trying to stop them) or the people finding the bodies.
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Radiation?
Magic radiation?
.......oh
10652540
......fuck I'm not the first one to guess that using the rainbow power can have consequences on your balls......
1:16
Maybe it's alicorns magic?
The problem seemed to escalate the longer Celestia stayed as a ruler
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The ponies that are alive right now are doomed ,you can't save them , there is no cure.
Maybe their close contact with magic caught up to them , who knows for now?
The only ones who can be saved are hybrids and a new generation of ponies if they are successful in creating them,they souldn't have any contact with Celestia ,especially if it's nature of alicorns magic at fault
10652720
Precisely. He tried suicide, and he wasn't permitted to die. So, as an alternative he's chosen to cultivate a deep and abiding hatred for the one mare he considers responsible for all this. Spite can be an amazing motivator, it might be the only thing keeping him stable.
Goodness knows he isn't receiving proper psychological help...
10652814
"You won't let me die?"
"Ok then,NOW it's super personal and I will make you regret this decision "
"Let me create for you the worst possible timeline "
10652814
my apologies, the way I read your initial comment I interpreted it as "he chose not to commit suicide and instead chose to enjoy the show" as opposed to trying and failing. Thank you for clarifying
Whike good, what really bothers me is that Aaron is far too nice to Celestia, too willing to forgive and believe she actually has pure intentions. She's just evil and fucking selfish. From the start she qnd her cadre have thrown morality under the bus, disregarding the life and wellbeing of everything that isn't a "Pony". It isn't enough that they crossbreed, she has to crush and destroy every trace of a non-pony in her little toys, because she only cares about having them for herself. Likewise all the nonponies she's using are abused and their suffering is never allowed to end.
I have a feeling Pinkie has talked to the other girls and they are probably hating Celestia just as much as she is. Except Twilight of course. Right now the only possible solutions via magic might be a youth spell and the mirror pool to create viable clones and breed them. Physically the other option is to surrender to another kingdom and ask for all the help in the world. The other thing is to find out what has done this to there child bearing population. Radiation? Magic? Everyone ate Poison Joke?
The internet loves genocide.
I have nothing against ponykind in this story, but I'm kind of hoping that they die out as a species for no other reason than that the World is trying really, really hard to get rid of them. I'm of the opinion that the world itself has some form of intelligence, and that ponies get their cutie marks based on the world having an understanding of their place inside itself. So if the very world is trying to gently bring ponies to extinction, without causing any direct suffering whatsoever, just preventing new generations from popping up to fill in the gaps, maybe it has a reason for doing it.
10652803
Definitely magic acting like radiation.
Just watching the show and you see it (magic) bring used everywhere to solve every problem. Need to grow crops? Forget fertilizer - Earth pony magic. Weather on demand, control over day and night, etc- ponies use magic with the same ease that we humans use electricity, chemistry, and at one point lead and radium.
And like humans the ponies don't completely understand it. Enough to use it? Sure, but not enough to be aware of any potential long term downsides. And nothing is more long term than a slowly expanding mass sterility. My bet is that the birth rate was already dropping decades ago and this is just the time when no one can ignore the elephant in the rom.
10652611
10652648
i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/001/453/054/02d.png
10653450
Remember how the "Tree of Harmony" was in all actuality an artifact of pony creation? Who is to say the sun and moon's dependence on Celestia and Luna was also an artificial creation? How the changing of the seasons and the weather control as well? We've seen some places where the world refuses to be controlled in the North and the Everfree Forest. Maybe the magic itself is just tired of their nonsense?
Since Grogar and the Smooze is still a thing, what if generation 1 ponies had help in the form of a blonde haired human girl to aid them? If the ponies forgot about this once great heroine but the rest of the world didn't?
10653685
Considering said Human girls Brother taggged along on some of her Adventures Humanity may have crossed with the ponies before.
To go even deeper the spell originally was to give cross specie couples children point at the above sentence.
10653685
The suggestion that Ponies have enslaved the natural order of the world and have been defiling it for the last several thousand years make me hope they die off even more.
Realistically, what is lost if the last mortal pony dies off of old age in 50 years? Is it so horrible that the turnip farm down the road is plowed by a diamond dog instead of an earth pony? That a middle aged griffon hen is buying that black tourmaline bracelet instead of a unicorn?
Having ponies around is nice for the sake of variety among the sapient races, but they are hardly necessary, and the lengths they have gone to to try to stick around is starting to turn them into monsters anyway. I don't know how many rape-scientists a species is allowed to have before you have to just label them all as a lost cause, but ponies are very close to that number.
10653637
I dont get it.
10652648
Strange. I point out how the author did a really good job at stirring thoughts about judgement/condemnation of his characters (which is what makes it a really good Tradegy, which the author tagged it as such. There is no clear good guy winning/bad guy losing) yet everyone seems to hate the comment.
This was never going to have a happy ending.
Oh, dang... I just realized. They do have one pony left who could provide viable genetic material (though she'd need to be a bit older before she can provide it). I'm talking about Cozy Glow, presumably still preserved in stone. It's only a matter of time before they realize this and once they do, I feel sorry for her (assuming they haven't freed and locked her up in a lab already).
"No cost too great."
If Celestia is the Fork King, is AAron the Hollow Knight?
10654445
Pale King from Hollow Knight.
So, is the issue that for some reason ponies are sterile now so they have to make hybrid ponies to maintain the existence of their people and a future for ponykind, but their being hybrid causes terrible defects as it usually does?
Jesus Christ is this dark. Unnervingly so. But really well done, honestly. How satisfyingly horrifying!
10657137
Not terrible defects, unless with a human donor, they just have traits of both species/tribes when they are born which Celestia sees as undesirable for some reason.
10670222
Ah, thanks for clearing it up. Definitely a problem that ponies can't make more ponies, but rather obviously hybrids aren't the solution because that's not pure pony, and human hybrids are unfortunate permacripples that shouldn't exist.
"Breed out the non-pony traits"...
I wonder if our hero will tell Celestia about kennel clubs back on earth. So called "Purebreds" actually being 'inbreds".
Aron's advise helps doom equestria all the faster. And he didn't even need to lie to do it.
Jesus Christ this is dark, I love it.
Anyways, if you guys want to see how that execution thing goes, here's a reenactment.
(WARNING: GORE)
Question: were the Crystal Ponies having more kids, thus why some were being kidnapped?
And also...did Celestia also use Thestral's (Bat Ponies) and hide it from Luna? Surprised they did not outright rebel after Luna fled.
10653042
Oh that last part is easy if you been keeping up with the IDW comic line,
You see discord one brought Fluttershy and the CMC to help the fertility Goddess Bast against a possessed Anubis, during this time Bast noticed Shy's closeness with Discord and took exception to her ex and the bearer being together, since he had traveled through time to do so she had to wait to strike and that time is now.
10746321
Shame we probably wont ever find out. Seems this story isnt getting worked on.
Always nice to see an update!
I wonder, is Twilight freeing the prisoners, going mad, or both?
(Ooooooh, what HAS Twilight done? Self-delusion, denial, and double-think, can only go so far... now that she's 'snapped' again, made an impulsive decision, what is she going to do? What has she done? And what will Celestia's reaction be? So many questions! I look forward to the answers.)